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Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Sergei Biteyourcockov (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Tonothan Kuhula (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Kuhula is bobbing his head along to his entrance song: Native Drums from the South Pacific. Sergei Biteyourcockov could well score a knockout today. He has the power to get to Tonothan Kuhula's chin.



206 cm
20
289 lbs
2 - 0 - 0
212 cm
27
280 lbs
4 - 0 - 0
Good wrestling
Solid boxing
Big right hand
BJJ Blue Belt
Excellent boxer
Heavy handed


HGH Nutrients Q160-Q158


Just Fight (Everything 7$)


Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, for the heavyweight championship of the world!
Introducing the champion to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 2 - 0 - 0, fighting out of St Petersburg, Sergei Biteyourcockov!
And introducing the challenger to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 4 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Tonothan Kuhula!
The judges for this bout are Matti Vanhoillinen, Ben Zyskovitsi and Anni Minnemäki.




The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Biteyourcockov lands with an overhand left.


It looks like Tonothan Kuhula has been cut.
Biteyourcockov throws a series of punches but Kuhula moves out of range.
Biteyourcockov fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Kuhula manages to avoid it.
Biteyourcockov takes a shot right to the bread basket.
Kuhula misses with an uppercut
and Biteyourcockov counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.
Sloppy strikes from Biteyourcockov. Those never looked like landing.
Kuhula throws a hook to the side of Biteyourcockov's head but Biteyourcockov sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Kuhula punishes Biteyourcockov's body with a nice straight punch.
Biteyourcockov shoots in for a takedown - he's clinched up with Kuhula but Kuhula pushes him off and we're back to square one.
Kuhula takes a body punch but keeps moving.
Tonothan Kuhula seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Biteyourcockov misses with a few strikes there.
Kuhula tries to bum rush Biteyourcockov with a series of wild strikes but Biteyourcockov uses good footwork to avoid the assault.
Some wild striking there from Biteyourcockov.
Kuhula throws a jab, cross combination which is slipped
and Biteyourcockov counters with a straight right hand.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Biteyourcockov takes one on the chin but keeps coming.
Some wild striking there from Biteyourcockov.
Kuhula fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Biteyourcockov manages to avoid it.
The crowd cheers as Kuhula lands an impressive looking overhand right. Biteyourcockov doesn't seem phased though.
Kuhula swings widly with a right hand
and Biteyourcockov counters with a good right hand that lands right on the jaw.
Kuhula looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Biteyourcockov throws a series of strikes that have Kuhula backpedaling.


That has opened up Tonothan Kuhula's cut even more.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Nice body punch from Biteyourcockov.
Biteyourcockov blocks a jab.
Biteyourcockov throws a series of punches but Kuhula avoids them all with ease.
Kuhula waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Biteyourcockov.
Biteyourcockov throws an overhand right that lands on Kuhula's shoulder, as Kuhula tries to avoid the shot.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Biteyourcockov is looking to clinch but Kuhula is avoiding it.
Kuhula misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Kuhula stuffs the takedown attempt from Biteyourcockov. Biteyourcockov gets slowly back to his feet.
Kuhula displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Biteyourcockov throws out the jab.
Kuhula scores with a jab to the jaw of his opponent.
Kuhula misses with a hook.
Biteyourcockov misses with a series of wild punches.
Biteyourcockov is looking to clinch but Kuhula is avoiding it.
Some wild striking there from Kuhula.
Biteyourcockov lands a jab-cross combination.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Biteyourcockov tries to close the distance and clinch but Kuhula swats him to one side with an open hand palm strike and circles away.
Biteyourcockov misses with a wild body shot.
Tonothan Kuhula is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Kuhula swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Kuhula jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Biteyourcockov slips a straight right by Kuhula.
Kuhula throws a body punch but Biteyourcockov moves out of range.
Biteyourcockov ducks under a wild hook from Kuhula.
Kuhula works over Biteyourcockov's head and body with a nice combination.


It looks like Sergei Biteyourcockov has been cut.
Kuhula throws a combination that misses
and Biteyourcockov counters with a leg kick.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Biteyourcockov staying out of range there.
Kuhula throws a hook but Biteyourcockov blocks it.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Biteyourcockov lands a vicious shot with the stealth of a sniper and the strength of a viper. Are vipers that strong? I can think of lots of things that are stronger than a viper - not many rhyme with sniper though.


The cut above Tonothan Kuhula's eye is starting to cause him problems now.
Kuhula misses with a looping right.
Biteyourcockov misses with a body shot.
Kuhula misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Biteyourcockov.
Biteyourcockov takes a solid shot to the body. That one hurt him but he's trying not to show it.
Biteyourcockov avoids a lazy jab quite easily.
Kuhula misses with a wild body shot.
Kuhula looks to land a combination but Biteyourcockov avoids it well.
Biteyourcockov cracks Kuhula with a right hand to the side of the head.


Tonothan Kuhula's cut is absolute horrible now. This looks like something out of a horror film with blood covering both fighters.

The referee calls the doctor in to look at Tonothan Kuhula's cut. Oh no, the doctor has called an end to the bout!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 4:50 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Cut). Sergei Biteyourcockov!
Sergei Biteyourcockov is the new heavyweight champion!
Sergei Biteyourcockov tried to hype himself up post fight but didn't word it too well and it ended up with him sounding like a bit of a tool.
S C
A
G S C
B
G S C G energy
A | B
hype
A | B
pop
A | B
mgr
A | B
FIGHT
RATING
58%
 
 
 
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