PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a welterweight MMA rules bout between Niek Mulder (ranked 2727 p4p, 321 weight class) and William Shitlord (ranked 2122 p4p, 265 weight class). Mulder comes to the cage accompanied by Lose yourself. Buckle up people - heeeeeeeeeere we go!

Mulder
vs
Shitlord

178 cm
27
174 lbs
2 - 1 - 0

186 cm
26
177 lbs
5 - 3 - 0

Good wrestling
Basic striking
Cardio machine

BJJ Blue Belt
Excellent MT
Granite chin

Dr Zoidberg Office

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the welterweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 2 - 1 - 0, fighting out of Hilo, Niek Mulder!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 5 - 3 - 0, fighting out of Rio de Janeiro, William Shitlord!
The judges for this bout are Micheangelo Fripello, Jeff Smith and Paul Gruel.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!

Mulder drives through with a takedown into guard.
Shitlord keeping moving, preventing Mulder from controlling successfully.
Shitlord working a defensive guard here.
Mulder slows down the pace of the fight, as he sits in guard.
There's a bit of a scramble here and now Shitlord is on top in guard.

Mulder wants to sweep here but Shitlord controlling him for the moment.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Shitlord in full guard, throwing the ground and pound. No damage this time.
Mulder lands a beautiful sweep and he's now moved into his opponent's guard.

That's one minute gone in the round.
A big thud reverberates around the arena there as Mulder accidentally thumps the mat. Hopefully he's not broken his hand.
Mulder postures up in Shitlord's guard and throws a big left but Shitlord blocks it.
Shitlord looks more muscular than last time we saw him. He must have been on the weights.
Mulder landing some decent shots from guard.
Mulder trying to control the position from guard on top but Shitlord is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.
Shitlord avoiding any damage from the ground and pound.
Mulder is taking a break and basically stalling. The referee will not allow him to do that for long.
Mulder throwing elbows and punches but not connecting, as Shitlord works some decent striking defense from the bottom.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Well. There's a bit of a lull in the action here and the crowd are starting to get restless.
Mulder working from the guard for now, landing some ground and pound.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
Mulder is frustrating his opponent with some stalling tactics from top position.
Mulder scoring with some ground and pound.
Shitlord avoiding any damage from the ground and pound.
Mulder throwing strikes from guard but Shitlord blocks nicely.
Mulder trying to control the position from guard on top but Shitlord is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.
Mulder throwing shots from guard but he's hitting more mat than opponent.
Mulder postures up to throw the ground and pound strikes but they don't connect.
Mulder pressing down on his opponent's thigh, looking to pass guard. Shitlord is keeping the position for now.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Shitlord avoiding any damage from the ground and pound.
Shitlord tries to land a sweep but no joy.
Mulder postures up to throw the ground and pound strikes but they don't connect.
Mulder showing good wrestling skills to control the position.

The ref stands the fighters back up due to a lack of activity.
Mulder moves out of range of the strikes.
Shitlord slips a jab from Mulder.
Mulder looks to have improved his striking defense since last time we saw him fight.
Shitlord misses with a looping left.
William Shitlord seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.

Mulder closes the distance and after a bit of a stuggle, scores a takedown into Shitlord's guard.
Mulder throws a big elbow that misses.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
The fighters are starting to perspire pretty heavily.
Hammerfist, elbow! yells Mulder's corner. There ya go! There ya go!
Mulder working some ground and pound from guard but it's not doing any damage.
Shitlord utilising some decent striking defenses from the guard, preventing the ground and pound.
Mulder seems content to control from guard here. He's going to have to remain active though if he doesn't want to get stood back up.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Mulder throws an elbow that misses. Shitlord uses the momentum to reverse the position. He's now in Mulder's guard. Nice move by Shitlord!

Mulder is throwing his legs up, looking for submissions. Shitlord is aware though and is defending well.
Mulder managing to control the position.
Mulder not looking particularly offensive just at the moment.
The crowd thankful this round is nearly over.
Mulder lands a beautiful sweep and he's now moved into his opponent's guard.

Shitlord is working an open guard here, looking to improve his position. No doubt that will leave him open to counters but at least he's being more offensive.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Niek Mulder dominated that round.
That's the end of the interval. I'm sure that seemed a lot quicker than a minute for our two fighters! Back to the action.

Mulder slips a jab and a cross from Shitlord.
Shitlord lunges at Mulder with a hook that half lands and is half blocked by Mulder's hand.

Mulder gets tackled into the cage by Shitlord. Shitlord maintains the clinch.
Mulder jumps guard but his hands slip and he falls flat on his back. Well, he's made himself look a right mug there, as Shitlord walks away with a smile on his face. Mulder gets slowly back to his feet and shakes his head.
Mulder gets his takedown attempt stuffed easily
and Shitlord cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
Shitlord works his jab well there, keeping his opponent at a distance.
Shitlord moving in and out of range nicely, whilst landing the scoring shot.

Mulder closes the distance and gets a trip takedown into side control. Shitlord quickly recovers to half guard.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Shitlord is looking for a sweep. Mulder is wise to his cunning plan and keeps the top position.
Niek Mulder overall seems to be getting the better of the ground position in the fight so far.
Mulder controlling the pace.
Mulder lands with a punch from half guard.

Mulder wants to work for an arm triangle but Shitlord is really keeping half guard well and defending the submission attempt.
Mulder looks to score some points with some ground and pound.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Mulder wants to take a breather but Shitlord is having none of it.
Shitlord trying to control here.
Mulder landing with strikes to the body and head, softening up his opponent.
Mulder wants to lay and pray for a moment but Shitlord keeps working.
Mulder working Shitlord over with strikes.
Mulder working Shitlord over with strikes.
Mulder is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Shitlord can do to turn this around?
The referee walks around the fighters to get a better view of the action. Mulder lands a nice short elbow.
The referee calls for the fighters to work.
Mulder thumps the canvas. Not on purpose obviously - he just missed Shitlord's head.
Shitlord is refusing to be controlled, as Mulder sits in half guard.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Mulder thumps the canvas. Not on purpose obviously - he just missed Shitlord's head.
Mulder thows a wild elbow that connects with the canvas.
Shitlord blocking the ground and pound attempt from Mulder.
Mulder throwing shots but Shitlord is blocking nicely.
The two fighters exchange a few words. I couldn't hear what they were saying but maybe it's more fun if you make it up yourself. Mulder connects with a nice short shot to Shitlord's temple.
Mulder is trying to control. Shitlord wants to improve his position but can't escape this time.
Mulder is keeping good posture, landing some ground and pound.
Mulder wants to lay and pray for a moment but Shitlord keeps working.
Mulder prevents Shitlord from improving his position.
Mulder not doing much here.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Mulder throwing punches and elbows but they're not doing any damage.
Mulder with a momentary lay and pray from half guard.
Mulder thows a huge punch but Shitlord dodges it nicely.
Mulder thows a huge punch but Shitlord dodges it nicely.
Mulder seems content to maintain position for now, rather than mounting any offense.
The referee must be thinking about standing these guys back up.
Mulder is keeping good posture, landing some ground and pound.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are getting on the fighters' backs, as the pace has dropped off in the last minute or so.
Mulder missing with some ground and pound from the half guard.
Mulder sitting in half guard, looking to land shots. Shitlord defending well though.
Mulder is taking a breather. Shitlord says something to him but it's hard to make out. Perhaps he's telling him to get on with it and actually do something.
Mulder sitting in half guard, looking to land shots. Shitlord defending well though.
Shitlord has hold of Mulder's hands but Mulder slips his arm to the side and lands an elbow.
Mulder trying to control the action but Shitlord is working from the bottom.
Mulder has been looking to land a fair amount of strikes on the ground. He might be looking to soften his opponent up in order to work for a submission.
Mulder performing his best blanket impression for a moment.
The crowd thankful this round is nearly over.
Shitlord is looking to regain full guard. Not this time though.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Niek Mulder dominated that second round.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action! This is the final round!

Mulder scores with a nice takedown into half guard. Let's see what he's got on the ground.
Mulder looks towards his corner to check for any instructions. The corner give him nothing to work with, so he cracks Shitlord with a short hammerfist. I guess that's as good as any advice he could get in this position.
Mulder thows a wild elbow that connects with the canvas.
Mulder is trying to control. Shitlord wants to improve his position but can't escape this time.
Mulder sitting in half guard, looking to land shots. Shitlord defending well though.
Shitlord is refusing to be controlled, as Mulder sits in half guard.
Mulder not landing any meaningful shots this time.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
The referee calls for the fighters to work.
Mulder missing with the ground and pound from half guard.
Mulder not landing any meaningful shots this time.
Shitlord trying to control from the bottom.

That's one minute gone in the round.
The fighters are battling for position here. Shitlord manages to regain full guard. Nice work.
Mulder trying to land body shots but he keeps hitting the mat.
Mulder scoring with punches to the head and body.
Mulder throwing shots from guard but he's hitting more mat than opponent.
Mulder throwing elbows and punches but not connecting, as Shitlord works some decent striking defense from the bottom.
Mulder controls from within his opponent's guard.
Mulder has controlled the position for a good 20 seconds, which will no doubt be starting to frustrate his opponent.

The ref stands the fighters back up due to a lack of activity.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are hurling abuse towards the fighters... You can hardly blame them though because there isn't a lot going on in the fight.
Shitlord tries to clinch there but Mulder circles away.
Shitlord displaying good standup as he scores with a three punch combination.
William Shitlord is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Mulder takes a punch to the jaw and another one to the bread basket.
Mulder blocks a jab.

Mulder scores with a takedown into Shitlord's guard.
Hammerfist, elbow! yells Mulder's corner. There ya go! There ya go!
Mulder makes a bit of distance and scores with some ground and pound, still in guard.
Mulder scores with a decent looking elbow strike.
Mulder postures up and scores with a shot to the body and a follow up elbow to the head.
Mulder lands a nice shot whilst sitting in his opponent's guard.
Shitlord looking to hit a scissor sweep but Mulder is one step ahead there.
Mulder is just sitting in guard, looking to avoid any submissions.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Shitlord utilising some decent striking defenses from the guard, preventing the ground and pound.
Mulder with a flurry of punches that miss.
Mulder postures up in Shitlord's guard and throws a big left but Shitlord blocks it.
Mulder lands a couple of digs.
Mulder postures up and lands a big shot to Shitlord's brow.
Mulder passes Shitlord's left leg - he's now in half guard.
Mulder scores with a couple of good hammerfists.
Mulder scoring with strikes to the body and head.
Shitlord trying to control from the bottom.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Mulder lands with an elbow from half guard - that looked like it hurt.
Shitlord takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.
Mulder trying to pass the guard but Shitlord defending well.
Mulder throwing shots but they're hitting the canvas more than the man.
Mulder scores with a couple of good hammerfists.
Shitlord is working for an escape here. He's hooked one of Mulder's legs and he's managed to sneak out and take Mulder's back!
Shitlord controlling well, preventing Mulder from escaping the position.
Shitlord throwing lazy shots from the back mount that aren't doing any damage.
Mulder tries to escape the position - he's now mounted. Is that better or worse? Hard to tell!
William Shitlord has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Niek Mulder is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
Mulder regains half guard.

And that's the end of the fight!
Niek Mulder showed his dominance in that final round.
Well I reckon that's a shut out for Mulder, winning every round. Will the judges agree? They are the ones who matter, even if they are often depressingly incompetent. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Micheangelo Fripello scores the fight 30:27
Judge Jeff Smith scores the fight 30:27
Judge Paul Gruel scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Niek Mulder!
A relieved looking Niek Mulder thanked the fans for their support and gave the usual line about them being amazing. They seemed to believe that he actually meant it.