PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Adam Carolla (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Ze Minotauro (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Carolla comes into the arena with Gotta Get It On from Taboo 2 blaring out of the sound system. Minotauro has chosen Buckethead - jump man as his entrance music. Buckle up people - heeeeeeeeeere we go!

Carolla
vs
Minotauro

198 cm
44
201 lbs
49 - 45 - 0

185 cm
42
253 lbs
33 - 23 - 1

Good wrestling
World class boxer
Cardio machine

Good wrestler
World class boxer
Powerful

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 49 - 45 - 0, fighting out of Rio de Janeiro, Adam Carolla!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 33 - 23 - 1, fighting out of Rio de Janeiro, Ze Minotauro!
The judges for this bout are Emerson Jorge, Paulo Santos and Daniel Cesar.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Minotauro lands with a thumping leg kick.
Adam Carolla seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Minotauro swings for the body but Carolla moves out of range.
Carolla lands a really nice looking cross but Minotauro seems unphased.
Carolla throws a hook to the side of Minotauro's head but Minotauro sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
Carolla has been talking about how he's improved his wrestling in the run up to the fight so let's see if that's enough to sway the balance.
Carolla checks the leg kick.
Minotauro needs to keep his hands up - Carolla had a free shot at his head there.
Carolla throws a big shot that misses.
Minotauro takes a shot right to the bread basket.
Carolla lands a leg kick. The shin dug right into the meat of the thigh.
A clash of legs there as Minotauro blocks the low kick.
Carolla keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Minotauro.
Minotauro takes a solid shot to the body. That one hurt him but he's trying not to show it.
Carolla moves out of range as Minotauro strikes.
Carolla clobbers Minotauro with an overhand right that has the crowd gasping. That made a horrendous noise.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Minotauro moves in looking to clinch but Carolla pushes him off.
Decent striking displayed by Carolla there.
Carolla is using his height advantage well here, landing a good percentage of his punches.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Carolla swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.
Minotauro uses good head movement to avoid the hook from Carolla.
Carolla throws a right hand that misses
and Minotauro counters with a body kick that brings a smile to the face of both fighters.

Oooooh!!! Minotauro has knocked Carolla down with a huge combo! Minotauro steps away and waves a wobbly Carolla back to his feet! This one might not go much longer!

It looks like Adam Carolla has been cut.
Minotauro throws the left hand but Carolla avoids the punch easily.
Minotauro tries to work over Carolla's front leg with a kick but Carolla checks it.
Carolla wings a very wild body shot but it does the job and lands to the midsection.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Carolla throws a right and a left that both miss.
Minotauro moves out of range of the strikes.
A jab from Carolla finds it's way through Minotauro's defenses.
Carolla comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range.
We've been informed that Minotauro has been sparring a lot of Muay Thai in the buildup to this fight so let's see if that has an impact on the result.
Carolla takes a step towards his opponent and connects with a left hand, before circling away.
Carolla throws a good cross that connects.
Minotauro pulls out of a head kick attempt.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Minotauro moves into range and connects with a jab.
Minotauro walks into a jab.
Carolla is using his reach advantage well here, landing the more effective single shots from range.
Carolla fakes a jab and then connects with a hook.
Minotauro misses with a hook.
Carolla wants to clinch up but Minotauro keeps it at a distance.
Carolla throws an ugly left hook that misses
enabling Minotauro to counter with a crisp jab.
Carolla ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Minotauro moves away.
Carolla lands with a slapping head kick.
Carolla tries to clinch up.
Minotauro moves forwards but Carolla connects with a nice, crisp jab.
Carolla jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Carolla clobbers Minotauro with an overhand right that has the crowd gasping. That made a horrendous noise.
Minotauro missing with a left hand there. Carolla was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Carolla tries to clinch
and Minotauro counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Minotauro tries to move into range but Carolla moves to the side and lands with a nice right hand.
Carolla throws a front kick that sends Minotauro stumbling back into the cage.
Carolla misses with an uppercut. Minotauro saw that one coming.
Minotauro has a nice red mark on his side after a thudding body kick by Carolla.
Minotauro misses with a head kick.
Minotauro steps to the side to avoid the strikes from Carolla.
Ze Minotauro is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Minotauro is on the wrong end of a nice combination from Carolla.

Carolla closes the distance and clinches.
Minotauro lands with a short head shot on the inside.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Minotauro has Carolla pressed against the cage, preventing Carolla from circling away and getting back to striking at range.
Minotauro softening up his opponent with strikes, against the cage.
Minotauro tries to stall but Carolla uses the opportunity to gain a better position.
Carolla blocks a punch to the side of the head.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Minotauro throws a punch but it's blocked by Carolla.
Minotauro swings away with an uppercut that misses.
With the fighters up against the cage, Minotauro throws an elbow but misses.
Minotauro lands with a right to the head.

Carolla pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat.
Minotauro throws a lazy right hand but Carolla sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
Minotauro misses with the combination.
Carolla rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Minotauro moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Carolla works his jab well there, keeping his opponent at a distance.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Minotauro shakes his hands off, looking to compose himself, but takes a jab to the jaw whilst he does it.
Minotauro rushes in with a sloppy looking punch
and Carolla counters with a left to the body.
Jab, cross, leg kick. Nice combination by Carolla!
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Adam Carolla dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Adam Carolla's cut.
The minute break is over - no more time for sponges and pep talks - back to the action!

Minotauro misses with a low kick.
Carolla scores with a slapping inside leg kick.
Minotauro takes a shot to the eye socket. That's gotta hurt.
Minotauro tries to land a front kick but Carolla steps back. That was a bit too telegraphed.
Minotauro scores with a punch to the head.
Minotauro on the wrong end of a nice hook.
Carolla lands a leg kick and bounces back out of range.
Carolla throws a right and a left that Minotauro avoids nicely.
Carolla throws a nice looking combination but Minotauro bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Carolla misses with a series of wild punches.
Minotauro moves out of range as Carolla strikes.
Minotauro takes a body punch that cleary hurt but he's trying not to show any weakness.
Carolla misses with a double jab.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Carolla jabs at Minotauro's body.
Carolla wants to clinch up but Minotauro keeps it at a distance.
A lazy left from Carolla finds it's target.
Minotauro keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Carolla.
Minotauro misses with a leg kick.
Minotauro fakes a couple of low kicks, before throwing one on the third attempt. It connects and Carolla has to reset his feet before getting ready to engage.
A jab from Minotauro misses.
Adam Carolla is winning the standup battle so far.
Carolla wings a very wild body shot but it does the job and lands to the midsection.
Minotauro throws a shot from downtown. Carolla moves away and avoids it.

Carolla takes the fight into the clinch.
Carolla has dropped down and is looking to force the takedown but it's defended by Minotauro after a bit of a struggle.

Carolla breaks the clinch.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Minotauro is pinned up against the cage taking some big shots here. The referee is looking closely deciding whether he should stop the fight.
Carolla cracks Minotauro with a right hand to the side of the head.
Carolla buckles his opponent's knee momentarily with a nice leg kick.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Minotauro fails in his attempt to clinch.
Carolla connects with a body shot that sends Minotauro's belly button to the back.
A decent looking cross lands there for Carolla.
Carolla goes to the watering hole and comes back with a big thumbs up from the judges as he scores a three punch combo.
Minotauro throws a leg kick but Carolla sees it coming and checks it nicely.
Carolla with a hook.
Carolla takes a step towards his opponent and connects with a left hand, before circling away.
Minotauro takes a shot to the body in his stride.
Carolla lands with a right hand.
Carolla getting the better of the striking in that exchange.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Some wild striking there from Carolla.
Carolla moves into range and throws a lovely three punch combination.
Carolla misses the jab.
Carolla is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Minotauro can do to turn this around?
Carolla moves out of range of the leg kick from Minotauro.
Carolla tries to clinch up.
Carolla lands with a shot to the body.
Minotauro is pinned up against the cage taking some big shots here. The referee is looking closely deciding whether he should stop the fight.
Minotauro takes a body punch that cleary hurt but he's trying not to show any weakness.
Jab from Carolla.
Carolla fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
A left and a right from Carolla both land. Nice combination.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Carolla lands a beauty of a right hand that gets the crowd cheering.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Minotauro throws a body shot but no joy.
Carolla throws a hook to the side of Minotauro's head but Minotauro sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
Minotauro walks into a straight right hand from Carolla.
Jab, jab by Carolla - just one landing.
A punch lands to the side of Minotauro 's head but he takes it in his stride.
Carolla cracks Minotauro with an open hand slap.
Minotauro has a pretty nasty looking mouse under his right eye.
Carolla throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Carolla misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
That kick from Carolla tenderised Minotauro's leg. Minotauro is trying to keep his angry face on.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Minotauro slips a straight right by Carolla.
Carolla tries a head kick but it misses.
Minotauro keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Carolla.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Adam Carolla dominated that second round.
The cut man is working on Adam Carolla's cut.
The minute break is over - no more time for sponges and pep talks - back to the action! This is the final round!

Carolla comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range.
Good standup being displayed there by Carolla as he connects with a hook.
A jab from Carolla finds it's way through Minotauro's defenses.
Carolla misses the shot to the body.
Minotauro looking to land some kicks to the body here.
Carolla uses good footwork to get in and out, landing a nice hook.
Nice defenses there by Carolla.
Minotauro avoids a punch combination nicely.
No luck for Carolla with that takedown attempt.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Minotauro takes a jab on the nose there. A little bit of blood seems to be coming out. Hopefully that won't affect his breathing.
Carolla lands a nice leg kick that just misses Minotauro's sensitive parts.
Some bone on bone action there as Carolla checks a low kick. Luckily it wasn't a particularly hard one.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Good leg kick by Minotauro there. It's the ones that make that thud noise that hurt and that was an almighty thud.
Carolla throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Minotauro misses with a head kick.
Minotauro misses with a looping right.
Carolla lands a lovely overhand right.
Carolla throws a right hand that Minotauro ducks under and follows up with a left that Minotauro also avoids with ease.
Minotauro throws a nice hook to the body that draws an oooh from the crowd.
Carolla digs a good body shot into Minotauro's ribs.

Carolla gets in close and instigates a clinch.

Carolla manages to break the clinch.
Minotauro walks into a jab.
Minotauro rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Carolla moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Ze Minotauro has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Minotauro throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Carolla pushes forward with a 1-2 combination that forces Minotauro back to the cage. Carolla follows up with a solid lead hook to the liver.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Carolla rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Minotauro moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Carolla tries to bum rush Minotauro with a series of wild strikes but Minotauro uses good footwork to avoid the assault.
Minotauro fakes a jab and throws a low kick but Carolla checks it well.
Adam Carolla is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
Minotauro fakes low and throws an overhand right that catches Carolla on the side of the head.

Minotauro drives through and clinches with Carolla against the cage.
A head punch on the inside from Minotauro fails to land.

Carolla breaks from the clinch.
Carolla takes a step towards his opponent and connects with a left hand, before circling away.
Carolla lands with a hook. Minotauro tried to avoid it but it clipped the top of his head.
Minotauro throws a leg kick but Carolla moved away.
Minotauro walks into a left hand.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Carolla misses with a wild body shot.
Minotauro takes a body punch but keeps moving.
Minotauro throws a leg kick that is checked
and Carolla counters with a stiff right hand.
A jab lands there for Carolla.
Minotauro on the wrong end of a vicious looking body shot.
Carolla bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.
Carolla scores with a hook.
Carolla lands three nice shots there - that looked like it hurt!
Carolla smiles there as he lands a nice right hand right on the button.
Jab from Carolla.
Minotauro tries to move into range but Carolla moves to the side and lands with a nice right hand.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Carolla lands a jab to the nose.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Minotauro moves forwards but Carolla connects with a nice, crisp jab.
Minotauro looks to land a left hand but Carolla moved out of range nicely.
Carolla lands a nice looking body kick.
Carolla looks to land a combination but Minotauro avoids it well.
Carolla shuffles to his left behind two crisp jabs. Minotauro eats them both and turns towards Carolla to reposition himself and eats a stinging right hand-left hook combo.
Minotauro throws a jab when Carolla was well out of range.
A good leg kick by Carolla.
Carolla uses good footwork to get in and out, landing a nice hook.
Carolla connects with a hook to the side of his opponent's head.
Carolla needs to keep his hands up - Minotauro had a free shot at his head there.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Carolla lands with a hook. Minotauro tried to avoid it but it clipped the top of his head.
Carolla takes a jab on the nose there. A little bit of blood seems to be coming out. Hopefully that won't affect his breathing.
Nice defenses there by Carolla.

And that's the end of the fight!
Adam Carolla showed his dominance in that final round.
Well I reckon that's a shut out for Carolla, winning every round. Will the judges agree? They are the ones who matter, even if they are often depressingly incompetent. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Emerson Jorge scores the fight 30:27
Judge Paulo Santos scores the fight 30:27
Judge Daniel Cesar scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Adam Carolla!
A victorious Adam Carolla thanked his army of followers in his post fight interview, telling people to make sure they follow him on Twitter.