PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between Eric Cartmen (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Heart Breaker (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Chooooooooon! I think Cartmen might be my favorite fighter, now he's come out to Eric Cartman - Come Sail Away . Both fighters look fresh as a daisy as they make their way towards the cage.

Cartmen
vs
Breaker

181 cm
21
210 lbs
7 - 2 - 0

190 cm
20
250 lbs
4 - 0 - 0

BJJ Purple Belt
Counter fighter
Insanely flexible

Decent wrestler
Excellent boxer
Good gas tank

The Empire Clothing and Laundry
Master Lee's One Stop

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 7 - 2 - 0, fighting out of New York, Eric Cartmen!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 4 - 0 - 0, fighting out of New York, Heart Breaker!
The judges for this bout are Jonathan Paton, Dean Styles and Bruno Lombardi.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Breaker lands with an overhand left.

It looks like Eric Cartmen has been cut.
Cartmen moves out of range as Breaker strikes.
Breaker throws a series of punches but Cartmen avoids them all with ease.
Breaker tries to bum rush Cartmen with a series of wild strikes but Cartmen uses good footwork to avoid the assault.
Breaker throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Cartmen.
Heart Breaker seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Some wild striking there from Breaker.
Breaker tries to check a leg kick but that clearly hurt him.
Breaker fakes a jab and then connects with a hook.
Breaker swinging wildly here.
Breaker looks to score with a jab to the body but Cartmen is just out of range.
Cartmen takes a really solid shot there but just smiles back and shrugs his shoulders.
Cartmen keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Breaker.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Cartmen looking to throw a kick but he's pulled out of it.
Breaker is loading up here, looking for a big counter of his own.
Breaker has been spending a lot of time sparring his boxing in the run up to the fight, trying to sharpen up those hands and look for a knockout.
Jab, cross, leg kick. Nice combination by Breaker!
Cartmen uses good head movement to avoid the hook from Breaker.
Cartmen tries to counter with a takedown but Breaker is quick to defend against it.
Cartmen lands a nice looking kick to the body. Breaker takes a step back to recover.

That's one minute gone in the round.
A combination from Breaker does no damage.
Cartmen takes an uppercut right on the jaw but it doesn't phase him.
Cartmen keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Breaker.

Cartmen clinches.
Cartmen is looking to control Breaker's arms but Breaker gets an underhook and turns him. Now Cartmen has his back to the cage.
Breaker wants to strike at distance but he can't break free of the clinch.
Breaker takes an elbow to the temple.

It looks like Heart Breaker has been cut.
Breaker is trying to force a seperation but Cartmen has the dominant position.
Cartmen with a knee to the head.
Cartmen tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Cartmen tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
Cartmen leaning his opponent against the cage.
Cartmen tries to stall but Breaker uses the opportunity to gain a better position.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Breaker stalling against the cage.
Cartmen throws an elbow but it's blocked.
Breaker avoiding damage as Cartmen throws knees to the body.
Breaker is trying to stall.
Cartmen can't find room to land a body shot as Breaker controls the action.
A battle for position here, against the cage.
A short uppercut from Cartmen.
Breaker is trying to break the clinch but Cartmen has him pressed against the cage.
Cartmen works for underhooks and lands a body shot in the process.
I was talking to Cartmen's coach per-fight and he was telling me that they'd been working on the clinch in the runup to this fight.
A body shot lands from Cartmen.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Cartmen tries to stall but Breaker uses the opportunity to gain a better position.
Some stalling of biblical proportions here from Cartmen.
Cartmen goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
Breaker is trying to break the clinch but Cartmen has him pressed against the cage.
Cartmen holding his opponent close, against the cage.
Cartmen misses with a body punch.
Cartmen missing with knees to the body.
Breaker is trying to push Cartmen away but Cartmen has him pressed against the cage, so he's going nowhere.

Cartmen drags the fight down to the ground.
Breaker must be cautious of submissions here, given that his opponent has the superior Jiu Jitsu.

Cartmen is looking for a guillotine. You can't force these things though and Breaker defends well.
Breaker passes into half guard.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Cartmen tries to regain full guard. Instead though, Breaker has advanced to mount. Uh oh.
Cartmen wants to control but Breaker is having none of it.
Cartmen sneaks a leg under to get to half guard.
Cartmen punching from the bottom.

Cartmen has guillotine here! It looks pretty tight! Could this be all over! No, Breaker escapes and passes into side control at the same time. Nice work there by Breaker!
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Heart Breaker dominated that round.
Both fighters have cut men working on them during the interval.
The minute break is over - no more time for sponges and pep talks - back to the action!

A combination from Breaker does no damage.
Cartmen tries to counter with a takedown but Breaker is quick to defend against it.
Cartmen avoids the body shot from Breaker.
Breaker fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
Breaker displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Cartmen throws out the jab.
Cartmen throws a hook to the side of Breaker's head but Breaker sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
Cartmen uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Breaker.
Breaker sizes up Cartmen with a pawing jab and scores with a straight right down the middle.
Heart Breaker is looking to throw some combinations by the looks of things.
Cartmen pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Cartmen takes one to the chin there.
Breaker throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Cartmen is looking to counter the offense by Breaker and move into the clinch.
Breaker moves out of range as Cartmen throws a body kick.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Cartmen delivers a nice body kick.
Breaker misses with a straight right.
Cartmen throws a looping overhand right but Breaker ducks down to avoid it.
Breaker might want to mix his strikes up a bit more. He's just going for head shots at the moment and that can become a bit predictable.
Breaker misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Good standup being displayed there by Breaker as he connects with a hook.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Cartmen ducks under a wild hook from Breaker.
Breaker has been the more effective fighter overall so far.
Breaker throws a combination. Cartmen tries to block but a couple of punches get through.

Eric Cartmen's cut is getting worse.
Cartmen tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Breaker was well out of range. Poor timing from Cartmen.
Heart Breaker seems to be getting the better of the standup.
A combination from Breaker does no damage.
A cross from Breaker lands.
Breaker throws a right and a left that both miss.
Cartmen with a nice looking leg kick. You could hear that one land in a back row.
Breaker looks to land a combination. Cartmen sees it coming but can only parry a couple of the shots.
Breaker tries to check a leg kick but that clearly hurt him.
A big right from Breaker misses.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Cartmen connects with a solid leg kick.
Breaker misses with a jab, cross combination.
Cartmen ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Breaker moves away.
Breaker takes a swing at Cartmen's ribcage but misses.
Breaker throws a hook but Cartmen blocks it.
Jab from Breaker.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Breaker takes a shot right to the liver - Bas would have been proud of that punch.
Cartmen tries to score a power double leg takedown but Breaker sees that one coming and sprawls well. That will dishearten Cartmen somewhat.
Breaker lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but Cartmen circles away quickly and effectively.
Cartmen drops down looking for a counter takedown but Breaker sprawls and moves away.
Breaker throws a series of punches but Cartmen avoids them all with ease.
Cartmen tries to counter by moving into the clinch but Breaker manages to circle out of the way.
Breaker rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Cartmen moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Cartmen uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Breaker.
Breaker lets the fists fly and connects with a left straight followed by a right hook.
Cartmen looks to land a body kick but Breaker moved away.
Breaker throws a right and a left that both miss.
Jab by Breaker.
Breaker looks to land a combination but Cartmen avoids it well.
Cartmen half commits to a counter takedown before pushing away, out of range.
Breaker moves into range and throws a lovely three punch combination.

Eric Cartmen's cut is bleeding quite badly. He's got to try and protect it.
Breaker rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Cartmen moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Cartmen drops down looking for a counter takedown but Breaker sprawls and moves away.
Breaker is breathing heavily.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Cartmen throws a leg kick but he was too far away and it doesn't land.
Cartmen gets cracked there but stands up to it.
Cartmen connects with a leg kick. Breaker looked like he was expecting something else and didn't defend it.
Cartmen thuds a mid kick into his opponent's body. That will wear on Breaker if he has to take too many more of those.
Breaker swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Breaker throws a right hand that Cartmen ducks under and follows up with a left that Cartmen also avoids with ease.
Breaker throws a series of punches but Cartmen moves out of range.
Cartmen throws a nice hook to the body that draws an oooh from the crowd.
Cartmen keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Cartmen ducks under a wild hook from Breaker.
Cartmen moves away from the strike by Breaker.
Cartmen attempts a counter takedown but Breaker avoids it well and moves away.
Cartmen is looking to land body kicks.
Breaker swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Cartmen feints and then cracks Breaker's leading leg with a nice low kick. He's obviously looking to slow Breaker down.
Cartmen slips under a jab.
Breaker swinging wildly here.
Cartmen feinted with a counter takedown.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Cartmen misses the shot to the body.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
A combination from Breaker does no damage.
Cartmen throws a body kick but he wasn't in range.
Breaker looks shocked there as he takes a right hand to the temple.
Cartmen goes for a spinning back kick but it misses.
Cartmen moves out of range of the strikes.
Cartmen tries a head kick but it misses.
Breaker throws a left and a right that both miss
and Cartmen counters with a body kick that brings a smile to the face of both fighters.
Breaker fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
Breaker takes a kick to the body and keeps moving.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Cartmen throws the kick towards the body but Breaker avoids it.
Cartmen fakes a couple of low kicks, before throwing one on the third attempt. It connects and Breaker has to reset his feet before getting ready to engage.
Breaker misses with a looping left.
A head kick misses from Cartmen.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Heart Breaker showed his class in that round. I'd imagine he'll take it on all the scorecards.
Both fighters have cut men working on them during the interval.
The fighters get back to their feet, the hooter sounds and we're back to the action! This is the final round!

Cartmen is looking to clinch.
Breaker misses with a looping right.
Breaker throws a right and a left that both miss.
Cartmen tries to counter with a takedown but Breaker is quick to defend against it.
Breaker doesn't react quick enough there as he takes a shot to the body.
Cartmen wants to land a leg kick but Breaker is out of range.
Cartmen is looking to wear down Breaker with body shots, infact he's throwing more body shots than head shots at the moment.
Sloppy strikes from Breaker. Those never looked like landing.
Breaker misses with a jab, cross combination.
Cartmen throws a push kick but Breaker slaps the foot to one side.
Cartmen misses with a few strikes there.
Breaker swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.
Cartmen drops down looking for a counter takedown but Breaker sprawls and moves away.
Cartmen tries to drive through with a takedown attempt but Breaker defends well and Cartmen ends up having to push Breaker into the cage where they will battle it out in the clinch.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Jab, cross, leg kick. Nice combination by Breaker!
Cartmen tries to drive through with a takedown attempt but Breaker defends well and Cartmen ends up having to push Breaker into the cage where they will battle it out in the clinch.
Breaker throws a right hand that misses

so Cartmen counters with a double leg into guard. Good agility.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.

Cartmen drops back for a leg but he's not going to get it - he lets go and Breaker dives on top into guard.

Breaker takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.

That's one minute gone in the round.

Cartmen is looking for a triangle here but Breaker uses the submission attempt to pass into side control.
Cartmen tries to get back to half guard but can't.
Breaker controls the position from side control.
Cartmen is moving his hips around well on the bottom and has managed to get back to half guard.
Eric Cartmen has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Neither fighter has done anything of merit for a good minute or two here and the crowd are not happy about it.
Breaker wants to control but Cartmen is keeping him busy.
Breaker trying to control the pace.

Cartmen looking to work for a kimura from the bottom.
Cartmen moves his hips nicely and gets into full guard.
Breaker wants to stand but Cartmen is controlling his posture from full guard.

That's three minutes gone in the round.

Cartmen looking for submissions from the bottom here. Moving his hips around, possibly looking for an armbar.

Breaker got a little sloppy there for a moment and Cartmen has worked his way into a loose triangle - can he finish it?! No, Breaker has managed to get both his arms back between Cartmen's legs - danger averted.

Cartmen has his foot on Breaker's thigh. He's trying to push off and get in position for a triangle, I think. Breaker works his way back into a safe position though.
Eric Cartmen overall seems to be getting the better of the ground position in the fight so far.
Breaker is stalling in the full guard.
Breaker has decided he wants to stand but the closed guard of Cartmen is proving hard to escape from.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
There's not a lot going on here and the crowd are letting the fighters know they're not willing to tolerate a lack of action.

Cartmen is working actively off his back, looking to secure an arm or perhaps work for a triangle.
Breaker showing good wrestling skills to control the position.

The ref stands the fighters back up due to a lack of activity.
Cartmen misses with a hook.
Cartmen takes a jab right on the kisser.
Cartmen has his head slapped from side to side by a 3 punch combination. That must have hurt him.
Cartmen throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
The crowd thankful this round is nearly over.
Breaker swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.
Cartmen needs to keep his hands up - Breaker had a free shot at his head there.
Cartmen looks to score with a jab to the body but Breaker is just out of range.
Breaker throws out a counter right but Cartmen avoids it with no problem.
Heart Breaker is fighting for a decision - hopefully he's judged it right and he's actually winning the fight.
Cartmen lands a straight punch to the body, keeping Breaker at a distance.

And that's the end of the fight!
Heart Breaker comfortably won the final round on my scorecard.
I've got Breaker winning every round here. Surely the decision will go his way and he'll pick up a well deserved decision victory. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Jonathan Paton scores the fight 27:30
Judge Dean Styles scores the fight 27:30
Judge Bruno Lombardi scores the fight 27:30

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Heart Breaker!
In defeat, Eric Cartmen stepped up to the mic, saying 'screw you guys i'm going home'.