PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Hakan Has (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Herpy McDerp (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Both fighters look fresh as a daisy as they make their way towards the cage.

Has
vs
McDerp

188 cm
26
226 lbs
0 - 2 - 0

192 cm
22
260 lbs
1 - 0 - 0

BJJ Purple Belt
Solid boxing
Good chin

BJJ Blue Belt
Decent boxing
Determined

Milwaukee's Best 159's - $45

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 0 - 2 - 0, fighting out of Sydney, Hakan Has!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 1 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Sydney, Herpy McDerp!
The judges for this bout are Steve Erwin, John Mangel and Skip Squint.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
McDerp stuffs the takedown.
McDerp lunges in with swinging rights and lefts but Has circles away quickly and effectively.
Has fails with a rather predictable takedown attempt.
McDerp throws a monster uppercut resembling something out of street fighter but it doesn't land.
Has looks to clinch

and McDerp counters by clinching up.
Has wants to take the fight to the mat but McDerp manages to get underhooks and keep the fight in the clinch.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Hakan Has. That's going to take a lot out of him.

McDerp breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat.
McDerp thows a left - swing and a miss!
McDerp throws a jab to the body, straight down the pipe. Boom. That sent Has stumbling backwards but he manages to regain his composure quickly.

McDerp gets the takedown into side control.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
The referee is pacing around the two fighters - he looks like he's thinking about a standup.
McDerp wants to lay and pray for a moment but Has keeps working.
Has avoids any damage from the ground and pound of McDerp.
McDerp throwing ground and pound but whilst doing so, he forgets to control position and Has works his way back to half guard. Good composure under pressure.
McDerp is taking a breather. Has says something to him but it's hard to make out. Perhaps he's telling him to get on with it and actually do something.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Has looks like he's trying to stand up.
McDerp is pressing down on Has's thigh, looking to free his foot. Has is holding on for now.
McDerp throwing shots but Has is blocking nicely.
McDerp throwing shots but Has is blocking nicely.
Still in half guard, McDerp seems content to control.
McDerp missing with some ground and pound from the half guard.
McDerp misses with a head shot. Has uses the momentum to regain guard.
McDerp must be cautious of submissions here, given that his opponent has the superior Jiu Jitsu.
McDerp is looking to work some ground and pound but Has has wrist control.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
McDerp postures up to throw the ground and pound strikes but they don't connect.
Has wants to stand and escape but McDerp is having none of it.
McDerp passes Has's left leg - he's now in half guard.
Has manages to get to full guard.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
McDerp stands up and looks to throw the legs aside to pass to side control. Has swivels though and keeps the full guard.
McDerp postures up in Has's guard and throws a big left but Has blocks it.
McDerp really doesn't want to stay on the ground with Has. If he can't get it back to his feet, it's only a matter of time before he'll be tapping out.

Has is working an open guard so McDerp takes the opportunity to get back to his feet.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.

McDerp has taken the fight to the clinch.

McDerp jumps guard and drags Has to the mat. He's obviously going to be looking for submissions off his back.
Has passes McDerp's right leg, so he's now in half guard.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Has is keen to just control but McDerp is a slippery customer.
McDerp tries to roll over but Has keeps him under control.
Has trying to control the action but McDerp is working from the bottom.
Has throwing shots but they're hitting the canvas more than the man.
Has wants to get back to his feet.
McDerp misses with some strikes from the bottom.
Has wants to take a breather but McDerp is having none of it.
Has sitting in half guard, looking to land shots. McDerp defending well though.
McDerp is positioning himself well to prevent Has advancing to mount.
We've had a lack of effective grappling in the last minute or so, which could well see a referee standup.
Has lands a big shot. The thud that echoes around the arena is like music to the fans' ears.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
McDerp is trying to maintain the position but Has is very close to passing his half guard.

McDerp has one foot on Has's thigh - he pushes off and manages to get back to his feet.
McDerp looks gassed!

McDerp scores a takedown into full mount!
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
McDerp throwing shots from mount but they're not landing.
Has regains half guard.
McDerp thows a huge punch but Has dodges it nicely.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Has manages to get to full guard.
McDerp preventing the sweep.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Herpy McDerp dominated that round.
OK. That's time! The bell goes and we're back to the action.

A head kick misses from Has.
Herpy McDerp seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.

McDerp feints and then dives in with a takedown. That was a long way out but the feint bought him enough time to close the distance and complete the takedown. Now we'll play guard for a bit and see who can get the better of that position.
McDerp wants to pass the guard but Has is keeping the position.
McDerp is looking to work some ground and pound but Has has wrist control.
McDerp won't allow Has to sweep him here.
Has is working hard here to advance position.
Has trying to keep a closed guard but McDerp is proving a slippery customer.

Has looking for submissions off his back, moving his hips, looking for an opening.
Has manages to sweep nicely, so he's now on top. McDerp manages to get himself to full guard.
Has works a leg free and moves into half guard.
Has prevents McDerp from standing back up.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Has wants to pass the guard but McDerp is defending well.
Has has freed up his trapped foot and advances to mount.
Herpy McDerp has got the better of the ground game so far.
McDerp is trying to get to the cage to help him get back to his feet.
McDerp is breathing heavily.
Has tries to control but McDerp wriggling away.
McDerp is trying desperately to improve position.
Has looking to control but McDerp is working nicely, looking to advance position himself.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Has wants to control the action but instead McDerp gets a body lock and reverses into Has's guard! Nice work!
The referee is asking the fighters to pick up the pace.
A big thud reverberates around the arena there as McDerp accidentally thumps the mat. Hopefully he's not broken his hand.
Has looking to control.
Has is really struggling to control McDerp but he's trying to hold on to the position.
McDerp throwing elbows and punches but not connecting, as Has works some decent striking defense from the bottom.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.

The ref stands the fighters back up. Hakan Has wasn't doing enough on the ground.
McDerp loads up on a big right hand but Has slips the punch.

McDerp is looking for a takedown here. He's shot in and has managed to get it, finishing up in Has's half guard.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Has is trying to stand up here but McDerp is controlling him well.
Has gets back to full guard.
Has controls McDerp momentarily but McDerp frees himself.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Has throws a couple of shots from the bottom but they don't land.
McDerp throws an elbow that misses. Has uses the momentum to reverse the position. He's now in McDerp's guard. Nice move by Has!
McDerp looking to hit a scissor sweep but Has is one step ahead there.
A big thud reverberates around the arena there as Has accidentally thumps the mat. Hopefully he's not broken his hand.
McDerp not looking particularly offensive just at the moment.
McDerp keeping full guard, as Has tries to pass.
Has wants to control from the top but McDerp keeps moving.
Has won't allow McDerp to get back to his feet.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Has trying to control but McDerp is working from the bottom.

The ref stands the fighters back up. Hakan Has wasn't doing enough on the ground.
A head kick misses from Has.
Has shoots in but doesn't get the takedown
and McDerp makes him pay by landing a nice hook to the body before moving out of range.
McDerp slips in close and lands a nice hook before moving back out of range.
Hakan Has is looking to throw some combinations by the looks of things.
Has tries to shoot in for a takedown. He's got hold of a leg but McDerp swivels and escapes.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
Has shoots for a double leg takedown but McDerp sprawls well. He's pushed Has's face into the mat and manages to get back to his feet relatively easily.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Hakan Has. That's going to take a lot out of him.

Has gets caught flat footed, as McDerp shoots in with a quick takedown into guard.
This has been an exciting period of action!
McDerp stopping the sweep attempt from Has.
McDerp throws a strike but Has rolls with it and manages to sweep. Now he's in guard on top.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

A close second round but Herpy McDerp will probably get the nod - 10:9.
That's the end of the round. The referee orders the cornermen out of the cage so we can get back down to business. This is the final round!

The fight moves into the clinch position.
Has is looking for a takedown up against the cage. McDerp gets underhooks though and prevents the takedown attempt.

McDerp breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
Has misses with a takedown attempt. He shot from a bit too far out.
Has doesn't manage to clinch there - McDerp circles away.

McDerp pushes Has up against the cage in a clinch.
Has tries to pull guard but McDerp won't allow it.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Hakan Has. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Has tries to take the fight to the ground by pulling guard but can't manage it.
McDerp is stalling here. The referee will be looking to step in if he doesn't pick up the pace.

That's one minute gone in the round.
McDerp prevents the takedown attempt.
Has wants a takedown.
Both fighters are breathing heavily.

McDerp breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat.
McDerp scores with a crisp jab that stopped Has in his tracks.

McDerp moves into the clinch successfully.
McDerp stalling against the cage.
A quick uppercut on the inside from McDerp.
Has can't break the clinch.
McDerp digs a right hand into Has's ribs. Those have got to be taking their toll on Has's gas tank.

McDerp breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat.
Has uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from McDerp.
A telegraphed right hand from McDerp misses the target.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Has misses with a takedown attempt - McDerp sprawls well and throws a nice strike on the way out which just misses.
McDerp cracks Has with a nice right hand that draws applause from the crowd.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Has has his takedown stuffed

and McDerp counters with a takedown into full mount! That could mean trouble for Has!
McDerp throwing shots from mount but they're not landing.
Has wriggling around on the bottom manages to avoid the strikes thrown by McDerp.
McDerp looking to finish with strikes here!
McDerp thuds his fist into the canvas! Oooouch!
McDerp thowing strikes but they're hitting the gloves, not doing any damage.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
McDerp throws a strike there. Has manages to avoid it well and slips a leg under to get to half guard.
McDerp not landing any meaningful shots this time.
Has tries to roll over but McDerp keeps him under control.
Has is staying active underneath McDerp, who seems content to just control the action from this position.
McDerp throwing shots but they're hitting the canvas more than the man.
McDerp missing with some ground and pound from the half guard.
McDerp missing with some ground and pound from the half guard.
Has has no desire to be mounted, so is trying to control. McDerp is working away from the top position though.
McDerp thows a wild elbow that connects with the canvas.

That's four minutes gone in the round.

McDerp looking for a kimura but he'll have to free his other leg if he wants to finish that. Perhaps he's just using it as a distraction technique.
Has is trying to stand back up but McDerp is controlling him

McDerp is looking for a kimura here.
Has wants to control but McDerp is keeping busy.
Hakan Has has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Herpy McDerp is fighting for a decision - hopefully he's judged it right and he's actually winning the fight.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
Has throws a strike from the bottom that misses.

And that's the end of the fight!
Herpy McDerp comfortably won the final round on my scorecard.
Well McDerp has outworked and out performed his opponent in all aspects of the game today. He was simply too good and the decision should be no more than a formality. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Steve Erwin scores the fight 28:30
Judge John Mangel scores the fight 27:30
Judge Skip Squint scores the fight 27:30

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Herpy McDerp!