PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a bantamweight MMA rules bout between Jiri Sayonara (ranked 465 p4p, 25 weight class) and Editiny Dick (ranked 736 p4p, 42 weight class). Sayonara's ring entrance music is that housewives' favourite, Edge Of The Blade. Jiri Sayonara has a significant reach advantage - let's see if he can make it count.

Sayonara
vs
Dick

178 cm
30
138 lbs
18 - 10 - 1

167 cm
32
132 lbs
13 - 7 - 2

Great wrestler
World class boxer
Insanely flexible

BJJ Red Belt
World class MT
Granite chin

Fanatic Inc.
Aspire Clothing

Humanoid Nutrition (160Q for 180$)

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the bantamweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 18 - 10 - 1, fighting out of Las Vegas, Jiri Sayonara!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 13 - 7 - 2, fighting out of Las Vegas, Editiny Dick!
The judges for this bout are Frank Antenori, Don Winkell and Jack Bonds.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Nice body punch from Dick.
Sayonara misses with a low kick.
Dick avoids the body shot from Sayonara.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from Dick! But no joy.
Sayonara steps to the side to avoid the strikes from Dick.
A little feinted left hand from Sayonara on the counter but he doesn't commit to it.
Sayonara misses with a hook.
A cross from Dick lands.
Dick scores with a hook.
Sayonara looks to land a left hand but Dick moved out of range nicely.
Dick misses the jab.
Sayonara fires out a quick counter leg kick but Dick just manages to avoid it.
Sayonara throws an overhand right that lands on Dick's shoulder, as Dick tries to avoid the shot.
Dick throws a monster uppercut resembling something out of street fighter but it doesn't land.
Sayonara uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Dick.
Sayonara has been talking about how he's improved his wrestling in the run up to the fight so let's see if that's enough to sway the balance.
Sayonara's corner calls for a 1-2. Sayonara obliges with the 1 part as he scores the single shot and moves back out of range.
Sayonara throws a body punch but Dick moves out of range.
Dick throws the left hand but Sayonara avoids the punch easily.
Dick looks to land a left hand but Sayonara moved out of range nicely.
Sayonara walks into a jab.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Dick throws a lazy right hand but Sayonara sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
It looked like Sayonara was trying to counter with a body shot coming off that last attack from Dick.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Dick works Sayonara's body with a nice hook.
Dick throws a couple of head shots and lands with the final one - a decent hook, which struck Sayonara on the side of the head.
Dick scores with a big left there. The judges will like that one.
Sayonara takes a step towards his opponent and connects with a left hand, before circling away.
Dick bobs and weaves and unloads with a good uppercut.
Dick uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Sayonara.
Dick looks to clinch
and Sayonara counters with a lovely shot to the body.
Dick tries to drive through with a takedown attempt but Sayonara defends well and Dick ends up having to push Sayonara into the cage where they will battle it out in the clinch.
Sayonara scores with a sloppy punch to the body. Not much technique there but it did the business.
Dick throws a hard body shot but it just misses.
Dick checks a low kick. Bone on bone - not my idea of a good time.
A shot to the liver by Dick. Beautiful body shot.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Sayonara works the jab nicely.
Sayonara misses with a straight left.
Dick throws a body punch but Sayonara moves out of range.
Dick throws a left and a right that both miss
and Sayonara counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Dick moves away from the strike by Sayonara.
A decent looking cross lands there for Sayonara.
Dick waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Sayonara.
Sayonara works his jab well there, keeping his opponent at a distance.
Sayonara fakes a jab and throws a low kick but Dick checks it well.
Sayonara wings a very wild body shot but it does the job and lands to the midsection.
Sayonara jabs at Dick's body.
Sayonara just misses with a punch to the body.
Sayonara takes a shot right to the bread basket.
Dick throws a right hand that misses
and Sayonara counters with a nice uppercut.
Sayonara lands a body shot.
Sayonara takes a body punch but keeps moving.
A big right from Sayonara misses.
Dick changes levels and scores with a jab to the body.
Dick throws a hook but Sayonara blocks it.
Sayonara slips a jab from Dick.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Sayonara gets off balance looking for a body kick
and Dick counters with a nice uppercut.
Decent striking displayed by Sayonara there.
Sayonara throws a push kick but Dick slaps the foot to one side.
Sayonara is really peppering his opponent's head with punches.
Dick fails with a takedown attempt from distance.
Dick misses with a hook. Sayonara ducked under it nicely.
Sayonara thuds a left hand into Dick's body.
Dick lands an overhand right.
Sayonara cracks Dick with an open hand slap.
A big left from Sayonara misses.
Sayonara is using his height advantage well here, landing a good percentage of his punches.
Sayonara throws a low kick but Dick moves out of range easily.
Dick walks straight into an uppercut. Luckily it didn't land flush.
Sayonara throws a chopping leg kick but Dick manages to avoid taking any serious damage.
Sayonara connects with a body shot.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Dick throws a lazy uppercut
and Sayonara cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
Dick misses with a body shot.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Sayonara throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Dick lands a jab to the nose.
Sayonara really does look like a pencil wearing a pair of gloves. Let's hope he has a gameplan to suit that ridiculous body shape.
Sayonara throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Dick throws a series of punches but Sayonara avoids them all with ease.
Sayonara scores with a spinning back kick!
Dick staying out of range there.
Sayonara throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Sayonara paws at his opponent with the jab and then lunges in with a straight, right on the button.
Sayonara ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Dick moves away.
Nice defenses there by Sayonara.
Sayonara thows a left - swing and a miss!
Sayonara keeps his opponent at a distance with a nice jab.
The crowd applaud the fighters' efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Sayonara feints and then cracks Dick's leading leg with a nice low kick. He's obviously looking to slow Dick down.
Jiri Sayonara is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Sayonara misses with a straight left.
Dick jabbing away but nothing is landing.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Jiri Sayonara dominated that round.
That's the end of the round. The referee orders the cornermen out of the cage so we can get back down to business.

Sayonara uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Dick.
Sayonara throws a shot from downtown. Dick moves away and avoids it.
Sayonara scores with a jab to the body.
Sayonara lands a glancing blow to the side of Dick's head.
Sayonara scores with a nice strike.
Sayonara takes a jab on the nose there. A little bit of blood seems to be coming out. Hopefully that won't affect his breathing.
Sayonara walks into a stiff left hand from Dick.
Sayonara throws a big shot that misses.
The fighters circling - Dick throws out the jab but it was never going to land.
Dick takes a nasty kick to the mid section... That should keep him thinking. Does he try and block and risk a head kick landing?
Dick on the wrong end of a kick to the body.
Jiri Sayonara is winning the standup battle so far.
Sayonara takes an uppercut right on the button but keeps his composure.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Sayonara pushing out the jab but it's not landing.
Dick throws a series of punches but Sayonara moves out of range.
Both these guys seem content to just stand up and trade with eachother but Dick might want to think about changing up his gameplan a bit because over the course of the fight, Sayonara has got the better of the exchanges.
Dick on the wrong end of an overhand right that came out of nowhere.
Dick takes a shot to the eye socket. That's gotta hurt.
Sayonara is using his reach advantage well here, landing the more effective single shots from range.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Sayonara throws a front kick that sends Dick stumbling back into the cage.
Dick slips a straight right by Sayonara.
Dick misses with a wild body shot.
Sayonara shapes like he's going to throw a leg kick but settles back down.
Dick on the wrong end of a vicious looking body shot.
Sayonara waving his hands out in front of him, looking to distract Dick.
Dick throws a lazy uppercut
and Sayonara counters with a body kick.
Sayonara closes the distance and lands a one-two.
Sayonara misses with a hook
and Dick counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.
Dick uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Sayonara.
Dick keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Sayonara throws a body kick but he was well out of range there.
Sayonara scores with a jab to the jaw.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!

Dick drives through with a really nice takedown into side control.

Dick thinks about going for a far side armbar but bails out and retains the dominant position instead.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Dick working away.

Dick tries for a kimura. Not really close to a finish though.
The fighters are going at a pretty good pace and they're both starting to sweat now.
Sayonara struggling a bit here.
Dick has knee on belly and moves into mount.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Dick with some aggressive grappling here, looking for the finish.
Sayonara tries to hold on but Dick postures up.
Sayonara is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Dick can do to turn this around?

Dick is going oldschool here, as he tries to force Sayonara to tap using a forearm choke. This isn't 1993 though, so Sayonara shrugs it off.
Dick takes Sayonara's back. Could be looking for a rear naked choke here - either way, Sayonara is in trouble.

Dick is persistently looking for the submission but Sayonara is defending it well.
Sayonara tries to escape the position.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Sayonara trying to control the position but Dick manages to sink in the hooks.

Dick looking for the rear naked choke. And he's got it! Sayonara taps!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 4:39 of round 2, we have a winner by way of Submission (RNC). Editiny Dick!
Editiny Dick seemed lost for words in his post fight interview but he remembered to thank his fans and directed everyone to his website.