PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between CrankY PantZ (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Retard Strong (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). PantZ's ring entrance music is that housewives' favourite, Beware!. Retard Strong has the power to score a knockout today if he connects clean with CrankY PantZ's chin.

PantZ
vs
Strong

190 cm
25
270 lbs
8 - 5 - 0

210 cm
25
284 lbs
9 - 4 - 0

BJJ Purple Belt
Solid Muay Thai
Very strong

BJJ Blue Belt
Brawler
Granite chin

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 8 - 5 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, CrankY PantZ!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 9 - 4 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Retard Strong!
The judges for this bout are Daniel Franklin, Cecil Peabody and Alan Glass.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!

Strong tries to keep at a distance but PantZ has taken the fight into the clinch.
PantZ has a body lock and is looking for a takedown. Strong is bouncing around trying to prevent the takedown and somehow he has indeed managed to stay on his feet.
Strong has hold of a leg and is looking for a trip takedown. PantZ avoids it nicely though and we remain in the clinch.
PantZ can't get the takedown.
PantZ can't get the takedown.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for CrankY PantZ. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Strong has had enough of the clinch and is looking to separate.

Strong breaks from the clinch.

PantZ shoots in looking for a single leg takedown. Strong is trying to defend but PantZ finishes it well and ends up in half guard. Let's see if he can advance position further.

PantZ is sneakily working for an arm triangle but Strong sees it coming and defends easily.
Strong slips a foot under and gets full guard. Nice work.
Strong lands a beautiful switch and he's in full mount! That could spell trouble for PantZ!
Strong throwing strikes here but PantZ is writhing around nicely and avoiding any serious damage.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Strong pausing momentarily but resumes with a couple of decent strikes that do a bit of damage.
Strong dominating with strikes here.
Strong landing punches.
Strong drops a big elbow. That's hurt PantZ! More shots from Strong and the ref steps in! The fight is over!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:39 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Retard Strong!