PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a featherweight MMA rules bout between Dardan Douchebag (ranked 3355 p4p, 273 weight class) and Name Less (ranked 1474 p4p, 156 weight class). Douchebag's ring entrance music is that housewives' favourite, Donkey. Both fighters will be looking to make this an exciting fight for the fans, I'm sure!

Douchebag
vs
Less

176 cm
30
155 lbs
10 - 9 - 0

178 cm
34
159 lbs
7 - 5 - 0

Great wrestler
World class boxer
Cardio machine

Good wrestler
World class MT
Granite chin

CAGED CROW Clothings 50$

Conviction

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the featherweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 10 - 9 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Dardan Douchebag!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 7 - 5 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Name Less!
The judges for this bout are Chris Downing, Frank Dennis and Wesley Smith.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Less throws a body kick that digs right into the meat.
Less has been working on his striking defense in training and it's paying off as Douchebag is landing a low percentage of strikes.
Less lands a leg kick and bounces back out of range.

Douchebag rushes Less and presses him up against the cage.
Douchebag tries to stall but Less uses the opportunity to gain a better position.
A shot in the inside from Less.
Less lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of Douchebag backwards.
Less lands a nice knee to the body.
Less scores with a knee to the head.
Less lands a right hand.
Less lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of Douchebag backwards.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Less misses the knee to the body. Nice hip positioning from Douchebag.
Less fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Douchebag.
With the fighters up against the cage, Less throws an elbow but misses.
A head punch on the inside from Douchebag fails to land.
Less prevents a takedown attempt there.
Less working on landing some head shots here - that one got through nicely.
Less throws a blind hook that connects with the side of Douchebags head.
Less makes some space for himself and lands an uppercut.
Less misses with a punch on the inside.
Less lands a shoulder strike that jolts his opponent's head backwards.
I was talking to Douchebag's coach per-fight and he was telling me that they'd been working on the clinch in the runup to this fight.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Douchebag blocks the elbow strike.
Less connects with a knee to the head.
Douchebag avoiding damage.
Douchebag has a body lock and is looking for a takedown. Less is bouncing around trying to prevent the takedown and somehow he has indeed managed to stay on his feet.
Douchebag managing to block the knees to the body from Less.
Douchebag drops to a knee looking for a takedown but Less gets the underhooks and prevents it.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Dardan Douchebag. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Less tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
Douchebag is trying to maintain a safe position but Less gets an underhook and turns Douchebag into the cage.
Less lands a shoulder strike.

Douchebag escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
A telegraphed takedown attempt from Douchebag is defended easily by Less.

Douchebag scores a trip takedown into side control. Nice.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Less tries to buck Douchebag off but Douchebag is having none of it.
Douchebag misses with an attempted head punch from side control.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Less managing to avoid any damage from the strikes thrown by Douchebag.
Less is looking for a sweep.
Douchebag working the strikes but Less uses the opportunity to regain half guard.
Douchebag takes advantage of the dominant position to land a couple of big hammer fists.
Douchebag wants to control but Less is keeping him busy.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.

Douchebag is trying for a guillotine from the top but the pressure isn't in the right place so Less is just riding it out for now. Douchebag eventually gives up the hold.
Less is trying is best to control the position here.
Douchebag is looking to advance position but Less won't allow it.
Douchebag thows a wild elbow that connects with the canvas.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Douchebag working some ground and pound from close in. He's looking to maintain this position and strike for a while by the looks of things... although he'll probably advance to full mount in a minute now I've said that.
Douchebag scores with a couple of good hammerfists.
Douchebag throwing shots but they're hitting the canvas more than the man.
Douchebag looks to score some points with some ground and pound.
Less trying to control here.
The fighters are starting to get a bit slippery now, which will make submissions a bit more difficult.
Less is trying to avoid being dragged into an even worse position than he's already in but Douchebag is staying active.
Douchebag sitting in half guard, looking to land shots. Less defending well though.
Less is trying to maintain the position but Douchebag is very close to passing his half guard.
Douchebag is keeping good posture, landing some ground and pound.
Douchebag working over Less with some ground and pound. Less looks like he wants out of this position, which is understandable.
Douchebag is nestled in close to Less, controlling him well. He's worked in a nice elbow to the side of the head as well, for good measure.
Nice strikes from Douchebag there.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Less is looking to control Douchebag's leg but it's slowly edging free. Can Less avoid being mounted?
Douchebag throwing punches and elbows but they're not doing any damage.
Douchebag not throwing his punches with enough precision this time.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
Less wants to control but Douchebag is keeping busy.
Less gets back to full guard.
Douchebag postures up to throw the ground and pound strikes but they don't connect.
Less is working from a closed guard but he's struggling to control his opponent.
Less controlling the position.
Less utilising some decent striking defenses from the guard, preventing the ground and pound.
Less is working from a closed guard but he's struggling to control his opponent.
Hammerfist, elbow! yells Douchebag's corner. There ya go! There ya go!
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

A close round but Name Less will probably get the nod.
Well, the break between rounds is over. Let's get back to the scrappin!

Douchebag misses with a takedown attempt - Less sprawls well and throws a nice strike on the way out which just misses.
Less thows a body kick. Douchebag tries to catch it but that hurt him.

Douchebag has taken the fight to the clinch.
An uppercut to the body lands inside from Less.
Douchebag dodges an elbow strike from Less.
Less tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Douchebag's elbow.
Less lands a body punch.
Less misses with a punch on the inside.
Less misses with the head strike.
Less using the Thai plumb to throw knees but Douchebag has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
Less looks to throw an elbow but misses.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Douchebag is looking for a takedown.
Douchebag goes for a takedown attempt but Less pushes him away and we're back to fighting at a distance.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Dardan Douchebag. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Less swings for the body but Douchebag moves out of range.

Douchebag has managed to clinch.
A shot in the inside from Less.
Less gets double underhooks to prevent a takedown attempt from Douchebag.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Douchebag looking for a takedown.
Less swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Less missing with knees to the body.
Less prevents the takedown attempt.
Less gets an overhook and lands an elbow to the side of the head.

Douchebag works for the underhooks and manages to get a trip takedown into guard.
Douchebag has been looking to land a fair amount of strikes on the ground. He might be looking to soften his opponent up in order to work for a submission.
Less is doing well to control the posture of his opponent and prevent any damage.
Douchebag works over Less with some ground and pound from guard.
Less avoiding any damage from the ground and pound.
Less has a closed guard, preventing anything of note from happening. Perhaps he's looking to stall.
Less trying to control the position.
A big thud reverberates around the arena there as Douchebag accidentally thumps the mat. Hopefully he's not broken his hand.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Douchebag throwing shots from guard but he's hitting more mat than opponent.
Douchebag looking to pass the guard.
Douchebag working some ground and pound from guard but it's not doing any damage.
Douchebag is in close to Less's body, working some short punches and elbows.
A big thud reverberates around the arena there as Douchebag accidentally thumps the mat. Hopefully he's not broken his hand.
Less looking to control the pace of the fight rather than finish it.
Less not looking particularly offensive just at the moment.
Less seems keen to control Douchebag's posture.
Dardan Douchebag overall seems to be getting the better of the ground position in the fight so far.
Douchebag working from the guard for now, landing some ground and pound.
Douchebag throwing strikes from guard but Less blocks nicely.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Douchebag is looking to work some ground and pound but Less has wrist control.
Douchebag throwing strikes from guard but Less blocks nicely.
Less is trying to control the position but Douchebag postures up.
Less trying to control the position here.

The referee has stepped in and called for a break in the action. We'll restart on the feet.
Less walks straight into an uppercut. Luckily it didn't land flush.
Crunch! Less slams his shin into Douchebag's torso.
Douchebag closes this distance looking for a takedown but Less circles away.
Less lands with a hook. Douchebag tried to avoid it but it clipped the top of his head.

Douchebag shoots in for a takedown and gets it.
Less wants to control but Douchebag is keeping busy.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Less wants to get back to full guard.
Douchebag thows a wild elbow that connects with the canvas.
Douchebag prevents Less from improving his position.
Nice strikes from Douchebag there.
Douchebag throwing shots but Less is blocking nicely.
Douchebag not landing any meaningful shots this time.
Douchebag throwing shots but Less is blocking nicely.

Douchebag is working for a kimura but Less is defending it quite comfortably.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Less is trying to maintain the position but Douchebag is very close to passing his half guard.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

That was a close second round but I would say that Dardan Douchebag will probably get the nod.
That's the end of the round. The referee orders the cornermen out of the cage so we can get back down to business. The crowd applaud as we get ready to start the final round!

Less tries to sprawl but Douchebag drives through with a takedown into half guard.
Less wants to get back to full guard.
Less keeping control of the leg, stopping his opponent passing to mount.
Douchebag thows a huge punch but Less dodges it nicely.
Less holds on for dear life, maintaining half guard for now.
Douchebag throwing punches and elbows but they're not doing any damage.
Less is positioning himself well to prevent Douchebag advancing to mount.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Douchebag throwing shots but Less is blocking nicely.
Less really doesn't want to stay on the ground with Douchebag. If he can't get it back to his feet, it's only a matter of time before he'll be tapping out.
Less tries to roll over but Douchebag keeps him under control.
Less controlling the position well.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Less is trying to maintain the position but Douchebag is very close to passing his half guard.
Less is refusing to be controlled, as Douchebag sits in half guard.
Less on the receiving end of some nice ground and pound.
Less tries to roll over but Douchebag keeps him under control.
Douchebag missing with the ground and pound from half guard.
Douchebag seems to be taking a bit of a break to think of his next move. He lands a short punch in the meantime.
Douchebag throwing shots but Less is blocking nicely.
Douchebag perhaps working for something from half guard, or maybe not. It looks like he's just sitting there.
Less wants to improve his position but Douchebag is controlling well.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Douchebag lands a big shot. The thud that echoes around the arena is like music to the fans' ears.
Less trying to hold on to Douchebag's head to control him but Douchebag postures up.
Less desperately trying to maintain half guard.
Douchebag is looking to take a break and control but Less is keeping him honest, looking to work from the bottom.
Douchebag throwing shots but they're hitting the canvas more than the man.
Less wants to improve his position but Douchebag is controlling well.
Douchebag wants to lay and pray for a moment but Less keeps working.
Less is looking for a sweep. Douchebag is wise to his cunning plan and keeps the top position.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Douchebag is working hard to pass the guard. He's done it - he's now in full mount! Trouble for Less!
Douchebag putting on the heat here with some good ground and pound!
Less is wriggling around trying to escape.
Douchebag with good strikes from the mount here!
Less really trying hard to get back to half guard here.
Less is in a horrible position here, under a barrage of strikes, he's managing to avoid any damage.

Douchebag goes for an armbar but Less turns quickly into his guard - lovely anticipation from Less.
Less trying to pass the guard but can't manage it just yet.
Douchebag manages to sweep nicely, so he's now on top. Less manages to get himself to full guard.

Less looking to control.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Less utilising some decent striking defenses from the guard, preventing the ground and pound.
Douchebag content to strike from guard, landing some decent shots.
Douchebag throwing shots from guard but he's hitting more mat than opponent.
Less pulls Douchebag in close to prevent any damage.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Douchebag tries to free his leg and advance position but Less is retaining full guard.
Less seems keen to control Douchebag's posture.
Douchebag throwing strikes but missing.
Douchebag postures up to throw the ground and pound strikes but they don't connect.
The crowd thankful this round is nearly over.
Douchebag trying to control the position from guard on top but Less is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.
Less avoiding any damage from the ground and pound.

And that's the end of the fight!
Dardan Douchebag showed his dominance in that final round.
I think Douchebag has won this one but let's see what the judges have to say. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Chris Downing scores the fight 29:28
Judge Frank Dennis scores the fight 29:28
Judge Wesley Smith scores the fight 29:28

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Dardan Douchebag!
Dardan Douchebag very nearly forgot to thank Aspire Clothing amongst all the excitement of his win but just as the interview came to a close, he screamed their name. Hopefully he'll get a few nice freebies in the mail as a thank you.