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 LOM Season 3 Finale
Saturday Night in Montreal the Long and Arduous journey of the four LOM 3 Finalist will come to an end. They will all be unleashed onto their Natural habitat properly. For two men there will be a Championship title on the line, and for the other two Just a Million dollars in blood money for now. All four will head into their 5 rounders with purpose though and that is to become the League of MADNESS Champion! Interesting enough the Inaugural League of Madness Winner Mohammed Kahn will be fighting the very next Day at Combate. I got a feeling a few of these guys could be Future Headliners for a big org too, if they say their Prayers and there TRT Vitamins like good little boys.
With this said let me turn things over to the Long Time League of Madness Reporter Mr. Madness himself, to preview these two LOM3 Finals matchups!
Good evening, ladies and Murderers! It has been yet another violently disturbing season of the League of Madness. Team Hitler, I mean Team Alfred systematically jerked the carpet from right under the opposing team's feet. In my opinion it all started when their top pick rearranged the other sides #1 picks face in week 3. Team Gwad however did have one little Hillbilly glimmer of Light in that outspoken Aussie Outlaw JJ Hopson, I kind of like the kid. If you ever want to get out of this MMA nonsense come see me Jessie James, I will make ya a real outlaw Kiddo! All in all, it has been fun, and I had a good laugh so let's end this Circus in style, shall we!
Bantamweight Midget Final!
A new CFC champion will be crowned as are first two LOM finalist face off in the Mini man bracket. This one is gonna be an Irritatingly fun shindig as "The Runt of Outlaws" looks to yap his opponents big dumbo ears right off with his Over inflated dreams. For crying out loud I'm not happy that a man given the name Irritator would be so damned quiet, maybe he was given the name because his Daddy is a prick. This would explain why the kid has gotten this far, My daddy was a real prick too and look where it's gotten me in life!
Jessie James Hopson has quite the impressive beard for a 19-year-old degenerate, I guess it's something in the water down there in the Land down under aye mate? Hopson stole the show in Week 1 with a Counter Takedown and pure dominance on the mat against Hamzah Barnaby. He then went on to call out one of the more feared Cheesers in all the land Parmesan Cheese, as he grated him nicely in rounds 2 and 3 in route to a Unanimous Decision victory. In the Semi Finals JJ was matched up with a guy in a suit and tie, with the intent to make the other guy DIE! unfortunately for Phil Sprintin though His performance in rounds 2 and 3 where about as bad as that recent rhyme I just dropped for ya. This Hopson kid has shown that he comes alive in the Later rounds, where he likes to rabbit punch the ever-living hell out of his victims.
Randy The Irritator "Tessin" has quite possibly the most unorganized name I have ever seen in my miserable life. With his Performance here in the LOM3 tourney though, we will let it slide this time. Randy would have to be considered the Darkhorse of the tournament being picked in the tenth round. Now I love a guy who has a chip on his shoulder and Irritator has to have one because he has really disrupted the establishments order in this show, with his drive. Randy took out Von Vincent in the opening round with a Guillotine submission. In round two The Irritator shocked his Teammate Gaston Juncker by winning a Vigorous decision verdict. Finally in the semi's he took all that transgression out on Zane Raven with a dominant 3rd round TKO victory. Now that's what I call a Hat trick laddy!
Honestly, I like both of these little guys and I'm truly excited for the Violence that should be coming in this one. Matter of fact I need to be in the cage for this one maybe I will be a surprise guest referee for this fight. After all I am a man of many talents. Hopson vs The Irritator winner will be crowned the very first CFC Bantamweight Champion along with a nice Million of Butcherino's hard earned Avatar making cash. Now boys don't drop the ball here it's a MAD, MAD world we are living in, and we want BLOOD and VIOLENCE now give it to us.
Manager spotlight: JJ Hopson was brought to the kumite of Madness by none other than the King of Consent himself Jason Hopson and something tells me this little vigilante of enthusiasm is basically Jason in Bearded disguise. This was Jason's first Tournament experience as I was told, and he came into this with a cockiness like no other and has backed it up in style. On the other hand, Master Tessin has really made a name for himself in this tournament as well. He himself recalls his recent trend in these types of dealios' as a disgusting act of pain and suffering. Randy the Irritator though has brought life into this veteran MMA manager, as it has shown in other recent Tournaments like the Winter Warfare.
Super Heavyweight Monster Final!
Now let's bring out the Clowns, I mean Beef, and there is none beefier then the "Beef King" himself Lenny King. Meanwhile the man, the myth, the legend Apollo Creed has shown to be nothing short of excellence ducking and weaving himself into the Main Stage for the LOM3 finale. All jokes aside these two monsters have been ruthless killers from start to finish and one of these Monsters will have their LOM Season cemented with yet another Highlight reel KO very Soon. If not well the jokes on me, and a little secret the jokes never on me. Someone will get knocked the Funk out here.
Once the Music "Living in America" hits be ready cause the man of the hour Apollo Creed will strut his way down to the cage like only he can do. Where have I seen this guy? It's almost like he jumped right out of the Movie screen yet I just can't put it all together. Anyway, Creed has proven to have some of the most Dream shattering KO Power in recent years as displayed in all three of his One Punch KO finishes. His first fight he went superman on dat ho, known as Schendon Braub with a vicious Superman Punch in round numero uno. In his second-round fight, he took out his Teammate and #1 pick Dante McGinley in just 32 seconds with a walk off KO. Finally in the Semifinals going against Evil Hitlers orders. "to take the fall", Apollo took out yet another Teammate in Carlo Pedersoli with a flash KO just 5 seconds into the second round of their semifinal matchup.
On the other side of this battle of the Behemoths is a guy who somehow has looked more deadly than even Mr. Creed, finishing all of his opponents in the very first round. If I had to pick one guy from this tournament to use as a stick-up man, it has to be this Bold bearded ALABAMAAAAA bastard right here. I mean who's going standup to this monstrosity of a man, unless you got a Bazooka on hand, which I always do! Kings path of violence started in very similar fashion to Creed with a Superman punch KO of Kadaris Thibodeaux. Thank f$$k they didn't call it the Batmanpunch or I would be a bitter Betsy for having to spew that nonsense multiple times. His second round fight he somehow took down the Giant himself Randal Clappertron after an early Knockdown scare, in what can only be portrayed as 29 seconds of Earth-Shattering Chaos. And finally in the Semi Finals it was quite embarrassing for King, as it took him a staggering 2 minutes and 46 seconds to finish off another teammate in Oliver Hardy, disgusting big guy you should ashamed it took you that long!
No Title on the line here as The Beef King has chosen to put his MMA career on hold for a little while (Probably got some pig F44king to do back home in the holler). This won't take away from this showdown one bit though, as someone is going to have their face impaled surely hahahahahahahah, forgive my laughter, I have condition ya see. If this does somehow, someway go to a boring Decision, rest assure I will burn the damn Montreal Sports Complex to the ground!
Manager Spotlight: Young Man Joe River has done it yet again! The man pulling the strings behind LOM 1 Runner up Ralph McGuire is back in the Finals with another young prospect. This time around, he got a ill sweet redemption beating his old foe Chris Karter's pupil Dante McKinley in stunning fashion. Now a three Time LOM competition manager, Joe River, we salute you! On the other end of the cage will be Squirrely Dan returning to the LOM for his second appearance, this time making a huge statement with his entrant. Dan has been on quite the role of his own. Much like Tessin, he is still hanging around in the Winter Warfare tournament as well. Dan and Joe, two members of the Wolfpack. Like a real wolfpack there is always going to be a chest beating contest, and tomorrow night will see which wolf's howl will reign supreme.
"Parting is such sweet sorrow, dearest. Still, you can't say we didn't show you a good time. Enjoy yourself out there in the asylum. Just don't forget: If it ever gets too tough, there's always a place for you here." -Mr. MADNESS
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