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 Did you dudes see the poster? Is that some homo-erotic business or what? Fifty Shades of Cage. Even has the BDSM leather thing going on. Anyhow, word is that it is title fight time and that same word says that it is between Hooker and Brown for the openweight championship. That's some exciting business and with plenty of other talent to back it up the MMA Grand in Vegas is the place for you North American types to be spending your evening. There is gambling on offer and you know my predictions are rock solid. Sometimes. Maybe.
"The Big Dog" Harrison Duke vs. Kaban Demidov
Heavyweight
Check out "The Big Dog" Duke. I reckon Julian Assange is pulling a swift one and is getting some MMA experience in for when the Yanks pull an extraordinary rendition operation on him from Sweden. The resemblence is uncanny. Both of these boys have big skills, "The Big Dog" is well varied and plenty capable but Demidov is a striking specialist and a world champion kickboxer so there will be massive sparks flying across the arena, much to the pleasure of the headkick fetishists like myself. Despite being an old man Demidov is in great shape and his extra height, mixed with his muay Thai, makes him very formidable both up close and at a distance. Both of these men have struggled for form of late and Demidov will need an early KO if he wants to escape a relatively straight forward submission at the hands of Duke who has shown he has the capability. With Duke going the distance his last two fights, despite losing, I think he has what it take to win a submission tonight.
David "Green Beast" Kappa vs. "Sexmachine" Earth Quake
Heavyweight
To keep the quality high we have "Green Beast" Kappa and "Sexmachine" Quake ready to throw down. Both men have been around the block against top quality opponents and with their well rounded abilities matched by giant physiques this is a classic for all MMA fans. Both men are coming into this fight off the back of some solid wins, Quake in particular has dominated some of HWP's greatest and most gloried veterans so I am expecting big things from this fight. Kappa has won a submission victory in the past but I am not expecting him to go for one here tonight, this is standup territory ladies and gentlemen! Who is going to win is the question on everybody's lips and I for one am having trouble deciding. It seems to me that Quake has the better history of pulling off outrageous knock outs over massive opposition so I am going to tip him to take the KO win though to be honest I wouldn't be surprised to see this fight go the distance.
Hulk "original banana hammock" Hogan vs. Nikac Komitata
Heavyweight. Co-Main Event!
The original, the "Banana Hammock", the Olympic standard wrestler they call Hogan is back in the cage once more. His opponent, the plucky Komitata who is showing tremendous heart in stepping up to take on a living legend. Komitata has a solid foot of extra height on Hogan and is more or less qualified to take him on from a standing perspective, especially with that height added into the mix, but Hogan had the potential to put this one on the floor and to pound it out. Both men are BJJ purple belts so it would end up being against Komitata's best interests in a submission battle but with Hogan having never notched one up in his career he may well find himself able to defend against ground and pound fairly effectively. This is another tough fight to call, but despite Komitata's recent fantastic form I am going to go with the tried and proven "Banana Hammock" formula.
Joseph "Fighting Joe" Hooker vs. Leroy Brown
Super Heavyweight. Main Event TITLE FIGHT!
Now this is different! Instead of the usual giants of MMA that you've seen a thousand times before, we have two rookies, the current champ "Fighting Joe" Hooker and Brown ready to duke it out for the SHW title. I am expecting an all standup affair as Hooker has the grappling to work the ground but no wrestling to get it down and Brown has the wrestling to get it down but no grappling. Where the two men have common ground is in the striking department. With that said, Hooker is 50cm taller than the pint sized samurai Brown who weighs in at a whopping 40lbs heavier. That's 300lbs at 150cm. Someone test for roids! Both men are capable of finishing fights early though to be fair, I wouldn't expect this fight to end up in Hooker's preferred submission territory and I think with Brown punching his knees and head butting his cock this one will end up with a KO and a new champ.
There you have it boys and girls, all of the HWP weekend action courtesy of your most favourite K-Rad in the whole wide world. Take it easy, enjoy the fights and I'll see you all next week!
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