PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between Turd Ferg (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Jacob Keats (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Keats has chosen Ludacris- Undisputed (ft. Floyd "Money" Mayweather) as his entrance music. Rumors backstage are that the fighters have been paid to keep it standing but we know that would never happen in MMA!

Ferg
vs
Keats

190 cm
22
210 lbs
2 - 0 - 0

188 cm
18
205 lbs
1 - 0 - 0

BJJ Blue Belt
Brawler
Cuts easily

BJJ Blue Belt
Basic striking
Determined

Valhalla War Gear

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the light heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 2 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Turd Ferg!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 1 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Jacob Keats!
The judges for this bout are Ben Zyskovitsi, Roosa Järviläinen and Matti Vanhoillinen.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Keats fails with the takedown.
Turd Ferg seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Ferg misses with the combination.
Keats tries to shoot in for a takedown. He's got hold of a leg but Ferg swivels and escapes.
Ferg lands three nice shots there - that looked like it hurt!

It looks like Jacob Keats has been cut.

Keats closes the distance, clinches up and gets a nice trip takedown into side control. Very smooth.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Ferg is working hard to escape and get back to his feet. After a battle for position, Keats asserts his dominance and retains side control.

Keats decides to stand back up.
Ferg throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
No luck for Ferg with that takedown attempt.

Keats scores a takedown into full mount!

Ferg bucks Keats off and manages to get back to his feet!
Keats shoots in for a takedown but Ferg shows good takedown defense.
Turd Ferg has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Jacob Keats.
Keats looks gassed!
Keats with a lazy takedown attempt
and Ferg connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
Ferg looks to land a combination but Keats avoids it well.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Ferg connects with a lovely jab that went straight through the gap between Keats's hands.

Ferg shoots in and bounces Keats off the cage to secure the takedown into guard.
Ferg lands a couple of digs.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.

Keats looking for submissions from the bottom here. Moving his hips around, possibly looking for an armbar.

Keats is looking for a triangle but Ferg pushes his legs off easily.
Keats looking to sweep here. No luck so far.

Keats has a loose triangle. He'll be looking to tighten that up but Ferg can see exactly what he's planning and manages to posture up and free himself.
Ferg has to be careful here, sitting in the guard of a superior BJJ player.

That's two minutes gone in the round.

Ferg stands up from guard. Let's bang!
Keats slips a jab and a cross from Ferg.
Keats with a poor takedown
and Ferg counters with a left and a right that stings Keats.
Nice sprawl there from Keats as Ferg shoots in.
Keats fails miserably with a takedown attempt.
Ferg rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Keats moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Keats misses with a takedown attempt

and Ferg counters with a single leg into guard. Keats didn't expect that.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.

Keats escapes his hips to the side and looks to be working for an armbar. Ferg gives him a little smile and shakes his head. No chance.
Ferg tries to stand but Keats is controlling from the bottom.

Keats isolates an arm and boxes in a triangle. Ferg stacks Keats on his neck as he steps over and passes to the side. He's now in a much more dominant position where he can look to do some serious damage. Nice move by Ferg!

That's three minutes gone in the round.

Ferg has had enough of the ground for now and decides to stand.
Ferg throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Keats keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Ferg.

Excellent takedown into side control there by Keats.
Ferg struggling a bit here.
Ferg pushes Keats away and creates a bit of space to escape. He's almost out here... but no, Keats gets a good hold of his legs and remains firmly in side control.
Keats trying to control the position but Ferg is working away.

Keats is looking to finish here, going for an Americana. Ferg knows the correct defense though, so he's OK.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Ferg avoids any damage from the ground and pound of Keats.

Keats looking for an arm triangle but it's way too loose to do anything.
Keats throwing shots but missing, from side control.
Ferg misses with an elbow from the bottom.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.

Well, the referee has seen enough. Neither fighter is active enough on the ground so he's stood them back up.
Ferg looks to land a combination but Keats avoids it well.
Ferg connects with a lovely right hand, straight down the pipe.
Good standup being displayed there by Ferg as he connects with a hook.
Keats shoots and misses
and Ferg counters with a left and a right that stings Keats.
Ferg lands a jab-cross combination.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Turd Ferg dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Jacob Keats's cut.
That's the end of the interval. I'm sure that seemed a lot quicker than a minute for our two fighters! Back to the action.

Keats shoots in with a takedown attempt and he has Ferg pinned against the cage. Ferg gets the underhooks and manages to circle away.
Keats fails with a rather predictable takedown attempt.

Ferg closes the distance and clinches up, looking for a takedown. He shifts his weight and gets a nice trip into half guard.
Ferg looks towards his corner to check for any instructions. The corner give him nothing to work with, so he cracks Keats with a short hammerfist. I guess that's as good as any advice he could get in this position.

Ferg decides he's had enough of the ground and stands up.
Ferg fails to land with a series of punches.
Keats shoots and misses
and Ferg counters with a left and a right that stings Keats.
Turd Ferg has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Jacob Keats.
Nice sprawl there from Ferg as Keats shoots in.
Ferg fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
Ferg throws a series of punches but Keats avoids them all with ease.
Both fighters are absolutely exhausted here.

Keats darts in and lands a nice takedown into half guard.

Keats is looking for a kimura here.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Ferg is looking for a sweep. Keats is wise to his cunning plan and keeps the top position.
Ferg tries to kick Keats off but Keats keeps his base steady and stays in half guard.
Both fighters really going for it on the ground here!
Keats blocks the strikes from Ferg.

Keats is trying to work for a kimura. He's got his hands clasped together - this could be trouble! No, Ferg has managed to free his arm - good work.
Keats thows a huge punch but Ferg dodges it nicely.
Ferg is looking to escape.

Ferg is defending against the submission attempts here by Keats.

Neither fighter is doing enough for the referee's liking and he's decided to stand them back up.
Ferg with a poor takedown

and Keats decides to take the opportunity to score a takedown. He's landed in Ferg's guard.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Ferg wants to improve his position but instead Keats has moved into half guard.
Ferg is on the bottom, trying to hold on to half guard. He's throwing a few small shots here, to keep his opponent honest.

Keats is thinking about going for an arm triangle but he can't free his leg.

Ferg pushes Keats off and gets back to his feet.
Ferg misses with a jab, cross combination.

Keats scores with a nice takedown into half guard. Let's see what he's got on the ground.

Keats is sneakily working for an arm triangle but Ferg sees it coming and defends easily.
Ferg is trying to stand.

Keats is trying to work for a kimura but Ferg is defending well.
Ferg looks like he's trying to stand up.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Keats lands with a punch from half guard.
Ferg tries to kick Keats off but Keats keeps his base steady and stays in half guard.

Keats is trying to work for a kimura. He's got his hands clasped together - this could be trouble! No, Ferg has managed to free his arm - good work.

Neither fighter is doing enough for the referee's liking and he's decided to stand them back up.
Keats gets his takedown attempt stuffed easily

and Ferg counters with a nice double leg into half guard.
It looks like Ferg is going to stand back up.

Keats looking to work for a kimura from the bottom.
Keats wants to control but Ferg is keeping busy and won't allow it.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Keats is trying to get back to full guard.
Keats wants to control but Ferg is keeping busy.
Ferg slips a nice elbow through Keats's hands, connecting with Keats's forehead.

Ferg decides he's had enough of the ground and stands up.
Keats with a poor takedown

and Ferg counters with a driving takedown into guard. Nice work there by Ferg.
This has been an exciting period of action!

Keats manages to escape and get back to his feet.
Wow, both these guys are really going for it!
Ferg throws a left and a right that both miss

and Keats counters with a nice double leg into guard.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.

Ferg pushes Keats off and scrambles back to his feet.
No joy there for Ferg, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
Keats shoots in with a takedown attempt and he has Ferg pinned against the cage. Ferg gets the underhooks and manages to circle away.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Turd Ferg dominated that second round.
The cut man is working on Jacob Keats's cut.
The referee calls time. The cornermen exit stage left and we're back to business. Let's hear some noise people - this is the final round!

Ferg lets the fists fly and connects with a left straight followed by a right hook.
Keats gets his takedown attempt stuffed easily
and Ferg counters with a one-two to the body.
Keats shoots and misses

and Ferg counters with a single leg into guard. Keats didn't expect that.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
Ferg trying to control the position from guard on top but Keats is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.

Keats looking for submissions off his back, moving his hips, looking for an opening.
Ferg distracts Keats with his right hand and drops a big elbow with his other arm.

Keats had isolated an arm as going for an omaplata. Ferg is defending the submission well but is in a very vulnerable position. Keats Is leaning forward trying to finish the omaplata but decides to abandon it, and take Ferg's back instead.
Ferg is trying to stand back up.
Both fighters are breathing heavily.

Keats is staying calm and holding on to the back position, whilst working on a rear naked choke. Ferg is defending well though. Keats let's go of the attempt for now.

That's one minute gone in the round.

Ferg is staying cool under pressure, defending well against the rear naked choke attempt from his opponent.

Ferg manages to stand up with Keats still on his back. Eventually Keats drops to his feet and we're back in the standing position.
Ferg throws a nice looking combination but Keats bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Horrible takedown by Keats or perhaps it was just good defense by Ferg which made him look bad.
Turd Ferg has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Jacob Keats.
Ferg throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are getting on the fighters' backs, as the pace has dropped off in the last minute or so.
Keats with a poor takedown
enabling Ferg to counter with a crisp jab.
Ferg changes levels and looks for a double leg takedown. Keats tries to avoid it but Ferg manages to keep hold of a leg and drag Keats to the ground. Keats escapes though and pops straight back up to his feet.
Ferg throws a two punch combo that lands nicely.
Ferg looks to land a combination but Keats avoids it well.
Ferg throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Keats.
Ferg tries to clinch but Keats moves away

and Keats counters with a takedown into side control.
Keats trying to control the action but Ferg is working from the bottom.
Ferg struggling a bit here.

Keats tries for a kimura. Not really close to a finish though.

Keats tries for an arm triangle. That looks pretty tight to me. Is this one over!?! Possibly, maybe, no Keats has let go of the choke. Obviously it wasn't as tight as we thought!

That's three minutes gone in the round.

Keats swings around for an armbar but Ferg sees it coming a mile off and turns beautifully into Keats's guard.
Ferg passes Keats's left leg - he's now in half guard.

Keats actively working from the bottom here.

Keats is looking to sinch up a gullotine here but Ferg pulls his head out easily.
Keats is trying to defend against the ground and pound but Ferg scores with a couple of nice shots.

Keats is looking to sinch up a gullotine here but Ferg pulls his head out easily.

Keats actively working from the bottom here.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
A lull in the action here being met with boos from the crowd.
The two fighters exchange a few words. I couldn't hear what they were saying but maybe it's more fun if you make it up yourself. Ferg connects with a nice short shot to Keats's temple.
Ferg landing with strikes to the body and head, softening up his opponent.

Keats actively working from the bottom here.

Well, the referee has seen enough. Neither fighter is active enough on the ground so he's stood them back up.
Ferg connects with a slap. Keep your fist closed son.
Turd Ferg is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
Ferg has a takedown stuffed.

Ferg clinches up with Keats and pushes him back against the cage.
Keats wants a takedown but no success here.
Ferg looking for a takedown.

Keats has double underhooks and is working for a body lock takedown. He's got it. The fighters land in half guard but Ferg regains guard immediately.

And that's the end of the fight!
Turd Ferg showed his dominance in that final round.
Well Ferg has outscored his opponent in every aspect of the fight today. Only a scarily incompetent judge or two will keep him from a well deserved win... Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Ben Zyskovitsi scores the fight 30:27
Judge Roosa Järviläinen scores the fight 30:27
Judge Matti Vanhoillinen scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Turd Ferg!