PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between Great Teacher Onizuka (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Soylent Grimm (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Rumors backstage are that the fighters have been paid to keep it standing but we know that would never happen in MMA!

Teacher Onizuka
vs
Grimm

194 cm
36
217 lbs
24 - 15 - 0

190 cm
28
215 lbs
4 - 0 - 0

Abu Dhabi Champ
World class boxer
Insanely flexible

BJJ Red Belt
Excellent boxer
Good gas tank

GREEN!160

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the light heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 24 - 15 - 0, fighting out of London, Great Teacher Onizuka!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 4 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Soylent Grimm!
The judges for this bout are Jack Bonds, and Frank Antenori.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Onizuka throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Grimm throws a hook but Onizuka blocks it.
Onizuka half commits to a counter takedown before pushing away, out of range.
Grimm lands a right hook to the body.
Grimm dips down and scores with a jab to the body.
Onizuka tries a head kick but it misses.
Grimm lands a jab to Onizuka's midsection.
Onizuka looks to score with a jab to the body but Grimm is just out of range.
Onizuka throws a leg kick but Grimm moved away.
Grimm swings for the body but Onizuka moves out of range.
Onizuka tries to counter with a takedown but Grimm is quick to defend against it.
Grimm throws a hook to the side of Onizuka's head but Onizuka sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
Onizuka looks to throw the jab but Grimm is out of range.
Onizuka takes a shot to the nose. Hopefully that hasn't broken it.
Onizuka throws a decent looking leg kick but it doesn't land clean.
Onizuka takes a shot right to the bread basket.
Grimm jabs Onizuka to the body, keeping him at a distance.
Onizuka throws an overhand right that lands on Grimm's shoulder, as Grimm tries to avoid the shot.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Grimm digs a good hook to Onizuka's body.
Grimm drops his hands momentarily and Onizuka takes advantage with a crisp shot to the head.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Onizuka tries to clinch but is not successful on this occasion.
Onizuka works his jab well there, keeping his opponent at a distance.
Onizuka wants to clinch up but Grimm keeps it at a distance.
Onizuka throws a head kick but Grimm moves out of range.
Grimm slips under a jab from Onizuka.
And Grimm tries to counter it with a takedown but Onizuka pushes his down on his head and steps out.
Soylent Grimm seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Grimm looks to land a right hand but Onizuka moved out of range.
Grimm misses with a jab to the body

and Onizuka counters with a single leg into guard. Grimm didn't expect that.
Grimm wants to sweep here but Onizuka controlling him for the moment.
Grimm is still trying to improve position.
Grimm keeps trying to improve his position.
Onizuka with a flurry of punches that miss.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Grimm tries to land a sweep but no joy.

Onizuka avoids a guillotine attempt easily.
Onizuka connects with a couple of short punches.
Onizuka is working Grimm over from the guard. He should look to pass the guard and do a little more damage with these strikes.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.

Grimm looking for a guillotine here but Onizuka defends easily.
Onizuka makes a bit of distance and scores with some ground and pound, still in guard.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Onizuka stopping the sweep attempt from Grimm.
A big thud reverberates around the arena there as Onizuka accidentally thumps the mat. Hopefully he's not broken his hand.
Grimm is trying to control the position from the bottom.
Onizuka scoring with punches to the head and body.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Onizuka is in close to Grimm's body, working some short punches and elbows.
Onizuka with a flurry of punches that miss.
Onizuka working in close now, lands a nice elbow to the side of Grimm's head.
Onizuka throws a strike but Grimm rolls with it and manages to sweep. Now he's in guard on top.

Grimm wants to control from the top but Onizuka keeps moving.
Onizuka has a closed guard, preventing anything of note from happening. Perhaps he's looking to stall.
Grimm postures up.
Grimm scoring with punches to the head and body.

Onizuka has an active guard here but Grimm has managed to pass into half guard.
Grimm landing with strikes to the body and head, softening up his opponent.

That's four minutes gone in the round.

Onizuka looking for submissions off his back.
Onizuka is looking to improve his position.

Onizuka is looking to sinch up a guillotine here but Grimm pulls his head out easily.
Grimm slips a nice elbow through Onizuka's hands, connecting with Onizuka's forehead.
Onizuka has hold of Grimm's hands but Grimm slips his arm to the side and lands an elbow.
Onizuka is looking for a sweep. Grimm is wise to his cunning plan and keeps the top position.
Onizuka is trying to defend against the ground and pound but Grimm scores with a couple of nice shots.
My spies in Ryōzanpaku Dojo inform me that Grimm has been getting involved in the gym's BJJ sparring sessions. Let's see whether that pays dividends!
Grimm is looking to pass the guard... He's managed it - he's now in full mount!
Onizuka tries to lock up and control but Grimm gives him a forearm to the face and pushes him away.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

A close round but Soylent Grimm will probably get the nod.
That's time! Onizuka's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight.

Onizuka avoids a lazy jab quite easily.
Grimm is throwing a lot of body shots here, looking to wear down Onizuka rather than just go for the knockout.
Onizuka tries to clinch up.
Grimm bobbing and weaving, closes the distance and lands a hook to the side of Onizuka's head.
Onizuka closes the distance and takes a jab right on the nose as he does so.
Onizuka wants to land a leg kick but Grimm is out of range.
Onizuka keeps the fight standing with a nice sprawl.
Grimm fails to land with a series of punches.
Soylent Grimm seems to be getting the better of the standup.

Onizuka instigates a clinch.
Onizuka throws a punch but it's blocked by Grimm.

Grimm breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
Grimm misses with a hook.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Grimm scores with a jab to the body.
Grimm circles away from the clinch attempt.
Onizuka takes a shot to the eye socket. That's gotta hurt.
Onizuka uses good head movement to avoid the hook from Grimm.
Grimm takes one on the chin but keeps coming.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Onizuka motions for Grimm to come forward. Onizuka throws a leg kick but it misses it's target.
Grimm stumbles momentarily as he takes a strong leg kick from Onizuka.
Onizuka avoids the body shot from Grimm.
That kick from Onizuka tenderised Grimm's leg. Grimm is trying to keep his angry face on.
Grimm misses with a takedown attempt. He shot from a bit too far out.
Onizuka walks forward and throws out a flicking leg kick. Grimm checks it nicely though, as he moves to the side.
Onizuka ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Grimm moves away.
Great Teacher Onizuka is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Grimm jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Grimm lands a jab.

Grimm shoots in and gets a takedown into Onizuka's guard.
Grimm with a couple of shots to the head there. Not particularly brutal.

Onizuka is active off his back here, looking for submissions.

Onizuka working for submissions but it's allowed Grimm to get to half guard.
Grimm has been the more effective fighter overall so far.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Grimm prevents Onizuka from improving his position.

Onizuka is looking to sinch up a guillotine here but Grimm pulls his head out easily.
Grimm content to sit in half guard and control for a moment.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Grimm seems to be taking a bit of a break to think of his next move. He lands a short punch in the meantime.
Grimm landing with strikes to the body and head, softening up his opponent.
Grimm has the superior BJJ but he's also working some ground strikes into his gameplan.

Onizuka is looking to sinch up a guillotine here but Grimm pulls his head out easily.
Grimm trying to mount his opponent but Onizuka defends it.
Onizuka gets full guard.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Grimm stands up over Onizuka, holding his feet. He dives back in and lands a decent shot to the head.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
Grimm wants to control from the top but Onizuka keeps moving.
Onizuka is working the butterfly guard. He manages to land a nice scissor sweep and is now in half guard on the top. Nice move.

Grimm moves his hips nicely and gets into full guard.
Onizuka loading up with the ground and pound but he's missing more than he's landing in this flurry.
Soylent Grimm has got the better of the ground game so far.

Grimm looking for submissions off his back, moving his hips, looking for an opening.
Grimm looking to sweep here. No luck so far.

Grimm has an active guard here but Onizuka has managed to pass into half guard.
Onizuka prevents Grimm from improving his position.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Onizuka scores with a couple of good hammerfists.
Onizuka lands strikes from half guard.
Onizuka sitting in half guard, looking to land shots. Grimm defending well though.
The referee walks around the fighters to get a better view of the action. Onizuka lands a nice short elbow.
Grimm has hold of Onizuka's hands but Onizuka slips his arm to the side and lands an elbow.
Grimm regains full guard. Nicely done.
Onizuka preventing the sweep.
Grimm is trying to control the position but Onizuka postures up.
Onizuka makes a bit of distance and scores with some ground and pound, still in guard.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

A close second round but Soylent Grimm will probably get the nod - 10:9.
That's time! Back to the action! This is the final round!

Onizuka misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Grimm.
Nice shot lands for Onizuka.
Like a baseball bat into the meat of his leg there - nice leg kick by Onizuka.
Onizuka throws a low kick but his opponent is out of range.
Grimm scores with a sloppy punch to the body. Not much technique there but it did the business.
Grimm throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Onizuka avoids the body shot from Grimm.
Grimm throws a hook but Onizuka blocks it.
Onizuka staying out of range there.
Onizuka drops down looking for a counter takedown but Grimm sprawls and moves away.
Onizuka staying out of range there.
Grimm lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but Onizuka circles away quickly and effectively.
Onizuka feinted with a counter takedown.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Onizuka uses good footwork to get in and out and land a nice right hand before Grimm has time to react.
Grimm tries to drive through with a takedown attempt but Onizuka defends well and Grimm ends up having to push Onizuka into the cage where they will battle it out in the clinch.
Grimm avoids a kick to the body.
Grimm looks to land a left hand but Onizuka moved out of range nicely.
Onizuka thumps Grimm with a low kick.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Onizuka is looking to chop away at Grimm's legs.
Grimm takes a step back and watches a body kick go sailing past his mid section.
Grimm swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
A slow jab from Grimm misses its intended target.
Grimm punishes Onizuka's body with a nice straight punch.
Grimm misses with a straight left.
Onizuka scores with a head kick.
Grimm shoots in but no luck this time.
Grimm uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Onizuka.
A head kick misses from Onizuka.
Onizuka tries a low kick but Grimm avoids it.
Grimm throws a hook to the side of Onizuka's head but Onizuka sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
Grimm showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Onizuka.
Grimm circles away from the clinch attempt.
Onizuka fakes a jab and throws a low kick but Grimm checks it well.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Onizuka on the wrong end of a nice hook.
Grimm lands a nice shot that snaps Onizuka's head back.
Onizuka lunges in with an uppercut that skims his opponent's chin.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Nice uppercut there from Onizuka.
Onizuka keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Grimm lands a right hook to the body.
Onizuka connects with a body shot.
Onizuka misses with a head kick.
Onizuka scores with a leg kick.
Grimm has his front leg slapped to the side - a nice low kick landing there from Onizuka.
Grimm misses with a wild body shot.
Onizuka cracks the inside of Grimm's front leg.
Grimm staying out of range there.
It seemed like Grimm was going to counter with the hook but didn't fully commit to it.
Onizuka needs to keep his hands up - Grimm had a free shot at his head there.
Grimm looks for a takedown but Onizuka sprawls well.
Great Teacher Onizuka has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Soylent Grimm.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Grimm throws a hook but Onizuka blocks it.
Grimm waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Onizuka.
Onizuka takes a shot right to the liver - Bas would have been proud of that punch.
Grimm scores with a hook to the body. Onizuka takes a step back and tries to catch his breath.
Grimm shoots in for a takedown but Onizuka shows good takedown defense.
Onizuka misses with a straight left.
Grimm's hands are dropping dangerously low here and Onizuka connects clean with a right hook that sends him down to one knee! Grimm scrambles back to his feet.
The fight stays on the outside here - Onizuka looks like he's thinking about clinching though.
A shot to the liver by Grimm. Beautiful body shot.

Onizuka moves into the clinch.
Grimm working hard to break the clinch.
Onizuka gets through Grimm's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head.
Soylent Grimm is fighting for a decision - hopefully he's judged it right and he's actually winning the fight.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Grimm jumps guard but his hands slip and he falls flat on his back. Well, he's made himself look a right mug there, as Onizuka walks away with a smile on his face. Grimm gets slowly back to his feet and shakes his head.
Grimm looks to score with a jab to the body but Onizuka is just out of range.
Onizuka scores with a slapping inside leg kick.
Onizuka scores with a hook to the body. Grimm takes a step back and tries to catch his breath.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Onizuka tries to clinch but Grimm is having none of it.
Grimm throws a hook but Onizuka avoids it easily.
Onizuka throws a nice outside leg kick.
Onizuka throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Great Teacher Onizuka has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Onizuka takes a step towards his opponent and connects with a left hand, before circling away.
Onizuka thumps Grimm with a low kick.
Onizuka takes a shot right to the bread basket.
Jab by Grimm.
Onizuka ducks under a wild hook from Grimm.
Grimm is the aggressor but that punch slipped nicely by Onizuka.
Grimm pushing out the jab but it's not landing.

And that's the end of the fight!
Great Teacher Onizuka showed his dominance in that final round.
I think Grimm has won this one but let's see whether the judges agree with me. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Jack Bonds scores the fight 28:29
Judge Percy O'Donnell scores the fight 28:29
Judge Frank Antenori scores the fight 28:29

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Soylent Grimm!
A relieved looking Soylent Grimm thanked the fans for their support and gave the usual line about them being amazing. They seemed to believe that he actually meant it.