PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between Thoreaux AssKicken (ranked 1179 p4p, 182 weight class) and Oswald Cobblepot (ranked 1499 p4p, 213 weight class). AssKicken comes to the cage accompanied by Winds of Change. Both fighters look fresh as a daisy as they make their way towards the cage.

AssKicken
vs
Cobblepot

190 cm
26
215 lbs
11 - 6 - 1

185 cm
27
206 lbs
8 - 3 - 0

Good wrestling
World class boxer
Insanely flexible

Good wrestler
World class MT
Good gas tank

Urban Fighter
Aspire Clothing

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the light heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 11 - 6 - 1, fighting out of Amsterdam, Thoreaux AssKicken!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 8 - 3 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Oswald Cobblepot!
The judges for this bout are James Glass, James Ackerman and William Gold.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
AssKicken misses the jab.
A nice inside leg kick there by AssKicken. That's going to slow Cobblepot down.
Cobblepot throws a lazy uppercut
and AssKicken counters with a nice low kick that buckles Cobblepot's knee momentarily.
Cobblepot has been spending a lot of time sparring his boxing in the run up to the fight, trying to sharpen up those hands and look for a knockout.
Cobblepot throws a body shot but no joy.
AssKicken half commits to a counter takedown before pushing away, out of range.
AssKicken attempts a low kick but it misses it's target.
AssKicken takes a step towards his opponent and connects with a left hand, before circling away.
AssKicken throws a right hand that misses
and Cobblepot counters with a nice low kick that buckles AssKicken's knee momentarily.
AssKicken takes a solid shot to the body. That one hurt him but he's trying not to show it.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
AssKicken shoots for a takedown but Cobblepot saw that one coming a mile off and avoided it easily.
A little jabbing left from Cobblepot on the counter but it doesn't find it's target.
A looping hook to the body misses from Cobblepot. AssKicken does a little dance to reset his feet.
AssKicken misses with a left hand
and Cobblepot counters with a thumping low kick.
Decent striking displayed by Cobblepot there.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Cobblepot drops his hands momentarily and AssKicken takes advantage with a crisp shot to the head.
Cobblepot connects with a solid leg kick.
Oswald Cobblepot is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
AssKicken checks the leg kick.
AssKicken uses good footwork to get in and out, landing a nice hook.
Cobblepot chopped to the floor by a nice leg kick but he springs right back up before AssKicken can pounce on him.
A slow jab from AssKicken misses its intended target.
Cobblepot throws a leg kick but AssKicken sees it coming and checks it nicely.
AssKicken fakes with a right hand and throws a good leg kick, right into the thigh. That had to hurt Cobblepot.
Like a baseball bat into the meat of his leg there - nice leg kick by Cobblepot.
Boom, another hit is landed. "You're gunna get knocked out" taunts AssKicken, as that shot connected.
The fighters circle momentarily. AssKicken darts into range and connects with a nice straight punch.
AssKicken looks to have improved his striking defense since last time we saw him fight.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
AssKicken throws a big shot that misses.
Cobblepot throws out a counter right but AssKicken avoids it with no problem.
AssKicken keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Cobblepot.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
A clash of legs there as Cobblepot blocks the low kick.
AssKicken will need to close the distance a bit before he attacks - that leg kick was thrown from too far away.
Cobblepot tried to score with a low kick but AssKicken checks it.
AssKicken fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
AssKicken shoots for a double leg takedown but Cobblepot sprawls well. He's pushed AssKicken's face into the mat and manages to get back to his feet relatively easily.
Cobblepot throws a low kick but it's checked well by AssKicken.
Cobblepot takes a shot right to the bread basket.
Thoreaux AssKicken seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Boom, another hit is landed. "You're gunna get knocked out" taunts AssKicken, as that shot connected.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
AssKicken misses the jab.
AssKicken swings wildly with a hook that is half blocked by Cobblepot.
Like a baseball bat into the meat of his leg there - nice leg kick by AssKicken.
AssKicken swings wildly with a right hand that was never going to find it's target.
AssKicken moving in and out of range nicely, whilst landing the scoring shot.

Cobblepot is rocked!
AssKicken misses with a low kick.
Cobblepot turns his hip over beautifully as he lands a nice leg kick.
Cobblepot uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from AssKicken.
Cobblepot uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by AssKicken.
The fighters circling - AssKicken throws out the jab but it was never going to land.
AssKicken misses with a hook. Cobblepot ducked under it nicely.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
AssKicken throws a nice inside leg kick.
AssKicken throws out a loose jab but Cobblepot uses good head movement to avoid it.
Cobblepot looks like he wants to counter punch here.
AssKicken throws a leg kick
and Cobblepot counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Cobblepot takes a shot right to the bread basket.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Cobblepot avoids the body shot from AssKicken.
A big right from Cobblepot misses.
AssKicken throws a hook to the side of Cobblepot's head but Cobblepot sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
AssKicken misses with a lunging right hand
and Cobblepot makes him pay by landing a nice hook to the body before moving out of range.
A combination from AssKicken does no damage.
AssKicken backing away here, and Cobblepot unleashes a leg kick that just misses.
AssKicken lands with a cross to side of his opponent's head.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Thoreaux AssKicken dominated that round.
The fighters get back to their feet, the hooter sounds and we're back to the action!

AssKicken feints and as Cobblepot raises his hands in defense, AssKicken changes levels and drives through with a takedown into guard.
AssKicken stands up and looks to throw the legs aside to pass to side control. Cobblepot swivels though and keeps the full guard.
AssKicken slips effortlessly into side control - very nice.
AssKicken tries to move into full mount but can't pass Cobblepot's legs.
AssKicken advances to mount.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
AssKicken is trying to take his opponent's back.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
AssKicken is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Cobblepot can do to turn this around?

That's one minute gone in the round.
AssKicken is working hard here to advance position.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Cobblepot gets back to half guard.
Cobblepot won't allow AssKicken to pass to mount.

AssKicken is looking for a kimura. It's going to be difficult to finish that from half guard though and Cobblepot defends it well.
AssKicken wants to pass the guard but Cobblepot is defending well.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Cobblepot keeps control of the position for the meantime.
AssKicken works his way into side control.
Cobblepot stops AssKicken from passing to mount.
AssKicken is trying to move to mount but Cobblepot reverses beautifully and ends up in AssKicken's guard.
AssKicken working a defensive guard but Cobblepot passes into half guard.

That's three minutes gone in the round.

AssKicken looking for submissions from an awkward position here.
AssKicken is looking to get full guard. It looks like he might be successful but at the last minute Cobblepot jumps into side control!
Thoreaux AssKicken overall seems to be getting the better of the ground position in the fight so far.
AssKicken is trying to get back to half guard.
AssKicken manages to get one leg in to regain half guard.

AssKicken looking for submissions from an awkward position here.

AssKicken is looking to sinch up a guillotine here but Cobblepot pulls his head out easily.
AssKicken wants to improve his position but Cobblepot is controlling well.

AssKicken looking to work for a kimura from the bottom.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
AssKicken is looking for a sweep. Cobblepot is wise to his cunning plan and keeps the top position.
AssKicken tries to strike from the bottom but it doesn't land.
AssKicken is looking to regain full guard. Not this time though.
AssKicken punching from the bottom.
AssKicken wants to get back to full guard.
Boooooooooooooooooooo!!! God, this has been a terrible round. Come on you two, sort yourselves out!
AssKicken regains full guard. Nicely done.
Cobblepot is intent on slowing down the pace of the fight, simply looking to control.
Cobblepot pressing down on his opponent's thigh, looking to pass guard. AssKicken is keeping the position for now.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Thoreaux AssKicken dominated that second round.
The referee calls time. The cornermen exit stage left and we're back to business. This is the final round!

Cobblepot swings and misses with a hook to the body.
AssKicken misses with a straight right.
Cobblepot blocks a jab.
Cobblepot walks straight into an uppercut. Luckily it didn't land flush.
AssKicken bobs and weaves and unloads with a good uppercut.
Thoreaux AssKicken is winning the standup battle so far.
Cobblepot misses the shot to the body.
AssKicken blocks a leg kick.
A quick step to the side and AssKicken tries to counter with a shot to the body but it doesn't connect.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
AssKicken lands with a hook. Cobblepot tried to avoid it but it clipped the top of his head.
Cobblepot takes a jab on the nose there. A little bit of blood seems to be coming out. Hopefully that won't affect his breathing.
Cobblepot is still on wobbly legs! Can AssKicken finish him?
Cobblepot moves out of range of the strikes.
Cobblepot gets off balance looking for a body kick
letting AssKicken counter with a right hand.

That's one minute gone in the round.
AssKicken lands with a right hand.
An inside leg kick from AssKicken misses.
Cobblepot doesn't fully commit to the body shot counter.
Decent striking displayed by AssKicken there.
Today's fight clock is brought to you by... OOOH that's a huge shot by AssKicken! Cobblepot is in big trouble here - the ref steps in to save him and this one is all over!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:27 of round 3, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Thoreaux AssKicken!
Thoreaux AssKicken very nearly forgot to thank Aspire Clothing amongst all the excitement of his win but just as the interview came to a close, he screamed their name. Hopefully he'll get a few nice freebies in the mail as a thank you.