PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between Dick Army (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Danny Ciprianni (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Army's ring entrance music is that housewives' favourite, Vagina Coastguard. Over to our ring announcer for the fighter introductions!

Army
vs
Ciprianni

189 cm
24
219 lbs
14 - 4 - 0

191 cm
24
213 lbs
5 - 5 - 0

Good wrestling
Excellent boxer
Granite chin

Olympic wrestler
Excellent MT
Good gas tank

Bullet Proof System

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the light heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 14 - 4 - 0, fighting out of Sydney, Dick Army!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 5 - 5 - 0, fighting out of London, Danny Ciprianni!
The judges for this bout are Stewart Dunkirk, Gwen Towbar and Cecil Peabody.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Army uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Ciprianni.
Army half committed to a counter leg kick.
Ciprianni throws an overhand right that lands on Army's shoulder, as Army tries to avoid the shot.
Jab by Army.
Army motions for Ciprianni to come forward. Army throws a leg kick but it misses it's target.
Ciprianni misses with a shot to the body
and Army counters with a nice uppercut.
Ciprianni fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Army manages to avoid it.
Nice uppercut there from Ciprianni.
Ciprianni uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Army.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Ciprianni takes a nice looking leg kick right on the meat of his thigh there.
Ciprianni chopped to the floor by a nice leg kick but he springs right back up before Army can pounce on him.
Army scores with a jab to the jaw of his opponent.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Ciprianni tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Ciprianni throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Army swings wildly with a hook that is half blocked by Ciprianni.
Ciprianni takes one to the chin there.
Ciprianni takes a thudding leg kick, right into the meat of the thigh.
Army misses with a straight right.
The fighters circling - Army throws out the jab but it was never going to land.
Army looks to land a right hand but Ciprianni moved out of range.
Ciprianni thinks about the counter body kick.
Army misses with a low kick.
A low kick from Army is predictable there
and Ciprianni cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
Army tries to clinch but Ciprianni is having none of it.
Dick Army is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Ciprianni blocks a head kick by Army.
Ciprianni throws a lazy body kick

and Army counters into the clinch. Nicely done.
A head punch on the inside from Army fails to land.
A short left from Ciprianni.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
A nice left hand lands by Army.
Army has had enough of the clinch and is looking to separate.
Army blocks a body shot from Ciprianni.
Ciprianni misses with a punch on the inside.
Army misses with a hook from the clinch.
Ciprianni misses the knee to the body. Nice hip positioning from Army.
Army prevents a body shot from Ciprianni.
Ciprianni blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Both fighters working to control the clinch.
Army misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Ciprianni tries to take the fight to the ground by pulling guard but can't manage it.
Army lands a nice looking hook to the body, against the cage.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Army.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Ciprianni blocks an uppercut.
Army lands a body punch.
Army has a couple of punches blocked by Ciprianni.
Ciprianni misses with a punch on the inside.
Army swings wildly with an uppercut but Ciprianni uses good head movement to avoid it.
Army working some nice short punches in the clinch.
Ciprianni scores with a shoulder strike.
Ciprianni throws a punch but it's blocked by Army.
Army creates a bit of distance and throws an elbow that only just misses.
Ciprianni swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Ciprianni throws a head punch that misses.

Ciprianni pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat.
Ciprianni cracks a nice hook into Army's ribs.
Army connects with a leg kick. He turned his hip over nicely there.
Army is looking to clinch.
Army misses with a straight left.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
An inside leg kick from Army misses.
Army swings wildly with a couple of big hooks

and Ciprianni counters with a nice double leg into half guard.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Ciprianni seems content to maintain position for now, rather than mounting any offense.
Ciprianni trying to mount his opponent but Army defends it.
Ciprianni is trying to control. Army wants to improve his position but can't escape this time.

Ciprianni is working for a kimura but Army is defending it quite comfortably.
Ciprianni seems very keen to just sit and control from half guard but Army does not like that idea so much and is remaining active off his back.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Dick Army dominated that round.
That's the end of the round. The referee orders the cornermen out of the cage so we can get back down to business.

A jab from Ciprianni misses.
Army digs a good hook to Ciprianni's body.
Ciprianni checks a low kick from Army.
Army throws a body shot but no joy.
That's a knee to de groin and it's over and out! Army crumples to the ground after an illegal strike from Ciprianni - the referee stops the clock and Army gets 5 minutes to recover from that one. "I'm sorry" says Ciprianni. Army manages to get back to his feet and the fight resumes.
Ciprianni takes a body kick right on the floating rib. Ouchie.
Army throws a sloppy body shot
and Ciprianni counters with a right hand to the body.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
A low kick from Army is predictable there
and Ciprianni cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
The fight stays on the outside here - Army looks like he's thinking about clinching though.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Army throws a lazy right hand but Ciprianni sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
Ciprianni swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Ciprianni swings widly with a right hand
and Army counters with a nice kick to the body.
Army throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Army swings away with a body shot that misses
and Army takes a counter punch right on the button for his troubles.
Army misses with a body kick.
Ciprianni moves into range and connects with a jab.
Ciprianni moves out of range as Army throws a body kick.
Army throws a leg kick that is checked
and Ciprianni counters with a leg kick that reverborates around the arena.
Army closes the distance and takes a jab right on the nose as he does so.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Ciprianni lands with an overhand left.
Army on the wrong end of a nice low kick. He's acting like it's no big deal but he doesn't want to take many more of those.
Army moves out of range as Ciprianni strikes.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Ciprianni misses the jab.
Ciprianni throws a hook but Army blocks it.
Army wants to clinch.
Army throws a leg kick which misses Ciprianni's front leg but catches the back leg as Ciprianni tries to avoid it.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Ciprianni throws a head kick that misses.
Army throws a body kick that misses.
Army's corner calls for a 1-2. Army obliges with the 1 part as he scores the single shot and moves back out of range.
Some bone on bone action there as Ciprianni checks a low kick. Luckily it wasn't a particularly hard one.
Army jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Army misses with a hook to the body
and Ciprianni counters with a shot to the ribs. That looked like it hurt.
Ciprianni dances in quickly and lands a nice inside leg kick on Army. That did some damage!
Army lands a high kick!
Ciprianni throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Army throws a jab when Ciprianni was well out of range.
Ciprianni lands with a shot to the body.
Ciprianni tries a head kick but it misses.
Ciprianni misses with a body shot.
Army avoids the head kick by Ciprianni.
Good work by Ciprianni as he checks the leg kick.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Army misses with a low kick.
Danny Ciprianni seems to be getting the better of the standup.
Ciprianni lands an overhand left. A wild punch that just about connected.

Army gets tackled into the cage by Ciprianni. Ciprianni maintains the clinch.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Danny Ciprianni showed his class in that round. I'd imagine he'll take it on all the scorecards.
The referee calls time. The cornermen exit stage left and we're back to business. This is the final round!

A telegraphed right hand from Ciprianni misses the target.
Army walks forward, straight into a front kick from Ciprianni.
Ciprianni throws a mid kick that lands with a slap.
Army defending well as Ciprianni loads up on a big left hand.
Ciprianni takes one on the chin but seems OK.
Ciprianni lands a leg kick. The shin dug right into the meat of the thigh.
Army misses with a hook
and Ciprianni counters with a nice low kick that buckles Army's knee momentarily.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Army moves out of range of the leg kick from Ciprianni.
Ciprianni throws a looping overhand right but Army ducks down to avoid it.
Army lands an overhand right.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Ciprianni thuds a mid kick into his opponent's body. That will wear on Army if he has to take too many more of those.
Army takes a swing at Ciprianni's ribcage but misses.
Ciprianni looks like he wants to counter punch here.
Army on the wrong end of a nice hook.
Army displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Ciprianni throws out the jab.
Oooooooooooh, not good. A low kick from Army lands where it shouldn't have, right in the... well, you know what he did? He kicked him in the penis. He's injured, injured bad. The referee sends both fighters to their corners and Ciprianni has 5 minutes to recover. He's OK now though... a thumbs up from Ciprianni and we're back underway with a touch of gloves.
Ciprianni is clearly trying to counter these attacks from Army with a body shot.
Army tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in to close the distance. Ciprianni manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
It seemed like Ciprianni was going to counter with the hook but didn't fully commit to it.
Army throws an off balance right hand
letting Ciprianni counter with a right hand.
Ciprianni moves out of range as Army strikes.
Both fighters circling a little - Army finishes the exchange with a kick to the body.
Ciprianni throws a predictable looking body shot
and Army counters with a nice body kick.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Ciprianni steps to his left, right into the path of a big body kick from Army. That one must have hurt.
Ciprianni misses with the combination.
Army scores with a jab to the body.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Army attempts a low kick but it misses it's target.
Army jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Ciprianni takes a head kick and keeps coming.
Ciprianni walks forward, straight into a front kick from Army.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Army misses with a kick to the body
and Ciprianni counters with a body kick that brings a smile to the face of both fighters.
Ciprianni throws an ugly left hook that misses
and Army counters with an inside leg kick.
Army misses with a body kick.
Ciprianni thows a left - swing and a miss!
Ciprianni on the wrong end of a nice low kick. He's acting like it's no big deal but he doesn't want to take many more of those.
Army misses with a low kick.
Army tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Ciprianni was well out of range. Poor timing from Army.
Army walks into a jab.
Ciprianni moves out of range as Army throws a body kick.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Ciprianni pulls out of a head kick attempt.
A slow jab from Ciprianni misses its intended target.
Ciprianni keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Ciprianni swings away with a counter right hand but no contact made.
Ciprianni misses with a hook.
Ciprianni throws a body shot but no joy.
Ciprianni throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Army throws a body kick but he was well out of range there.
Ciprianni connects with a crisp jab.
Army fakes and then throws a beautiful body shot. Ciprianni looks a bit winded and takes a step backwards to take a breath.

And that's the end of the fight!
I would just about give that final round to Danny Ciprianni.
I think Ciprianni has won this one but let's see whether the judges agree with me. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Stewart Dunkirk scores the fight 28:29
Judge Gwen Towbar scores the fight 29:29
Judge Cecil Peabody scores the fight 28:29

In favor of your winner, by majority decision... Danny Ciprianni!
Danny Ciprianni spent the whole post fight interview bigging himself up. It didn't go down that well with the fans after a while as they thought it was a bit arrogant.