2016-09-08
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RFC 6: Starburst

Event Review: RFC 6: Starburst
Rebirth Fighting Championship 285K & 300K
2016-09-03, Hilo, Hayashi's Lounge - Hilo
Attendance:2,000, Event Rating:121
Author:The Impaler

 RFC 6: Starburst brought to us by Hilo’s own Vikai Gear!!! The merchandise partner of Rebirth FC! Be sure to check them out, as Vikai has some reasonably priced clothing for your fighters.

 

The latest installment of RFC was one for the record books!!!!!! A record breaking crowd was on hand to see the action. In a surprise move, Hawaii’s own President Barack Obama was on hand for the show. Obama is rumored to be a huge Cadwallader fan. The President looked a little uneasy when he saw George R R Martin was on hand, as usual, for Tarly’s fight. Also on hand were RFC fighters Hanzo Hasashi, Taichi Katino, “The Sultan of Swing” Raja Khan and Spanyard Kruger. Hanzo was already talking up a match with Tarly before the event could even start. Hanzo claimed he was there to step in if Cadwallader had an unfortunate showering accident ala Kevin Randleman. On hand with Hanzo and Katino were Japanese models, Kurara Chibana and former Miss Japan Miyuki Miyazaki. Imaler was also entertaining from free agents as always. Julio Cezar and Dio Reaper were in Impaler’s personal box. They were joined by the lovely University of Hawaii’s cheerleaders, Jessica Biel and Emma Watson. Philadelphia Eagles QBs Carson Wentz and Sam Bradford were on hand. However, Sam got a call early into the event, and things appeared to get a little awkward.

 

155 lbs  Pete Jacobs vs Ming Dienasty     KO (Punches)    1              02:27    

 

The first fight of the main card saw King Ming Dienasty face off against “The Slaughter” Pete Jacobs. Pete is making his debut in RFC, but had already left his mark on the organization before he ever signed a contract. Pete already holds wins over multiple RFC fighters. Once Impaler saw Pete fight he knew he had to sign the Leeds native. King Ming, Osaka Japan’s most dangerous man, said pre fight he was going to stop Jacob’s run of beating RFC fighters. However besting Jacobs proved to be easier said than done. King Ming, rumored to be looking for friends in Hawaii, quickly got to know Pete’s left and right hand. Shortly thereafter, Pete being the nice guy he is, introduced King Ming to the RFC mat.

 

265+ lbs Make You Bleed vs Toby Coleman          Decision (Unanimous)   3              05:00    

 

The second match on the card saw “The Arrogant Ambassador” Toby Coleman taking on the man Impaler calls the future of the RFC Super Heavyweight Division, Make You Bleed. MYB, accompanied to the cage by his brothers of the Steel Penn order, looked ready to seriously hurt someone. Credit has to be given to Toby, who has a solid chin, for taking the punishment MYB was dishing out. In his last fight MYB did not make his opponent bleed, and was swiftly punished for it by his Steel Penn brethren after the fight. MYB seemed to have learned his lesson, as he sliced and diced Coleman throughout the match. By the third round Coleman looked like he was facing Freddy Kruger, not MYB. Coleman probably felt like he was in his worst nightmare as MYB shot after shot, while Coleman struggled with his accuracy with blood pouring into his eyes. After the fight the Steel Penn Order came to the cage with a ceremonial knife and beckoned for MYB to take Coleman’s heart, but Impaler hastily came to the cage and put the kibosh on the ceremony. Impaler told MYB he would have to settle for figuratively taking Coleman’s heart, which he had already done in the fight.

 

155 lbs  Drako Bravo vs Neil McArthy      Submission (Armbar)     1              02:49

 

The third fight on the RFC card saw Drako Bravo facing Neil McArthy. Drako is fresh off of terrorizing opponents in Arena Fighting Championships, and now steps into the RFC cage. Neil unfortunately has been through a rough road in RFC after facing top contenders Algernon Cadwallader and Hanzo Hasashi in his previous RFC bouts. But Drako, out of the legendary LOD alliance, would show no mercy to McArthy. The early takedown was only a formality. If you blinked when the bell sounded you would have assumed the match started with Drako in side control. Once the fight hit the ground it was clear Neil was in hot water. Drako transitioned from on sub to another before finally catching an arm dangling loose for a slick arm bar finish.

 

265+ lbs Holly Stackhouse vs Mega Pope               KO (Superman Punch)   1              02:31    

 

The co-main event saw “The Tank” Holly Stackhouse, the most feared man in RFC’s SHW division, facing off against the man Hilo crowds have christened “The Holy Roller” for his sweet BJJ skills, Mega Pope. Mega Pope is coming off two stellar wins, and was looking to add Holly to the list. Mega Pope seemed unfazed by the fighter who has been ducked by several RFC SHW fighters already without ever stepping into the RFC cage. Rumor has it Tony Duncan went on his current hiatus after he was given the fight offer for Holly. It seems a lot of the RFC SHW roster turned yellow after Holly arrived. But Mega Pope was not one of them, but maybe he should have been. Holly wasted no time in putting his fists to His Holiness. Mega Pope was on his heels so quickly he could only manage one half-hearted takedown attempt in the fight before ending up on the receiving end a Holly Stackhouse Superman Punch. The cage was quickly filled with the inner city kids Holly mentor’s in his spare time. Holly grabbed the microphone and pointed his huge finger at Impaler while yelling “FEED…..ME…..MORE!!!!!!!!!!” Somewhere Vince McMahon was heard screaming trademark infringement at a lawyer.

 

155 lbs  Algernon Cadwallader vs Samwell Tarly TKO (Strikes)      2              04:08     155 lbs Title        

 

Finally the main event of the night was one for the ages, as crowd favorite Samwell Tarly faced off against the man who has taken RFC by storm, Algernon Cadwallader. Pre-fight Algernon was quoted as saying, “Samwell thinks he is just going to walk into RFC 6 with the belt and walk out with the belt, but he is wrong. There is a pitfall on his path named Algernon Cadwallader.” President Obama gave his secret service men to Algernon to accompany him to the cage through the Pro-Tarly crowd. Tarly then came from the back stage area riding on the Iron Throne with Lena Headey and Rose Lesley on his lap with “The Rains of Castamere” blaring in the speakers. The song caused the secret service to quickly surround the president in case of an attack. George R R Martin was seen giving an evil laugh at the sight. Once all the hoopla was over, the action in the cage was fast and furious. Algernon appeared to be well trained by his people, as he appeared to have an answer for everything Tarly threw at him. Tarly, possibly distracted by all the publicity and fame, appeared off his game. Tarly, as master in the clinch, was even beaten at his own game by Algernon. At one point Cadwallader even mocked Tarly, telling him he was going to get knocked out. Much to the glee of President Obama and the dismay of the crowd, Algernon followed up on his promise, landing a huge uppercut from the clinch to finish Tarly’s night and sending him back to Westeros without his beloved belt. Algernon then took the mic and told the Hilo fans, who loved Samwell so much, they could shove it while hoisting the belt in one hand and a middle finger from the other. A spit fountain rained down from the crowd as Algernon continued to taunt the Hilo natives with his belt. The president was quickly ushered out of the arena by secret service, but not before quickly taking a selfie with the new champ and his spit shined belt. 

 

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