PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between Horny Helmet (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Chuck Lidell (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). The key to victory for Horny Helmet has got to be keeping the fight on the feet.

Helmet
vs
Lidell

193 cm
25
204 lbs
3 - 2 - 0

225 cm
25
205 lbs
0 - 5 - 0

BJJ White Belt
Great elbows
Very strong

Good wrestler
Brawler
Powerful

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the light heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 3 - 2 - 0, fighting out of New York, Horny Helmet!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 0 - 5 - 0, fighting out of New York, Chuck Lidell!
The judges for this bout are Chad Campbell, Columbo Gatti and Lou da Vinci.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
A combination from Helmet does no damage.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
Helmet throws a right hand that Lidell ducks under and follows up with a left that Lidell also avoids with ease.
Helmet pushes forward with a 1-2 combination that forces Lidell back to the ropes. Helmet follows up with a solid lead hook to the liver.

It looks like Chuck Lidell has been cut.
Helmet rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Lidell moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
A head kick misses from Lidell.
Lidell looks gassed!
Helmet misses with a jab, cross combination.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Helmet lands with a nice combination. Lidell backs away looking to recover.
Helmet throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Lidell.
Helmet misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Lidell showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Helmet.
Lidell dodges the punch combination from Helmet.
Helmet throws a right and a left that both miss.
Lidell slips a jab and a cross from Helmet.
Wow, both these guys are really going for it!
Lidell tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Helmet will need to tighten up his combinations if he doesn't want to gas himself out, swinging at thin air.
Lidell throws a head kick but Helmet moves out of range.
Helmet misses with a few strikes there.
Helmet misses with a series of wild punches.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Helmet throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Lidell is a painfully thin specimen of a man. You do wonder whether a good body kick would snap him clean in two.
Lidell slips a jab and a cross from Helmet.
Helmet throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Helmet throws a nice looking combination but Lidell bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
Lidell misses with a head kick.
Lidell misses with a head kick.
Lidell pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Helmet avoids the head kick by Lidell.
Helmet rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Lidell moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Helmet looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Helmet misses with a two punch combination.
Helmet throws a series of punches but Lidell avoids them all with ease.
Helmet avoids the head kick by Lidell.
Helmet throws a right and a left that Lidell avoids nicely.
A head kick misses from Lidell.
Lidell misses with a head kick.
Lidell pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Helmet will need to tighten up his combinations if he doesn't want to gas himself out, swinging at thin air.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
A few boos can be heard. I'm sure they will multiply if the fighters don't pick up the pace.
Helmet fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
A combination from Helmet does no damage.
Helmet misses with a wild combination.
A head kick misses from Lidell.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Helmet misses with a two punch combination.
No joy there for Helmet, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
Helmet looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Lidell pulls out of a head kick attempt.
A head kick misses from Lidell.
Lidell tries a head kick but it misses.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
A head kick misses from Lidell.
Lidell misses with a head kick.
Helmet misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Helmet blocks a head kick by Lidell.
Helmet looks to land a combination but Lidell avoids it well.
Helmet misses with a two punch combination.
Helmet throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Helmet blocks a head kick by Lidell.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Helmet tries to bum rush Lidell with a series of wild strikes but Lidell uses good footwork to avoid the assault.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Lidell throws a head kick but Helmet moves out of range.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses.
Lidell throws a head kick but Helmet moves out of range.
A punch combination from Helmet misses.
Helmet throws a series of punches but Lidell moves out of range.
No joy there for Helmet, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
Lidell tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Lidell tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Lidell tries a head kick but it misses.
Some wild striking there from Helmet.
Helmet misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Helmet rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Lidell moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Lidell avoids a punch combination nicely.
Helmet misses with a jab, cross combination.
Lidell tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Helmet fails to land with a series of punches.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are getting on the fighters' backs, as the pace has dropped off in the last minute or so.
A head kick misses from Lidell.
Lidell pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Lidell misses with a head kick.
Helmet looks to land a combination but Lidell avoids it well.
Helmet looks to land a combination but Lidell avoids it well.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Helmet misses with a series of wild punches.
A combination from Helmet does no damage.
Lidell tries a head kick but it misses.
Helmet throws a series of punches but Lidell moves out of range.
A punch combination from Helmet misses.
Helmet misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Helmet misses with a jab, cross combination.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses.
The crowd thankful this round is nearly over.
Helmet rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Lidell moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Helmet misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Helmet throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Helmet avoids the head kick by Lidell.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Horny Helmet dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Chuck Lidell's cut.
That's time! Helmet's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight.

Lidell misses with a head kick.
Lidell avoids a punch combination nicely.
Helmet throws a series of punches but Lidell moves out of range.
Helmet misses with a double jab.
Helmet throws a right hand that Lidell ducks under and follows up with a left that Lidell also avoids with ease.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses.
Helmet swinging wildly here.
Helmet misses with a double jab.
Helmet looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Lidell pulls out of a head kick attempt.
No joy there for Helmet, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
No joy there for Helmet, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Helmet misses with a series of wild punches.
Both fighters are absolutely exhausted here.
Helmet lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but Lidell circles away quickly and effectively.
We are yet to see a takedown attempt from Lidell in the fight. On paper you would think he is the more dominant ground fighter so let's see if these unusual tactics pay off.
Lidell misses with a head kick.
Lidell tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Helmet closes the distance and lands a one-two.
Lidell showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Helmet.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Helmet avoids the head kick by Lidell.
Helmet misses with a double jab.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Lidell tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Helmet misses with a wild combination.
Lidell throws a head kick but Helmet moves out of range.
Lidell slips a jab and a cross from Helmet.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
A head kick misses from Lidell.
A punch combination from Helmet misses.
Helmet avoids the head kick by Lidell.
Lidell slips a jab and a cross from Helmet.
Helmet misses with a wild combination.
Lidell throws a head kick but Helmet moves out of range.
Helmet throws a nice looking combination but Lidell bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Helmet avoids the head kick by Lidell.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are getting on the fighters' backs, as the pace has dropped off in the last minute or so.
Helmet throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Helmet misses with a few strikes there.
Helmet looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Helmet looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Helmet throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Lidell throws a head kick but Helmet moves out of range.
A head kick misses from Lidell.
Helmet fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
No joy there for Helmet, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
Lidell tries a head kick but it misses.
A punch combination from Helmet misses.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Helmet fails to land with a series of punches.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Helmet throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Sloppy strikes from Helmet. Those never looked like landing.
Helmet blocks a head kick by Lidell.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
Helmet throws a series of punches but Lidell avoids them all with ease.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Lidell tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses.
Lidell throws a head kick but Helmet moves out of range.
Lidell dodges the punch combination from Helmet.
Helmet throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Helmet blocks a head kick by Lidell.
Lidell tries a head kick but it misses.
Helmet looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Lidell misses with a head kick.
A head kick misses from Lidell.
Helmet misses with a two punch combination.
Lidell tries a head kick but it misses.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses.
Helmet throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Lidell tries a head kick but it misses.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
Lidell throws a head kick but Helmet moves out of range.
Helmet swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.
Helmet throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Lidell.
Helmet fails to land with a series of punches.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are showing their displeasure at the lack of action as loud boos ring out around the arena.
Helmet misses with a jab, cross combination.
Helmet throws a series of punches but Lidell moves out of range.
Helmet misses with a double jab.
Helmet misses with a wild combination.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses.
Lidell misses with a head kick.
Lidell tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Helmet moves into range and throws a lovely three punch combination.
Helmet tries to bum rush Lidell with a series of wild strikes but Lidell uses good footwork to avoid the assault.
Lidell tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Helmet blocks a head kick by Lidell.
No joy there for Helmet, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
Lidell tries a head kick but it misses.
Helmet swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.
Boooooooooooooooooooo!!! God, this has been a terrible round. Come on you two, sort yourselves out!
Lidell slips a jab and a cross from Helmet.
Helmet blocks a head kick by Lidell.
Lidell avoids a punch combination nicely.
Helmet looks to land a combination but Lidell avoids it well.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Horny Helmet dominated that second round.
The cut man is working on Chuck Lidell's cut.
The fighters get back to their feet, the hooter sounds and we're back to the action! This is the final round!

Helmet throws a right and a left that Lidell avoids nicely.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
Sloppy strikes from Helmet. Those never looked like landing.
Lidell misses with a head kick.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Helmet misses with the combination.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses.
Helmet throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Lidell.
Helmet throws a series of punches but Lidell avoids them all with ease.
Helmet lands a jab followed by a nice looking cross.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Helmet misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Helmet blocks a head kick by Lidell.
We've had a slow start to the round here - hopefully the action picks up.
Lidell tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Horny Helmet is looking to throw some combinations by the looks of things.
Helmet misses with a double jab.
No joy there for Helmet, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
Lidell throws a head kick but Helmet moves out of range.
Both fighters are breathing heavily.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Helmet throws a right hand that Lidell ducks under and follows up with a left that Lidell also avoids with ease.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses.
Helmet throws a right hand that Lidell ducks under and follows up with a left that Lidell also avoids with ease.
Helmet throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Helmet throws a right hand that Lidell ducks under and follows up with a left that Lidell also avoids with ease.
Helmet throws a right hand that Lidell ducks under and follows up with a left that Lidell also avoids with ease.
Lidell misses with a head kick.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Lidell pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Lidell showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Helmet.
Lidell misses with a head kick.
Lidell avoids a punch combination nicely.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Lidell showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Helmet.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Helmet throws a nice looking combination but Lidell bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses.
Helmet blocks a head kick by Lidell.
Helmet rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Lidell moves out of range and avoids them all easily.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are getting on the fighters' backs, as the pace has dropped off in the last minute or so.
Lidell showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Helmet.
No joy there for Helmet, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
No joy there for Helmet, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
Helmet misses with the combination.
Helmet misses with a wild combination.
Helmet swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Sloppy strikes from Helmet. Those never looked like landing.
Helmet misses with a series of wild punches.
Helmet misses with a wild combination.
Helmet throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Lidell.
Helmet rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Lidell moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
Lidell throws a head kick but Helmet moves out of range.
Helmet misses with a double jab.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Lidell misses with a half-hearted attempt at a head kick.
Lidell throws a head kick but Helmet moves out of range.
Lidell tries a head kick but it misses.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
Helmet misses with the combination.
Lidell tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Lidell tries a switch kick but it misses it's target.
Helmet misses with a series of wild punches.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
Helmet tries to bum rush Lidell with a series of wild strikes but Lidell uses good footwork to avoid the assault.
Helmet misses with a jab, cross combination.
Helmet looks to land a combination but Lidell avoids it well.
Some wild striking there from Helmet.
Lidell throws a head kick that misses.
Lidell throws a sloppy head kick and Helmet moves out of range easily.
Lidell throws a head kick but Helmet moves out of range.
Sloppy strikes from Helmet. Those never looked like landing.
Lidell misses with a head kick.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are starting to boo a lack of action.
Helmet scores to the head and body with a nice combination!
Helmet tries to bum rush Lidell with a series of wild strikes but Lidell uses good footwork to avoid the assault.
Helmet avoids the head kick by Lidell.
Helmet throws a series of punches but Lidell avoids them all with ease.
Helmet misses with a two punch combination.
Helmet misses with a two punch combination.
Helmet misses with a two punch combination.
Lidell avoids a punch combination nicely.
Helmet misses with a two punch combination.
Helmet will need to tighten up his combinations if he doesn't want to gas himself out, swinging at thin air.
Lidell pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Lidell pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Helmet throws a combination but it was largely blocked by Lidell.
Helmet fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
Boooooooooooooooooooo!!! God, this has been a terrible round. Come on you two, sort yourselves out!
Helmet misses with a series of wild punches.
Helmet throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Helmet lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but Lidell circles away quickly and effectively.
Helmet throws a nice looking combination but Lidell bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.

And that's the end of the fight!
That was a close round. You could make an argument for either fighter but I would give it to Horny Helmet.
Well Helmet has outscored his opponent in every aspect of the fight today. Only a scarily incompetent judge or two will keep him from a well deserved win... Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Chad Campbell scores the fight for Horny Helmet!
Judge Columbo Gatti scores the fight for Horny Helmet!
Judge Lou da Vinci scores the fight for Horny Helmet!

Horny Helmet wins by unanimous decision!