PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a welterweight MMA rules bout between Turd Anderson (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Thomas Watson (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Turd Anderson has the better chin. Will he look to stand and bang today?

Anderson
vs
Watson

180 cm
40
184 lbs
33 - 21 - 3

179 cm
44
175 lbs
29 - 17 - 1

Abu Dhabi Champ
Excellent boxer
Granite chin

Good wrestler
Lethal high kicks
Heavy handed

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the welterweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 33 - 21 - 3, fighting out of Helsinki, Turd Anderson!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 29 - 17 - 1, fighting out of Tokyo, Thomas Watson!
The judges for this bout are Jack Bonds, Frank Antenori and .

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Anderson slips a jab from Watson.

Watson clinches with his opponent.
Watson just leaning against Anderson, taking a breather.
Watson fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Watson lands a body shot.
Anderson wants to get back to striking at distance but Watson won't allow it.
Anderson blocking some punches.
Watson fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Anderson misses with a shot to the kidneys.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Watson wants to take the fight to the mat but Anderson manages to get underhooks and keep the fight in the clinch.

Watson has Anderson pressed up against the cage. He's trying to work for a single leg takedown. Watson pulls back from the cage and twists to the side, sending Anderson tumbling to the mat - Watson dives into Anderson's guard.
Watson stopping the sweep attempt from Anderson.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Watson cracks Anderson with a solid left hand.
Anderson looking to hit a scissor sweep but Watson is one step ahead there.
Watson lands a couple of elbows.
Watson preventing the sweep.
There's a bit of a scramble here and now Anderson is on top in guard.

Anderson pressing down on his opponent's thigh, looking to pass guard. Watson is keeping the position for now.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Anderson is taking a break and basically stalling. The referee will not allow him to do that for long.
Anderson chips away with some ground and pound.
Watson pulls Anderson in close to prevent any damage.
Watson looking for a sweep. Not yet Watson, not yet.
Anderson postures up to throw the ground and pound strikes but they don't connect.

Watson pushes Anderson off for just long enough to get back to his feet. Very athletic spring there.
Anderson scores with a one two! Watson had his feet all tangled up there and couldn't avoid the strikes.
Watson fails in his attempt to clinch.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Watson tries to clinch up.
Anderson is looking to counter with a shot to the body.
Watson uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Anderson.
Watson looks like he wants to counter punch here.
Watson tries to clinch up but Anderson circles away and keeps his distance.
Anderson swings for the body but Watson moves out of range.
Anderson lands a slapping body shot.
Watson is on the wrong end of a nice combination from Anderson.
Anderson scores with a shot to the body.
Anderson bobbing and weaving, closes the distance and lands a hook to the side of Watson's head.
Anderson looks to land a combination but Watson avoids it well.
Watson fails with an attempt to clinch.
It looked like Anderson was trying to counter with a body shot coming off that last attack from Watson.
Anderson lands a nice hook to Watson's body. Watson takes it in his stride and looks to land his own strikes.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Anderson sizes up Watson with a pawing jab and scores with a straight right down the middle.
Watson lands with a straight right. Anderson didn't see that one coming.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Anderson just misses with a punch to the body.
Watson tries to close the distance and clinch up but Anderson swats him away and circles back towards the center.
Anderson misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Watson.

Anderson darts in and lands a nice takedown into half guard.
Watson is looking to escape.
Watson is doing well to avoid being mounted. He's controlling the position at the moment.

Anderson wants to work for an arm triangle but Watson is really keeping half guard well and defending the submission attempt.

Watson manages to create a bit of space in order to work his way back to his feet. Anderson keeps hold of his opponent and drives him back against the cage.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Turd Anderson dominated that round.
The referee calls time. The cornermen exit stage left and we're back to business.

Watson misses with a straight right.

Watson fakes with an overhand right and moves in to clinch with Anderson, pushing him back against the cage.
Anderson wants to break free. God knows he wants to breaaaak freeee.
Watson has Anderson pressed against the cage, preventing Anderson from circling away and getting back to striking at range.
Watson tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Anderson's elbow.
A short left from Watson.
Watson misses with a punch on the inside.
Watson tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Watson stalls.
Watson has a couple of punches blocked by Anderson.
Some stalling of biblical proportions here from Watson.
Watson drops to a knee looking for a takedown but Anderson gets the underhooks and prevents it.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Watson swings wildly with an uppercut but Anderson uses good head movement to avoid it.
Watson working aggressively here.
Watson stalling in the clinch.
Anderson tries to circle away but Watson has him pinned against the cage.
Watson swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Anderson blocks an uppercut.
Watson swings wildly with an uppercut but Anderson uses good head movement to avoid it.
Watson working on landing some head shots here - that one got through nicely.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Anderson is pressed up against the cage. Watson has hold of a leg and is looking to drag Anderson down to the mat. Anderson avoids the attempt though and has circled away. We're back to striking at a distance.
Watson shoots in looking for a takedown. Anderson tries to sprawl out of it but Watson keeps driving through. The fighters are pinned against the cage. Anderson manages to get underhooks and after a bit of a struggle, circles away and we're back to standing.
Anderson is looking to counter punch.
Turd Anderson has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Thomas Watson.
Watson rushes in with a sloppy looking punch
and Anderson counters with a lovely shot to the body.
Anderson throws a shot from downtown. Watson moves away and avoids it.
Watson wants to clinch.
Anderson with a lazy takedown attempt
and Watson cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
Watson misses with a left hand
and Anderson counters with a right hand to the body.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Anderson slips in close and lands a nice hook before moving back out of range.
Watson uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by Anderson.
Anderson fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Watson manages to avoid it.
Watson misses with a wild body shot.
A decent looking cross lands there for Watson.
Watson tries to clinch but is not successful on this occasion.

Watson darts in and clinches Anderson up against the cage.
Watson misses with a hook to the ribs.
Anderson is struggling to control the position.

Anderson turns his back and goes for a hip toss. It's a bit messy but it gets the job done and Anderson manages to end up in side control.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Watson tries to escape but Anderson is in control.
Watson struggling a bit here.
Watson is trying to stand back up. He's worked his way up against the cage but Anderson has just dragged him back down to the mat.
An elbow from Anderson crashes against the mat.
Watson manages to get back to half guard.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Anderson slows the pace down in half guard.
Anderson throws a big elbow that misses, also allowing Watson to regain full guard.
The crowd thankful this round is nearly over.
Watson wants to sweep here but Anderson controlling him for the moment.
Anderson sneaks a leg through and gets to half guard. That was like a knife through butter how easily he passed Watson's guard.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Thomas Watson showed his class in that round. I'd imagine he'll take it on all the scorecards.
The minute break is over - no more time for sponges and pep talks - back to the action! So, we enter the final round. Let's see if either fighter can bring us a finish, or whether we're going to the judges scorecards.

A looping hook to the body misses from Anderson. Watson does a little dance to reset his feet.
Anderson misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Watson.
Watson tries to clinch but is not successful on this occasion.
Anderson swung with a counter punch to the body but it didn't connect.
Watson fails with an attempt to clinch.
Anderson appears to be looking for a counter takedown.
Anderson throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Watson swings away with a counter right hand but no contact made.
Anderson is looking to wear down Watson with body shots, infact he's throwing more body shots than head shots at the moment.
Anderson jabbing away but nothing is landing.
A looping hook to the body misses from Anderson. Watson does a little dance to reset his feet.
Nice uppercut lands for Anderson. That snapped Watson's head back.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.

Watson gets a clinch.
The two fighters are working to gain dominance in the clinch.
Anderson blocks a couple of punches on the inside.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Watson tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Watson misses with some punches.
Watson can't get the takedown.
Watson misses with a body punch.
Good anti-grappling being displayed by Watson as Anderson tries to tie him up.

Watson turns his hips and lands a very nice judo throw into side control!
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
Anderson tries to improve position but can't.
Anderson manages to get one leg in to regain half guard.
Anderson makes his way to full guard. A much better position for Anderson.
Anderson keeping moving, preventing Watson from controlling successfully.

That's two minutes gone in the round.

Watson throws a sloppy strike and Anderson has hooked up an armbar on the loose arm! He's turned and extended fully! Watson is forced to tap! Great BJJ from Anderson!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 2:24 of round 3, we have a winner by way of Submission (Armbar). Turd Anderson!
A very excited looking Turd Anderson made sure he remembered to thank all the fans both in the arena and on the internet. He said all the coolest people spend all day on MMA websites, which got a big reaction.