Nati's Confessions

Fighter profile of Nati Pisswater by Chris Karter

 The Confessions of a Loser begin when one fighter expresses doubt before the fight and seemingly concedes victory to his opponent. That is what YABAI prospect Nati PissWater and his manager Hare Rumpler essentially did over the weekend when they admitted they were in for a double-header ass whooping by Chris Karter, aka White Jesus, aka the KO King, aka the GOAT.

Nati is an exceptional boxer, an exceptional muay thai artist, remarkable wrestler, and a purple belt in BJJ. He trains in all facets of MMA. Nati has squashed some regional cans enroute to a title shot with his only loss since his debut being a razor thin decision against Sosa's rival Lorenzo Benedetti.

The HFC 145 lb champion is Marcello Sosa, an up and coming Colombian superstar that fights like a hurricane - a whirlwind of crazy fist and spinny shit - only to Wanderlei his opponents with a filet of knees and elbows in the clinch. His 11-1-1 record is one of the most impressive in all of the 350K ID land, and Nati is a massive underdog on paper.

"Do you have any tricks up your sleeve?" A reporter from Tycoon Times ask Nati pre-fight.

......

With a lisp Nati replied in an unknown dialect of squawky hogwash and strange syllables. Was that English? Was it Mandarin? Did Nati just have a seizure? Maybe he suffered a poor weight cut. All but his fight team look concerned as Nati drilled on his chin and his lazy left eye wander on it's own.

Turns out, Nati is from parts unknown. Nobody understands the Rosetta Stone language that he speaks except his small tribe of inbred Asians. In Parts Unknown the Du-Cou-Sin-In-Bak-Hol festival is a popular tradition amid the people.

Nati has the ability to cheese his way to being competitive but  we predict that ultimately he will succumb to Sosa's fist of fury.

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