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PBP Commentary |
Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between my Penis (ranked 4824 p4p, 0 weight class) and Dan Heston (ranked 6964 p4p, 0 weight class). The crowd giving both fighters a great reception on their way into the arena. That's good to see.
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| 190 cm
25
212 lbs
1 - 1 - 0 |
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195 cm
18
215 lbs
0 - 1 - 0 |
Good takedowns
Excellent boxer
Good chin |
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BJJ White Belt
Excellent boxer
Heavy handed |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the light heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of
1 - 1 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, my Penis!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of
0 - 1 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Dan Heston!
The judges for this bout are Matti Vanhoillinen, Tarja Halkonen and Anni Minnemäki.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Heston slips a jab from Penis.
And an attempted straight right on the counter from Heston! But no joy.
my Penis seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Penis misses the body punch
and Penis takes a counter punch right on the button for his troubles.
Penis throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Heston avoids the body shot from Penis.
Penis rushes in with a sloppy looking punch
and Penis takes a counter punch right on the button for his troubles.
Penis throws a right hand that Heston ducks under and follows up with a left that Heston also avoids with ease.
Penis lands with a cross.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Sloppy strikes from Penis. Those never looked like landing.
It seemed like Heston was going to counter with the hook but didn't fully commit to it.
Heston ducks down and throws a hook to the body.
Heston swings and misses with a hook to the body.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Penis misses with a body shot.
A little jabbing left from Heston on the counter but it doesn't find it's target.
Penis throws a jab but it's blocked by Heston.
Penis slips a straight right by Heston.
It looked like Penis wanted to counter with a hook but didn't fully commit.
Heston has done a lot of speed work in the buildup to this fight.
Penis swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Heston takes a swing at Penis's ribcage but misses.
Heston scores with a body shot.
A left lands for Heston.
Penis lands with a right hand.
Heston jabs Penis right on the nose. Penis blinks but takes it well.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
Penis ducks right into an uppercut from Heston.
Heston scores with a jab.
A lazy left from Heston finds it's target.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Penis throws a nice looking combination but Heston bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Heston lands a beauty of a right hand that gets the crowd cheering.
Penis misses with a combination
and Heston counters with a left and a right that stings Penis.
Heston jabs. That one connects to the head of his opponent.
Penis takes a swing at Heston's ribcage but misses.
Penis looks to be in better condition than last time we saw him fight. Obviously he's been working hard on his cardio.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
Heston misses with a straight right.
Heston paws at his opponent with the jab and then lunges in with a straight, right on the button.
Heston throws a wild hook but Penis just manages to duck under it and - ooooh! Heston gets nailed by a brutal uppercut which crumples him back against the cage! The referee jumps in - Penis raises his hands in celebration and walks away!
Ladies and gentlemen, after 3:19 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). my Penis!
Post fight, my Penis stared into the camera and said 'Bomb the caliphate'.
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| S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
46% |
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