PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight kickboxing rules bout between Yormomza Thundercunt (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Bliss Oblivion (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). These two fighters really are very evenly matched on the feet - it will be fascinating to see who can assert themselves in that aspect of the fight.

Thundercunt
vs
Oblivion

225 cm
18
300 lbs
0 - 0 - 0

199 cm
18
290 lbs
0 - 1 - 0

Excellent MT
Big right hand

Excellent MT
Determined

Hellraiser FightGear

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 0 - 0 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Yormomza Thundercunt!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 0 - 1 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Bliss Oblivion!
The judges for this bout are Bart Greer, Daniel Franklin and David Hoff.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Oblivion misses with a head kick.
Oblivion should think about turning a few of those tyres round his middle into muscle if he wants people to take him seriously as an athlete.
Thundercunt tries to close the distance and clinch up but Oblivion swats him away and circles back towards the center.
Oblivion throws a leg kick but Thundercunt checks it.
Thundercunt tries to clinch but Oblivion moves out of range.
Oblivion looks like he wanted to counter with a high kick but didn't throw it.
Oblivion fakes with the hands and throws a leg kick but Thundercunt is out of range.
Thundercunt tries to close the distance and clinch but Oblivion swats him to one side with an open hand palm strike and circles away.
Oblivion tries to counter by closing the distance.

Thundercunt moves into range and clinches up with Oblivion.
Thundercunt throws a blind hook that connects with the side of Oblivions head.
Oblivion looking to throw knees to the head but Thundercunt is blocking nicely.
Oblivion using the Thai plumb to throw knees but Thundercunt has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
Oblivion is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. Thundercunt is defending well for now.
Thundercunt scores with a shoulder strike.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
With the fighters clinched against the cage, Thundercunt creates a bit of distance for himself and scores with a nice uppercut.
Oblivion's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
Oblivion tries to land knees in the clinch but Thundercunt avoids the damage to the body.
Thundercunt fails to land with a short punch on the inside.

Thundercunt pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Thundercunt lands a jab to the nose.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Thundercunt is looking to clinch but Oblivion is avoiding it.
Thundercunt lands with a cross.

It looks like Bliss Oblivion has been cut.
Oblivion doesn't manage to clinch there - Thundercunt circles away.

Oblivion walks into a straight right hand and goes down! Thundercunt rushes to a neutral corner so the count doesn't get delayed but Oblivion has made it back to his feet on 5. He's OK so we're back to the action.
Thundercunt avoids a kick to the body.

Thundercunt clinches up against the cage.
Oblivion tries to land a knee to the body but he is off balance and Thundercunt avoids it.
Oblivion tries to land knees in the clinch but Thundercunt avoids the damage to the body.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Oblivion's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
Thundercunt softening up his opponent with strikes, against the cage.
Oblivion is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. Thundercunt is defending well for now.
Oblivion looks winded!
Thundercunt stays in close to his opponent and throws a right hand to the body.
Oblivion blocks an uppercut.
Thundercunt working aggressively here.
Thundercunt misses with a hook to the ribs.
Oblivion is working hard here but doesn't seem to be able to control effectively, up against the cage.
Thundercunt swings wildly with an uppercut but Oblivion uses good head movement to avoid it.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Oblivion tries to land knees in the clinch but Thundercunt avoids the damage to the body.
Thundercunt has a couple of punches blocked by Oblivion.
Thundercunt goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
Thundercunt throws a punch but it's blocked by Oblivion.
Oblivion blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Thundercunt misses with a punch on the inside.
Oblivion tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
Oblivion missing with knees to the body.
A quick uppercut on the inside from Thundercunt.
Thundercunt tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.

Oblivion pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat.

Thundercunt takes the fight into the clinch.
A shot in the inside from Thundercunt.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Oblivion.
Thundercunt swings wildly with an uppercut but Oblivion uses good head movement to avoid it.
Oblivion missing with knees to the body.
Thundercunt lands a nice uppercut.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Thundercunt lands a shot to the body.
A shot in the inside from Thundercunt.
A nice right hand lands inside from Thundercunt.
Thundercunt lands a nice looking hook to the body, against the cage.
Oblivion's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
Thundercunt lands a nice uppercut.
Thundercunt creates a bit of distance and cracks Oblivion with a big uppercut! Oblivion goes down! The referee pushes Thundercunt away into a neutral corner and starts the count. 4,5,6,7. Will Oblivion make it up in time? He's still flopping around all over the place! The referee has called off the fight! Thundercunt takes it!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3:29 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Punch). Yormomza Thundercunt!
A victorious Yormomza Thundercunt thanked his army of followers in his post fight interview, telling people to make sure they follow him on Twitter.