PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Reinhard Galt (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Starship Pain (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Pain has chosen Decisive Battle as his entrance music. I'm sure you'll be fascinated to know that I was talking to some pointless Z list celebrity before the fight and he thought that Starship Pain was going to win. Let's see if he was right.

Galt
vs
Pain

218 cm
28
273 lbs
13 - 3 - 0

195 cm
24
279 lbs
14 - 4 - 1

BJJ Purple Belt
Dangerous knees
Granite chin

Good wrestler
World class boxer
Good gas tank

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 13 - 3 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Reinhard Galt!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 14 - 4 - 1, fighting out of Hilo, Starship Pain!
The judges for this bout are , and .

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Galt throws a series of punches but Pain moves out of range.
Pain doesn't manage to clinch there - Galt circles away.
Galt fakes a jab and throws a low kick but Pain checks it well.
Pain keeping at a good range here, avoiding a leg kick.
Pain closes the distance and clinches up with Galt, looking for a takedown. Pain pushes Galt against the cage but Galt circles to the side and manages to break the clinch.
Pain stooping low to avoid any incoming strikes and then lunges in with an uppercut come cross that lands flush.
Galt throws a head kick but Pain moves out of range.
Pain checks a leg kick nicely.
Galt takes a swing at Pain's ribcage but misses.
Galt looks to land a combination but Pain avoids it well.
Galt throws a body punch but Pain moves out of range.
Pain moves out of range as Galt strikes.
Galt takes a shot right to the liver - Bas would have been proud of that punch.
Galt lands with a thumping leg kick.
Galt throws a right hand that Pain ducks under and follows up with a left that Pain also avoids with ease.
Galt throws a sloppy head kick and Pain moves out of range easily.
Galt pushing out the jab but it's not landing.
Pain moves away from the strike by Galt.

Galt gets to the clinch - let's see what his plan is here.
A right hand to the body from Pain.
Pain working on landing some head shots here - that one got through nicely.
Good body shot from Pain.
Pain blocks an uppercut.
Pain cracks Galt with a nice body shot.
Galt is breathing heavily.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Pain lands with a left to the head.
Pain lands on the inside with an uppercut.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Galt tries a body shot but Pain blocks it.
A quick uppercut on the inside from Pain.
Pain digs a right hand into Galt's ribs. Those have got to be taking their toll on Galt's gas tank.
Pain lands a hook to the side of the head.
Nice body punch from Pain.
Pain presses Galt against the cage and delivers a mid-strength body shot.
A hook to the body from Pain.
Pain works on Galt's body with a couple of short punches.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Pain lands a hook to the body. It's hard to tell if that hurt Galt or not.
Pain lands a left hand.
A quick uppercut on the inside from Pain.
A quick uppercut on the inside from Pain.
Pain lands on the inside with an uppercut.
Pain cracks Galt with a nice body shot.

Pain gets control of Galt's arms and successfully pulls guard. Pain will no doubt be looking for submissions off his back.

Pain throwing his legs up looking for a triangle.
Galt has to be careful here, sitting in the guard of a superior BJJ player.
Pain looking to sweep here. No luck so far.

That's two minutes gone in the round.

Pain is looking for a guillotine. You can't force these things though and Galt defends well.
Pain tries to land a sweep but no joy.
Galt will need to keep those long limbs tucked in whilst he's on the ground, to prevent any submissions.

Pain throwing his legs up looking for a triangle.

That's three minutes gone in the round.

Pain is looking for a guillotine. You can't force these things though and Galt defends well.

The fighters are starting to perspire pretty heavily.
Pain is looking for a triangle but Galt pushes his legs off easily.

Pain working from the bottom, still in full guard. He's managed to get a loose triangle. Galt doesn't seem to be doing much to defend here, obviously he feels comfortable in the position. Galt manages to throw the legs off his shoulder and he's back into guard - no problem.

That's four minutes gone in the round.

Pain looking for a guillotine here but Galt defends easily.

Galt is sitting in close to Pain's body. Pain has gone for a guillotine from the bottom. Oh damn, that looks pretty tight! Galt is panicking - it looks like this one could be all over! Yes, Galt is tapping! That was a very nice submission by Pain.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 4:52 of round 1, we have a winner by way of Submission (Guillotine). Starship Pain!