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 Madness Insanity Review with Mister Madness!
"Paddy O'Malley's was the place to be on January 21rst, for the reboot of Madness MMA's INSANITY series. A series of true VIOLENCE and ANARCHY for the whole family of course, you know my Gam Gam loved the show. The Main Card was full of finishes, all 5 in fact(4 submissions). Enough of the chit chat let's take a quick glance at the preliminary card. And...Here...We...Go.
Prelims
Testy Three def Baldur Kristjansson TKO(Punches) RD.1 (3:13) Testy was landing at will! After a big left wobbled Baldur, a flurry of shots followed and I'm pretty sure even his third testy got one in clean.
Jaxton Kidd def Anthony Lawyer Submission(Arm Triangle) RD.3 (3:37) Lawyer was clearly ahead with just a few minutes to go thanks to his masterful dry humping skills. The dry hump art does tire both the humper and humpee, which was evident when Kidd locked in a NASTY arm triangle for the victory.
Libertad Muerte def Chad Zoff Unanimous Decision Libertad was not the most accurate of the night but he was the aggressor as he dominated. Zoff may have to rethink his game plan as he seemed to just try Head kicks as well as the clinch-break clinch, which really just pisses your opponent's off.
Markus Maverick def Rian Tully Unanimous Decision This one was all "Maniac"! After a early knockdown at the beginning of the fight that opened a cut, Tully was doing well on the feet later, but his constant failed takedowns where his DEMISE.
RaJon Shaw missed weight badly and for that he will not be attending the MADNESS pancake after party. Opponent George Walker will be awarded his win bonus via the No Contest.
Main Card
Jonas Jones def Darth Banzai Submission(Kneebar) RD. 2 (3:57) This was a true gift of a Main Card opener and was a runner up for "Fight of the Night". Banzai came out GUNS BLAZING and was very close to finishing the fight slightly past the one minute mark, until a perfectly timed Desperation takedown was landed by Jonas. Banzai though seemed to have lost a step though as he started round 2 ahead on the scorecards. Jones Takedwon in round two spelled DISASTER for Darth , and points to Jonas for apologizing just prior to his Kneebar submission.
*Fight of the Night*
Mi Shin Ii def TJ Thompson Submission(Guillotine) RD. 3 (3:27) Are "Fight of the Night" was a highly contested dry hump display as TJ Thompson seemed to have full control of the fight, he just wasn't doing anything besides spooning his opponent to near unconscious state hahahaha. Shin though was awake enough to lock in a deep guillotine with roughly a minute and a half to go in the fight.
*Submission of the Night*
Maximus Nut Shot def Joe Glover Submission RD. 1 (2:27) Joe just could not get anything going besides a body shot. Maximus needed no Nut shots in this one just a brilliant display of grapple vision as he transitioned from a kimura to a neck cranking Guillotine lickety split. Nut shot moves to 2-0 as a pro and earns his first performance bonus. Meanwhile Joe has some obvious holes to fix but don't count the "Golden" one out just yet!
Co-Main Event
"KO of the Night"
Billy Sampson def Doc Hoya TKO(Strikes) RD. 1 (0:51) In a battle of two undefeated young Bantamweights it was all Billy Sampson in this one as he now stands atop The Division at 3-0. Sampson simply smeshed his opponent with a few DEATHLY timed grounds strikes, including a lovely elbow which forced referee Big Dong McFarley to intervene.
Main Event
Luca Anacoreta def Charlie Johnston Submission(Armbar) RD. 1 (3:50) "Anaconda" Anacoreta strikes again! Luca welcomed Charlie Johnston into the sport with a SUFFOCATING showing of ground fighting. A fight changer was apparent the moment when Johnston decided to clinch, never clinch with an Anaconda, Food for thought. Luca is now 4-0 as a pro ,and the Middleweight contender has won all 4 by FRIGHTENING submission. As for the "Ko Machine" this event was in favor of the grapplers but like I always say "What does not kill you, only makes you stranger" get back in the gym kid and if your going to clinch with a Anaconda yo better be ready to slice and dice the big snake up!
A slithering display of submission skills was the way Madness Insanity 1 was won. 5 submissions in all, I still say be a MAN and STAND though but to each their own.
Stay tuned MADNESS MANIACS! My least favorite Drunken Irish journalist counterpart Douche McBaggins will be covering the"Kings of Madness" Middleweight Tournament very y soon.
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