PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Ionakana Lanakila (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Ron Jeremy (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Jeremy has chosen Motörhead - Killed By Death as his entrance music. On his way into the cage it seems that Ionakana Lanakila has been attacked by a crazed fan! It looks like it might have been the just bleed guy! Luckily Ionakana Lanakila seems to be OK! I thought that lunatic was in prison!?

Lanakila
vs
Jeremy

193 cm
29
268 lbs
17 - 6 - 0

167 cm
31
280 lbs
16 - 9 - 0

Good wrestling
Excellent boxer
Cardio machine

Good wrestler
World class MT
Good gas tank

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 17 - 6 - 0, fighting out of St Petersburg, Ionakana Lanakila!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 16 - 9 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Ron Jeremy!
The judges for this bout are Marco Blurström, Tarja Halkonen and Roosa Järviläinen.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Jeremy misses with a straight left.
Jeremy wants to clinch.

Jeremy darts in and clinches Lanakila up against the cage.
Lanakila wants to break free but Jeremy has control.
Jeremy lands a nice elbow.

It looks like Ionakana Lanakila has been cut.
Lanakila is trying to break the clinch but Jeremy has him pressed against the cage.
Jeremy misses with a short punch on the inside.
Jeremy misses the knee to the body. Nice hip positioning from Lanakila.
Lanakila blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Jeremy blocking some punches.
Jeremy misses with a short punch on the inside.
Jeremy lands an elbow inside.
Jeremy lands an elbow inside that Lanakila shrugs off.

Ionakana Lanakila's cut is getting worse.
Jeremy misses with an elbow over the top.
Jeremy creates a bit of space for himself and sneaks an elbow through Lanakila's defenses.

Jeez, Ionakana Lanakila's cut is really nasty now. The referee must be thinking about getting that checked.

The referee calls the doctor in to look at Ionakana Lanakila's cut. Oh no, the doctor has called an end to the bout!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:56 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Cut). Ron Jeremy!
Jumping up and down and very excited, Ron Jeremy waved his t-shirt featuring Reaper Combatwear's logo in front of the cameras.