PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a welterweight MMA rules bout between Pete Palahnuik (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Ice Man (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Palahnuik kept the crowd waiting but all that was forgotten when his ring entrance music started. The incomparable musical genius that is Machine Civilization. Man has chosen Shadow on the Sun as his entrance music. Ice Man has the power to score a knockout today if he connects clean with Pete Palahnuik's chin.

Palahnuik
vs
Man

184 cm
34
181 lbs
23 - 7 - 0

186 cm
36
180 lbs
38 - 14 - 0

Good wrestling
World class boxer
Insanely flexible

Good wrestler
World class boxer
Good gas tank

Affordable Quality + Reliable Laundry
Bad Man Clothing

The Big Kabosh

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, for the welterweight championship of the world!
Introducing the champion to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 23 - 7 - 0, fighting out of Rio de Janeiro, Pete Palahnuik!
And introducing the challenger to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 38 - 14 - 0, fighting out of Rio de Janeiro, Ice Man!
The judges for this bout are Thiago Cunha, Edson Gomes and Matheus Silva.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Palahnuik moves into range and lands a nice body kick.
Man with poor footwork there. He got himself in a bit of a tangle, enabling Palahnuik to score with a decent uppercut.
Palahnuik uses good footwork to get in and out, landing a nice hook.
Palahnuik lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but Man circles away quickly and effectively.
Man keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Palahnuik throws a leg kick that misses.
Palahnuik missing with a left hand there. Man was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
Palahnuik lands a leg kick and bounces back out of range.
Man on the wrong end of a nice jab.
A jab from Man misses.
Like a baseball bat into the meat of his leg there - nice leg kick by Palahnuik.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Man bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.
Palahnuik swings for the body but Man moves out of range.
Palahnuik lands with a right hand.
Palahnuik tries to land a front kick but Man steps back. That was a bit too telegraphed.
Palahnuik has been talking about how he's improved his wrestling in the run up to the fight so let's see if that's enough to sway the balance.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Palahnuik takes a shot to the body in his stride.
Palahnuik connects with a looping right hand.
Man catches Palahnuik with a nice straight right. He seems pissed - ooooh, it's on now! On like donkey kong!
Palahnuik throws a poor cross that misses
and Man counters with a straight punch to the midsection.
Palahnuik misses with a shot to the body
and Man counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Palahnuik misses the jab.
Palahnuik throws a hook but Man blocks it.
Man lands a jab to the nose.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Palahnuik throws a poor cross that misses
and Man counters with a series of strikes that practically lifts Palahnuik off his feet! He tumbles backwards, his head bouncing off the mat - Man follows up with more strikes before the ref can step in but Palahnuik was out before he hit the floor.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:45 of round 1, we have a winner by way of KO (Strikes). Ice Man!
Ice Man is the new welterweight champion!
A relieved looking Ice Man thanked the fans for their support and gave the usual line about them being amazing. They seemed to believe that he actually meant it.