PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between Dante Cross Furia (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and FannyPack SissyPants (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Chooooooooon! I think Cross Furia might be my favorite fighter, now he's come out to Vivaldi's Winter. SissyPants is bouncing up and down as he enters the arena, backed by Scooters. Dante Cross Furia has a significant reach advantage - let's see if he can make it count.

Cross Furia
vs
SissyPants

209 cm
31
276 lbs
23 - 12 - 1

194 cm
25
282 lbs
14 - 3 - 0

Great wrestler
World class boxer
Insanely flexible

Good wrestler
World class boxer
Good gas tank

Aspire Clothing
Zenith Nutrition (160q/225$)

Zenith Nutrition (160q/225$)

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 23 - 12 - 1, fighting out of Rio de Janeiro, Dante Cross Furia!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 14 - 3 - 0, fighting out of Tokyo, FannyPack SissyPants!
The judges for this bout are James Ackerman, Steven Brown and Colin Fotheringham.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
SissyPants stumbles momentarily as he takes a strong leg kick from Cross Furia.
Cross Furia with a jab.
SissyPants swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Cross Furia throws out a loose jab but SissyPants uses good head movement to avoid it.
Cross Furia looks to have improved his striking defense since last time we saw him fight.
Cross Furia scoring well with a low kick there.
Wow, both these guys are really going for it!
A looping hook to the body misses from SissyPants. Cross Furia does a little dance to reset his feet.
Cross Furia throws a body punch but SissyPants moves out of range.
SissyPants connects with a hook to the side of his opponent's head.

It looks like Dante Cross Furia has been cut.
SissyPants circles away from the clinch attempt.
Cross Furia keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Cross Furia looking to take his opponent's legs away with the low kicks.
Cross Furia with a nice looking leg kick. You could hear that one land in a back row.
Cross Furia connects with a nice looking jab.
SissyPants connects with a slap. Keep your fist closed son.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
SissyPants wings a very wild body shot but it does the job and lands to the midsection.
SissyPants ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Cross Furia moves away.
Cross Furia doesn't react quick enough there as he takes a shot to the body.
SissyPants fakes high and swings low for a body shot but Cross Furia manages to avoid it.
No joy there for Cross Furia, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
SissyPants lands three nice shots there - that looked like it hurt!
A good leg kick by SissyPants.

That's one minute gone in the round.
SissyPants misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Cross Furia.
SissyPants is throwing a lot of body shots here, looking to wear down Cross Furia rather than just go for the knockout.
SissyPants works Cross Furia's body with a nice hook.
SissyPants takes one on the chin but keeps coming.
SissyPants scores with a sloppy punch to the body. Not much technique there but it did the business.
Some wild striking there from SissyPants.

SissyPants moves into range and clinches up with Cross Furia.
SissyPants tries to land knees in the clinch but Cross Furia avoids the damage to the body.
Cross Furia scores with a shot to the side of SissyPants's head.
SissyPants working some nice short punches in the clinch.
Cross Furia fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Cross Furia avoids the elbow strike from SissyPants, against the cage.
SissyPants doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Cross Furia lands a hook to the side of the head.
Nice body punch from SissyPants - that landed with a thud.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
A head punch blocked on the inside by SissyPants.
SissyPants scores with an uppercut up the middle.
SissyPants misses with a hook from the clinch.
A short uppercut from Cross Furia.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
SissyPants lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of Cross Furia backwards.
SissyPants misses with a punch to the body.
Cross Furia misses with the head strike.
Cross Furia swings away with an uppercut that misses.
We've been informed that SissyPants has been sparring a lot of Muay Thai in the buildup to this fight so let's see if that has an impact on the result.
Cross Furia misses with a hook from the clinch.
A short right from Cross Furia on the inside.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Cross Furia.
A nice left hand lands by Cross Furia.
SissyPants throws an elbow but it misses.
SissyPants gets through Cross Furia's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head.
Cross Furia tries a body shot but SissyPants blocks it.
Cross Furia tries to work over SissyPants's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Still in the clinch, Cross Furia scores with a nice short uppercut.
Cross Furia throws a head punch that misses.
SissyPants misses with a punch to the body.
SissyPants tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
SissyPants misses with a punch on the inside.
SissyPants misses with a punch to the body.
A body shot lands from Cross Furia.
Cross Furia misses with some punches.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Cross Furia misses with a punch to the body.
SissyPants tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Cross Furia's elbow.
Cross Furia misses with the head strike.
Cross Furia can't find room to land a body shot as SissyPants controls the action.
Cross Furia lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of SissyPants backwards.
SissyPants tries to land knees in the clinch but Cross Furia avoids the damage to the body.
SissyPants tries to throw a body punch but Cross Furia avoids it by throwing SissyPants back against the cage.
SissyPants lands a left hand.
Cross Furia works for underhooks and lands a body shot in the process.
Cross Furia misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Cross Furia lands on the inside with an uppercut.
Cross Furia working on landing some head shots here - that one got through nicely.
Cross Furia gets through SissyPants's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head.
SissyPants has a couple of punches blocked by Cross Furia.
SissyPants tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
SissyPants doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
SissyPants lands on the inside with an uppercut.
Nice body punch from SissyPants - that landed with a thud.
Cross Furia can't find room to land a body shot as SissyPants controls the action.
Cross Furia misses with a punch on the inside.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
This has been an exciting period of action!
SissyPants blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Cross Furia pushes SissyPants back against the cage and lands a hook to the side of the head.
A head punch on the inside from SissyPants fails to land.
SissyPants tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Cross Furia pushes SissyPants back against the cage and unloads with a body punch.
Cross Furia blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.
SissyPants lands a left hand.
Cross Furia misses with a hook to the ribs.
SissyPants lands with a short shot to the head.
A shot in the inside from Cross Furia.
A left hand lands to the body for Cross Furia.
SissyPants looks winded!
Cross Furia pushes SissyPants back against the cage and lands a hook to the side of the head.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Cross Furia.
Cross Furia misses with a hook from the clinch.
SissyPants blocks a body shot from Cross Furia.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
The fighters are starting to get sweaty, which will make takedowns a bit more tricky.
SissyPants tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
SissyPants working aggressively here.
Cross Furia misses with a short punch on the inside.
A shot in the inside from Cross Furia.
SissyPants throws a head punch that misses.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

That was a close round but I would say that Dante Cross Furia will probably get the nod.
The cut man is working on Dante Cross Furia's cut.
OK. That's time! The bell goes and we're back to the action.

SissyPants ducks under an overhand right and circles away with a smile on his face.
SissyPants avoids the clinch attempt nicely.
SissyPants just misses with a punch to the body.
Cross Furia paws at his opponent with the jab and then lunges in with a straight, right on the button.
SissyPants on the wrong end of a nice low kick. He's acting like it's no big deal but he doesn't want to take many more of those.
SissyPants walks forward and throws out a flicking leg kick. Cross Furia checks it nicely though, as he moves to the side.
SissyPants connects with a body shot that sends Cross Furia's belly button to the back.
Cross Furia connects with a solid leg kick.
SissyPants takes a body punch that cleary hurt but he's trying not to show any weakness.
Cross Furia throws the kick towards the body but SissyPants avoids it.
Cross Furia attempts a low kick but it misses it's target.
SissyPants unleashes a big counter combination but Cross Furia bobs and weaves and avoids any damage.

Cross Furia clinches up against the cage.
Cross Furia doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
SissyPants struggles to land a body shot inside as Cross Furia controls his hands.
Cross Furia scores with a nice hook to the head.
Cross Furia is using his height advantage well here, landing a good percentage of his punches.
Cross Furia throws a hook to the body. More of an arm punch but it's all scoring with the judges.
SissyPants lands a body punch in the clinch.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
SissyPants scores with a nice hook to the head.
Both fighters are absolutely exhausted here.
SissyPants blocks an uppercut.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Cross Furia misses with a hook to the ribs.
Cross Furia softening up his opponent with strikes, against the cage.
Cross Furia scores with an uppercut up the middle.
SissyPants misses with the head strike.
Cross Furia misses with a punch to the body.
Cross Furia misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Cross Furia misses with a punch on the inside.
A shot in the inside from Cross Furia.
SissyPants missing with knees to the body.
Cross Furia lands with a left to the head.
A body shot lands from SissyPants.
Dante Cross Furia has scored more points in the clinch so far.
SissyPants swings wildly with an uppercut but Cross Furia uses good head movement to avoid it.
SissyPants tries to land knees in the clinch but Cross Furia avoids the damage to the body.
SissyPants doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
SissyPants misses with a body punch.
Cross Furia prevents a body shot from SissyPants.
A head punch blocked on the inside by SissyPants.
SissyPants working aggressively here.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Cross Furia swings wildly with an uppercut but SissyPants uses good head movement to avoid it.
SissyPants presses Cross Furia against the cage and delivers a mid-strength body shot.
SissyPants misses with a hook to the ribs.
SissyPants digs a right hand underneath Cross Furia's ribcage. Cross Furia let out a lung full of air as it connected.
SissyPants scores with an uppercut up the middle.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
A shot in the inside from SissyPants.
SissyPants tries to work over Cross Furia's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
SissyPants misses with a punch to the body.
SissyPants can't find room to land a body shot as Cross Furia controls the action.
SissyPants is leaning against Cross Furia and scores with a nice uppercut to the body.
SissyPants lands with a quick shot inside that doesn't really do much damage.
SissyPants lands a glancing elbow in the clinch.
SissyPants throws a blind hook that connects with the side of Cross Furias head.
SissyPants scores with an uppercut up the middle.

Cross Furia is rocked!
SissyPants lands an uppercut in the clinch that drops Cross Furia to his knees! SissyPants keeps firing more shots against his stricken opponent and the referee jumps in to save him!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 2:57 of round 2, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). FannyPack SissyPants!
A very excited looking FannyPack SissyPants rambled incoherently for about 5 minutes post fight about how awesome he is. It was kinda funny for a while but then everyone got annoyed.