PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between Robert Burner (ranked 8806 p4p, 137 weight class) and Barry Bludgeon (ranked 7912 p4p, 132 weight class). I'm sure you'll be fascinated to know that I was talking to some pointless Z list celebrity before the fight and he thought that Barry Bludgeon was going to win. Let's see if he was right.

Burner
vs
Bludgeon

180 cm
18
220 lbs
1 - 2 - 0

205 cm
18
260 lbs
1 - 2 - 0

Good wrestling
Basic striking
Good chin

BJJ White Belt
Decent boxing
Powerful

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 2 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 1 - 2 - 0, fighting out of New York, Robert Burner!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 1 - 2 - 0, fighting out of New York, Barry Bludgeon!
The judges for this bout are Steve Montenegro, David Schapiro and Bruno Lombardi.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Bludgeon with a nice cross.
Bludgeon just misses with a punch to the body.
A left and a right from Bludgeon both land. Nice combination.

It looks like Robert Burner has been cut.
Burner throws a big shot that misses.
Burner closes this distance looking for a takedown but Bludgeon circles away.
Bludgeon fakes a jab and then connects with a hook.
Nice defenses there by Bludgeon.
Burner misses with an uppercut.
Bludgeon is looking for the big counter here.
Bludgeon slips a jab from Burner.
Bludgeon closes the distance and lands a one-two.
Burner fails with a rather predictable takedown attempt.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Bludgeon ducks under a wild hook from Burner.
Burner on the wrong end of an overhand right that came out of nowhere.

Robert Burner's cut is getting worse.
Bludgeon scores with a punch to the gut of his opponent.
Horrible takedown attempt by Burner or perhaps it was just good defense by Bludgeon, which made it look bad.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Robert Burner. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Bludgeon lunges at Burner with a hook that half lands and is half blocked by Burner's hand.
Bludgeon cracks a nice hook into Burner's ribs.
Burner misses with a low kick.
A punch combination from Bludgeon misses.
Burner attempts a counter takedown but Bludgeon avoids it well and moves away.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Bludgeon shuffles to his left behind two crisp jabs. Burner eats them both and turns towards Bludgeon to reposition himself and eats a stinging right hand-left hook combo.
Bludgeon falls off balance throwing a combination

and Burner counters with a nice double leg into half guard.
Burner stalling.
Burner wants to pass to mount but Bludgeon is defending the position.
Burner looks to score some points with some ground and pound.
Burner wants to take a breather but Bludgeon is having none of it.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Bludgeon trying to control from the bottom.
Burner not landing any meaningful shots this time.
Burner thows a wild elbow that connects with the canvas.
Burner is stalling here. Bludgeon is in no mood to hang around though. He's locked up a kimura from the bottom! Burner seems to be keeping calm but he's forced to roll out of the hold and Bludgeon has ended up in side control on the top. Nice work.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Bludgeon wants to stand but Burner is controlling his arm.
Burner is looking to reverse the position.
Burner manages to land a sweep and he's now on top! Lovely Jiu Jitsu!
Bludgeon keeps control of the position for the meantime.
Bludgeon blocking the ground and pound attempt from Burner.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Burner content to sit in half guard and control for a moment.
Burner throwing shots but they're hitting the canvas more than the man.
Bludgeon trying to control but Burner postures up.
Burner sitting in half guard, looking to land shots. Bludgeon defending well though.
Burner prevents Bludgeon from improving his position.
Burner seems content to maintain position for now, rather than mounting any offense.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are starting to boo a lack of action.
Burner working some ground and pound from close in. He's looking to maintain this position and strike for a while by the looks of things... although he'll probably advance to full mount in a minute now I've said that.
Neither fighter is being very active at the moment, with Burner in particular looking to stall.
Bludgeon really doesn't want to stay on the ground with Burner. If he can't get it back to his feet, it's only a matter of time before he'll be tapping out.
Burner wants to take a breather but Bludgeon is having none of it.
Still in half guard, Burner seems content to control.
Burner thumps the canvas. Not on purpose obviously - he just missed Bludgeon's head.
Burner looks to score some points with some ground and pound.
Burner working the head and body with strikes.
Burner seems to be taking a bit of a break to think of his next move. He lands a short punch in the meantime.
Burner is trying to control the action in half guard but Bludgeon is working away on the bottom, looking perhaps to get back to full guard.

That's five minutes gone in the round.
Bludgeon trying to hold on to Burner's head to control him but Burner postures up.
Burner tries to pass the half guard into mount. Bludgeon knows what he's doing though and prevents the attempt.
Burner not landing any meaningful shots this time.
Burner has been looking to land a fair amount of strikes on the ground. He might be looking to soften his opponent up in order to work for a submission.
Burner sitting in half guard, looking to land shots. Bludgeon defending well though.
Burner looks to score some points with some ground and pound.
Burner is scoring with some nice ground and pound from the dominant position.
Bludgeon is trying to defend against the ground and pound but Burner scores with a couple of nice shots.
Burner is controlling the pace.

That's six minutes gone in the round.
Bludgeon blocking the ground and pound attempt from Burner.
Burner wants to take a breather but Bludgeon is having none of it.
Burner slips a nice elbow through Bludgeon's hands, connecting with Bludgeon's forehead.
Burner not throwing his punches with enough precision this time.
Bludgeon avoiding damage under a succession of punches from Burner.
The referee calls for the fighters to work.
Bludgeon keeping his head moving to avoid the ground and pound.
Burner seems content to maintain position for now, rather than mounting any offense.
Burner missing with some ground and pound from the half guard.

That's seven minutes gone in the round.
Burner drops an elbow to the side of Bludgeon's head.
Burner controlling the action here.
Burner not landing any meaningful shots this time.
Burner drops an elbow to the side of Bludgeon's head.
Bludgeon tries to kick Burner off but Burner keeps his base steady and stays in half guard.
Burner is keen to just control but Bludgeon is a slippery customer.
Burner throwing shots but Bludgeon is blocking nicely.
Bludgeon has no desire to be mounted, so is trying to control. Burner is working away from the top position though.

The referee has stepped in and called for a break in the action. We'll restart on the feet.

That's eight minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are starting to boo a lack of action.
Burner is pinned up against the cage taking some big shots here. The referee is looking closely deciding whether he should stop the fight.
Bludgeon connects with a hook to the side of his opponent's head.
Bludgeon scores with a jab. Burner acknowledges it with a nod of the head.
Burner jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Burner swings away with a leg kick that misses.
Bludgeon jabs Burner to the body, keeping him at a distance.
Bludgeon lands a jab followed by a nice looking cross.
Burner ducks under a wild hook from Bludgeon.
A jab from Burner misses.
Burner is really struggling to find his range with his punches. Bludgeon's reach advantage is clearly causing him problems.
Bludgeon pushing out the jab but it's not landing.
Burner looked to counter that last move with a leg kick but didn't pull the trigger.
Bludgeon misses with a double jab.

Bludgeon gets taken down but at least he's managed to land in guard.
Bludgeon utilising some decent striking defenses from the guard, preventing the ground and pound.
Burner trying to land body shots but he keeps hitting the mat.

That's nine minutes gone in the round.
Burner lands a couple of decent looking shots.
Burner passes easily into side control. Nice work.
Burner working the ground and pound.
Burner working the ground and pound from side control.
Burner throwing shots but missing, from side control.
Burner cracks Bludgeon with a big right hand but Bludgeon just smiles back at him and invites him to have another go.
Bludgeon prevents Burner from improving position.
Burner tries to land with some ground and pound but misses.
Bludgeon struggling a bit here.
Burner takes a little break here. Bludgeon wants to take advantage but he is being controlled well.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

A close round but Barry Bludgeon will probably get the nod.
Both fighters have cut men working on them during the interval.
That's the end of the round. The referee orders the cornermen out of the cage so we can get back down to business. So, we enter the final round. Let's see if either fighter can bring us a finish, or whether we're going to the judges scorecards.

Bludgeon scores to the head and body with a nice combination!
Burner takes a body punch but keeps moving.
Bludgeon jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Bludgeon slaps away a takedown attempt from Burner, before circling back to the center of the mat.
A right-left combo lands from Bludgeon.

Robert Burner's cut is bleeding quite badly. He's got to try and protect it.
Bludgeon ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Burner moves away.
Bludgeon has used his reach advantage pretty well so far tonight.
Bludgeon's corner calls for a 1, 2 combination and Bludgeon duly obliges.
Bludgeon is using his reach advantage to land shots from outside his opponent's range.
Bludgeon works his jab well there, keeping his opponent at a distance.

Jeez, Robert Burner's cut is really nasty now. The referee must be thinking about getting that checked.
Barry Bludgeon seems to be getting the better of the standup.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Burner shoots in for a takedown. "Ole!" shouts Bludgeon as he jumps to the side.
Bludgeon looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
A punch combination from Bludgeon misses.
Bludgeon sizes up Burner with a pawing jab and scores with a straight right down the middle.
Bludgeon ducks under a wild hook from Burner.

That's one minute gone in the round.

Burner fakes a strike and closes the distance, dragging Bludgeon to the ground. Burner is now in Bludgeon's guard.
Bludgeon wants to get back to his feet but Burner is in a dominant position and won't allow it.
Burner postures up to throw the ground and pound strikes but they don't connect.
Bludgeon wants to stand but Burner is controlling the position.
Burner looking to control the position here, rather than advance.
Burner loading up with the ground and pound but he's missing more than he's landing in this flurry.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Burner is stalling in the full guard.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Burner scores with a decent looking elbow strike.
Burner trying to land body shots but he keeps hitting the mat.
Burner might be looking to lock onto one of his opponent's long limbs for a submission, whilst we're on the ground.
Burner throwing strikes but missing.

The referee has stepped in and called for a break in the action. We'll restart on the feet.
Barry Bludgeon is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Burner jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Bludgeon scores with a decent looking hook.
Bludgeon stuns Burner with a nice body shot, before stepping back out of range.
Burner walks straight into a jab right on the nose. That one stung - he's blinking and trying to clear his head.

The referee calls the doctor in to look at Robert Burner's cut. Oh no, the doctor has called an end to the bout!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 2:51 of round 2, we have a winner by way of TKO (Cut). Barry Bludgeon!
Our winner, Barry Bludgeon, made sure he spent some time buttering up the crowd during his post fight interview, which will no doubt bring him a few more fans.