PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between Fat Gorrila (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Patrick Bateman (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Bateman has chosen Huey Lewis and The News - Hip To Be Square as his entrance music. Patrick Bateman is staring across the cage at his opponent, tweaking his nipples.

Gorrila
vs
Bateman

194 cm
27
280 lbs
12 - 8 - 0

203 cm
33
274 lbs
24 - 11 - 0

Good wrestling
World class boxer
Insanely flexible

Good wrestler
World class boxer
Granite chin

GREEN!160

GREEN!160
Tokyo United Fightwear

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 12 - 8 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Fat Gorrila!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 24 - 11 - 0, fighting out of London, Patrick Bateman!
The judges for this bout are Frank Antenori, and Jack Bonds.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Bateman scores with a reasonable looking shot to the body. Gorrila doesn't seem bothered though.
Bateman moves out of range as Gorrila throws a body kick.

Gorrila clinches with his opponent.

Bateman breaks the clinch.
Gorrila connects with a jab.
No joy there for Gorrila, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
Bateman misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
The fight stays on the outside here - Gorrila looks like he's thinking about clinching though.
Gorrila checks a leg kick nicely.
A little feinted left hand from Gorrila on the counter but he doesn't commit to it.
Gorrila blocks a head kick by Bateman.
Bateman misses with a body shot.
Ooooh, nice body kick lands from Gorrila. Bateman shrugs it off though.
Bateman throws a jab but it's blocked by Gorrila.

Gorrila darts in and clinches Bateman up against the cage.
Bateman has had enough of the clinch and is looking to separate.
Gorrila stalling the fight.
A frustrated look appears on Bateman's face as he tries to break the clinch.
Gorrila keeps the fight in the clinch, despite Bateman's efforts to push away.
Bateman lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of Gorrila backwards.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Bateman working hard to break the clinch.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Bateman is looking to break free of the clinch but Gorrila has double underhooks.
Still in the clinch, Gorrila scores with a nice short uppercut.

Bateman manages to break the clinch.
Gorrila misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Bateman.
Bateman misses with a body kick.
Gorrila misses with a head kick.
Bateman throws a body shot but no joy.
Gorrila looks to have improved his striking defense since last time we saw him fight.
Gorrila lands a leg kick and bounces back out of range.
Wow, both these guys are really going for it!
Bateman looks for the body kick but Gorrila saw that one coming.
Gorrila goes for a spinning back kick but it misses.

Gorrila forces Bateman back against the cage and clinches.
Gorrila has a couple of punches blocked by Bateman.
Gorrila is trying to slow down the pace of the fight but Bateman is keeping busy.

Bateman pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat.
Gorrila fails in his attempt to clinch.
Gorrila throws a decent looking leg kick but it doesn't land clean.
Gorrila is looking to take this fight into the clinch.
Gorrila moves into range and lands a nice leg kick.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Bateman uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Gorrila.
Bateman thinks about the counter body kick.
Bateman looking to land some kicks to the body here.
Bateman misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Gorrila blocks a head kick by Bateman.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Gorrila throws a sloppy head kick and Bateman moves out of range easily.
Gorrila uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Bateman.
Bateman is looking to slow Gorrila down with leg kicks.
Bateman throws a front kick aimed at Gorrila's knee but Gorrila avoids it well.
Bateman lands a head shot.
Bateman pulls out of a head kick attempt.
It looked like Gorrila was looking amped, ready to throw a big counter but didn't commit.
Gorrila moves in looking to clinch but Bateman pushes him off.
Gorrila throws a body kick but he wasn't in range.
Bateman replies with a solid counter kick to the body but Gorrila blocks it well.
Gorrila takes a nice looking leg kick right on the meat of his thigh there.
Bateman swats away the attempt to clinch by Gorrila.
Bateman throws an overhand right that lands on Gorrila's shoulder, as Gorrila tries to avoid the shot.
Gorrila throws a head kick that misses.
A solid body kick from Gorrila.
Gorrila throws a head kick that connects with a bit of head and a bit of hand.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Bateman throws a body shot but no joy.
Gorrila scores with a leg kick.
Gorrila throws a right high kick that is partially blocked by Bateman.
Gorrila throws the left hand but Bateman avoids the punch easily.
Bateman blocks a head kick by Gorrila.
Bateman throws a leg kick but Gorrila moved away.
Bateman throws a leg kick but Gorrila moved away.
Bateman on the receiving end of a decent leg kick there by Gorrila. Gorrila obviously looking to wear him down.
Gorrila feints and then cracks Bateman's leading leg with a nice low kick. He's obviously looking to slow Bateman down.
Bateman avoids the clinch attempt nicely.
Gorrila throws a monster uppercut resembling something out of street fighter but it doesn't land.
Bateman throws a half hearted mid kick.
Bateman is throwing a lot of body shots here, looking to wear down Gorrila rather than just go for the knockout.
Gorrila throws a left and a right that both miss
and Bateman counters with a three punch combination, finished off with a leg kick. Nice work.
Gorrila chopped to the floor by a nice leg kick but he springs right back up before Bateman can pounce on him.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Gorrila works the jab nicely.
Bateman tries to check a leg kick but that clearly hurt him.
Gorrila lands a leg kick and bounces back out of range.
Good work by Gorrila as he checks the leg kick.
Gorrila scores with a nice looking left hook and follows it up with an uppercut!

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Gorrila misses with a kick to the body.
Nice body kick from Gorrila.
Gorrila lands a leg kick that knocks Bateman off balance momentarily.
Bateman takes a push kick to the midsection and stumbles backwards.
Bateman throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Gorrila lifts his leg as if looking to counter with a high kick.
Bateman throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Gorrila scores with a nice head shot.
Gorrila catches Bateman with a nice straight right. He seems pissed - ooooh, it's on now! On like donkey kong!
Gorrila throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Gorrila misses the jab.
Bateman connects with a lovely jab that went straight through the gap between Gorrila's hands.
Gorrila throws a head kick but Bateman moves out of range.
Gorrila throws a push kick but Bateman slaps the foot to one side.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Gorrila scores with a straight right hand, right through his opponent's guard.
A chopping leg kick lands by Bateman.
Bateman moves out of range of the body kick.
This fight brought to you by 5M nutrition - it's mmmmm tasty. Nice jab by Bateman.
Bateman tries to land a front kick but Gorrila steps back. That was a bit too telegraphed.
Gorrila was looking to counter that move with a punch but didn't quite pull the trigger.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Fat Gorrila dominated that round.
The minute break is over - no more time for sponges and pep talks - back to the action!

Bateman lands with a head kick! That's gotta hurt.
Gorrila lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but Bateman circles away quickly and effectively.

Gorrila has closed the distance and engaged Bateman in a clinch.

Bateman pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat.
Gorrila blocks a head kick by Bateman.
A nice leg kick lands there from Bateman.
Nice straight punches there by Gorrila. You know Roy Jones Jr respects the hands of Gorrila.
Bateman looks to land a right hand but Gorrila moved out of range.
Bateman throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Gorrila blocks the body kick.
Bateman scores with a leg kick.
Gorrila scores with a jab to the head.
Gorrila jabs. That one connects to the head of his opponent.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Bateman throws a leg kick that misses.
Gorrila slips a jab from Bateman.

Gorrila closes the distance and presses his opponent up against the cage.

Bateman breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat.
Gorrila misses the jab.
Gorrila avoids a lazy jab quite easily.
Gorrila appears to be looking for a big counter.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Bateman ducks under an overhand right and circles away with a smile on his face.
Bateman's leg has a nasty welt from taking a succession of leg kicks. That must be slowing him down.
A looping hook to the body misses from Gorrila. Bateman does a little dance to reset his feet.
Gorrila is looking to take this fight into the clinch.
Bateman digs a good body shot into Gorrila's ribs.
Bateman throws a poor cross that misses
and Gorrila counters with a nice jab to the body that keeps Bateman thinking.
Gorrila swinging wildly here.
Gorrila moves into range and lands a nice leg kick.
Good work by Gorrila as he checks the leg kick.
Gorrila throws a hook but Bateman avoids it easily.
Bateman looks like he wants to counter punch here.
Gorrila throws an overhand right that lands on Bateman's shoulder, as Bateman tries to avoid the shot.
Bateman thinks about the counter body kick.
Gorrila avoids a punch combination nicely.

Gorrila gets to the clinch - let's see what his plan is here.

Bateman breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Gorrila lands a nice leg kick that just misses Bateman's sensitive parts.
Gorrila lands a jab to the nose.
Bateman thuds a mid kick into his opponent's body. That will wear on Gorrila if he has to take too many more of those.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Gorrila tries to clinch up.
The fight stays on the outside here - Gorrila looks like he's thinking about clinching though.
Nice defenses there by Bateman.
Gorrila is looking to take this fight into the clinch.
Gorrila misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
A head kick from Bateman lands but Gorrila takes it in his stride.
Bateman misses with an attempted mid kick.
Gorrila connects with a leg kick. Bateman looked like he was expecting something else and didn't defend it.
Gorrila thuds a mid kick into his opponent's body. That will wear on Bateman if he has to take too many more of those.
Bateman takes a head kick and shrugs it off.
Bateman throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Gorrila takes one on the chin but seems OK.
Good exchange - Bateman coming out on top.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Bateman steps to his left, right into the path of a big body kick from Gorrila. That one must have hurt.
Bateman is looking to chop away at Gorrila's legs.
Gorrila lands a leg kick and bounces back out of range.
Gorrila lands a leg kick. The shin dug right into the meat of the thigh.
Fat Gorrila is winning the standup battle so far.
Gorrila tries to clinch up.
Gorrila throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Bateman plants his feet and lands a nice head kick!
Gorrila moves to clinch but Bateman breaks away
and Bateman makes him pay by landing a nice hook to the body before moving out of range.
Bateman blocks a head kick by Gorrila.
Gorrila feints a straight left to the body, then turns around with a flashy move and hits Batemans jaw with a dramatic spinning back fist!
Good shot there by Gorrila.
Gorrila wants to clinch up but Bateman keeps it at a distance.
Bateman digs a good body shot into Gorrila's ribs.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Bateman throws a jab when Gorrila was well out of range.
Gorrila seem to be loading up, looking for a big counter.
Bateman throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Bateman misses with a straight right.

Gorrila has Bateman up against the cage in a clinch.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
A short right from Bateman on the inside.

Bateman escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
Bateman works the jab nicely.
Gorrila throws a solid leg kick but Bateman takes the impact on his shin and smiles at Gorrila.
Bateman connects with an inside leg kick.
Gorrila misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Bateman clobbers Gorrila with an overhand right that has the crowd gasping. That made a horrendous noise.
Gorrila goes to the watering hole and comes back with a big thumbs up from the judges as he scores a three punch combo.
Gorrila throws a nice outside leg kick.
Gorrila feints with a shoulder and throws a nice leg kick to Bateman's calf.
Gorrila lands a jab to the nose.
Gorrila lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but Bateman circles away quickly and effectively.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Bateman with a body punch. A glancing blow.
Both fighters are absolutely exhausted here.
Gorrila has his hands up protecting his head but a hook from Bateman finds it's way round the side to connect with Gorrila's head.
Bateman looking to throw a kick but he's pulled out of it.
Bateman avoids the body shot from Gorrila.
Gorrila throws a nice head kick!
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

That was a close second round but I would say that Fat Gorrila will probably get the nod.
That's time! Gorrila's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight. This is the final round!

Bateman scores with a jab to the body.
Gorrila throws a chopping leg kick but Bateman manages to avoid taking any serious damage.
Bateman uses good footwork to get in and out and land a nice right hand before Gorrila has time to react.
Gorrila throws a big shot that misses.
Bateman misses the shot to the body.
A head kick misses from Gorrila.
Bateman cracks Gorrila with a hook to the jaw. Both fighters smile at eachother and high-five before getting back down to business.

Gorrila is rocked!
Gorrila tries to clinch but Bateman is having none of it.
Oh Gorrila is still all over the place! His legs are completely gone! Will he be able to recover?!!
The fighters circle, before Bateman throws a beautiful high kick that crashes into Gorrila's neck, sending him stumbling to the floor! Bateman lands more strikes and forces a referee stoppage! That one ended in an instant!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 0:31 of round 3, we have a winner by way of TKO (Kick & Punches). Patrick Bateman!
A very excited looking Patrick Bateman made sure he remembered to thank all the fans both in the arena and on the internet. He said all the coolest people spend all day on MMA websites, which got a big reaction.