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PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Bartholomäus Wolff (ranked 94 p4p, 8 weight class) and Crotch Grabber (ranked 180 p4p, 20 weight class). Bartholomäus Wolff is staring across the cage at his opponent, tweaking his nipples... Tweaking his own nipples that is.

202 cm
255 lbs
12 - 0 - 0
207 cm
282 lbs
15 - 1 - 0
Good wrestling
World class boxer
Insanely flexible
Good wrestler
World class MT
Good gas tank


Urban Fighter

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, for the heavyweight championship of the world!
Introducing the champion to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 12 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Bartholomäus Wolff!
And introducing the challenger to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 15 - 1 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Crotch Grabber!
The judges for this bout are Vladimir Khabensky, Sergei Dronov and Aleksei Zolotukhin.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Wolff throws a hook to the body but it doesn't connect.
Grabber jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Grabber connects with the punch.
Wolff throws a sloppy head kick

and Grabber counters with a crisp right hand that drops Wolff! Grabber lets Wolff back up to his feet, looking for a finish!

Wolff is rocked!

It looks like Bartholomäus Wolff has been cut.
Grabber darts in and lands a big hook, right on the button! Wolff's legs crumble underneath him as he falls to the canvas! The ref tackles Grabber before he gets to land any more shots to his stricken foe.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 0:30 of round 1, we have a winner by way of KO (Punch). Crotch Grabber!
Crotch Grabber is the new heavyweight champion!
Jumping up and down and very excited, Crotch Grabber waved his t-shirt featuring Urban Fighter's logo in front of the cameras.
G S C G energy
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