PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Otis Whittaker (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Tommy Thundercunt (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Thundercunt has chosen You are a Cunt as his entrance music, which hasn't gone down very well with the crowd. This should be a great matchup!

Whittaker
vs
Thundercunt

200 cm
26
250 lbs
8 - 1 - 0

197 cm
25
260 lbs
6 - 0 - 0

BJJ White Belt
Excellent boxer
Very quick

Decent wrestler
Great elbows
Good gas tank

Sully's Bar & Grill

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, for the heavyweight championship of the world!
Introducing the champion to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 8 - 1 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Otis Whittaker!
And introducing the challenger to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 6 - 0 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Tommy Thundercunt!
The judges for this bout are David Hoff, Winston Alpacca and Sandra Marshall.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!

Whittaker closes the distance and pushes Thundercunt back into the cage.
Whittaker scores with a shot to the side of Thundercunt's head.
Whittaker prevents Thundercunt from breaking the clinch.
Whittaker is trying to maintain a safe position but Thundercunt gets an underhook and turns Whittaker into the cage.
Whittaker prevents Thundercunt from breaking the clinch.
Thundercunt blocks an uppercut.
Whittaker blocks an elbow strike.
Whittaker trying to control the position but instead, Thundercunt has worked for underhooks and has pushed Whittaker into the cage.
Whittaker working aggressively here.
Thundercunt lands with a left to the head.

Thundercunt manages to break the clinch.
Thundercunt moves out of range as Whittaker strikes.
Thundercunt throws a big shot that misses.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Whittaker misses the jab.
Thundercunt jabs. That one connects to the head of his opponent.

It looks like Otis Whittaker has been cut.
Whittaker misses with a hook.
Whittaker misses with a hook. Thundercunt ducked under it nicely.
Whittaker defending well as Thundercunt loads up on a big left hand.
Whittaker was looking to counter that move with a punch but didn't quite pull the trigger.
Thundercunt throws an uppercut from half a mile away. Whittaker sees it coming and avoids it easily.
Whittaker is looking to counter punch.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Whittaker tries to bum rush Thundercunt with a series of wild strikes but Thundercunt uses good footwork to avoid the assault.
Whittaker tries to grapple but his opponent circles
and Thundercunt connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
Thundercunt drops a shoulder and throws an uppercut that cracks Whittaker right on the button. Whittaker goes down! Thundercunt follows him to the mat and finishes the job with more strikes! Thundercunt gets the win via TKO!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:22 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Tommy Thundercunt! Tommy Thundercunt retains his heavyweight title!
Tommy Thundercunt bigged himself up after the win. The crowd seemed to love it.
Otis Whittaker spoke after the fight, saying 'I felt the tingle, again. Congrats Theo and Ryan!'.