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PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a middleweight MMA rules bout between Benedict Arnold (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Howard Stern (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Stern is bouncing up and down as he enters the arena, backed by The Great American Nightmare. Buckle up people - heeeeeeeeeere we go!



187 cm
32
188 lbs
19 - 9 - 2
184 cm
31
199 lbs
23 - 12 - 1
Good wrestling
World class boxer
Insanely flexible
Excellent grappler
Excellent MT
Granite chin


Humanoid Nutrition (160Q for 160$)


Perkele!
Humanoid Nutrition (160Q for 160$)


Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the middleweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 19 - 9 - 2, fighting out of Los Angeles, Benedict Arnold!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 23 - 12 - 1, fighting out of Las Vegas, Howard Stern!
The judges for this bout are James Ackerman, Steven Brown and William Gold.




The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Stern shoots in and drives through. Arnold sprawls well.
Arnold misses with a hook.
Stern lands a jab.
Arnold tests Stern's chin there with a solid looking shot.
Arnold takes a punch right to his stomach. That took the wind out of him momentarily.
Good leg kick by Arnold there. It's the ones that make that thud noise that hurt and that was an almighty thud.
Arnold motions for Stern to come forward. Arnold throws a leg kick but it misses it's target.
Arnold lands a nice shot that snaps Stern's head back.

Arnold gets caught flat footed, as Stern shoots in with a quick takedown into guard.
Stern stands up and looks to throw the legs aside to pass to side control. Arnold swivels though and keeps the full guard.
Both fighters have adopted an aggressive gameplan on the ground!
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Stern wants to control from the top but Arnold keeps moving.
Arnold seems keen to control rather than go for a submission, at least for now.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Stern stands up and looks to throw the legs aside to pass to side control. Arnold swivels though and keeps the full guard.
Arnold managing to control the position.
Stern stands up and looks to throw the legs aside to pass to side control. Arnold swivels though and keeps the full guard.
Stern trying to control but Arnold is working from the bottom.
Arnold pulls Stern in close to prevent any damage.
Stern wants to control from the top but Arnold keeps moving.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are getting on the fighters' backs, as the pace has dropped off in the last minute or so.

The referee decides to stand the fighters back up.

Stern shoots in for a takedown! He's got it and he's managed to land in side control! That's better than Stern was expecting from the takedown attempt, I'm sure!
Arnold tries to get back to his feet but has found himself mounted instead. Damn, that's gotta suck.
Arnold tries to hold on but Stern postures up.
Stern forces the positional change into back control.
Stern has good solid back control here.
Arnold is defending well here and trying to improve his position.
Stern is looking cool and calm here, just waiting for a good opportunity to attack and finish the fight from this dominant position.

That's three minutes gone in the round.

Stern is staying calm and holding on to the back position, whilst working on a rear naked choke. Arnold is defending well though. Stern let's go of the attempt for now.
Arnold staying busy and making it hard for Stern to control.
Stern might have to switch it up a bit here because his efforts to control Arnold haven't been going to plan, at least at the current moment in time.
Stern is not going to allow Arnold to sit and survive in this position.
Arnold turns into Stern and is now in his guard.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Stern looking for a sweep. Not yet Stern, not yet.
Arnold engaging in some classic timewasting tactics.
Stern looking to sweep here. No luck so far.
Stern seems keen to control Arnold's posture.

Stern looking for submissions from the bottom here. Moving his hips around, possibly looking for an armbar.
Arnold preventing the sweep.
Stern is still trying to improve position.
Arnold is frustrating his opponent with some stalling tactics from top position.
Arnold wanted to stand there but Stern had control of the position.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
Arnold showing good wrestling skills to control the position.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

A close round but Howard Stern will probably get the nod.
The fighters get back to their feet, the hooter sounds and we're back to the action!


Arnold lands with a cross.
Arnold's corner calls for a 1-2. Arnold obliges with the 1 part as he scores the single shot and moves back out of range.
Stern getting the better of the striking in that exchange.

Stern fakes a strike and closes the distance, dragging Arnold to the ground. Stern is now in Arnold's guard.
In the pre-fight buildup videos we saw Stern working his ground and pound in the gym. He isn't landing a great percentage of his ground strikes so far though.
Arnold has a closed guard, preventing anything of note from happening. Perhaps he's looking to stall.
Arnold keeping full guard, as Stern tries to pass.
Stern trying to control but Arnold is working from the bottom.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Arnold controlling Stern's posture.
Arnold keeping full guard, as Stern tries to pass.
Arnold has a closed guard, preventing anything of note from happening. Perhaps he's looking to stall.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Arnold is trying to keep Stern in close.
Stern passes Arnold's right leg, so he's now in half guard.
Stern seems very keen to just sit and control from half guard but Arnold does not like that idea so much and is remaining active off his back.
Arnold trying to control here.
Stern wants to take a breather but Arnold is having none of it.
Arnold controlling the position well.
Stern is trying to control the action in half guard but Arnold is working away on the bottom, looking perhaps to get back to full guard.
Arnold keeping hold of Stern's head, controlling as best he can.
Arnold is looking to control Stern's leg but it's slowly edging free. Can Arnold avoid being mounted?

That's two minutes gone in the round.
A few boos can be heard. I'm sure they will multiply if the fighters don't pick up the pace.
Stern is pressing down on Arnold's thigh, looking to free his foot. Arnold is holding on for now.
Stern is keen to just control but Arnold is a slippery customer.
Stern prevents Arnold from improving his position.
Arnold avoiding damage under a succession of punches from Stern.
Arnold trying to control from the bottom.

The ref stands the fighters back up due to a lack of activity.
Stern throws a shot from downtown. Arnold moves away and avoids it.
Arnold leaves Stern with his face pressed against the mat as he sprawls beautifully, defending against a solid takedown attempt.
Stern tests Arnold's chin there with a solid looking shot.
Stern throws a nice looking combination but Arnold bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Stern blocks a jab.
Arnold scores with a nice right hand.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Arnold looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Stern wants to counter with a clinch but Arnold pushes him away.
Arnold takes a shot to the eye socket. That's gotta hurt.
Howard Stern seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Some bone on bone action there as Arnold checks a low kick. Luckily it wasn't a particularly hard one.
The fighters circling - Arnold throws out the jab but it was never going to land.
Good standup being displayed there by Stern as he connects with a hook.
A cross from Arnold lands.
Arnold looks to land a right hand but Stern moved out of range.
Stern lands a head shot.
A shot to the liver by Stern. Beautiful body shot.
A big right from Stern misses.
Arnold was looking to counter that move with a punch but didn't quite pull the trigger.
Stern dips down and scores with a jab to the body.
Stern fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
Arnold is looking to counter punch.
Howard Stern seems to be getting the better of the standup.
Arnold takes a body punch but keeps moving.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Arnold moves out of range as Stern strikes.
Stern slips a jab from Arnold.
Arnold showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Stern.
Benedict Arnold is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Stern avoids the body shot from Arnold.
Arnold defending well as Stern loads up on a big left hand.
Stern misses with a straight left.
Arnold half committed to a counter leg kick.
Stern throws an off balance right hand
enabling Arnold to counter with a crisp jab.
Arnold displays good takedown defense there as he swats away a double leg from Stern.
Stern connects with a hook to the side of his opponent's head.
Arnold has his hands up protecting his head but a hook from Stern finds it's way round the side to connect with Arnold's head.
Stern gets his takedown attempt stuffed easily
and Arnold counters with a stiff right hand.
Benedict Arnold has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Howard Stern.
Arnold looks to land a right hand but Stern moved out of range.
Arnold scores with a jab to the head.
Stern shoots in for a takedown. "I don't think so" says Arnold as he avoids it easily.
Arnold goes for a high kick. It partially lands.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

A close second round but Howard Stern will probably get the nod - 10:9.
That's the end of the interval. I'm sure that seemed a lot quicker than a minute for our two fighters! Back to the action. This is the final round!


Stern steps to the side to avoid the strikes from Arnold.


It looks like Howard Stern has been cut.
Arnold swings for the body but Stern moves out of range.
Arnold throws an uppercut from half a mile away. Stern sees it coming and avoids it easily.
Arnold's hands are dropping dangerously low here and Stern connects clean with a right hook that sends him down to one knee! Arnold scrambles back to his feet.
Stern moves away from the strike by Arnold.
Stern throws out a powerful jab.
Stern rushes in with a sloppy looking punch
and Arnold counters with a nice uppercut.
Stern might want to mix his strikes up a bit more. He's just going for head shots at the moment and that can become a bit predictable.
Arnold blocks a jab.
Stern throws a two punch combo that lands nicely.
Stern misses with a series of wild punches.
A jab from Stern misses.
Arnold lands with a straight right. Stern didn't see that one coming.
Stern lands a right hook to the body.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Arnold misses with a head kick.
Arnold with a hook.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Arnold waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Stern.
Stern keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Arnold.
Arnold does a little shimmy and throws a leg kick. The leg kick missed by a considerable margin though, making him look a little bit silly for doing the shimmy.
Stern moves out of range as Arnold strikes.
Stern on the wrong end of a decent looking cross there.
Stern connects with a jab.
Stern misses with a wild combination.
An attempted straight right counter from Arnold misses the target.
Stern misses with a lunging right hand
and Stern takes a counter punch right on the button for his troubles.
Stern misses with a looping left.
Arnold moves out of range of the strikes.
A nice leg kick lands there from Arnold.
Arnold throws a big shot that misses.
Nice uppercut lands for Stern. That snapped Arnold's head back.
Arnold uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from Stern.
Stern misses with a takedown attempt
and Arnold counters with a shot to the ribs. That looked like it hurt.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
A slapping leg kick lands for Arnold.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Arnold staying out of range there.
Nice defenses there by Stern.
Arnold misses with a low kick.
Stern looks like he wants to counter punch here.
Arnold throws a shot from downtown. Stern moves away and avoids it.
Stern scores with a reasonable looking shot to the body. Arnold doesn't seem bothered though.
Stern throws a hook but Arnold blocks it.
Arnold misses with a hook. Stern ducked under it nicely.
Stern misses with a combination
and Arnold connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
Stern throws a jab when Arnold was well out of range.
Stern is trying hard to land a takedown here. Arnold sprawls well and keeps this one on the feet.
Arnold lands a vicious shot with the stealth of a sniper and the strength of a viper. Are vipers that strong? I can think of lots of things that are stronger than a viper - not many rhyme with sniper though.
Stern shoots in for a takedown - he's clinched up with Arnold but Arnold pushes him off and we're back to square one.
Benedict Arnold has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Howard Stern.
Stern takes an uppercut right on the button but keeps his composure.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Arnold motions for Stern to come forward. Arnold throws a leg kick but it misses it's target.
Stern tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Arnold was well out of range. Poor timing from Stern.
Arnold lands with a shot to the body.
Stern fails to land with a series of punches.
Stern missing with a left hand there. Arnold was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
Arnold lands with a nice low kick. That'll leave a bruise.
Stern takes a body punch that cleary hurt but he's trying not to show any weakness.
Stern walks straight into an uppercut. Luckily it didn't land flush.
Arnold throws a leg kick but Stern checks it.
Stern wings a very wild body shot but it does the job and lands to the midsection.
A big left from Arnold misses.
Stern is loading up here, looking for a big counter of his own.

Stern closes the distance, clinches up and gets a nice trip takedown into side control. Very smooth.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Arnold stops Stern from passing to mount.
You can see the frustration on Arnold's face, being in this tough position on the bottom.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Arnold tries to buck Stern off but Stern is having none of it.
Arnold wants to control but Stern postures up.
Howard Stern is fighting for a decision - hopefully he's judged it right and he's actually winning the fight.
Stern is maintaining the dominant position - no doubt Arnold will start to get frustrated soon if he's not already.
Arnold is trying to improve his position.
Arnold wants to control but Stern postures up.
Stern trying to control the action but Arnold is working from the bottom.
Stern happy to just control the position for now.

And that's the end of the fight!
Benedict Arnold showed his dominance in that final round.
I think Stern has won this one but let's see whether the judges agree with me. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge James Ackerman scores the fight 28:29
Judge Steven Brown scores the fight 28:29
Judge William Gold scores the fight 29:29

In favor of your winner, by majority decision... Howard Stern!

Howard Stern took to the microphone after his victory and thanked his sponsors, Perkele! for their support in the buildup to the fight.
Benedict Arnold spoke after the fight, saying 'Stupid auto flight, free win for opponent'.
S C
A
G S C
B
G S C G energy
A | B
hype
A | B
pop
A | B
mgr
A | B
FIGHT
RATING
52%
 
 
 
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