PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a welterweight MMA rules bout between M C Hammer (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Eddy Jones (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Hammer's entrance music is M.C. Hammer: U Cant Touch This. A fine choice. Eddy Jones is staring across the cage at his opponent, tweaking his nipples.

C Hammer
vs
Jones

181 cm
33
171 lbs
24 - 9 - 0

178 cm
24
167 lbs
8 - 4 - 0

Decent wrestler
World class boxer
Insanely flexible

Good wrestler
Excellent boxer
Good gas tank

Brute

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the welterweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 24 - 9 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, M C Hammer!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 8 - 4 - 0, fighting out of Hilo, Eddy Jones!
The judges for this bout are Chris Saunders, Paul Gruel and Colin Fray.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!

Hammer darts in and clinches Jones up against the cage.
Hammer has a couple of punches blocked by Jones.
Jones lands a hook to the body. It's hard to tell if that hurt Hammer or not.
Hammer unloads a knee to the mid-section. Jones lets out a prehistoric sounding urrrrgh.
Jones lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of Hammer backwards.
Jones has Hammer pushed against the cage.
Jones lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of Hammer backwards.
Jones takes a knee right on the jaw!
Jones tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Hammer misses with a hook to the ribs.
Hammer tries a body shot but Jones blocks it.
An uppercut to the body lands inside from Hammer.
Jones is stalling here. The referee will be looking to step in if he doesn't pick up the pace.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Hammer tries to work over Jones's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Hammer lands a good knee to the midsection. Jones won't want to take too many of those.
Jones throws a punch but it's blocked by Hammer.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Jones wants to strike at distance but he can't break free of the clinch.
Jones managing to block the knees to the body from Hammer.
Hammer lands with a left to the head.
Jones tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Hammer tries a knee to the head but he's missed.
A battle for position here, against the cage.
Hammer misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Hammer lands on the inside with an uppercut.
Hammer can't find room to land a body shot as Jones controls the action.
Jones fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Jones managing to block the knees to the body from Hammer.
Jones blocking some punches.
Hammer lands a body shot.
Hammer tries to land a knee to the head but Jones blocks with his arms.
Hammer makes some space for himself and lands an uppercut.
Jones misses with a hook from the clinch.
Nice body punch from Jones - that landed with a thud.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Hammer misses with a body punch.
Hammer lands a hook to the body. It's hard to tell if that hurt Jones or not.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Hammer tries to land knees in the clinch but Jones avoids the damage to the body.
Hammer scores with a nice hook to the head.
A hook to the body from Hammer.
Jones is looking to control Hammer's arms but Hammer gets an underhook and turns him. Now Jones has his back to the cage.
Hammer using the Thai plumb to throw knees but Jones has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
Hammer swings away with an uppercut that misses.
A short uppercut from Hammer.
Jones prevents a body shot from Hammer.
Hammer takes a shot to the head.
Hammer scores with an uppercut up the middle.
Jones tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Hammer tries to throw a body punch but Jones avoids it by throwing Hammer back against the cage.
Jones misses with a body punch.
With the fighters clinched against the cage, Jones creates a bit of distance for himself and scores with a nice uppercut.
Jones trying to control the position but instead, Hammer has worked for underhooks and has pushed Jones into the cage.
A right hook to the body lands for Hammer.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Hammer struggles to land a body shot inside as Jones controls his hands.
Still in the clinch, Hammer scores with a nice short uppercut.
Hammer landing knees to the head.
Jones swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Hammer misses with a knee to the head.
Jones misses with the head strike.
Jones is trying to maintain a safe position but Hammer gets an underhook and turns Jones into the cage.

Jones breaks the clinch.
Jones connects with a leg kick. Hammer looked like he was expecting something else and didn't defend it.
Hammer scores with a punch to the gut of his opponent.
A head kick from Hammer lands but Jones takes it in his stride.
Jones looks for a takedown but Hammer sprawls well.
Hammer swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.
Jones stumbles momentarily as he takes a strong leg kick from Hammer.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Jones tries to land a leg kick but Hammer saw it coming and moves away.
M C Hammer seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
A left and a right from Hammer both land. Nice combination.
A chopping leg kick lands by Hammer.
Hammer misses with a body kick.
Hammer punishes Jones's body with a nice straight punch.
Jones dives in and grabs Hammer's left leg, looking for a takedown. Hammer pushes down on Jones's head and hops out.
Jones looks to land a combination but Hammer avoids it well.
Jones shoots in looking for a double leg takedown. Hammer defends it nicely.
M C Hammer has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Eddy Jones.
Jones misses with the combination.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Hammer throws a body kick that sends a sickening thudding noise reverberating around the arena.
Nice shot by Jones.
An inside leg kick from Jones misses.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

M C Hammer dominated that round.
That's time! Back to the action!

Jab, jab by Hammer - just one landing.
Hammer blocks a low kick nicely.
Hammer digs a good hook to Jones's body.
Jones looks for the body kick but Hammer saw that one coming.
Hammer connects with a leg kick. He turned his hip over nicely there.
Jones throws an overhand right that lands on Hammer's shoulder, as Hammer tries to avoid the shot.
Hammer wants to clinch up but Jones keeps it at a distance.
M C Hammer is winning the standup battle so far.
Hammer tries to clinch but Jones moves out of range.
Hammer tries to clinch but Jones moves away
and Jones counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Hammer checks a leg kick.
Jones misses with a body shot
and Hammer counters with a lovely straight right hand!
Jones swats away the attempt to clinch by Hammer.
Hammer throws a solid leg kick but Jones takes the impact on his shin and smiles at Hammer.
Jones throws a left and a right that both miss
and Hammer counters with a nice uppercut.
Hammer tries to clinch up
and Jones counters with an inside leg kick.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Hammer pivots as if he's going to throw a leg kick but stops half way.
Hammer is the aggressor but that punch slipped nicely by Jones.
Jones swats away the attempt to clinch by Hammer.
Jones throws a series of punches but Hammer avoids them all with ease.
Hammer lands with a nice body punch.
Hammer misses with a wild body shot.
A shot to the body from Hammer misses
and Jones counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.
M C Hammer is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.
Hammer tries to close the distance and clinch but Jones swats him to one side with an open hand palm strike and circles away.
Hammer thows a leg kick but Jones checks it
and Jones counters with a two punch combo.
Jones will have to do better than that with his takedown attempts.
Jones throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Hammer buckles his opponent's knee momentarily with a nice leg kick.
Hammer lands a nice looking body shot.
Jones looks frustrated there after his takedown attempt is stuffed easily.
Hammer misses with a body kick.
Hammer tries to clinch up but Jones circles away and keeps his distance.

Hammer drives through and clinches with Jones against the cage.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Hammer prevents a body shot from Jones.
Jones fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Hammer lands on the inside with an uppercut.
Jones tries to work over Hammer's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Hammer throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Jones blocks it with crossed arms.
Hammer lands with a short head shot on the inside.
Jones working hard to break the clinch.
Hammer struggles to land a body shot inside as Jones controls his hands.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Hammer.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
A head punch on the inside from Hammer fails to land.
Jones is trying desperately to land a takedown but Hammer is having absolutely none of it. This is turning into a bit of a nightmare for Jones.
Hammer misses with a body punch.
A hook to the body from Hammer.
Hammer blocks an uppercut.
Hammer tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Both fighters working to control the clinch.
Jones misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Hammer tries to work over Jones's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Hammer crunches a lovely knee into Jones's ribcage.
Jones swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Jones is trying to stall.
Hammer blocking some punches.
A real battle for position is taking place between these two warriors.
Hammer misses with a knee to the head.
Hammer connects with a knee to the head.
With the fighters clinched against the cage, Hammer creates a bit of distance for himself and scores with a nice uppercut.
Hammer tries to throw a body punch but Jones avoids it by throwing Hammer back against the cage.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Hammer tries to land a knee to the body but he is off balance and Jones avoids it.
Jones misses with a hook from the clinch.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Jones.
Hammer landing knees to the head.

It looks like Eddy Jones has been cut.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Jones lands with a short head shot on the inside.
Hammer working aggressively here.
Jones looking to slow down the pace here.
Hammer tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Jones's elbow.
Hammer tries a knee to the head but he's missed.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Hammer.
Jones tries to stall but Hammer uses the opportunity to gain a better position.
Hammer keeps the fight in the clinch, despite Jones's efforts to push away.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
Hammer lands a knee to the body.
Hammer lands with a light punch inside.
Jones on the defensive, avoiding the knees to the body.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

M C Hammer dominated that second round.
The cut man is working on Eddy Jones's cut.
The corners get their ten second warning. Both fighters stand from their stools and stare eachother down, ready to get back to the action. This is the final round!

A shot to the liver by Hammer. Beautiful body shot.
Hammer throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Hammer misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Hammer throws a sloppy head kick and Jones moves out of range easily.
Jones fakes with the hands and throws a leg kick but Hammer is out of range.
Jones shoots in and drives through. Hammer sprawls well.
Jones takes a punch to the jaw and another one to the bread basket.
Hammer lands with a thumping leg kick.

Hammer forces Jones back against the cage and clinches.
A short body shot lands from Hammer as the two fighters clinch.
Hammer lands a shoulder strike that jolts his opponent's head backwards.
A right hook to the body lands for Hammer.
An uppercut to the body lands inside from Hammer.
Jones takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Hammer scores with a shot to the side of Jones's head.
Hammer tries to work over Jones's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Jones blocks a body shot from Hammer.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Hammer misses with a body punch.
Hammer lands a nice uppercut.
Hammer lands a body punch in the clinch.
A short right from Jones.
Jones swings wildly with an uppercut but Hammer uses good head movement to avoid it.
M C Hammer has scored more points in the clinch so far.
Hammer misses with a hook to the ribs.
Hammer tries a body shot but Jones blocks it.
Hammer blocks a body shot from Jones.
Hammer misses with a knee to the head.
Hammer is trying to wear down his opponent with knees to the body.
Hammer misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Hammer misses with a knee strike.
Hammer lands a right hand.
Jones misses with a short punch on the inside.
Jones managing to block the knees to the body from Hammer.
Eddy Jones has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Hammer using the Thai plumb to throw knees but Jones has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Still in the clinch, Hammer scores with a nice short uppercut.
Jones misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Hammer is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Jones can do to turn this around?
Hammer misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Hammer throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Jones blocks it with crossed arms.
Jones looking to stall.
Hammer lands a right hand that snaps the head of Jones backwards.
Hammer lands with a short head shot on the inside.
Hammer presses Jones against the cage and delivers a mid-strength body shot.
Both fighters working to control the clinch.
Jones has a couple of punches blocked by Hammer.
Hammer working Jones over with knees to the body.
Hammer tries to work over Jones's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Hammer misses with a punch to the body.
Jones content to slow the pace in the clinch.
A nice left hand lands by Hammer.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Jones tries to work over Hammer's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Hammer tries a knee to the head but Jones blocks it.
Jones swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Jones is looking to control Hammer's arms but Hammer gets an underhook and turns him. Now Jones has his back to the cage.
Good body shot from Hammer.
Hammer landing knees to the body.
Hammer tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
Hammer pushes Jones back against the cage and lands a hook to the side of the head.
Hammer landing knees to the body. They look like they could hurt.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Jones.
Jones fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Hammer is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. Jones is defending well for now.
Hammer lands with a right to the head.
Hammer blocks an uppercut.
Both fighters working to control the clinch.
Jones takes a shot to the head.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Hammer works on Jones's body with a couple of short punches.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Hammer misses with a hook to the ribs.
Both guys are working to get underhooks.
Jones tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Jones working aggressively here.
A frustrated look appears on Jones's face as he tries to break the clinch.
Hammer lands a body punch in the clinch.
An uppercut to the body lands inside from Hammer.
Jones swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Hammer misses with a knee to the head.
Hammer is trying to wear down his opponent with knees to the body.
A body shot lands from Hammer.
Knees in the clinch landing for Hammer.
Hammer is working Jones over against the cage.
Hammer blocks an uppercut.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Hammer unloads a knee to the mid-section. Jones lets out a prehistoric sounding urrrrgh.
Hammer presses Jones against the cage and delivers a mid-strength body shot.
Hammer tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Jones tries a body shot but Hammer blocks it.

And that's the end of the fight!
M C Hammer showed his dominance in that final round.
Well Hammer has outscored his opponent in every aspect of the fight today. Only a scarily incompetent judge or two will keep him from a well deserved win... Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Chris Saunders scores the fight 30:27
Judge Paul Gruel scores the fight 30:27
Judge Colin Fray scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... M C Hammer!
A very excited looking M C Hammer rambled incoherently for about 5 minutes post fight about how awesome he is. It was kinda funny for a while but then everyone got annoyed.