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PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Turd McPherson (ranked 1101 p4p, 143 weight class) and Do You Really Want To Hurt (ranked 1143 p4p, 149 weight class). Over to our ring announcer for the fighter introductions!



225 cm
26
292 lbs
8 - 4 - 0
185 cm
26
285 lbs
10 - 5 - 0
Good wrestling
Basic striking
Cardio machine
BJJ White Belt
Excellent boxer
Good gas tank


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-


Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 8 - 4 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Turd McPherson!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 10 - 5 - 0, fighting out of The Island, Do You Really Want To Hurt!
The judges for this bout are Dirk Anderson, Michael Johnstone and Sandra Marshall.




The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
McPherson throws a body shot but no joy.

McPherson looks for a takedown. He's got it. We're now in half guard.
The referee calls for the fighters to work.
McPherson lands with a punch from half guard.
You Really Want To Hurt felt the need to train up his defensive grappling in the buildup to the fight. Presumably he was expecting to be in a difficult position like this, so let's see if he can get out of it.
McPherson throwing punches and elbows but they're not doing any damage.

McPherson looking for a kimura but he'll have to free his other leg if he wants to finish that. Perhaps he's just using it as a distraction technique.
McPherson scoring with strikes to the body and head.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
You Really Want To Hurt is looking for a sweep. McPherson is wise to his cunning plan and keeps the top position.
You Really Want To Hurt blocking the ground and pound attempt from McPherson.
McPherson sitting in half guard, looking to land shots. You Really Want To Hurt defending well though.

That's one minute gone in the round.
McPherson landing with strikes to the body and head, softening up his opponent.


It looks like Do You Really Want To Hurt has been cut.
McPherson takes advantage of the dominant position to land a couple of big hammer fists.
McPherson is looking to take a break and control but You Really Want To Hurt is keeping him honest, looking to work from the bottom.
McPherson throwing punches and elbows but they're not doing any damage.
McPherson thows a huge punch but You Really Want To Hurt dodges it nicely.
You Really Want To Hurt is controlling McPherson's position as best he can from this difficult position.
McPherson missing with the ground and pound from half guard.
McPherson looks to score some points with some ground and pound.
You Really Want To Hurt trying to control here.
You Really Want To Hurt is trying to defend against the ground and pound but McPherson scores with a couple of nice shots.
McPherson not landing any meaningful shots this time.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
You Really Want To Hurt blocking the ground and pound attempt from McPherson.
You Really Want To Hurt trying to control from the bottom.
McPherson sitting and controlling from the half guard.
McPherson takes advantage of the dominant position to land a couple of big hammer fists.
The referee walks around the fighters to get a better view of the action. McPherson lands a nice short elbow.
McPherson looks over to his corner - he wants some instructions but his corner are not responding.
You Really Want To Hurt really doesn't want to stay on the ground with McPherson. If he can't get it back to his feet, it's only a matter of time before he'll be tapping out.
McPherson landing with strikes to the body and head, softening up his opponent.
McPherson lands a big shot. The thud that echoes around the arena is like music to the fans' ears.


The cut above Do You Really Want To Hurt's eye is starting to cause him problems now.
McPherson scoring with strikes to the body and head.


Do You Really Want To Hurt's cut is absolute horrible now. This looks like something out of a horror film with blood covering both fighters.

The referee calls the doctor in to look at Do You Really Want To Hurt's cut. Oh no, the doctor has called an end to the bout!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3:58 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Cut). Turd McPherson!
Turd McPherson seemed lost for words in his post fight interview but he remembered to thank his fans and directed everyone to his website.
S C
A
G S C
B
G S C G energy
A | B
hype
A | B
pop
A | B
mgr
A | B
FIGHT
RATING
21%
 
 
 
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