PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a welterweight MMA rules bout between Jon Snitch (ranked 2520 p4p, 2814 weight class) and Turbo Epicity (ranked 370 p4p, 411 weight class). Snitch's ring entrance music is that housewives' favourite, I Wanna Rock. The crowd seem to be enjoying Epicity's choice of entrance music: Life In The Fast Lane. Both fighters really staring each other down here, as Turbo Epicity enters the cage!

Snitch
vs
Epicity

183 cm
39
173
27 - 25 - 2

185 cm
39
177
29 - 14 - 2

Good wrestling
Excellent boxer
Very quick

Good wrestler
World class boxer
Good gas tank

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the welterweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 27 - 25 - 2, fighting out of Las Vegas, Jon Snitch!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 29 - 14 - 2, fighting out of Las Vegas, Turbo Epicity!
The judges for this bout are Yukihiro Shimada, Tatsuya Matsuyama and Yasuomi Hirokawa.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Snitch fails with a rather predictable takedown attempt.
Snitch shoots in looking for a takedown but Epicity manages to keep the fight standing, pushing Snitch's face into the canvas for good measure before circling away.
Epicity lands a nice looking kick to the body. Snitch takes a step back to recover.

Snitch drives through with a really nice takedown into side control.
A lull in the action here.
Epicity isn't going anywhere.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Epicity is trying to escape the position but Snitch is controlling the position.
Epicity controls the position for a moment.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Epicity prevents Snitch from improving position.
Epicity is letting Snitch control him for a moment.
Epicity struggling a bit here.
Snitch scoring with punches and elbows.
The referee asks Snitch politely if he wouldn't mind getting on with it and actually doing something. Snitch prefers to stall for the moment though.
You can see the frustration on Epicity's face, being in this tough position on the bottom.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Snitch tries to move to mount but Epicity blocks the move with his legs.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
There's not a lot going on here and the crowd are letting the fighters know they're not willing to tolerate a lack of action.
You can see the frustration on Epicity's face as Snitch controls the position.
Epicity is trying to get back to half guard. He's pushing on Snitch's leg. He's managed it. Nice work.
Epicity is holding on to half guard well.
Snitch perhaps working for something from half guard, or maybe not. It looks like he's just sitting there.
Epicity is trying to get back to full guard.
Snitch sitting and controlling from the half guard.

The referee has decided to stand the fighters back up, so we'll restart on the feet.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Epicity misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Snitch.
Epicity tries a head kick but it misses.
A little feinted left hand from Snitch on the counter but he doesn't commit to it.

Snitch drops down and drives through with a powerful takedown into guard.
Epicity controlling Snitch's posture.
Snitch definitely looks more muscular than last time we saw him fight.
Snitch is intent on slowing down the pace of the fight, simply looking to control.
Epicity is adopting a defensive guard.
Epicity looks more muscular than last time we saw him. He must have been on the weights.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Epicity wants to stand and escape but Snitch is having none of it.
Epicity keeping moving, preventing Snitch from controlling successfully.
Epicity keeping full guard, as Snitch tries to pass.

The referee has decided to stand the fighters back up, so we'll restart on the feet.
Snitch misses with a takedown
and Epicity counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Jon Snitch. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Boooooooooooooooooooo!!! God, this has been a terrible round. Come on you two, sort yourselves out!
Epicity cracks a nice hook into Snitch's ribs.
Epicity misses the shot to the body.
Snitch was looking to counter that move with a punch but didn't quite pull the trigger.
Epicity will need to close the distance a bit before he attacks - that leg kick was thrown from too far away.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

A close round but Turbo Epicity will probably get the nod.
That's time! Back to the action!

A punch combination from Snitch misses.

Epicity gets caught napping as Snitch dives in and scores a takedown. Epicity manages to retain guard.
Epicity is trying to control the position but Snitch postures up.
Snitch content to stall in guard here.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Epicity has control of Snitch's left arm, preventing Snitch from doing any damage.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Let's hope that Epicity has the urge to step up the pace any second now because for the last 15 or 20 seconds he's just been holding on tight.
Snitch is frustrating his opponent with some stalling tactics from top position.
Snitch wants to control from the top but Epicity keeps moving.

The ref stands the fighters back up due to a lack of activity.
Epicity defends well against a solid takedown attempt from Snitch.
Snitch fails miserably with a takedown attempt.
Snitch throws a looping left and ducks down for a takedown. He's got his arms around Epicity's waist but Epicity gets an underhook and avoids the takedown by throwing Snitch off to one side.
Epicity throws a counter combo.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Jon Snitch. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Oooooooooooh, not good. A low kick from Epicity lands where it shouldn't have, right in the... well, you know what he did? He kicked him in the penis. He's injured, injured bad. The referee sends both fighters to their corners and Snitch has 5 minutes to recover. He's OK now though... a thumbs up from Snitch and we're back underway with a touch of gloves.
Snitch appears to be looking for a counter takedown.
Turbo Epicity is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Snitch throws a looping left and ducks down for a takedown. He's got his arms around Epicity's waist but Epicity gets an underhook and avoids the takedown by throwing Snitch off to one side.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Snitch jabs. That one connects to the head of his opponent.
Epicity throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Epicity throws a sloppy head kick
and Snitch counters with a stiff right hand.
Epicity swings wildly with a hook that is half blocked by Snitch.
A swing and a miss from Epicity.
Snitch shoots in looking for a double leg takedown. Epicity defends it nicely.
Snitch fails with a takedown attempt.
The fight stays on the outside here - Snitch looks like he's thinking about clinching though.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Snitch bobs and weaves and throws out a fast jab that snaps Epicity's head backwards.
Snitch throws a poor cross that misses
and Snitch takes a counter punch right on the button for his troubles.
Snitch lands with a straight right. Epicity didn't see that one coming.
Epicity looks to score with a jab to the body but Snitch is just out of range.
A telegraphed right hand from Snitch misses the target.
Snitch avoids the head kick by Epicity.
Snitch misses with a looping left.

The fight moves into the clinch position.

Epicity manages to break the clinch.
A big left from Snitch misses.
Epicity ducks low and lands a nice hook to the body of his opponent.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Snitch moves in looking to clinch but Epicity pushes him off.
Epicity avoids the clinch attempt nicely.
Epicity looks like he wanted to counter with a high kick but didn't throw it.

Snitch closes the distance and gets a double leg, slamming Epicity to the mat! Epicity manages to get full guard.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Epicity has Snitch pulled in close to control his posture.
Snitch wants to control from the top but Epicity keeps moving.
Epicity not looking particularly offensive just at the moment.
Snitch controlling from the guard. I say controlling but really, he's stalling.
The crowd thankful this round is nearly over.
Snitch trying to control the position from guard on top but Epicity is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

That was a close second round but I would say that Jon Snitch will probably get the nod.
The fighters get back to their feet, the hooter sounds and we're back to the action! Let's hear some noise people - this is the final round!

Snitch lands a lovely overhand right.
Epicity slips under a jab.
Epicity misses with a hook.
Snitch with a lazy takedown attempt
and Epicity counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.
Epicity closes the distance and takes a jab right on the nose as he does so.
Snitch darts in looking for a takedown but Epicity gets double underhooks and turns Snitch into the cage.
Epicity lands a vicious shot with the stealth of a sniper and the strength of a viper. Are vipers that strong? I can think of lots of things that are stronger than a viper - not many rhyme with sniper though.
Snitch tries to clinch up but Epicity circles away and keeps his distance.
Epicity looked like he wanted to counter with a punch but didn't throw it.
Turbo Epicity seems to be getting the better of the standup.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Snitch fails to land the takedown.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Jon Snitch. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Jab from Epicity.

Snitch is rocked!

That's one minute gone in the round.
Snitch misses with a right hand
and Epicity counters with a massive hook, right on the button! He's out cold! Damn, that was naaaaaasty! Hopefully he'll be OK.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:09 of round 3, we have a winner by way of KO (Punch). Turbo Epicity!
After winning the bout, Turbo Epicity thanked all his fans and promised he'd do even better in his next fight. The crowd seemed to love his humility.
Jon Snitch was interviewed post fight and said 'This loss will make me better, I will be back.'.