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Caged Talk with Jenkins Jennson
Guest: Matty Fernandez, Founder of Caged Warriors MMA
Camera pans around the studio and centers on Jenkins Jennson and Matty Fernandez, with the Caged Warriors MMA logo shimmering in the background. Jenkins and Matty are seated side by side on black cushioned chairs with a small round table between them. On Jenkin’s side is an oversized mug with a straw in it. Matty is holding a regular-sized black mug with a Caged Warriors MMA logo emblazoned on it. Jennson is dressed in his trademark green checkered suit and appears harried and unprepared, as per usual. Matty Fernandez is calm and relaxed. As the camera pans to the men, Matty is joking with the production team. He immediately composes him as the camera approaches. Jenkins looks around and realizes it’s time for him to get started. He looks wide-eyed at the camera for a moment and jerks into motion as if he just woke up from a nap.
Jenkins Jennson: What? Oh Hello! Good day to you. Welcome to Caged Talk, Caged Warriors MMA’s ONLY live interview show. I’m Jenkins Jennson. Let’s get started. We have a very special guest with us today and I’m not just saying that because he’s my boss *Jenkins laughs at his own joke but halts as he sees Matty shows only a hint of amusement*. Mr. Fernandez, welcome, and I just want to say that really like your new haircut, is it new. *Jenkins reaches over to try to touch Matty’s hair*
Matty Fernandez: *Removing Jenkins hand* A touchy one, eh? The interviews only started, ask a few more questions first. To answer your question about my hair. No, it’s not new, and honestly Jenkins, it looks like a bird’s nest right now. When was the last time you had your glasses checked?
JJ: *Takes glasses off and stares hard into them for a second squinting, then puts them back on this face* Oh eh sorry boss..I just…let me get the question I think that fans really want to know. What is Matty short for?
MF: What? *peers at Jenkins confused* My name?? It’s literally what my mates in the underground used to call me in the day. So I kept my name as Matty. My actual name is “you don’t need to know.”
JJ: Wow that’s a long name, no wonder you go by Matty. The underground you say. Sounds juicy, tell us more about that?
MF: *looks over at Jenkins and tilts his head slightly* Well, if you want to go into the deep end then I can talk about it. But don’t bother me if they come hunting you down because you know too much.
JJ: *shudders and looks around nervously* …hunt me..well I…Nevermind then. I don’t go to the deep end. I can’t even swim!
MF: Look at you...almost pissing in your pants already just by interviewing me now...I don't think it will be a good idea at all. You seem more of a kiddie-pool type of guy, and even then, you may need some floaties.
JJ: *Relieved* I couldn’t agree more, sir. I almost drowned in my soup the other day. Now, how did you get into MMA?
MF: MMA is something that I had an interest in for a long-long time. The place where I grew up, there were regular brawls in public. So, I think you can imagine where my love for the sport came from.
JJ: Have you ever competed?
MF: I tried my luck once in a local talent competition...I was in and out of the cage in seconds...the latter in a stretcher obviously...so yeah, I did “compete” once. If you wish to call it that. Oh, and I woke up a couple weeks later in a hospital bed.
JJ: That’s more seconds than me. One time I got into a fight with a bush. I was a few pints in and my glasses were foggy and it was dark out, I thought it was a very large person. I lost that fight.
MF: *laughs* Well some of those bushes can be prickly.
JJ: You loved MMA but competing wasn’t for you, so you turned to managing fighters?
MF: When I realized I wasn’t good enough to compete, it broke my heart. All I ever loved since I was a kid was MMA. Not being able to be involved really hurt me. One day...one of the dudes out the underground...who actually had connections to a couple of good people in the sport. You know, the good people right, the influential ones. He got me talking to a couple of drunk fools around our place who had potential to be a superstar. I saw some potential in them, gave them some training, got them into an organization...and boom! Here we are.
JJ: You achieved success in managing, why place your focus on running an organization?
MF: *Looks at Jenkins with a grin* Are you being sarcastic again? You haven’t seen my record?? If you just want to throw sarcastic questions at me, I’m out of here *gets up and pretends to walk out*
JJ: *Nervous and clearly not getting Mr. Fernandez is joking* No no please sir!
MF: Don’t you know anything about MMA?!
JJ: I must confess, sir, I previously reported on amateur badminton competition. This is my first foray into MMA. It’s scary.
MF: *laughs and shakes his head* What? Badminton? Who hired you anyways??
JJ: Why you did sir?
MF: *Looks around* Uh right, next question.
JJ: Well, back to the previous question. You are managing fighters in MMA, as you had wanted. The world is yours, why start an org? Especially in Helsinki where there are two functioning orgs with over 30 events each?
MF: Now, as far as the org thing is concerned. At first, managing fighters was really good. I actually enjoyed it for once. But after a certain time my hunger for doing something bigger, something more, just kept on growing. Hence I thought, well, when I can manage an entire roster of fighters, why only stick to the knobheads which I control?
With the influence of my underground mates again, those guys were really useful for me to be honest, I got some money. Hehe, actually kind of looted some money and started the organization.
You are wrong about Helsinki. There is only one functioning organization. The other one is closed.
I chose Helsinki ‘cause I have a long-standing relationship with this place. Most of my GF'S are from round here ffs! So, it was an easy choice. Plus, Helsinki really needed an organization for breeding the newcomers.
JJ: *starts to blush and glasses fog up* Your..girlfriends, sir? Isn’t Ms. Fernandez watching this?!
MF: OK, goddammit we can edit that part.
JJ: *Looks like he swallowed an insect* Uh Sir. We are live.
MF: *face goes pale*
JJ: Ehh umm I’m sure you meant female business associates, right? Lots of females doing business in Finland. Right, boss?
MF: *Ignores Jenkins, looks directly into camera* Babe, I meant you. No girlfriends. Definitely no girlfriends. *Shifts nervously*
JJ: Let’s move on then..
MF: *Matty's phone, which he had placed on the round table between them at the start of the interview, starts to vibrate violently. He grabs it an stares at it for moment and then let’s out an expletive* BLEEEEP. *He gets up brings phone to his ear and starts to walk out* I gotta take this. *To phone* Honey Honey…I didn’t..No I said…
JJ: *Looks around unsure of what to do* I suppose..let’s go to commercial.
*Ten minutes later the two men are back and appear to be ready to continue*
JJ: Welcome back everyone. Our deepest *looks into camera* deepest apologies for this ahem technical difficulty. We have received word from our research team that there are, in fact, no girlfriends in Finland. Let’s get back to the interview. What makes Caged Warriors MMA so unique? Why should fans tune in?
MF: Caged Warriors is unique in many ways. Firstly, we have some strict rules, which I have already told everyone pretty openly, most other organizations don't follow. Next, we don't pay over the top for anyone ‘cause we don't want mercenaries. Caged Warriors is all about blood, sweat and hard work. As a result, when the fighting starts, you will only find top quality matchups, none of that kids stuff.
JJ: This seems like an obvious question; will the fights be held inside a cage?
MF: Yup, inside the cage is where the war happens.
JJ: When can we expect the first event?
MF: It is already booked for late October.
JJ: Any fighters or matchups you think fans should be extra excited about?
MF: So far, we are working on getting more class signings. But yeah, a couple of names pop up. Keep an eye on Sam Salter and Riku Nobunga. Expect fireworks out of those two.
JJ: Will do, boss. Last question, what does the future hold for Caged Warriors MMA?
MF: I just want to see us take baby steps for now. Most importantly make sure the managers and fighters in here are actually happy to stay in Caged Warriors. But yeah, like everyone, I also dream of turning this organization to the best there will be one day.
JJ: Good to know. A focus on keeping fighters and managers happy, you heard it here folks. Come check it out for yourselves. Hey, uhhh, what’s in your mug? *Leans over to try to look into Matty’s mug* They gave me apple juice. *Takes a sip out of his straw* What do you have? It doesn't smell like apple juice. What is it?
MF: It’s coffee, Jenkins. Are we done?
JJ: No no I think…
*Jenkins leans over to try to look into Matty’s mug again, this time he leans too far and spills the contents, which appears to be beer. Jenkins looks at Matty and then the camera and gulps. Just as he does, Matty’s phone starts to vibrate violently again*
Fade to black
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