PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight kickboxing rules bout between Tubo Lard (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Ronald McDonald (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Lard comes into the arena with I'm Fat blaring out of the sound system. The atmosphere really building for this one as we go over to our ring announcer for the fighter introductions!

Lard
vs
McDonald

197 cm
40
223 lbs
24 - 19 - 0

200 cm
25
252 lbs
10 - 5 - 0

World class boxer
Insanely flexible

Dangerous knees
Powerful

Sun-Tzu

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 24 - 19 - 0, fighting out of Amsterdam, Tubo Lard!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 10 - 5 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, Ronald McDonald!
The judges for this bout are Aafke Stam, Wagner Zegers and Nard Betker.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
McDonald misses with a lunging right hand
and he gets countered with a snapping leg kick.

McDonald darts in and clinches Lard up against the ropes.
Lard pushes off and fires off an elbow that misses, before clinching up again, against the ropes.
Lard misses with a body punch.
McDonald digs a right hand into Lard's ribs. Those have got to be taking their toll on Lard's gas tank.
McDonald's coach down at Vicious Striking was telling us pre-fight that they have been working on McDonald's balance. Obviously they view that as a key factor in the outcome of this fight.
McDonald misses with a body punch.
Lard has had enough of the clinch and is looking to separate.
Lard can't find room to land a body shot as McDonald controls the action.
Lard working hard to break the clinch.

McDonald breaks the clinch.
McDonald staying out of range there.
McDonald throws out a counter right but Lard avoids it with no problem.
McDonald throws a looping overhand right but Lard ducks down to avoid it.
McDonald misses with a straight left.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
A swing and a miss from McDonald.
McDonald missing with a left hand there. Lard was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
McDonald fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
That kick from Lard tenderised McDonald's leg. McDonald is trying to keep his angry face on.
McDonald is looking to chop away at Lard's legs.
McDonald misses with a body kick.
Ronald McDonald seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.

That's one minute gone in the round.
McDonald works his jab well there, keeping his opponent at a distance.
Lard scores with a head kick. McDonald tried to block it but didn't get his arm up in time.
McDonald finds nothing but air with that leg kick attempt.
McDonald shakes his hands off, looking to compose himself, but takes a jab to the jaw whilst he does it.
The fighters circle momentarily. Lard darts into range and connects with a nice straight punch.
A telegraphed right hand from Lard misses the target.
McDonald avoids the head kick by Lard.
Lard moves into range and lands a nice leg kick.
Lard tries a head kick but it misses.
Lard goes for a spinning back kick but it misses.
McDonald is trying to avoid his opponent's strikes and get into the clinch.
A nice leg kick lands there from Lard.
Lard takes a nice looking leg kick right on the meat of his thigh there.
McDonald on the wrong end of a nice hook.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Lard misses with a looping left.
McDonald wants to counter the offense by Lard and move into the clinch position.
McDonald misses with a hook
and Lard counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Lard fakes a couple of low kicks, before throwing one on the third attempt. It connects and McDonald has to reset his feet before getting ready to engage.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Lard misses with a looping left.
A low kick from Lard is predictable there

and McDonald counters into the clinch. Nicely done.
McDonald tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
A nice glancing elbow lands by Lard.
Lard misses with a hook to the ribs.

McDonald breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat.
Lard throws a front kick aimed at McDonald's knee but McDonald avoids it well.
McDonald swings away with a counter right hand but no contact made.

McDonald gets a clinch.
McDonald trying to control the position but instead, Lard has worked for underhooks and has pushed McDonald into the ropes.
McDonald just leaning against Lard, taking a breather.
Lard lands a knee to the head there! That was nasty!
A shot in the inside from Lard.

Lard escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
McDonald throws a right hand that misses
and Lard makes the exchange count by landing a cracking kick to the body. McDonald really felt that one!
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
McDonald misses with a body shot.
McDonald pushing out the jab but it's not landing.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Tubo Lard dominated that round.
The referee calls time. The cornermen exit stage left and we're back to business.

Lard throws a head kick but McDonald moves out of range.
McDonald misses with an uppercut.
A quick step to the side and Lard tries to counter with a shot to the body but it doesn't connect.
McDonald ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Lard moves away.
Lard is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that McDonald can do to turn this around?
McDonald chopped to the floor by a nice leg kick but he springs right back up before Lard can pounce on him.
Lard throws a decent looking leg kick but it doesn't land clean.
McDonald is looking to clinch.
McDonald misses with an attempted mid kick.
McDonald tests Lard's chin there with a solid looking shot.

McDonald rushes Lard and pushes him back against the ropes in a clinch.

McDonald breaks the clinch.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
McDonald stumbles momentarily as he takes a strong leg kick from Lard.
Lard throws a body kick that misses.
McDonald looked like he wanted to counter with a punch but didn't throw it.
Lard takes a thudding leg kick, right into the meat of the thigh.
McDonald throws a jab but it's blocked by Lard.
McDonald looks to land a right hand but Lard moved out of range.
Lard fakes a jab and scores with a low kick.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Lard slips under a jab from McDonald.
Lard looked to counter that last move with a leg kick but didn't pull the trigger.

McDonald fakes with an overhand right and moves in to clinch with Lard, pushing him back against the ropes.
McDonald lands a hook that snaps the head of Lard backwards.
Lard tries to throw a body punch but McDonald avoids it by throwing Lard back against the ropes.
Lard has had enough of the clinch and is looking to separate.
A short right from McDonald.
A nice glancing elbow lands by Lard.
McDonald lands a body shot in the clinch.
McDonald misses with a knee strike.
Lard doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
McDonald tries to land a knee to the head but Lard blocks with his arms.
Lard tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
McDonald looking to stall.
McDonald blocking some punches.
McDonald scores with a knee to the head.
Lard lands with a quick shot inside that doesn't really do much damage.
McDonald blocks a body shot from Lard.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
McDonald using the Thai plumb to throw knees but Lard has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
McDonald is working Lard over against the ropes.
Lard lands a knee to the head.
Lard misses with an elbow over the top.
Lard's Muay Thai looks sharper than normal. He has obviously been working on it in the gym.
Lard working hard to break the clinch.
McDonald using the Thai plumb to throw knees but Lard has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
Lard throws a nice elbow but it doesn't land.
A head punch on the inside from McDonald fails to land.
A left hand lands to the body for Lard.
Lard tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Lard blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.
Lard tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
McDonald looking to slow down the pace here.

McDonald pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat.
Lard walks into a jab.
Ouch! a nice leg kick from Lard, right into the meat.
Lard connects with a body shot.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

A close second round but Ronald McDonald will probably get the nod - 10:9.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action!

McDonald ducks right into an uppercut from Lard.
McDonald's leg has a nasty welt from taking a succession of leg kicks. That must be slowing him down.
Lard scores with a leg kick.
A head kick misses from Lard.
McDonald throws a right high kick that is partially blocked by Lard.
Lard takes a body punch that cleary hurt but he's trying not to show any weakness.
Lard misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
McDonald throws a hook to the side of Lard's head but Lard sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
Lard scores with a three punch combo!

McDonald is rocked!
McDonald swings for the body but Lard moves out of range.
A thudding body kick lands there by Lard!
Lard throws a leg kick but he was too far away and it doesn't land.
McDonald on the wrong end of a nice jab.
McDonald is still on wobbly legs! Can Lard finish him?
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Lard throws a nasty head kick that just misses. He throws another kick to the head of his opponent and almost takes it off! McDonald crumples to the floor and the fight is over!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 0:50 of round 3, we have a winner by way of KO (Head Kick). Tubo Lard!
Tubo Lard seemed lost for words in his post fight interview but he remembered to thank his fans and directed everyone to his website.