PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Enormous Butt (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and John Wick (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Butt comes to the cage accompanied by Fat Bottomed Girl's-Queen. I don't know about you partner, but I'm pumped for this one!

Butt
vs
Wick

190 cm
23
260 lbs
3 - 5 - 0

200 cm
28
273 lbs
5 - 5 - 0

Decent wrestler
Excellent boxer
Very strong

Decent wrestler
Excellent boxer
Powerful

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 3 - 5 - 0, fighting out of New York, Enormous Butt!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 5 - 5 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, John Wick!
The judges for this bout are John Kavanagh, Anthony Taglia and Jorge Garcia.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Wick takes a jab on the nose there. A little bit of blood seems to be coming out. Hopefully that won't affect his breathing.
Butt circles away from the clinch attempt.
Wick scores with a reasonable looking shot to the body. Butt doesn't seem bothered though.
The sound of bone on bone echoes around the arena as Butt checks a leg kick.
Nice uppercut lands for Wick. That snapped Butt's head back.

It looks like Enormous Butt has been cut.
Some wild striking there from Butt.
Butt avoids a punch combination nicely.
Butt lunges at Wick with a hook that half lands and is half blocked by Wick's hand.
Butt throws a right and a left that both miss.
A punch combination from Butt misses.
Butt throws the left hand but Wick avoids the punch easily.

Wick closes the distance and gets a trip takedown into side control. Butt quickly recovers to half guard.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Butt is looking to escape.
Wick tries to stand and escape but Butt is controlling the position.
Wick wants to take a breather but Butt is having none of it.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Wick is looking to advance position but Butt won't allow it.
Butt pushes Wick off looking to stand but Wick dives back in and keeps control.
Wick content to control rather than advance.

That's one minute gone in the round.

Wick is trying to work for a kimura. This could be trouble! No, Butt has managed to free his arm - good work.
Wick performing his best blanket impression for a moment.
Wick stops Butt from getting back to his feet.
Butt tries to push off, looking to stand up, but Wick manages to move to mount!
My spies in Bi-Polar Asylum LV's #1 Public Training Center inform me that Wick has been getting involved in the gym's BJJ sparring sessions. Let's see whether that pays dividends!
Butt is trying to stand.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
My god... these two guys really need to pick up the pace or everyone will leave to go get a beer.
Wick trying to control but he's not successful this time.
We've been hearing good reports from Butt's training camp. Apparently he has been rolling around with some good quality BJJ practitioners and has been sharpening his skills. Let's see if that has an impact on the fight today.
Butt wants to get back to his feet.
Wick dominating with strikes here.

Wick has control of Butt's right arm, working for a kimura. It's a bit of a token attempt though and Butt regains control of the situation pretty easily.
Wick won't let Butt get back to his feet... He wants to keep the fight where it is for now.
Wick with the ground and pound from mount.
Butt is trying to stand up.

Wick with some aggressive grappling here. He's looking for submissions here, rather than waiting for the opportunity to counter.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Butt is trying to escape but when you're mounted that's not too easy.
Wick with a couple of short strikes.
Butt in a bad spot here, taking shots to the head.

Enormous Butt's cut is getting worse.

Wick is standing up out of mount! Strange tactic there - he must really want this one on the feet!
Wick fakes with a right hand and throws a good leg kick, right into the thigh. That had to hurt Butt.
A good leg kick by Wick.
Butt misses with a looping right.
Wick throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Butt jabs. That one connects to the head of his opponent.
Butt ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Wick moves away.
Butt throws a series of punches but Wick avoids them all with ease.
Enormous Butt is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Wick throws a right hand that Butt ducks under and follows up with a left that Butt also avoids with ease.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Some bone on bone action there as Butt checks a low kick. Luckily it wasn't a particularly hard one.
Butt fails to land with a series of punches.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Wick avoids the body shot from Butt.
Wick throws a leg kick but Butt sees it coming and moves out of range.
A telegraphed right hand from Wick misses the target.
Wick takes a body punch that cleary hurt but he's trying not to show any weakness.
Wick throws a decent looking leg kick but it doesn't land clean.
Wick shoots in but Butt avoids the takedown attempt easily.
Butt was looking to counter that last move with a shot to the body but he didn't commit.
Butt scores with a sloppy punch to the body. Not much technique there but it did the business.
Butt looks to land a left hand but Wick moved out of range nicely.
And Wick tries to counter it with a takedown but Butt pushes his down on his head and steps out.
Wick throws out a leg kick but Butt moves out of range and Wick only half commits.
Butt tries to bum rush Wick with a series of wild strikes but Wick uses good footwork to avoid the assault.
Butt uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Wick.
Wick throws a right high kick that is partially blocked by Butt.

Enormous Butt's cut is bleeding quite badly. He's got to try and protect it.
Butt misses with a few strikes there.
Butt slips in close and lands a nice hook before moving back out of range.
Wick wants to clinch.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

John Wick dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Enormous Butt's cut.
OK. That's time! The bell goes and we're back to the action.

Wick misses with the combination.
A combination from Wick does no damage.
Butt feints a jab promting Wick to slip. Butt then demonstrates his capabilities by jabbing again. Wick slips again and ducks right into an uppercut.
Wick throws a sloppy head kick and Butt moves out of range easily.
Wow, both these guys are really going for it!

Wick clinches up against the cage.
Butt on the defensive, avoiding the knees to the body.
Butt tries to break free but Wick pushes him back against the cage.
Butt is trying to break free.
Wick goes for a takedown in the clinch but Butt prevents it.

Butt manages to break the clinch.
Wick is looking to take this fight into the clinch.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Wick scores with a nice head shot.
Wick tries to land a leg kick but Butt saw it coming and moves away.
Enormous Butt is looking to throw some combinations by the looks of things.
Wick tries to close the distance and clinch up against the cage but Butt paws at him with a jab and circles away.
Butt fails to land with a series of punches.
Wick slips a jab and a cross from Butt.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Butt ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Wick moves away.

Wick moves into range and clinches up with Butt.
Wick scores a nice knee to the body.
Both fighters are absolutely exhausted here.
Butt wants to break the clinch but can't.

Butt breaks from the clinch.
Butt takes a swing at Wick's ribcage but misses.
Wick scores with a hook.
Wick lands with a slapping head kick.

Jeez, Enormous Butt's cut is really nasty now. The referee must be thinking about getting that checked.

The referee calls the doctor in to look at Enormous Butt's cut. Oh no, the doctor has called an end to the bout!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:30 of round 2, we have a winner by way of TKO (Cut). John Wick!
John Wick gave a mention to Mohito Fightwear (Laundry) in his post fight interview. That will please them (and hopefully generate some sales).
Enormous Butt was interviewed post fight and said 'I wonder how much he paid the ref?'.