PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a lightweight MMA rules bout between Tony Tits (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Earl Sweatpants (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Sweatpants is bobbing his head along to his entrance song: Earl - Earl Sweatshirt. The key to victory for Tony Tits has got to be keeping the fight on the feet.

Tits
vs
Sweatpants

170 cm
22
150 lbs
2 - 1 - 0

180 cm
25
160 lbs
3 - 1 - 0

BJJ Blue Belt
Good kicks
Granite chin

BJJ Blue Belt
Counter striker
Prefers standup

NEBULA Clothing
Charlie Wang's Tattered Rags & 95% Laundry

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the lightweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 2 - 1 - 0, fighting out of Tokyo, Tony Tits!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 3 - 1 - 0, fighting out of Tokyo, Earl Sweatpants!
The judges for this bout are Sosuke Kotani, Shigeki Fujiwara and Yasuomi Hirokawa.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!

Tits pushes Sweatpants up against the cage in a clinch.
Tits tries to break free but Sweatpants pushes him back against the cage.
Tits goes for a takedown attempt but Sweatpants pushes him away and we're back to fighting at a distance.
Tits shoots in but doesn't get the takedown
and Sweatpants counters with a straight punch to the midsection.
Tits shoots in but doesn't get the takedown
and Sweatpants counters with a nice low kick that buckles Tits's knee momentarily.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Tony Tits. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Tits has his takedown stuffed
and Sweatpants counters with a straight right hand.
Tits shoots and misses
and Sweatpants counters with a left and a right that stings Tits.
Sweatpants throws a head kick that misses.

Tits fakes with an overhand right and moves in to clinch with Sweatpants, pushing him back against the cage.
Kneeeeees! The crowd are calling for knees to the body. Tits obliges.
Tits with the Thai clinch. He's looking to land a big knee but he's not managed it this time.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.

Tits gets a trip takedown into half guard.
Tits is breathing heavily.

That's one minute gone in the round.
If this pace continues, the referee will definitely step in and force a standup.

Sweatpants has one foot on Tits's thigh - he pushes off and manages to get back to his feet.
Tits has his takedown stuffed
and Sweatpants counters with a three punch combination, finished off with a leg kick. Nice work.

Sweatpants tries to keep at a distance but Tits has taken the fight into the clinch.
Tits has Sweatpants pressed up against the cage and is working for takedown. Sweatpants manages to improve position though and keeps the fight standing.
Tits throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Sweatpants blocks it with crossed arms.

Sweatpants pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat.
Sweatpants connects with a crisp jab.
Tits doesn't succeed with the takedown
and Sweatpants counters with a head kick.
Tits has his takedown stuffed
and Sweatpants counters with a quick right hand to the jaw.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Tits shoots and misses
enabling Sweatpants to counter with a crisp jab.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Sweatpants scores with a head kick. Tits tried to block it but didn't get his arm up in time.
Tits with a poor takedown
enabling Sweatpants to counter with a crisp jab.
Sweatpants lands with an uppercut that bounces Tits off the cage and back into range.
Tits misses with a takedown
and Sweatpants counters with a nice body shot.
Sloppy strikes from Sweatpants. Those never looked like landing.
Tony Tits seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
Tits has his takedown stuffed
and Sweatpants counters with a head kick. That will keep Tits thinking before he tries any more sloppy attacks!
Sweatpants misses with a wild combination.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Sweatpants throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Sweatpants displays good takedown defense there as he swats away a double leg from Tits.
Tits gets his takedown attempt stuffed easily
and Sweatpants counters with a stiff right hand.
Tits has his takedown stuffed
and Sweatpants counters with a straight right hand.
Tits shoots in but doesn't get the takedown
and Sweatpants counters with a quick right hand to the jaw.

Tits closes the distance and presses his opponent up against the cage.
Tits wants a takedown.

That's four minutes gone in the round.

Sweatpants manages to break the clinch.
Tits doesn't succeed with the takedown
and Sweatpants counters with a three punch combination, finished off with a leg kick. Nice work.
Tits takes a jab right on the kisser.

The fight moves into the clinch position.
Tits misses with a hook from the clinch.

Sweatpants wants the takedown. Tits is fighting it off but Sweatpants persists and manages to bring the fight to the ground, ending up in Tits's guard against the cage.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
Sweatpants throws a big elbow that misses.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.

Tits is looking for a triangle but Sweatpants pushes his legs off easily.

Tits looking for a guillotine here but Sweatpants defends easily.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

A close round but Earl Sweatpants will probably get the nod.
The referee calls time. The cornermen exit stage left and we're back to business.

Sweatpants will need to tighten up his combinations if he doesn't want to gas himself out, swinging at thin air.
Tits fails with the takedown
letting Sweatpants counter with a right hand.
Tits misses with a takedown attempt
and Sweatpants cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.

Tits has closed the distance and engaged Sweatpants in a clinch.

Tits breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat.
Both fighters are absolutely exhausted here.
Sweatpants lands a glancing blow to the side of Tits's head.
Tits tries for a takedown but Sweatpants circles away easily
and Sweatpants counters with a big head kick but Tits shrugs it off.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Tony Tits. That's going to take a lot out of him.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Tits shoots in but doesn't get the takedown
and Sweatpants counters with a one-two to the body.
Sweatpants swinging wildly here.
Tits tries for a takedown but Sweatpants circles away easily
letting Sweatpants counter with a right hand.
Tits with a poor takedown
and Sweatpants counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.

Tits moves into the clinch.

Tits is fighting off a takedown attempt but Sweatpants is just too persistent for him and manages to trip Tits to the mat. Tits regains guard as soon as the fighters hit the mat.

Tits has a loose triangle. He'll be looking to tighten that up but Sweatpants can see exactly what he's planning and manages to posture up and free himself.

Tits throwing his legs up looking for a triangle.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Sweatpants lands a couple of elbows.
Tits wants to sweep but no luck.

Tits is looking for a triangle but Sweatpants pushes his legs off easily.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Sweatpants cracks Tits with a solid left hand.

Tits looking for subs off his back but Sweatpants has passed one foot through into half guard.
Tits is looking to get back to full guard here but Sweatpants has managed to pass to side control instead.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Sweatpants landing strikes.
The fighters are pressed up against the cage, both looking to find a bit of space to work.
Sweatpants landing with strikes to the head and body from side control.
Tits is trying to get back to half guard.
Sweatpants has the superior BJJ but he's also working some ground strikes into his gameplan.
Tits tries to control but end up mounted... ooooh, that's bad.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Tits is trying to escape the mount.
Sweatpants dominating with strikes here.
Tits is working to get back to half guard.
A nice elbow there by Sweatpants.
Sweatpants is in the full mount, landing strikes.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
Tits is trying desperately to improve position.
Sweatpants punishing his opponent with strikes.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Earl Sweatpants showed his class in that round. I'd imagine he'll take it on all the scorecards.
The fighters' corners scream their final instructions, as the referee calls time. Here we go, back to the action! Let's get this one finished - here comes the final round!

Sweatpants scores with a nice right hand.

Tits moves into range and clinches up with Sweatpants.
Tits throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Sweatpants blocks it with crossed arms.
Tits missing with knees to the body.
Sweatpants gets double underhooks to prevent a takedown attempt from Tits.
We are yet to see a takedown attempt from Sweatpants in the fight. On paper you would think he is the more dominant ground fighter so let's see if these unusual tactics pay off.
Tits has hold of a leg and is looking for a trip takedown. Sweatpants avoids it nicely though and we remain in the clinch.
Tits tries to jump guard but he falls flat on his backside. Sweatpants smiles and moves away.
That's three failed takedown attempts in the round for Tony Tits. That's going to take a lot out of him.
Both fighters are breathing heavily.
Tits blocks a head kick by Sweatpants.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Tits dodges the punch combination from Sweatpants.
Tits tries for a takedown but Sweatpants circles away easily
and Sweatpants counters with a good right hand that lands right on the jaw.
Sweatpants scores with a head kick.
Tits has his takedown stuffed
and Sweatpants counters with a leg kick.
Tits doesn't succeed with the takedown
and Sweatpants counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Sweatpants changes levels and scores with a jab to the body.
Tits shoots in but doesn't get the takedown
and Sweatpants counters with a body kick that stops Tits in his tracks momentarily.
Left hook, right uppercut from Sweatpants.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
No luck with that takedown attempt from Tits.
Sweatpants scores with a jab to the body.
Tits tries for a takedown but Sweatpants circles away easily
and Sweatpants counters with a nice body kick.
Tits fails with the takedown
and Sweatpants counters with a straight right hand.
Sweatpants lands three nice shots there - that looked like it hurt!
Sweatpants slaps away a takedown attempt from Tits, before circling back to the center of the mat.
Tits staying out of range there.
Earl Sweatpants is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
No joy there for Sweatpants, who threw a few shots but didn't land.
Tits changes levels and looks for a double leg takedown. Sweatpants tries to avoid it but Tits manages to keep hold of a leg and drag Sweatpants to the ground. Sweatpants escapes though and pops straight back up to his feet.
Tits with a poor takedown
and Sweatpants counters with a stiff right hand.
Tits with a lazy takedown attempt
and Sweatpants counters with a stiff right hand.
Tits looks like he's developed a pretty tasty lump over his left eye. He'll need to avoid taking much more damage to that.
Sweatpants scores with a jab to the head.

Tits clinches.
Tits looking for a takedown.

Sweatpants's corner calls for him to break the clinch, which he does.

Tits pushes Sweatpants up against the cage in a clinch.
Tits tries a knee to the head but Sweatpants blocks it.
Sweatpants gets double underhooks to prevent a takedown attempt from Tits.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Tits tries a knee to the head but Sweatpants blocks it.
Tits with an attempt at a knee that misses.
Tits is looking for a takedown up against the cage. Sweatpants gets underhooks though and prevents the takedown attempt.

Sweatpants escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
Tits shoots and misses
and Sweatpants counters with a left and a right that stings Tits.
Tits gets his takedown attempt stuffed easily
and Sweatpants counters with a left and a right that stings Tits.
The crowd applaud the fighters efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Tits misses with a takedown attempt
and Sweatpants connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
Tony Tits has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Earl Sweatpants is fighting for a decision - hopefully he's judged it right and he's actually winning the fight.
A head kick from Sweatpants lands but Tits takes it in his stride.

And that's the end of the fight!
I would just about give that final round to Earl Sweatpants.
I've got Sweatpants winning every round here. Surely the decision will go his way and he'll pick up a well deserved decision victory. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Sosuke Kotani scores the fight 29:28
Judge Shigeki Fujiwara scores the fight 27:30
Judge Yasuomi Hirokawa scores the fight 28:30

In favor of your winner, by split decision... Earl Sweatpants!
Our winner, Earl Sweatpants, made sure he spent some time buttering up the crowd during his post fight interview, which will no doubt bring him a few more fans.