PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight kickboxing rules bout between Eli Gardenia (ranked 2319 p4p, 66 weight class) and Abraxas J Hardpickle (ranked 20364 p4p, 209 weight class). Gardenia comes to the ring accompanied by Lets get ready to rumble. Hardpickle is bouncing up and down as he enters the arena, backed by Get Schwifty. Eli Gardenia has the better chin. Will he look to stand and bang today?

Gardenia
vs
J Hardpickle

212 cm
29
222 lbs
19 - 8 - 1

190 cm
26
235 lbs
9 - 12 - 0

World class boxer
Insanely flexible

World class boxer
Good gas tank

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 19 - 8 - 1, fighting out of London, Eli Gardenia!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 9 - 12 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Abraxas J Hardpickle!
The judges for this bout are Patrick Alders, Wagner Zegers and Paulsen Ambrosius.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!

Gardenia moves into the clinch.
Gardenia working Hardpickle over with knees to the body.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Gardenia.
Gardenia is trying to force a seperation but Hardpickle has the dominant position.
Good anti-grappling being displayed by Hardpickle as Gardenia tries to tie him up.
Gardenia tries to land knees in the clinch but Hardpickle avoids the damage to the body.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Gardenia.
A head punch on the inside from Gardenia fails to land.
Gardenia tries to stall but Hardpickle uses the opportunity to gain a better position.
Gardenia working hard to break the clinch.
Hardpickle pushes Gardenia back against the ropes and lands a hook to the side of the head.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Hardpickle can't find room to land a body shot as Gardenia controls the action.
Nice body punch from Hardpickle - that landed with a thud.
Gardenia misses with a punch on the inside.
Gardenia is trying to break the clinch but Hardpickle has him pressed against the ropes.
Good body shot from Hardpickle.
Gardenia really does look like a pencil wearing a pair of gloves. Let's hope he has a gameplan to suit that ridiculous body shape.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Hardpickle throws a punch but it's blocked by Gardenia.
Hardpickle cracks Gardenia with a nice body shot.
Gardenia blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Gardenia working aggressively here.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Hardpickle.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Gardenia.
Gardenia is working hard here but doesn't seem to be able to control effectively, up against the ropes.
We've been informed that Hardpickle has been sparring a lot of Muay Thai in the buildup to this fight so let's see if that has an impact on the result.
Hardpickle can't find room to land a body shot as Gardenia controls the action.
Gardenia blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Gardenia.
Hardpickle swings wildly with an uppercut but Gardenia uses good head movement to avoid it.
Gardenia leaning his opponent against the ropes.
Gardenia tries a knee to the head but Hardpickle blocks it.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Hardpickle tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Gardenia's elbow.

Gardenia's corner calls for him to break the clinch, which he does.
Gardenia lands a head shot.
Gardenia throws a right hand that Hardpickle ducks under and follows up with a left that Hardpickle also avoids with ease.
Hardpickle throws a head kick but Gardenia moves out of range.
Hardpickle misses with a low kick.
Hardpickle lands a head kick!
Gardenia fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Gardenia wants to clinch.
Gardenia lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but Hardpickle circles away quickly and effectively.
Hardpickle slips under a jab from Gardenia.
Danga de danga de dang - Gardenia scores with a four punch combination!
Gardenia doesn't manage to clinch there - Hardpickle circles away.
Gardenia thows a left - swing and a miss!
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Eli Gardenia dominated that round.
That's time! Gardenia's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight.

Hardpickle pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Gardenia ducks right into an uppercut from Hardpickle.
Hardpickle throws a leg kick but Gardenia checks it.
Hardpickle paws at his opponent with the jab and then lunges in with a straight, right on the button.
Hardpickle plants his feet and lands a nice head kick!
Hardpickle tries a head kick but it misses.
Gardenia was looking to counter that move with a punch but didn't quite pull the trigger.
Gardenia keeps his opponent at a distance with a nice jab.
Gardenia checks a leg kick.
Hardpickle throws a hook but Gardenia avoids it easily.
Gardenia tries to clinch up.
Gardenia fails to land with a series of punches.
Hardpickle goes for a spinning back kick but it misses.
Gardenia throws a nice looking combination but Hardpickle bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Eli Gardenia is looking to throw some combinations by the looks of things.

Gardenia moves into the clinch.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Hardpickle softening up his opponent with strikes, against the ropes.
Hardpickle tries to throw a body punch but Gardenia avoids it by throwing Hardpickle back against the ropes.
Gardenia throws a blind hook that connects with the side of Hardpickles head.
Hardpickle misses with a hook from the clinch.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Gardenia prevents a body shot from Hardpickle.
Gardenia blocks a punch to the side of the head.

Gardenia pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat.
Gardenia misses with a body shot
and Hardpickle counters with a stiff right hand.
The sound of bone on bone echoes around the arena as Gardenia checks a leg kick.
Hardpickle misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Abraxas J Hardpickle seems to be getting the better of the standup.
Hardpickle throws a low kick but Gardenia avoids it.
It looked like Gardenia was looking amped, ready to throw a big counter but didn't commit.
A jab from Gardenia misses.

Gardenia instigates a clinch.
Good anti-grappling being displayed by Hardpickle as Gardenia tries to tie him up.
Abraxas J Hardpickle seems to be working more effectively in the clinch in the fight so far.
Hardpickle tries to work over Gardenia's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Hardpickle struggles to land a body shot inside as Gardenia controls his hands.
Hardpickle tries to throw a body punch but Gardenia avoids it by throwing Hardpickle back against the ropes.
The two fighters are working to gain dominance in the clinch.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Gardenia blocking some punches.
Hardpickle lands a left hand that snaps the head of Gardenia backwards.
Hardpickle misses with a short punch on the inside.
Gardenia is working hard here but doesn't seem to be able to control effectively, up against the ropes.
Gardenia misses with some punches.
Nice body punch from Hardpickle.
Hardpickle misses with a punch on the inside.
Gardenia tries to break the clinch but Hardpickle is controlling the position.
Hardpickle misses with a hook to the ribs.
Hardpickle prevents Gardenia from breaking the clinch.

Gardenia breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat.
Gardenia throws a low kick, looking for Hardpickle's leg but Hardpickle calmly moves out of range.
Gardenia scores with a push kick.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Hardpickle moves out of range of the strikes.
Gardenia dips down and scores with a jab to the body.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

A close second round but Abraxas J Hardpickle will probably get the nod - 10:9.
OK. That's time! The bell goes and we're back to the action. Let's get this one finished - here comes the final round!

Gardenia looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Gardenia avoids the head kick by Hardpickle.
An attempted straight right counter from Gardenia misses the target.
Gardenia tries to score with an inside leg kick but telegraphs it and Hardpickle is able to avoid easily.
Hardpickle flicks out a counter leg kick but Gardenia steps away.
The fighters are starting to get sweaty, which will make takedowns a bit more tricky.
A head kick misses from Hardpickle.
Hardpickle tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Gardenia seem to be loading up, looking for a big counter.
A leg kick checked by Gardenia.
Gardenia throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
A cross from Hardpickle lands.
Hardpickle misses with a head kick.
Hardpickle misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Hardpickle shapes like he's going to throw a leg kick but settles back down.
Hardpickle throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Hardpickle misses with a hook
and Gardenia counters with a stiff right hand.
Gardenia throws a head kick that misses.
Hardpickle pivots, looking for a leg kick but Gardenia is out of range and Hardpickle settles back down.
Gardenia is looking to counter punch.
Gardenia throws a jab but it's blocked by Hardpickle.
Hardpickle tries to score with a low kick but Gardenia moves his leg out of the way.
Hardpickle pulls out of a head kick attempt.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Hardpickle scores with a sloppy punch to the body. Not much technique there but it did the business.

Gardenia rushes Hardpickle and presses him up against the ropes.
Hardpickle blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Hardpickle makes some space for himself and lands an uppercut.
Hardpickle is working Gardenia over against the ropes.
A right hook to the body lands for Gardenia.
Hardpickle swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Gardenia blocks a body shot from Hardpickle.
Hardpickle has a couple of punches blocked by Gardenia.
Hardpickle lands with a short punch from the clinch.
Hardpickle tries to throw a body punch but Gardenia avoids it by throwing Hardpickle back against the ropes.
Gardenia is trying to push Hardpickle away but Hardpickle has him pressed against the ropes, so he's going nowhere.
Hardpickle misses with a punch on the inside.
Gardenia can't break the clinch.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Gardenia blocks an uppercut.
Hardpickle can't find room to land a body shot as Gardenia controls the action.

Gardenia breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
Hardpickle on the wrong end of a decent looking cross there.
Hardpickle dodges the punch combination from Gardenia.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
The fighters circling - Gardenia throws out the jab but it was never going to land.
Gardenia tries to clinch but Hardpickle moves out of range.
Gardenia moves out of range as Hardpickle throws a body kick.
A little feinted left hand from Gardenia on the counter but he doesn't commit to it.
Hardpickle throws a head kick that misses.
Abraxas J Hardpickle seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Nice body kick there by Hardpickle.
Gardenia checks a leg kick nicely.
Gardenia fakes low and throws an overhand right that catches Hardpickle on the side of the head.
Gardenia throws a lazy right hand but Hardpickle sees it coming a mile off and sidesteps it easily.
Hardpickle throws a head kick that misses.
Gardenia throws a leg kick but Hardpickle sees it coming and moves out of range.
Hardpickle takes a jab on the nose. He smiles like he loves it and keeps coming.

And that's the end of the fight!
I would just about give that final round to Abraxas J Hardpickle.
I think Hardpickle has won this one but let's see whether the judges agree with me. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.

Judge Patrick Alders scores the fight for Abraxas J Hardpickle!
Judge Wagner Zegers scores the fight for Eli Gardenia!
Judge Paulsen Ambrosius scores the fight for Abraxas J Hardpickle!

Abraxas J Hardpickle wins by split decision!
A very excited looking Abraxas J Hardpickle rambled incoherently for about 5 minutes post fight about how awesome he is. It was kinda funny for a while but then everyone got annoyed.