PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight kickboxing rules bout between Alfred E Neuman (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Tom Thadani (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). E Neuman comes to the ring accompanied by The King of Swing. Alfred E Neuman had a look across the ring there at his opponent. He definitely means business

E Neuman
vs
Thadani

225 cm
27
291 lbs
14 - 6 - 1

188 cm
27
193 lbs
9 - 1 - 1

World class MT
Granite chin

World class MT
Good gas tank

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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, for the super heavyweight championship of the world!
Introducing the champion to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 14 - 6 - 1, fighting out of Amsterdam, Alfred E Neuman!
And introducing the challenger to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 9 - 1 - 1, fighting out of St Petersburg, Tom Thadani!
The judges for this bout are Radbod Blank, Paul Aken and Patrick Alders.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Thadani uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from E Neuman.
Thadani moves out of range as E Neuman throws a body kick.
Thadani clobbers E Neuman with an overhand right that has the crowd gasping. That made a horrendous noise.
A telegraphed right hand from E Neuman misses the target.
E Neuman throws a hook to the side of Thadani's head but Thadani sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
Thadani throws a front kick aimed at E Neuman's knee but E Neuman avoids it well.
Thadani throws a body kick but he wasn't in range.
E Neuman fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Thadani manages to avoid it.
Thadani throws a sloppy head kick and E Neuman moves out of range easily.
E Neuman ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Thadani moves away.
Thadani tries to land a leg kick but E Neuman saw it coming and moves away.
E Neuman looks to have improved his striking defense since last time we saw him fight.
Thadani uses good head movement to avoid the hook from E Neuman.
A head kick misses from E Neuman.
E Neuman lands a nice looking body shot.
E Neuman throws a low kick, looking for Thadani's leg but Thadani calmly moves out of range.

That's one minute gone in the round.
A nice inside leg kick there by E Neuman. That's going to slow Thadani down.
E Neuman thuds a mid kick into his opponent's body. That will wear on Thadani if he has to take too many more of those.
Nice defenses there by E Neuman.
Thadani throws a body kick but he was well out of range there.
E Neuman throws a series of punches but Thadani avoids them all with ease.
E Neuman waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Thadani.
E Neuman throws a lazy uppercut
and Thadani counters with a head kick. That will keep E Neuman thinking before he tries any more sloppy attacks!
A swing and a miss from E Neuman.
Alfred E Neuman seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
A solid leg kick lands there for E Neuman.
A slapping leg kick lands for E Neuman.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Thadani on the receiving end of a decent leg kick there by E Neuman. E Neuman obviously looking to wear him down.
E Neuman misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
E Neuman cracks a nice hook into Thadani's ribs.
E Neuman lands a body shot.
Thadani pulls out of a head kick attempt.
E Neuman throws a jab but it's blocked by Thadani.
E Neuman connects with a right hand. Thadani shakes it off.
Thadani throws a low kick but it's checked well by E Neuman.
E Neuman misses with a low kick.
E Neuman throws a body kick, spinning off balance
and Thadani counters with a solid body kick.
A kick lands to the mid section there for Thadani.
E Neuman thows a left - swing and a miss!
E Neuman misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
E Neuman throws the kick towards the body but Thadani avoids it.
Thadani avoids a lazy jab quite easily.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
E Neuman looks to score with a jab to the body but Thadani is just out of range.
E Neuman misses with a body shot
and Thadani finishes the little exchange by landing a big kick to the body.
E Neuman throws a right hand that misses
and Thadani counters with a nice leg kick.
E Neuman throws a sloppy body shot
and he gets countered with a snapping leg kick.
E Neuman swings and misses with a shot to the body
and Thadani counters with a nice kick to the body.
E Neuman is breathing heavily.
Good standup being displayed there by E Neuman as he connects with a hook.
Thud! ouch! good body kick from Thadani - that will leave a mark!
A swing and a miss from E Neuman.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
E Neuman tries to bum rush Thadani with a series of wild strikes but Thadani uses good footwork to avoid the assault.
E Neuman checks a low kick from Thadani.
Thadani moves into range and lands a nice leg kick.
A slow jab from E Neuman misses its intended target.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
E Neuman misses with a looping left.
E Neuman moves out of range of the body kick from Thadani.
A big right from E Neuman misses.
Thadani takes one to the chin there.
E Neuman misses with an uppercut. Thadani saw that one coming.
E Neuman throws out a token jab with nothing on it.
Thadani slips under a jab.
E Neuman looks to land a left hand but Thadani moved out of range nicely.
Thadani throws a half hearted mid kick.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Good work by Thadani as he checks the leg kick.
E Neuman throws a body punch but Thadani moves out of range.
E Neuman ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Thadani moves away.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Alfred E Neuman dominated that round.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action!

Thadani keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from E Neuman.
A jab from E Neuman misses.
E Neuman throws a leg kick
and Thadani counters with a low kick, right behind E Neuman 's knee.
E Neuman lands a pitter patter jab to the forehead of his opponent.
E Neuman misses with a hook.
Thadani looks shocked there as he takes a right hand to the temple.
Good work by E Neuman as he checks the leg kick.
E Neuman checks the leg kick nicely there.
Thadani misses with a leg kick.
E Neuman moving in and out of range nicely, whilst landing the scoring shot.

Thadani is rocked!
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
E Neuman throws a sloppy body shot
and he gets countered with a snapping leg kick.
E Neuman checks a leg kick.
E Neuman misses with a straight right.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Thadani walks forward and throws out a flicking leg kick. E Neuman checks it nicely though, as he moves to the side.
E Neuman throws a jab but it's blocked by Thadani.
Alfred E Neuman is winning the standup battle so far.
E Neuman misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Thadani.
E Neuman throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Thadani.
Thadani slips under a jab.
Thadani tries a head kick but it misses.
E Neuman throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
E Neuman jabbing away but nothing is landing.
E Neuman cracks a nice hook into Thadani's ribs.
Thadani looking to throw a kick but he's pulled out of it.
E Neuman throws an uppercut from half a mile away. Thadani sees it coming and avoids it easily.
E Neuman is using his reach advantage well here, landing the more effective single shots from range.
Thadani will need to close the distance a bit before he attacks - that leg kick was thrown from too far away.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
E Neuman lands with a cross.

Thadani forces E Neuman back against the ropes and clinches.
E Neuman tries to circle away but Thadani has him pinned against the ropes.
Thadani avoids the elbow strike from E Neuman, against the ropes.
The referee is keeping an eye on Thadani - much more stalling and he will separate the fighters.
Thadani takes an elbow to the temple.
E Neuman tries to throw a body punch but Thadani avoids it by throwing E Neuman back against the ropes.
This has been an exciting period of action!
E Neuman is trying to force a seperation but Thadani has the dominant position.
E Neuman gets an overhook and lands an elbow to the side of the head.
E Neuman is trying to maintain a safe position but Thadani gets an underhook and turns E Neuman into the ropes.
E Neuman managing to block the knees to the body from Thadani.
With the two fighters working up against the ropes, Thadani just misses with a elbow thrown towards E Neuman's brow.
E Neuman blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
E Neuman misses with a hook to the ribs.
Thadani trying to land knees to the body.
E Neuman throws a nice elbow but it doesn't land.
Thadani tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
E Neuman tries a body shot but Thadani blocks it.
E Neuman looking to slow down the pace here.
E Neuman managing to block the knees to the body from Thadani.
Thadani misses with a knee strike.
E Neuman throws an elbow but it's blocked.
E Neuman just leaning against Thadani, taking a breather.
E Neuman stalling in the clinch but Thadani improves position.
Thadani lands an elbow inside that E Neuman shrugs off.
With the fighters up against the ropes, E Neuman throws an elbow but misses.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
E Neuman is trying to slow down the pace in the clinch, to catch his breath.
Thadani tries to land a knee to the head but E Neuman blocks with his arms.
E Neuman landing knees to the body.
E Neuman looking to stall.
E Neuman doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Thadani is working hard here but doesn't seem to be able to control effectively, up against the ropes.
E Neuman wants to stall.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
E Neuman tries to land a knee to the body but he is off balance and Thadani avoids it.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
E Neuman pushes Thadani back against the ropes and lands a hook to the side of the head.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Alfred E Neuman dominated that second round.
The corners get their ten second warning. Both fighters stand from their stools and stare eachother down, ready to get back to the action.

E Neuman tries to land a leg kick but Thadani saw it coming and moves away.
Nice defenses there by Thadani.
Thadani lands a leg kick that knocks E Neuman off balance momentarily.
Thadani misses with an attempted mid kick.
E Neuman uses good footwork to get in and out and land a nice right hand before Thadani has time to react.
Thadani's jab looks to have found its range, popping E Neuman under the eye.
Thadani throws a sloppy head kick and E Neuman moves out of range easily.
Thadani's hands are dropping dangerously low here and E Neuman connects clean with a right hook that sends him down to one knee! Thadani scrambles back to his feet.
Thadani moves out of range as E Neuman strikes.
Thadani thuds his shin into the meat of E Neuman's side.
E Neuman wants to land a leg kick but Thadani is out of range.
A jab from Thadani finds it's way through E Neuman's defenses.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Thadani throws a head kick that misses.
E Neuman throws a poor cross that misses
and Thadani counters with a nice low kick that buckles E Neuman's knee momentarily.
Thadani throws a wild body kick that E Neuman sees coming a mile off.
E Neuman lands a nice looking kick to the body. Thadani takes a step back to recover.
E Neuman misses with a right hand
and Thadani counters with a good low kick that E Neuman was not able to check.
Thadani tries to clinch up.
E Neuman fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Thadani manages to avoid it.
E Neuman throws a hook but Thadani avoids it easily.
Thadani slips a jab from E Neuman.
E Neuman just misses with a punch to the body.
E Neuman will be looking to protect his midsection after taking some solid kicks to the body.
E Neuman looks to score with a jab to the body but Thadani is just out of range.
E Neuman throws a body kick that digs right into the meat.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
E Neuman cracks Thadani with a nice right hand that draws applause from the crowd.
Thadani feints with a shoulder and throws a nice leg kick to E Neuman's calf.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
E Neuman tries a head kick but it misses.
E Neuman bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.
Thadani connects with a solid leg kick.
E Neuman throws a body punch but Thadani moves out of range.
Thadani throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
E Neuman throws a lazy head kick
and Thadani counters with an inside leg kick.
A thudding body kick lands there by Thadani!
Both fighters are breathing heavily.
Thadani moves away from the strike by E Neuman.
E Neuman thows a leg kick but Thadani checks it
and he gets countered with a snapping leg kick.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
E Neuman throws out a token jab with nothing on it.
E Neuman misses with an attempted mid kick.
Thadani throws a head kick that misses.
Thadani ducks under an overhand right and circles away with a smile on his face.
E Neuman ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Thadani moves away.
E Neuman swings away with a body shot that misses
and Thadani counters with a low kick, right behind E Neuman 's knee.
Thadani throws a quick inside leg kick.
Thadani throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
E Neuman has a nice red mark on his side after a thudding body kick by Thadani.
Thadani moves away from the strike by E Neuman.
E Neuman attempts a leg kick but it's missed by a good margin.
E Neuman slips a straight right by Thadani.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Thadani avoids a punch combination nicely.
Thadani pivots as if he's going to throw a leg kick but stops half way.
E Neuman bobs and weaves and unloads with a good uppercut.
Thadani turns his hip over beautifully as he lands a nice leg kick.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Thadani lands a leg kick. The shin dug right into the meat of the thigh.
Thadani lands a nice shot that snaps E Neuman's head back.
Thadani throws a sloppy head kick and E Neuman moves out of range easily.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
E Neuman misses with a right hand
and Thadani counters with a low kick, right behind E Neuman 's knee.
E Neuman takes a thudding leg kick, right into the meat of the thigh.
Thadani throws a sloppy head kick and E Neuman moves out of range easily.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

A close third round but Tom Thadani just about did enough to take it.
That's time! Back to the action!

E Neuman keeps Thadani at a distance using the push kick.
Thadani slips a jab from E Neuman.
E Neuman lands the left hand.
Thadani blocks a head kick by E Neuman.
Thadani uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from E Neuman.
A punch lands to the side of Thadani 's head but he takes it in his stride.
A jab from E Neuman misses.
E Neuman is hobbling a little on that front leg after taking quite a few leg kicks so far in this fight.
E Neuman blocks the body kick.
E Neuman throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
A slapping leg kick lands for E Neuman.
E Neuman throws a front kick aimed at Thadani's knee but Thadani avoids it well.
Thadani misses with a kick to the body.

That's one minute gone in the round.
E Neuman lands with a nice low kick. That'll leave a bruise.
E Neuman throws a lazy uppercut
and Thadani makes the exchange count by landing a cracking kick to the body. E Neuman really felt that one!
E Neuman lands a beauty of a right hand that gets the crowd cheering.
Thadani swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
A left lands for Thadani.
The fighters circling - E Neuman throws out the jab but it was never going to land.
E Neuman throws a poor cross that misses
and Thadani counters with a head kick. That will keep E Neuman thinking before he tries any more sloppy attacks!
E Neuman listening to his corner there, landing a nice uppercut.
E Neuman connects with a hook to the side of his opponent's head.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Thadani throws a body kick that misses.
Thadani takes a step back and watches a body kick go sailing past his mid section.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Thadani tries to clinch but is not successful on this occasion.
E Neuman throws a head kick that misses.
E Neuman avoids the head kick by Thadani.
Thadani goes for a spinning back kick but it misses.
E Neuman just misses with a punch to the body.
E Neuman pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Thadani keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
E Neuman looks to land a combination but Thadani avoids it well.
Thadani throws a leg kick
and Thadani takes a counter punch right on the button for his troubles.
E Neuman throws a leg kick that is checked
and Thadani counters with a nice low kick that buckles E Neuman's knee momentarily.
Thadani attempts a leg kick but it's missed by a good margin.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
E Neuman misses with a wild body shot.
E Neuman throws a sloppy head kick and Thadani moves out of range easily.
Thadani avoids the body shot from E Neuman.
E Neuman stooping low to avoid any incoming strikes and then lunges in with an uppercut come cross that lands flush.
A low kick from E Neuman misses
and Thadani makes the exchange count by landing a cracking kick to the body. E Neuman really felt that one!
It's got to the stage where if one of these guys blows hard enough, the other might fall over.
A shot to the body from E Neuman misses
and Thadani counters with a nice low kick that buckles E Neuman's knee momentarily.
A slow jab from E Neuman misses its intended target.
Thadani pushes E Neuman away with a front kick.
A jab from E Neuman misses.
E Neuman scores with a shot to the body.
Thadani lands a nice leg kick that just misses E Neuman's sensitive parts.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
E Neuman thows a body shot but no joy.
Thadani misses with an uppercut. E Neuman saw that one coming.
E Neuman misses with a body shot
and Thadani counters with a nice leg kick.
E Neuman just misses with a punch to the body.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Thadani fakes a couple of low kicks, before throwing one on the third attempt. It connects and E Neuman has to reset his feet before getting ready to engage.
E Neuman tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Thadani was well out of range. Poor timing from E Neuman.
E Neuman circles away from the clinch attempt.
Thadani tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
E Neuman fakes with a right hand and throws a good leg kick, right into the thigh. That had to hurt Thadani.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
Thadani pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Thadani misses with an attempted mid kick.
E Neuman throws a big shot that misses.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Alfred E Neuman had his way with Tom Thadani in that round.
That's time! E Neuman's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight. So, we enter the final round. Let's see if either fighter can bring us a finish, or whether we're going to the judges scorecards.

A low kick from E Neuman is predictable there
and Thadani counters with a body kick that brings a smile to the face of both fighters.
Thadani misses with a leg kick.
Thadani throws a wild body kick that E Neuman sees coming a mile off.
Thadani looking to throw a kick but he's pulled out of it.
E Neuman swings for the body but Thadani moves out of range.
Thadani takes a body kick right on the floating rib. Ouchie.
E Neuman swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Thadani tries to move into range but E Neuman moves to the side and lands with a nice right hand.
E Neuman throws an off balance right hand
and Thadani counters with a thumping low kick.
E Neuman throws a leg kick but Thadani sees it coming and moves out of range.
Thadani looks for the body kick but E Neuman saw that one coming.
Thadani checks a low kick from E Neuman.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Thadani misses with a straight right.
Both fighters circling a little - Thadani finishes the exchange with a kick to the body.
Thadani missing with a left hand there. E Neuman was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
E Neuman misses with a wild body shot.
E Neuman blocks a head kick by Thadani.
Thadani moves out of range of the body kick from E Neuman.
E Neuman smiles there as he lands a nice right hand right on the button.
E Neuman throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
E Neuman with a nice cross.
Thadani throws a body kick but he wasn't in range.
Thadani misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Thadani avoids a lazy jab quite easily.
Thadani misses with a body kick.
E Neuman tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
E Neuman keeping at a good range here, avoiding a leg kick.
E Neuman throws a jab when Thadani was well out of range.
Thadani pulls out of a head kick attempt.
E Neuman is the aggressor but that punch slipped nicely by Thadani.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Thadani checks a leg kick.
Tom Thadani has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Thadani throws a head kick but E Neuman moves out of range.
E Neuman misses the shot to the body.
E Neuman swings for the body but Thadani moves out of range.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Oooooooooooh, not good. A low kick from E Neuman lands where it shouldn't have, right in the... well, you know what he did? He kicked him in the penis. He's injured, injured bad. The referee sends both fighters to their corners and Thadani has 5 minutes to recover. He's OK now though... a thumbs up from Thadani and we're back underway with a touch of gloves.
E Neuman scores with a slapping inside leg kick.
E Neuman throws a low kick, looking for Thadani's leg but Thadani calmly moves out of range.
Thadani has a pretty nasty looking mouse under his right eye.
E Neuman throws a series of strikes that have Thadani backpedaling.
E Neuman misses with a double jab
and Thadani counters with a low kick, right behind E Neuman 's knee.
Both of our modern day gladiators look out of it here - a gruelling 5 rounds of action taking it's toll on them, no doubt.
Thadani thuds his shin into the meat of E Neuman's side.
E Neuman throws the left hand but Thadani avoids the punch easily.
A good leg kick by Thadani.
E Neuman throws a lazy right hand but Thadani sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
E Neuman scores with a jab to the body.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Thadani displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as E Neuman throws out the jab.
E Neuman misses with a looping right.
Thadani bobs and weaves and then throws a good body kick.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
E Neuman comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range.
E Neuman throws a poor cross that misses
and he gets countered with a snapping leg kick.
Alfred E Neuman is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
E Neuman takes a step back and watches a body kick go sailing past his mid section.
E Neuman throws an uppercut from half a mile away. Thadani sees it coming and avoids it easily.
E Neuman thows a left - swing and a miss!
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
E Neuman misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Thadani.
A looping hook to the body misses from E Neuman. Thadani does a little dance to reset his feet.
Thadani misses with a body kick.

And that's the end of the fight!
Alfred E Neuman showed his dominance in that final round.
Well E Neuman has outscored his opponent in every aspect of the fight today. Only a scarily incompetent judge or two will keep him from a well deserved win... Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 5 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Radbod Blank scores the fight 49:46
Judge Paul Aken scores the fight 49:46
Judge Patrick Alders scores the fight 49:46

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Alfred E Neuman!
Alfred E Neuman is the new super heavyweight champion!
An out of breath and clearly excited Alfred E Neuman thanked HGH Nutrients Q160 Tycoons Best Quality supps for their help and support (and free stuff they sent him).