PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a featherweight MMA rules bout between Boris Orlov (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Dardan Douchebag (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Orlov comes to the cage accompanied by K.A.B.O.S.H. - God Of War. Douchebag has chosen Donkey as his entrance music, which hasn't gone down very well with the crowd. These two fighters really are very evenly matched on the feet - it will be fascinating to see who can assert themselves in that aspect of the fight.

Orlov
vs
Douchebag

175 cm
23
147 lbs
6 - 0 - 0

176 cm
25
155 lbs
6 - 4 - 0

Great wrestler
World class boxer
Granite chin

Excellent grappler
World class boxer
Good gas tank

Aspire Nutrition

My$tic Clothing ~ (`10%Laundry`)

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the featherweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 6 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Boris Orlov!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 6 - 4 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Dardan Douchebag!
The judges for this bout are Don Winkell, Timothy Bukovac and Frank Antenori.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Orlov misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Douchebag.
Orlov takes an uppercut right on the jaw but it doesn't phase him.
Douchebag doesn't succeed with the takedown
and Orlov counters with a body kick.
Douchebag takes a jab right on the kisser.
Douchebag displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Orlov throws out the jab.
Douchebag chopped to the floor by a nice leg kick but he springs right back up before Orlov can pounce on him.
Orlov connects nicely with a jab. Noted by the judges no doubt.
Douchebag tries for a takedown but Orlov sees it coming a mile off and avoids it easily.
Orlov throws out a loose jab but Douchebag uses good head movement to avoid it.

Douchebag has taken the fight to the clinch.
Orlov lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage.

Orlov breaks from the clinch.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Douchebag fails with a rather predictable takedown attempt.
Boris Orlov has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Dardan Douchebag.
Douchebag tries to close the distance and clinch but Orlov swats him to one side with an open hand palm strike and circles away.
Orlov misses with a double jab.
Nice sprawl there from Orlov as Douchebag shoots in.
We've been informed that Douchebag has been sparring a lot of Muay Thai in the buildup to this fight so let's see if that has an impact on the result.
Douchebag shoots in for a takedown but Orlov shows good takedown defense.
Orlov throws a big counter combination but Douchebag scrambles out of danger and avoids any damage.
Orlov rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Douchebag moves out of range and avoids them all easily.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Douchebag shoots for a takedown but Orlov saw that one coming a mile off and avoided it easily.
As Douchebag backs away, Orlov returns fire with a leg kick that just misses.
Douchebag shoots in for a takedown but Orlov shows good takedown defense there and keeps this one on the feet.
Orlov lands with a shot to the body.
Douchebag tries to clinch but Orlov is having none of it.
A big left from Orlov misses.
Douchebag misses with an uppercut. Orlov saw that one coming.
Douchebag tries to bum rush Orlov with a series of wild strikes but Orlov uses good footwork to avoid the assault.
Orlov feinted there with a counter leg kick.
Douchebag misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Orlov is looking for a counter combo.
Douchebag lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but Orlov circles away quickly and effectively.
Douchebag blocks a leg kick.
Douchebag bobs and weaves and throws out a fast jab that snaps Orlov's head backwards.
Douchebag moves into range and connects with a jab.
Douchebag shoots in looking for a takedown but Orlov manages to keep the fight standing, pushing Douchebag's face into the canvas for good measure before circling away.
Orlov swung with a counter punch to the body but it didn't connect.
Orlov scores with a punch to the head.
Orlov lands with a thumping leg kick.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Orlov misses with a body shot.
Douchebag throws a right and a left that Orlov avoids nicely.

Orlov gets tackled into the cage by Douchebag. Douchebag maintains the clinch.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Orlov tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Douchebag's elbow.
Orlov swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Orlov tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Douchebag's elbow.
Douchebag blocks a body shot from Orlov.
Orlov lands a nice shot to the body.

Douchebag manages to break the clinch.
Orlov swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
Orlov leaves Douchebag with his face pressed against the mat as he sprawls beautifully, defending against a solid takedown attempt.
Orlov throws a jab but it's blocked by Douchebag.
Douchebag tries to score a power double leg takedown but Orlov sees that one coming and sprawls well. That will dishearten Douchebag somewhat.
Orlov slaps away a takedown attempt from Douchebag, before circling back to the center of the mat.
Douchebag tries to clinch there but Orlov circles away.
Douchebag shoots in for a takedown but Orlov shows good takedown defense.
Orlov looks to throw the jab but Douchebag is out of range.
Douchebag swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Douchebag closes the distance and clinches up with Orlov, looking for a takedown. Douchebag pushes Orlov against the cage but Orlov circles to the side and manages to break the clinch.
Orlov throws a body punch but Douchebag moves out of range.

Orlov gets caught flat footed, as Douchebag shoots in with a quick takedown into guard.
Orlov tries to land a sweep but no joy.
Douchebag trying to land body shots but he keeps hitting the mat.
Orlov bucks up whilst keeping hold of a body lock, managing to reverse the position. Now he's in top in Douchebag's guard.

Orlov is just sitting in guard, looking to avoid any submissions.
Douchebag is trying to control the position from the bottom.
Orlov not doing a lot at the moment. He'll have to show some more aggression or the fight will get stood up.
Douchebag is working an open guard here, looking to improve his position. No doubt that will leave him open to counters but at least he's being more offensive.

Douchebag has his foot on Orlov's thigh. He's trying to push off and get in position for a triangle, I think. Orlov works his way back into a safe position though.

That's four minutes gone in the round.

Douchebag looking for submissions off his back, moving his hips, looking for an opening.

Douchebag looking for a guillotine here but Orlov defends easily.
Orlov postures up.
Douchebag will have to put a bit more behind his punches if he's going to do any damage from this position.
Douchebag tries to strike from the bottom.

Douchebag is looking for a triangle but Orlov pushes his legs off easily.
Douchebag looking to hit a scissor sweep but Orlov is one step ahead there.
Orlov slows down the pace of the fight, as he sits in guard.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Boris Orlov dominated that round.
That's the end of the interval. I'm sure that seemed a lot quicker than a minute for our two fighters! Back to the action.

Douchebag shoots in for a takedown. "I don't think so" says Orlov as he avoids it easily.
Douchebag is looking to clinch.
Douchebag shoots and misses
and Orlov counters with a lovely straight right hand!
A jab from Douchebag does it's job there.
Douchebag throws a looping left and ducks down for a takedown. He's got his arms around Orlov's waist but Orlov gets an underhook and avoids the takedown by throwing Douchebag off to one side.
An attempted straight right counter from Orlov misses the target.
Boris Orlov has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Dardan Douchebag.

Douchebag shoots in and gets a takedown into Orlov's guard.
Orlov looking to sweep here. No luck so far.
Douchebag is looking to work some ground and pound but Orlov has wrist control.
Douchebag working in close now, lands a nice elbow to the side of Orlov's head.
Orlov keeping moving, preventing Douchebag from controlling successfully.
Douchebag throwing strikes from guard but Orlov blocks nicely.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Douchebag looking to sit in guard and control but Orlov gets the butterfly guard and sweeps. He's now in the guard on the top.

Orlov preventing the sweep.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Douchebag being controlled here, momentarily.
Dardan Douchebag has got the better of the ground game so far.
Douchebag is trying to keep Orlov in close.
Douchebag tries to strike from the bottom.

Douchebag is looking for a guillotine. You can't force these things though and Orlov defends well.

Orlov got a little sloppy there for a moment and Douchebag has worked his way into a loose triangle - can he finish it?! No, Orlov has managed to get both his arms back between Douchebag's legs - danger averted.
Douchebag can't do much from the bottom at the moment, as Orlov controls the pace.

Douchebag has a loose triangle. He'll be looking to tighten that up but Orlov can see exactly what he's planning and manages to posture up and free himself.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Neither fighter has done anything of merit for a good minute or two here and the crowd are not happy about it.
Douchebag tries to strike from the bottom.
Douchebag is working an open guard here, looking to improve his position. No doubt that will leave him open to counters but at least he's being more offensive.
Orlov throws a big right hand that misses.
Douchebag tries to land a sweep but no joy.
The referee is pacing around the two fighters - he looks like he's thinking about a standup.

The referee has decided to stand the fighters back up, so we'll restart on the feet.
Orlov connects with a slap. Keep your fist closed son.

Orlov tries to sprawl but Douchebag drives through with a takedown into half guard.
Orlov is looking to improve his position.
The two fighters exchange a few words. I couldn't hear what they were saying but maybe it's more fun if you make it up yourself. Douchebag connects with a nice short shot to Orlov's temple.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Douchebag missing with the ground and pound from half guard.
Douchebag is trying to advance to mount but he's lost his balance and Orlov reverses the position - he's now on top in Douchebag's guard.
Douchebag seems keen to control Orlov's posture.
Orlov is just sitting in guard, looking to avoid any submissions.
Douchebag doesn't do any damage with a couple of strikes from the bottom.
Douchebag tries to strike from the bottom.
Douchebag doesn't do any damage with a couple of strikes from the bottom.
Douchebag trying to keep a closed guard but Orlov is proving a slippery customer.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Douchebag tries to strike from the bottom.
Douchebag has the superior BJJ but he's also working some ground strikes into his gameplan.
Orlov won't allow Douchebag to sweep him here.

Douchebag escapes his hips to the side and looks to be working for an armbar. Orlov gives him a little smile and shakes his head. No chance.

Douchebag is looking for a triangle but Orlov pushes his legs off easily.
Douchebag striking off his back but it's not causing Orlov any problems.
Douchebag trying to punch from his back but it's not doing any damage.
The crowd thankful this round is nearly over.

Douchebag throwing his legs up looking for a triangle.

Douchebag has his foot on Orlov's thigh. He's trying to push off and get in position for a triangle, I think. Orlov works his way back into a safe position though.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

A close second round but Dardan Douchebag will probably get the nod - 10:9.
That's the end of the interval. I'm sure that seemed a lot quicker than a minute for our two fighters! Back to the action. This is the final round!

A telegraphed takedown attempt from Douchebag is defended easily by Orlov.
Douchebag smiles there as he lands a nice right hand right on the button.
No luck for Douchebag with that takedown attempt.
Orlov feints and then cracks Douchebag's leading leg with a nice low kick. He's obviously looking to slow Douchebag down.
Douchebag changes levels and looks for a double leg takedown. Orlov tries to avoid it but Douchebag manages to keep hold of a leg and drag Orlov to the ground. Orlov escapes though and pops straight back up to his feet.
Boris Orlov has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Dardan Douchebag.
Nice uppercut lands for Douchebag. That snapped Orlov's head back.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Orlov misses the shot to the body.
Douchebag misses with a jab, cross combination.
Douchebag shoots in and drives through. Orlov sprawls well.
Orlov jinks towards his opponent looking like he wants to counter with a mid kick but doesn't commit.
Orlov thows a left - swing and a miss!
Orlov stuffs the takedown attempt from Douchebag. Douchebag gets slowly back to his feet.
Douchebag takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Douchebag stumbles momentarily as he takes a strong leg kick from Orlov.

Douchebag gets a double leg takedown into Orlov's guard.
Orlov wants to sweep but no luck.
Douchebag throwing strikes from guard but Orlov blocks nicely.
Douchebag postures up to throw the ground and pound strikes but they don't connect.
Douchebag with a couple of shots to the head there. Not particularly brutal.
Douchebag throwing strikes from guard but Orlov blocks nicely.
Douchebag cracks Orlov with a solid left hand.
Douchebag throws an elbow that misses. Orlov uses the momentum to reverse the position. He's now in Douchebag's guard. Nice move by Orlov!

Douchebag throws a couple of shots from the bottom but they don't land.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Douchebag is trying to control the position from the bottom.
Douchebag throwing strikes off his back to little effect.
Douchebag trying to control the position.
Douchebag might have to switch it up a bit here because his efforts to control Orlov haven't been going to plan, at least at the current moment in time.
Douchebag is working an open guard here, looking to improve his position. No doubt that will leave him open to counters but at least he's being more offensive.

Orlov avoids a guillotine attempt easily.
Orlov slows down the pace of the fight for a moment. He'll need to remain active if he doesn't want to see the fight stood back up.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Douchebag throws a couple of weedy looking strikes off his back.

The ref stands the fighters back up due to a lack of activity.
Orlov misses with a body shot.
Douchebag tries a counter takedown but it's more of a dummy move, and he uses it to push himself away.
A jab from Douchebag misses.
Douchebag misses with a straight left.

Douchebag looking to shoot here. He's gone for it and he's landed a takedown into side control! Oh, that's bad for Orlov!
Douchebag working away.
Douchebag fails to land a wild elbow strike.
Douchebag throwing shots but missing, from side control.
Douchebag throws a strike aimed at the side of Orlov's head but Orlov avoids it well.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Orlov is looking for a sweep.
Douchebag throwing strikes but Orlov manages to buck up and roll into a nice reversal - now he's on top in side control!
Douchebag is looking to regain half guard here but Orlov keeps moving and retains side control.
Douchebag is sneaking out the side here. He's bucked Orlov off and has taken his back!
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!

Douchebag looking for the choke from the back.
Douchebag throwing wild punches that miss their target.
I really don't envy Orlov right now.

Orlov is displaying good submission defense - not really looking in danger of submitting to the rear naked choke at the moment. That could change in an instant of course if Douchebag gets his way!
Well, with Douchebag on his back, surely it's only a matter of time before Orlov is tapping out... Can he escape the position?
Orlov covering up well under a series of strikes from Douchebag.

And that's the end of the fight!
Dardan Douchebag comfortably won the final round on my scorecard.
I think Douchebag has won this one but let's see whether the judges agree with me. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Don Winkell scores the fight 28:29
Judge Timothy Bukovac scores the fight 28:29
Judge Frank Antenori scores the fight 28:29

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Dardan Douchebag!
Dardan Douchebag took to the microphone after his victory and thanked his sponsors, My$tic Clothing ~ (`10%Laundry`) for their support in the buildup to the fight.