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PBP Commentary |
Coming up we have a featherweight MMA rules bout between Scrotie McBoogerballs (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and janpeter kurkela (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). kurkela has chosen Korpiklaani:Forest Man as his entrance music. Buckle up people - heeeeeeeeeere we go!
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173 cm
19
150 lbs
0 - 0 - 0 |
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182 cm
21
147 lbs
5 - 6 - 0 |
BJJ White Belt
Solid Muay Thai
Granite chin |
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BJJ Blue Belt
Brawler
Solid chin |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the featherweight division. Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner. With a record of
0 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Scrotie McBoogerballs! And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner. With a record of
5 - 6 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, janpeter kurkela! The judges for this bout are Anni Minnemäki, Arvi Lind and Johanna Lukiainen.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway! McBoogerballs closes the distance and presses his opponent up against the cage. The referee is keeping an eye on McBoogerballs - much more stalling and he will separate the fighters.
With the fighters clinched against the cage, McBoogerballs creates a bit of distance for himself and scores with a nice uppercut. McBoogerballs lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of kurkela backwards. McBoogerballs is working kurkela over against the cage. kurkela is trying to slow down the pace in the clinch, to catch his breath. McBoogerballs pushes kurkela back against the cage and lands a hook to the side of the head. McBoogerballs throws a blind hook that connects with the side of kurkelas head. McBoogerballs stalling against the cage.
McBoogerballs throws a hook to the body. More of an arm punch but it's all scoring with the judges. kurkela is a painfully thin specimen of a man. You do wonder whether a good body kick would snap him clean in two. A hook to the body from McBoogerballs.
McBoogerballs stalling here - the referee won't stand for too much of that.
kurkela throws an elbow that misses.
kurkela tries to pull guard but McBoogerballs won't allow it.
McBoogerballs lands a shoulder strike. A real battle for position is taking place between these two warriors. McBoogerballs working some nice short punches in the clinch. McBoogerballs lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of kurkela backwards. McBoogerballs lands with a good tight uppercut to the head. McBoogerballs breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
McBoogerballs connects with a hook to the side of his opponent's head. janpeter kurkela seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout. McBoogerballs tests kurkela's chin there with a solid looking shot. A good leg kick by McBoogerballs. kurkela looks gassed!
That's one minute gone in the round. McBoogerballs throws a nice outside leg kick. McBoogerballs scores with a jab to the jaw. A left lands for McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs slips in close and lands a nice hook before moving back out of range. McBoogerballs feints and then cracks kurkela's leading leg with a nice low kick. He's obviously looking to slow kurkela down. McBoogerballs lands a leg kick. The shin dug right into the meat of the thigh. McBoogerballs stooping low to avoid any incoming strikes and then lunges in with an uppercut come cross that lands flush. McBoogerballs punishes kurkela's body with a nice straight punch. Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show! The fighters circle momentarily. McBoogerballs darts into range and connects with a nice straight punch. kurkela takes a nice looking leg kick right on the meat of his thigh there.
kurkela chopped to the floor by a nice leg kick but he springs right back up before McBoogerballs can pounce on him.
Good leg kick by McBoogerballs there. It's the ones that make that thud noise that hurt and that was an almighty thud.
A chopping leg kick lands by McBoogerballs. kurkela needs to keep his hands up - McBoogerballs had a free shot at his head there. kurkela wants to clinch but McBoogerballs slips to the side and McBoogerballs counters by clinching up. McBoogerballs stalling the fight.
McBoogerballs stays in close to his opponent and throws a right hand to the body. kurkela takes a shot to the head. McBoogerballs lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of kurkela backwards. McBoogerballs is leaning against kurkela and scores with a nice uppercut to the body. McBoogerballs gets through kurkela's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head. McBoogerballs holding his opponent close, against the cage.
McBoogerballs lands with a quick shot inside that doesn't really do much damage.
That's two minutes gone in the round. McBoogerballs lands a shot to the body. A nice right hand lands inside from McBoogerballs. An uppercut to the body lands inside from McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs lands an uppercut. McBoogerballs is stalling here.
McBoogerballs lands with a short shot to the head. McBoogerballs lands with a short shot to the head. McBoogerballs lands a shoulder strike. McBoogerballs lands a right hand that snaps the head of kurkela backwards. McBoogerballs stalls. McBoogerballs escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
McBoogerballs lands a vicious shot with the stealth of a sniper and the strength of a viper. Are vipers that strong? I can think of lots of things that are stronger than a viper - not many rhyme with sniper though.
McBoogerballs cracks kurkela with a nice right hand that draws applause from the crowd. kurkela stumbles momentarily as he takes a strong leg kick from McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs with a nice looking leg kick. You could hear that one land in a back row.
McBoogerballs is looking to slow kurkela down with leg kicks. McBoogerballs explodes with a nice body kick and back out of range. Nice work. kurkela on the wrong end of a nice jab. McBoogerballs cracks the inside of kurkela's front leg. kurkela on the wrong end of a nice jab.
That's three minutes gone in the round. McBoogerballs lands a front kick. McBoogerballs fakes the leg kick and cracks kurkela in the body. Nice body kick from McBoogerballs. kurkela takes a shot to the nose. Hopefully that hasn't broken it. McBoogerballs scoring well with a low kick there.
kurkela's leg has a nasty welt from taking a succession of leg kicks. That must be slowing him down. McBoogerballs buckles his opponent's knee momentarily with a nice leg kick.
McBoogerballs lands a slapping body shot.
McBoogerballs feints and then cracks kurkela's leading leg with a nice low kick. He's obviously looking to slow kurkela down. McBoogerballs connects nicely with a jab. Noted by the judges no doubt. Nice uppercut there from McBoogerballs. Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show! McBoogerballs throws a quick inside leg kick. McBoogerballs lands a body shot.
McBoogerballs thows a body kick. kurkela tries to catch it but that hurt him. McBoogerballs scoring well with a low kick there.
McBoogerballs dips down and scores with a jab to the body. McBoogerballs scores with a big left there. The judges will like that one. Jab by McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs thumps kurkela with a low kick. McBoogerballs throws a shot to the body.
Nice straight punches there by McBoogerballs. You know Roy Jones Jr respects the hands of McBoogerballs.
That's four minutes gone in the round. kurkela takes a shot to the eye socket. That's gotta hurt. McBoogerballs with a nice looking leg kick. You could hear that one land in a back row.
kurkela drops his hands momentarily and McBoogerballs takes advantage with a crisp shot to the head. kurkela chopped to the floor by a nice leg kick but he springs right back up before McBoogerballs can pounce on him.
A shot to de liver by McBoogerballs. Beautiful body shot. Scrotie McBoogerballs is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs. McBoogerballs lands a leg kick. The shin dug right into the meat of the thigh. Like a baseball bat into the meat of his leg there - nice leg kick by McBoogerballs.
McBoogerballs lands with a cross. kurkela walks into a left hand. McBoogerballs throws a nice outside leg kick. kurkela takes a really solid shot there but just smiles back and shrugs his shoulders.
McBoogerballs throws a leg kick which misses kurkela's front leg but catches the back leg as kurkela tries to avoid it. kurkela gets cracked there but stands up to it.
Good leg kick by McBoogerballs there. It's the ones that make that thud noise that hurt and that was an almighty thud.
kurkela takes a body punch but keeps moving. The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action! McBoogerballs scores with a reasonable looking shot to the body. kurkela doesn't seem bothered though. McBoogerballs with a body punch. A glancing blow. McBoogerballs lands a jab followed by a nice looking cross.
kurkela is pinned up against the cage taking some big shots here. The referee is looking closely deciding whether he should stop the fight.
kurkela has a pretty nasty looking mouse under his right eye. A left lands for McBoogerballs. And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Scrotie McBoogerballs dominated that round. Well, the break between rounds is over. Let's get back to the scrappin!
McBoogerballs cracks kurkela with a good shot that sees him stumbling back into the cage. Nice takedown defense from McBoogerballs. No joy for kurkela on that attempt. McBoogerballs throws a quick inside leg kick. McBoogerballs cracks kurkela with a hook to the jaw. Both fighters smile at eachother and high-five before getting back down to business. McBoogerballs lands a nice looking body shot.
McBoogerballs with a body punch. A glancing blow. McBoogerballs dips to his left and cracks kurkela with an uppercut! kurkela on the wrong end of a nice jab. McBoogerballs gets in close and instigates a clinch. kurkela takes a shot to the head. McBoogerballs stalling in the clinch.
McBoogerballs lands a body shot. McBoogerballs lands a body punch - he's looking to wear down kurkela. McBoogerballs slows down the pace here.
A body shot lands from McBoogerballs.
kurkela is breathing heavily. McBoogerballs looking to throw knees to the head but kurkela is blocking nicely.
McBoogerballs lands a left hand that snaps the head of kurkela backwards. A short right hand to the side of the head by McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs lands with a left to the head. McBoogerballs displaying some good clinch control by pressing kurkela up against the cage. A short right from McBoogerballs.
That's one minute gone in the round. McBoogerballs is struggling to control the position. McBoogerballs lands a hook to the body. It's hard to tell if that hurt kurkela or not. McBoogerballs lands a right hand. McBoogerballs comes over the top with an elbow. That landed flush. McBoogerballs is stalling here.
A short right hand to the side of the head by McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs lands a hook to the side of the head. McBoogerballs makes some space for himself and lands an uppercut. McBoogerballs lands a hook that snaps the head of kurkela backwards. McBoogerballs is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that kurkela can do to turn this around? McBoogerballs lands a left hand that snaps the head of kurkela backwards. McBoogerballs is leaning against kurkela and scores with a nice uppercut to the body. McBoogerballs works for underhooks and lands a body shot in the process.
McBoogerballs gets an overhook and lands an elbow to the side of the head. McBoogerballs just leaning against kurkela, taking a breather. McBoogerballs lands a right hand. McBoogerballs lands a body punch - he's looking to wear down kurkela. McBoogerballs lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of kurkela backwards. McBoogerballs lands with a right to the head.
That's two minutes gone in the round. McBoogerballs lands with a short punch from the clinch.
Stalling in the clinch from McBoogerballs.
A short right from McBoogerballs on the inside. McBoogerballs softening up his opponent with strikes, against the cage. McBoogerballs gets through kurkela's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head. McBoogerballs lands a body shot. McBoogerballs lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of kurkela backwards. McBoogerballs leaning his opponent against the cage. McBoogerballs lands a body shot in the clinch.
McBoogerballs working on landing some head shots here - that one got through nicely. McBoogerballs lands with a light punch inside. A short right from McBoogerballs on the inside. kurkela misses with an elbow strike.
A short left from McBoogerballs. A right handed body shot lands from McBoogerballs.
A short left from McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs lands with a right to the head. A short body shot lands from McBoogerballs as the two fighters clinch.
Nice body punch from McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat. McBoogerballs punishes kurkela's body with a nice straight punch. janpeter kurkela is looking to throw some combinations by the looks of things. McBoogerballs scoring well with a low kick there.
That's three minutes gone in the round. McBoogerballs changes levels and scores with a jab to the body. kurkela takes one on the chin but keeps coming.
McBoogerballs listening to his corner there, landing a nice uppercut. McBoogerballs scores with a hook. McBoogerballs lands an overhand right. kurkela ducks right into an uppercut from McBoogerballs. kurkela takes one on the chin but keeps coming.
McBoogerballs lands a lovely overhand right. McBoogerballs works kurkela's body with a nice hook. kurkela has his head slapped from side to side by a 3 punch combination. That must have hurt him. McBoogerballs thumps kurkela with a low kick. kurkela takes a body punch that cleary hurt but he's trying not to show any weakness. Scrotie McBoogerballs is winning the standup battle so far. McBoogerballs slips in close and lands a nice hook before moving back out of range. McBoogerballs scores with a nice one two combo and darts back out of range to avoid anything coming in the opposite direction. Boom, another hit is landed. "You're gunna get knocked out" taunts McBoogerballs, as that shot connected.
McBoogerballs throws a leg kick which misses kurkela's front leg but catches the back leg as kurkela tries to avoid it. McBoogerballs stuns kurkela with a nice body shot, before stepping back out of range. Thud! ouch! good body kick from McBoogerballs - that will leave a mark!
McBoogerballs cracks kurkela with a good jab.
That's four minutes gone in the round. kurkela tries to move into range but McBoogerballs moves to the side and lands with a nice right hand. McBoogerballs slips in close and lands a nice hook before moving back out of range. McBoogerballs digs a good body shot into kurkela's ribs. McBoogerballs stooping low to avoid any incoming strikes and then lunges in with an uppercut come cross that lands flush. A jab from McBoogerballs does it's job there. A slapping leg kick lands for McBoogerballs.
McBoogerballs drives through and clinches with kurkela against the cage.
This has been an exciting period of action! McBoogerballs just leaning against kurkela, taking a breather. McBoogerballs gets a warning from the ref for wasting time. kurkela takes an elbow to the forehead. A bit of stalling here from McBoogerballs.
The crowd applaud the fighters efforts here as the round comes to an end. The ref breaks the fighters up, due to lack of action by Scrotie McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs scores with a sloppy right hand. kurkela should have avoided that one. McBoogerballs ducks down and throws a hook to the body. McBoogerballs throws a nice outside leg kick. kurkela on the wrong end of a nice hook. McBoogerballs throws a jab to the body, straight down the pipe. Boom. That sent kurkela stumbling backwards but he manages to regain his composure quickly. And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Scrotie McBoogerballs dominated that second round. That's time! McBoogerballs's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight. Let's hear some noise people - this is the final round!
McBoogerballs thumps kurkela with a low kick. kurkela closes this distance looking for a takedown but McBoogerballs circles away. McBoogerballs closes the distance and lands a one-two. McBoogerballs dances in quickly and lands a nice inside leg kick on kurkela. That did some damage! Good exchange - McBoogerballs coming out on top. kurkela takes a really solid shot there but just smiles back and shrugs his shoulders.
McBoogerballs with a body punch. A glancing blow. A slapping body kick lands there for McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs scores with a slapping inside leg kick. kurkela takes one on the chin but seems OK.
McBoogerballs keeps his opponent at a distance with a nice jab.
kurkela takes a shot right to the bread basket. McBoogerballs connects nicely with a jab. Noted by the judges no doubt. kurkela takes one to the chin there. McBoogerballs cracks kurkela with a good jab. kurkela doesn't react quick enough there as he takes a shot to the body. McBoogerballs moves into the clinch successfully.
McBoogerballs effectively controlling the action here. Both fighters are breathing heavily. McBoogerballs lands with a short head shot on the inside.
That's one minute gone in the round. McBoogerballs blocks an uppercut.
A body shot lands from McBoogerballs.
McBoogerballs throws a blind hook that connects with the side of kurkelas head. McBoogerballs has kurkela pushed against the cage. McBoogerballs lands a glancing elbow in the clinch. McBoogerballs lands with a quick shot inside that doesn't really do much damage. McBoogerballs lands a right hand. McBoogerballs content to slow the pace in the clinch.
McBoogerballs lands with a short head shot on the inside. A shot in the inside from McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs scores with a shot to the side of kurkela's head. A short right hand to the side of the head by McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs lands a hook to the side of the head. McBoogerballs has kurkela pushed against the cage. McBoogerballs presses kurkela against the cage and delivers a mid-strength body shot. McBoogerballs stalling the fight.
A right handed body shot lands from McBoogerballs.
kurkela's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button! Nice body punch from McBoogerballs - that landed with a thud.
McBoogerballs just leaning against kurkela, taking a breather. McBoogerballs lands with a good tight uppercut to the head. kurkela tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
That's two minutes gone in the round. The crowd are hurling abuse towards the fighters... You can hardly blame them though because there isn't a lot going on in the fight. A short uppercut from McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs stays in close to his opponent and throws a right hand to the body. McBoogerballs manages to break the clinch.
McBoogerballs comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range. McBoogerballs connects with a nice looking jab.
McBoogerballs throws a leg kick which misses kurkela's front leg but catches the back leg as kurkela tries to avoid it. McBoogerballs with a nice looking leg kick. You could hear that one land in a back row.
McBoogerballs scores with a sloppy punch to the body. Not much technique there but it did the business. McBoogerballs is looking to slow kurkela down with leg kicks. Like a baseball bat into the meat of his leg there - nice leg kick by McBoogerballs.
McBoogerballs connects with a looping right hand.
McBoogerballs lands a nice hook to kurkela's body. kurkela takes it in his stride and looks to land his own strikes. Good exchange - McBoogerballs coming out on top. McBoogerballs lands a right hook to the body.
kurkela steps to his left, right into the path of a big body kick from McBoogerballs. That one must have hurt. McBoogerballs lands a leg kick. The shin dug right into the meat of the thigh. McBoogerballs has managed to clinch.
McBoogerballs lands a right hand. McBoogerballs stalling the fight.
That's three minutes gone in the round. McBoogerballs lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage. Still in the clinch, McBoogerballs scores with a nice short uppercut. Scrotie McBoogerballs has scored more points in the clinch so far. Come on McBoogerballs - let's have some action - none of this stalling nonsense.
McBoogerballs lands a nice elbow. The pace slowing considerably in the clinch, as McBoogerballs takes a break from that fighting nonsense to think about the finer things in life. McBoogerballs lands a nice elbow. A short right hand to the side of the head by McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs scores with an uppercut up the middle. kurkela has developed a nice purple lump on his ribcage, as a result of some heavy body kicks from McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs lands a damaging elbow. McBoogerballs throws a blind hook that connects with the side of kurkelas head. Scrotie McBoogerballs is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach. Nice body punch from McBoogerballs. McBoogerballs stalling.
McBoogerballs digs a right hand into kurkela's ribs. Those have got to be taking their toll on kurkela's gas tank. A nice left hand lands by McBoogerballs.
McBoogerballs taking a break, stalling in the clinch.
kurkela tries a knee to the head but McBoogerballs blocks it.
McBoogerballs lands with a short head shot on the inside. McBoogerballs lands with a left to the head. kurkela tries to pull guard but McBoogerballs won't allow it.
That's four minutes gone in the round. The crowd are getting on the fighters' backs, as the pace has dropped off in the last minute or so. McBoogerballs softening up his opponent with strikes, against the cage. kurkela tries to land a knee to the head but McBoogerballs blocks with his arms.
McBoogerballs lands a shoulder strike that jolts his opponent's head backwards. McBoogerballs slows down the pace here.
kurkela takes a shot to the head. McBoogerballs controlling the action here for a moment.
kurkela takes a shot to the head. McBoogerballs breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat. McBoogerballs scores with a three punch combo!
janpeter kurkela has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here! kurkela closes the distance and takes a jab right on the nose as he does so. Nice uppercut there from McBoogerballs. Good standup being displayed there by McBoogerballs as he connects with a hook. That's a knee to de groin and it's over and out! kurkela crumples to the ground after an illegal strike from McBoogerballs - the referee stops the clock and kurkela gets 5 minutes to recover from that one. "I'm sorry" says McBoogerballs. kurkela manages to get back to his feet and the fight resumes. McBoogerballs lands a leg kick. The shin dug right into the meat of the thigh.
And that's the end of the fight! Scrotie McBoogerballs showed his dominance in that final round. Well McBoogerballs has outscored his opponent in every aspect of the fight today. Only a scarily incompetent judge or two will keep him from a well deserved win... Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.
Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision. Judge Anni Minnemäki scores the fight 30:24 Judge Arvi Lind scores the fight 30:24 Judge Johanna Lukiainen scores the fight 30:24
In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Scrotie McBoogerballs!
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S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
100% |
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