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 HWP304: Thai v Komitata! PREVIEW
Guess who is late? Me! Suck it up ladies and be grateful I ran out of kleenex and therefore took my hand off my wang long enough to write this preview. Am I not benevolent? Is that even the right word? Whether it is or it isn't, it is time for HWP304: Thai vs. Komitata and it's going to be a cracker. The bee's knees, the duck's nuts and the dog's bollocks. Just like a BBQ I had in Korean once really.
Kaban Demidov vs. "Affliction Killer" Ruiner Barnett
The giant men get it started with Demidov taking on “Affliction Killer” Barnett, the latter of whom took some time off losing fights to Afro Samurai in order to lose a fight against Munson and most recently turn it all around with a win over Cong. Coming into this fight Barnett will be quite confident but it certainly won't be all one-way traffic as champion kickboxer Demidov will be looking to knock his head clean off his shoulders with some brutal high kicks. This shouldn't worry Barnett too much though as he is a fine striker himself and with Demidov having a wrestling hole in his game wide enough to back a truck full of Roseanne Barrs through I would expect Barnett to put his black belt to use and score a submission win tonight.
"The Diabelli Variation" Wolfgang Van Beethoven vs. Carter Beauford
It's not too often when you get a fighter in HWPs main card with more losses than wins but Beauford, despite a perpetual habit of losing 3 in a row, is so good at being knocked out that the fans love him for his sleeping patterns. Beethoven for his part has all but one win via knock out so he will be more than happy to give the fans what they want and as long as his slightly superior wrestling lives up to its hype I expect him to use his 23cm height advantage and be the 24th person to put Beauford to sleep as Beauford moves onto his first ever 4-in-a-row losing streak!
"Blade" Alex Rios vs. "nutshot i quit" Cro Copout
Co-Main Event!
The co-main event features theinfamous “I Quit” Copout, a man who has mastered the art of using the testes as a shield against knee strikes. His opponent, “Blade” Rios, is a well rounded striker and it will be interesting to see whether he is able to hammer away at Copout's sack until the latter submits. Copout is the giant in this matchup, towering 28cm over his opponent, effectively putting his scrotum at “Blade's” eye level to headbutts and potentially bites to the coinpurse are not to be ruled out. Both fighters have looked good of late so it will be a battle of in-form titans which I am going to have to give to Copout as his record of losses via decision is a good indicator to me of his chin strength whereas Rios has all 3 of his losses via KO so I think Copout should be able to turn out his lights.
"Boran" Muay Thai vs. Nikac Komitata
Main Event!
On the topic of in-form fighters, both “Boran” Thai and Komitata have been looking good overall of late and this main event promises to be a real ripsnorter. Thai, as you'd expect, has a brutal kicking game but so does Komitata who stands 30cm taller making it that much easier to put a foot in “Boran's” face. The two men are very well matched in the striking department so this height difference may well be a major factor in this fight as it will definitely affect Thai's gameplan going into this battle. This is a super tough fight to predict but I think the extra accuracy and angles afford to Komitata is going to be decisive and I am going to tip him to win the decision in this fight.
There you have it boys and girls, the top 4 fights of the card all neat and in their place. That leaves us with just one more thing to address, that's right it is time to get out your mum's credit cards and gamble recklessly using K-Rad's Kickass Tips! As always, the number in brackets represents how confident I am that the named fighter is going to take the prize.
West vs. Nail: West (4)
Johnson vs. Irene: Irene (3)
Fulcher vs. Insano: Insano (3)
Aureus vs. Singh: Singh (4)
Boxer vs. Gump: Boxer (4)
Tonying vs. Munson: Tonying (6)
Demidov vs. Barnett: Barnett (6)
Beethoven vs. Beauford: Beauford (7)
Rios vs. Copout: Copout (4)
Thai vs. Komitata: Komitata (2)
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