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PBP Commentary |
Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Evander Holyshit (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Lester Cockenschtuff (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Holyshit's ring entrance music is that housewives' favourite, Lil Wayne- I feel like dying. Cockenschtuff has chosen Wynona's Big Brown Beaver by Primus as his entrance music. Over to our ring announcer for the fighter introductions!
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196 cm
30
263 lbs
27 - 13 - 0 |
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193 cm
27
269 lbs
16 - 8 - 1 |
Good wrestling
World class boxer
Insanely flexible |
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Olympic wrestler
World class MT
Granite chin |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, for the heavyweight championship of the world! Introducing the champion to my left, fighting out of the red corner. With a record of
27 - 13 - 0, fighting out of New York, Evander Holyshit! And introducing the challenger to my right, fighting out of the blue corner. With a record of
16 - 8 - 1, fighting out of New York, Lester Cockenschtuff! The judges for this bout are Columbo Gatti, Anthony Taglia and Dean Styles.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway! Cockenschtuff has closed the distance and engaged Holyshit in a clinch.
Holyshit's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button! Holyshit breaks from the clinch.
A nice inside leg kick there by Cockenschtuff. That's going to slow Holyshit down. Cockenschtuff clinches with his opponent.
Cockenschtuff just leaning against Holyshit, taking a breather. Cockenschtuff working aggressively here.
Cockenschtuff lands a glancing elbow in the clinch.
It looks like Evander Holyshit has been cut. Cockenschtuff's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button! A nice right hand lands inside from Cockenschtuff. The crowd are loving this. Great action here. Cockenschtuff misses with a hook from the clinch. Cockenschtuff tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Cockenschtuff. Holyshit blocking some punches.
Cockenschtuff looking to throw knees to the head but Holyshit is blocking nicely.
Cockenschtuff misses with a knee to the head. Cockenschtuff slows down the pace here.
Holyshit has a body lock and is looking for a takedown. Cockenschtuff is bouncing around trying to prevent the takedown and somehow he has indeed managed to stay on his feet.
That's one minute gone in the round. Cockenschtuff goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
Cockenschtuff misses with some punches.
A short right from Cockenschtuff on the inside. Holyshit tries to throw a body punch but Cockenschtuff avoids it by throwing Holyshit back against the cage. Holyshit breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
No luck for Holyshit with that takedown attempt. Cockenschtuff takes a kick to the body and keeps moving. Cockenschtuff moves into range and lands a nice leg kick. The fighters circling - Holyshit throws out the jab but it was never going to land. A really sloppy takedown attempt there from Holyshit. That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Evander Holyshit. That's going to take a lot out of him. Cockenschtuff lands a pitter patter jab to the forehead of his opponent. Lester Cockenschtuff is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
That's two minutes gone in the round. This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff! Nice cross by Holyshit. Cockenschtuff misses with an uppercut. Holyshit saw that one coming. Holyshit throws a body kick, spinning off balance and Cockenschtuff counters by clinching up. A frustrated look appears on Holyshit's face as he tries to break the clinch. Cockenschtuff lands a right hand that snaps the head of Holyshit backwards. Holyshit blocking some punches.
Cockenschtuff missing with knees to the body.
Holyshit has dropped down and is looking to force the takedown but it's defended by Cockenschtuff after a bit of a struggle. Holyshit breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
Holyshit swings for the body but Cockenschtuff moves out of range.
Cockenschtuff fails with an attempt to clinch.
That's three minutes gone in the round. Cockenschtuff throws a nice outside leg kick. Holyshit takes a kick to the body and keeps moving. Holyshit swats away the attempt to clinch by Cockenschtuff. Holyshit misses with a hook to the body
and Cockenschtuff counters with a leg kick that reverborates around the arena. Cockenschtuff throws a body kick that misses. Cockenschtuff pushes Holyshit up against the cage in a clinch. Cockenschtuff lands an elbow inside that Holyshit shrugs off. A right hand to the body from Holyshit.
Cockenschtuff lands a nice elbow. Cockenschtuff is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. Holyshit is defending well for now. Cockenschtuff connects with a nasty looking knee right to Holyshit's face.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd. Holyshit lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of Cockenschtuff backwards. Cockenschtuff displaying some good clinch control by pressing Holyshit up against the cage.
That's four minutes gone in the round. Cockenschtuff tries a knee to the head but he's missed.
Cockenschtuff can't find room to land a body shot as Holyshit controls the action.
Holyshit is trying to push Cockenschtuff away but Cockenschtuff has him pressed against the cage, so he's going nowhere. Holyshit managing to block the knees to the body from Cockenschtuff.
Holyshit lands a hook to the side of the head. Cockenschtuff cracks Holyshit with a nice body shot. Holyshit tries for a takedown but Cockenschtuff manages to get underhooks.
Holyshit tries for a takedown. No joy.
Holyshit misses with a hook to the ribs.
Holyshit avoiding damage as Cockenschtuff throws knees to the body.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action! Holyshit blocks an uppercut.
Holyshit throws a hook to the body. More of an arm punch but it's all scoring with the judges. Holyshit prevents a body shot from Cockenschtuff. Cockenschtuff tries to land knees in the clinch but Holyshit avoids the damage to the body. And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Lester Cockenschtuff dominated that round. The cut man is working on Evander Holyshit's cut. The fighters get back to their feet, the hooter sounds and we're back to the action!
Cockenschtuff gets to the clinch - let's see what his plan is here. Holyshit tries for a takedown. No joy.
Kneeeeees! The crowd are calling for knees to the body. Cockenschtuff obliges. Cockenschtuff throws a nice elbow but it doesn't land.
Cockenschtuff working aggressively here.
Cockenschtuff throws a knee to the head but misses.
A nice left hand lands by Cockenschtuff.
Holyshit lands a takedown into guard.
We may be looking at a referee standup if the pace doesn't pick up soon. Holyshit trying to control the position from guard on top but Cockenschtuff is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can. This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff! Cockenschtuff looking to hit a scissor sweep but Holyshit is one step ahead there. The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work. The fighters are starting to get a bit slippery now, which will make submissions a bit more difficult. Holyshit with a flurry of punches that miss.
That's one minute gone in the round. Holyshit throws a big elbow that misses. Holyshit pressing down on his opponent's thigh, looking to pass guard. Cockenschtuff is keeping the position for now. Holyshit trying to control the position from guard on top but Cockenschtuff is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can. Cockenschtuff utilising some decent striking defenses from the guard, preventing the ground and pound.
That's two minutes gone in the round. Holyshit is fighting to break Cockenschtuff's control of his arms but Cockenschtuff is doing a good job of controlling the position at the moment.
It looks like we're going to have a standup here. Neither fighter is doing enough on the ground. Cockenschtuff connects with a lovely jab that went straight through the gap between Holyshit's hands. Holyshit throws a lazy uppercut
and Cockenschtuff counters with a nice leg kick. Cockenschtuff closes the distance and presses his opponent up against the cage. Holyshit throws a punch but it's blocked by Cockenschtuff. Cockenschtuff misses with a punch on the inside.
Cockenschtuff tries to work over Holyshit's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target. Cockenschtuff blocks an uppercut.
Holyshit blocking some punches.
Holyshit stalls.
That's three minutes gone in the round. Cockenschtuff lands a shot to the body. Holyshit misses with a hook to the ribs.
Holyshit wants to push off and get back to the center of the mat but Cockenschtuff has him pressed against the cage. Cockenschtuff scores with a shoulder strike. Holyshit blocks an elbow strike. Cockenschtuff goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
Holyshit takes a shot to the head. Cockenschtuff lands with a short punch from the clinch.
Holyshit wants to get back to striking at distance but Cockenschtuff won't allow it.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff! Cockenschtuff throws a punch but it's blocked by Holyshit. Cockenschtuff tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked. A short left from Cockenschtuff. Holyshit blocking some punches.
Cockenschtuff misses with a short punch on the inside.
That's four minutes gone in the round. Cockenschtuff lands with a left to the head. Cockenschtuff misses with a hook to the ribs.
Holyshit looking to stall.
Cockenschtuff throws a knee to the head but misses.
Cockenschtuff prevents a body shot from Holyshit. Cockenschtuff lands a damaging elbow. Cockenschtuff blocks a body shot from Holyshit. Cockenschtuff struggles to land a body shot inside as Holyshit controls his hands.
Cockenschtuff has Holyshit pressed against the cage, preventing Holyshit from circling away and getting back to striking at range. Holyshit blocks a body shot from Cockenschtuff. Cockenschtuff misses with some punches.
Lester Cockenschtuff seems to be working more effectively in the clinch in the fight so far. The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action! Cockenschtuff throws a knee to the head but misses.
Holyshit tries to score a body lock takedown but Cockenschtuff shows good agility there to stay on his feet. Cockenschtuff prevents a takedown attempt there.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Lester Cockenschtuff showed his class in that round. I'd imagine he'll take it on all the scorecards. The cut man is working on Evander Holyshit's cut. OK. That's time! The bell goes and we're back to the action.
Cockenschtuff throws a head kick that misses. Cockenschtuff will need to close the distance a bit before he attacks - that leg kick was thrown from too far away.
Holyshit ducks down and throws a hook to the body but Cockenschtuff moves away. Cockenschtuff is looking to score with low kicks. Holyshit checks a leg kick. Holyshit misses with a body shot
and Cockenschtuff counters nicely by changing levels and landing a hook to the body. Cockenschtuff moves in looking to clinch but Holyshit pushes him off. Cockenschtuff lands a jab to Holyshit's midsection. Cockenschtuff fails in his attempt to clinch. Cockenschtuff motions for Holyshit to come forward. Cockenschtuff throws a leg kick but it misses it's target.
That's one minute gone in the round. Cockenschtuff has managed to clinch.
Cockenschtuff misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Cockenschtuff has Holyshit pressed against the cage, preventing Holyshit from circling away and getting back to striking at range. Cockenschtuff connects with a nasty looking knee right to Holyshit's face.
A head punch on the inside from Cockenschtuff fails to land. Cockenschtuff scores with an uppercut up the middle. Cockenschtuff tries to stall but Holyshit uses the opportunity to gain a better position.
Cockenschtuff misses with a hook to the ribs.
A quick uppercut on the inside from Holyshit. Holyshit is trying to slow down the pace of the fight but Cockenschtuff is keeping busy. Cockenschtuff is pressed up against the cage. Holyshit has hold of a leg and is looking to drag Cockenschtuff down to the mat. Cockenschtuff avoids the attempt though and has circled away. We're back to striking at a distance. Cockenschtuff closes the distance and clinches. Cockenschtuff throws a knee to the head but misses.
That's two minutes gone in the round. Cockenschtuff missing with knees to the body.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here. Holyshit tries to stall but Cockenschtuff uses the opportunity to gain a better position.
Holyshit breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat. Cockenschtuff tries to clinch but Holyshit is having none of it. Holyshit throws a wild body kick that Cockenschtuff sees coming a mile off. Holyshit takes a shot right to the liver - Bas would have been proud of that punch. Both fighters are breathing heavily. Cockenschtuff with a nice cross. Cockenschtuff thows a leg kick but Holyshit checks it letting Holyshit counter with a right hand. Holyshit fakes a head shot and lands one to the body. Cockenschtuff thumps Holyshit with a low kick. Cockenschtuff comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range. Cockenschtuff pulls out of a head kick attempt.
That's three minutes gone in the round. Cockenschtuff clinches. Cockenschtuff lands with a short shot to the head. Cockenschtuff struggles to land a body shot inside as Holyshit controls his hands.
Cockenschtuff has a couple of punches blocked by Holyshit.
Cockenschtuff scores with a knee to the head.
Cockenschtuff misses with a body punch.
Cockenschtuff tries to work over Holyshit's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target. Holyshit has dropped down and is looking to force the takedown but it's defended by Cockenschtuff after a bit of a struggle. Cockenschtuff lands an uppercut. Cockenschtuff tries to land a knee to the head but Holyshit blocks with his arms.
Cockenschtuff lands a nice knee to the body. Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show! Cockenschtuff with an attempt at a knee that misses.
Cockenschtuff trying to land knees to the body.
That's four minutes gone in the round. Cockenschtuff tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage. Cockenschtuff tries to land a knee to the head but Holyshit blocks with his arms.
Cockenschtuff misses with a knee strike.
Holyshit blocking some punches.
A short right from Cockenschtuff. Holyshit prevents a body shot from Cockenschtuff. Holyshit is working for a takedown up against the cage. He can't get it on this occasion though. That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Evander Holyshit. That's going to take a lot out of him. Cockenschtuff tries a body shot but Holyshit blocks it.
Holyshit blocks an elbow strike. Holyshit prevents a body shot from Cockenschtuff. Cockenschtuff looking to throw knees to the head but Holyshit is blocking nicely.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action! Cockenschtuff misses with a hook from the clinch. Cockenschtuff has been the more effective fighter overall so far. Holyshit dodges an elbow strike from Cockenschtuff.
Cockenschtuff lands a nice shot to the body. A right handed body shot lands from Cockenschtuff.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Lester Cockenschtuff really dominated that round. The cut man is working on Evander Holyshit's cut. That's the end of the interval. I'm sure that seemed a lot quicker than a minute for our two fighters! Back to the action.
Cockenschtuff scores with a hook to the body. Holyshit takes a step back and tries to catch his breath. Holyshit has his head snapped back a nice jab. A little nod from Holyshit there as he acknowledges the shot. Cockenschtuff swings away with a leg kick that misses. A looping hook to the body misses from Holyshit. Cockenschtuff does a little dance to reset his feet. Cockenschtuff takes a swing at Holyshit's ribcage but misses. Holyshit swats away the attempt to clinch by Cockenschtuff. A jab from Cockenschtuff finds it's way through Holyshit's defenses. Holyshit slips under a jab from Cockenschtuff. A good leg kick by Cockenschtuff. This has been an exciting period of action! Cockenschtuff connects with a leg kick. He turned his hip over nicely there. It's got to the stage where if one of these guys blows hard enough, the other might fall over.
That's one minute gone in the round. Cockenschtuff throws a low kick but his opponent is out of range.
Holyshit misses with a body kick. Holyshit throws a poor cross that misses
and Cockenschtuff counters with a good right hand that lands right on the jaw. Holyshit moves his head to the side to avoid a jab but walks straight into a cross. Cockenschtuff throws a low kick but Holyshit moves out of range easily. Holyshit throws a hook to the side of Cockenschtuff's head but Cockenschtuff sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully. Holyshit is hobbling a little on that front leg after taking quite a few leg kicks so far in this fight. Holyshit keeping a good distance there, avoiding the body shot.
Holyshit throws a hook but Cockenschtuff blocks it. The fight stays on the outside here - Cockenschtuff looks like he's thinking about clinching though. Cockenschtuff takes the fight into the clinch.
That's two minutes gone in the round. Holyshit is looking to take this one to the mat. Holyshit looks like he'd prefer to be striking at range right now. Cockenschtuff with a knee to the head.
Cockenschtuff lands a hook to the side of the head. The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so! Cockenschtuff controlling the action here for a moment.
Holyshit breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat. Cockenschtuff is looking to clinch. Cockenschtuff throws a low kick but his opponent is out of range.
Cockenschtuff misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
That's three minutes gone in the round. Cockenschtuff rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Holyshit moves out of range and avoids them all easily. Cockenschtuff throws a mid kick that lands with a slap. Cockenschtuff blocks a low kick nicely. Holyshit goes for a spinning back kick but it misses. Holyshit misses with a body shot. Nice footwork from Cockenschtuff.
Holyshit connects with a right hand. Cockenschtuff shakes it off. Cockenschtuff instigates a clinch. The two fighters are working to gain dominance in the clinch. Cockenschtuff connects with a knee to the head.
Holyshit prevents a body shot from Cockenschtuff. Holyshit is trying to work out of this bad position, with his back against the cage.
That's four minutes gone in the round. This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff! Cockenschtuff lands a good knee to the midsection. Holyshit won't want to take too many of those. Cockenschtuff stays in close to his opponent and throws a right hand to the body. Holyshit wants a takedown.
Cockenschtuff is struggling to control the position. Holyshit is looking for a takedown up against the cage. Cockenschtuff gets underhooks though and prevents the takedown attempt. That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Evander Holyshit. That's going to take a lot out of him. Holyshit is trying to slow down the pace in the clinch, to catch his breath. Cockenschtuff lands a damaging elbow. Cockenschtuff with an attempt at a knee that misses.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action! Cockenschtuff misses with a body punch.
Cockenschtuff has a couple of punches blocked by Holyshit.
Cockenschtuff fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Kneeeeees! The crowd are calling for knees to the body. Cockenschtuff obliges. And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Lester Cockenschtuff dominated that fourth round. The cut man is working on Evander Holyshit's cut. The corners get their ten second warning. Both fighters stand from their stools and stare eachother down, ready to get back to the action. This is the final round!
Cockenschtuff with a nice looking leg kick. You could hear that one land in a back row.
Cockenschtuff tries to clinch but Holyshit is having none of it. Lester Cockenschtuff seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout. Holyshit takes a swing at Cockenschtuff's ribcage but misses. Cockenschtuff tries to clinch but is not successful on this occasion. Holyshit swings for the body but Cockenschtuff moves out of range.
Holyshit slips under a jab from Cockenschtuff. Cockenschtuff tries to clinch there but Holyshit circles away.
Cockenschtuff is looking to clinch but Holyshit is avoiding it.
Cockenschtuff connects with a crisp jab. Holyshit circles away from the clinch attempt.
Cockenschtuff lands with a shot to the body.
That's one minute gone in the round. Holyshit explodes with a nice body kick and back out of range. Nice work. Cockenschtuff lands with a cross to side of his opponent's head. Holyshit shoots in for a takedown. He's persisting with it as Cockenschtuff sprawls well. Cockenschtuff wins this battle and keeps the fight standing. Holyshit gets slowly back to his feet. Cockenschtuff is looking to clinch. Cockenschtuff uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Holyshit. Cockenschtuff tries to close the distance and clinch up against the cage but Holyshit paws at him with a jab and circles away. Cockenschtuff chopped to the floor by a nice leg kick but he springs right back up before Holyshit can pounce on him.
That's two minutes gone in the round. Holyshit pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Cockenschtuff tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in the close the distance. Holyshit manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat. Cockenschtuff looking to take his opponent's legs away with the low kicks.
Cockenschtuff getting the better of the striking in that exchange. We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out! A looping hook to the body misses from Cockenschtuff. Holyshit does a little dance to reset his feet. Cockenschtuff clinches. Cockenschtuff misses with a knee strike.
Holyshit lands a body shot in the clinch.
Holyshit goes for a takedown in the clinch but Cockenschtuff prevents it.
Cockenschtuff misses the knee to the body. Nice hip positioning from Holyshit.
Holyshit avoids the elbow strike from Cockenschtuff, against the cage.
That's three minutes gone in the round. Holyshit makes some space for himself and lands an uppercut. Holyshit doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Cockenschtuff tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Holyshit's elbow. Cockenschtuff landing knees to the head.
Cockenschtuff lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage. A short right from Cockenschtuff on the inside. Cockenschtuff trying to land knees to the body.
Holyshit lands a body shot in the clinch.
Cockenschtuff misses with a punch to the body.
Cockenschtuff with the Thai clinch. He's looking to land a big knee but he's not managed it this time.
Cockenschtuff has a couple of punches blocked by Holyshit.
Cockenschtuff tries a body shot but Holyshit blocks it.
Holyshit on the defensive, avoiding the knees to the body.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff! Cockenschtuff misses with a hook from the clinch.
That's four minutes gone in the round. Cockenschtuff tries a knee to the head but he's missed.
Cockenschtuff is wobbling all over the place through exhaustion. Will he make it to the final bell? Cockenschtuff is trying to wear down his opponent with knees to the body. Holyshit lands on the inside with an uppercut. Holyshit blocks a body shot from Cockenschtuff. Cockenschtuff misses with some punches.
Cockenschtuff creates a bit of distance and throws an elbow that only just misses. Holyshit breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat. Holyshit moves out of range as Cockenschtuff strikes. Cockenschtuff takes a body punch that cleary hurt but he's trying not to show any weakness. Cockenschtuff has his head snapped back a nice jab. A little nod from Cockenschtuff there as he acknowledges the shot. The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action! Cockenschtuff tries to clinch there but Holyshit circles away.
Evander Holyshit has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here! Cockenschtuff wants to clinch.
And that's the end of the fight! Lester Cockenschtuff comfortably won the final round on my scorecard. I've got Cockenschtuff winning every round here. Surely the decision will go his way and he'll pick up a well deserved decision victory. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.
Ladies and gentlemen, after 5 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision. Judge Columbo Gatti scores the fight 45:50 Judge Anthony Taglia scores the fight 45:50 Judge Dean Styles scores the fight 45:50
In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Lester Cockenschtuff! Lester Cockenschtuff is the new heavyweight champion! After winning the bout, Lester Cockenschtuff thanked all his fans and promised he'd do even better in his next fight. The crowd seemed to love his humility.
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S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
100% |
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