PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight MMA rules bout between Shaquille O Neal (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and FTWinfected Infect (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). O Neal comes into the arena with Fuck you blaring out of the sound system. We have two fighters making their debuts here, so let's see who comes out of this one with their first professional victory.

O Neal
vs
Infect

215 cm
18
225 lbs
0 - 0 - 0

178 cm
18
165 lbs
0 - 0 - 0

BJJ White Belt
Brawler
Granite chin

BJJ Blue Belt
Brawler
Granite chin

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 0 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Hilo, Shaquille O Neal!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 0 - 0 - 0, fighting out of Hilo, FTWinfected Infect!
The judges for this bout are Jeff Smith, Colin Fray and Josh West.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
O Neal wants to clinch.
Infect throws a big shot that misses.
Infect shoots in looking for a takedown but O Neal manages to keep the fight standing, pushing Infect's face into the canvas for good measure before circling away.

O Neal clinches up against the cage.
O Neal lands a nice uppercut.
Infect stalling here - the referee won't stand for too much of that.
Infect tries to land a knee to the head but O Neal blocks with his arms.
Infect can't get the takedown.
Infect blocking some punches.
A short right from O Neal.
O Neal doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
O Neal doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
O Neal misses with the head strike.
Infect blocking some punches.
The referee is keeping an eye on O Neal - much more stalling and he will separate the fighters.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Infect jumps guard but O Neal stands there with Infect around his waist. Infect gives up and drops back to his feet. We remain in the clinch.
Shaquille O Neal has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of FTWinfected Infect.
Infect dictating the pace here, as the fighters clinch against the cage.
Infect wants to get back to striking at distance but O Neal won't allow it.
O Neal lands on the inside with an uppercut.
A frustrated look appears on Infect's face as he tries to break the clinch.
O Neal has Infect pushed against the cage.
Infect has had enough of the clinch and is looking to separate.
A short uppercut from O Neal.
Infect drops to a knee looking for a takedown but O Neal gets the underhooks and prevents it.
Infect can't get the takedown.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
O Neal prevents a takedown attempt there.
Infect tries to pull guard but O Neal holds him up against the cage and eventually Infect drops back down to his feet.
O Neal controlling the action here for a moment.
O Neal scores with an uppercut up the middle.
O Neal tries to work over Infect's body with a swooping hook but it only glances the target.
Infect tries to pull guard but O Neal holds him up against the cage and eventually Infect drops back down to his feet.
Infect is trying to pull guard but being pressed up against the cage enables O Neal to keep the fight standing.
O Neal content to slow the pace in the clinch.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
A short right from O Neal.
O Neal stalling in the clinch.
O Neal lands with a short shot to the head.
O Neal misses with a body punch.
O Neal swings wildly with an uppercut but Infect uses good head movement to avoid it.
A right hook to the body lands for Infect.
O Neal misses with a hook from the clinch.
O Neal lands with a quick shot inside that doesn't really do much damage.
Infect is working hard here but doesn't seem to be able to control effectively, up against the cage.
Infect goes for a takedown in the clinch but O Neal prevents it.
Infect looks gassed!
A quick uppercut on the inside from O Neal.
O Neal has a couple of punches blocked by Infect.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
O Neal working aggressively here.
Infect is trying to work out of this bad position, with his back against the cage.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Infect.
Infect wants to break free. God knows he wants to breaaaak freeee.
Infect is trying to pull guard but being pressed up against the cage enables O Neal to keep the fight standing.
Infect is trying to pull guard but O Neal turns him against the cage and we stay in the clinch.
O Neal stalling the fight.
O Neal tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
The fighters are pressed against the cage, as the pace of the fight slows.
A right hand to the body from O Neal.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
As the round comes to an end the crowd are showing their appreciation for a great round of action.
Infect's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Shaquille O Neal dominated that round.
OK. That's time! The bell goes and we're back to the action.

O Neal tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in the close the distance. Infect manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
O Neal tries to clinch but Infect is having none of it.
O Neal closes the distance looking to clinch
and Infect counters with a head kick. That will keep O Neal thinking before he tries any more sloppy attacks!
O Neal doesn't manage to clinch there - Infect circles away.
Infect circles away from the clinch attempt.
O Neal tries to clinch but Infect is having none of it.
O Neal fails in his attempt to clinch.
Infect avoids the clinch attempt nicely.
O Neal stuffs the takedown attempt from Infect. Infect gets slowly back to his feet.
Nice sprawl there from O Neal as Infect shoots in.
O Neal tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in the close the distance. Infect manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
Infect looks frustrated there after his takedown attempt is stuffed easily.
Shaquille O Neal has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of FTWinfected Infect.
O Neal wants to clinch.
O Neal really does look like a pencil wearing a pair of gloves. Let's hope he has a gameplan to suit that ridiculous body shape.
Infect is breathing heavily.
The fight stays on the outside here - O Neal looks like he's thinking about clinching though.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Infect throws a series of punches but O Neal moves out of range.
O Neal tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in the close the distance. Infect manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
O Neal is looking to clinch but Infect is avoiding it.
O Neal tries to close the distance and clinch up but Infect swats him away and circles back towards the center.
Shaquille O Neal is looking to keep the fight on the feet at all costs.

O Neal closes the distance and clinches.
O Neal fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Infect is trying to push O Neal away but O Neal has him pressed against the cage, so he's going nowhere.
O Neal gets through Infect's defenses to land a nice punch to the side of the head.
Infect jumps guard but O Neal stands there with Infect around his waist. Infect gives up and drops back to his feet. We remain in the clinch.
Shaquille O Neal has scored more points in the clinch so far.
Infect blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
Infect wants to break the clinch but can't.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Good anti-grappling being displayed by O Neal as Infect tries to tie him up.
O Neal stalling against the cage.
O Neal is pressed up against the cage. Infect has hold of a leg and is looking to drag O Neal down to the mat. O Neal avoids the attempt though and has circled away. We're back to striking at a distance.
Infect shoots in for a takedown - he's clinched up with O Neal but O Neal pushes him off and we're back to square one.
O Neal tries to close the distance and clinch up but Infect swats him away and circles back towards the center.
The fight stays on the outside here - O Neal looks like he's thinking about clinching though.
O Neal tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in the close the distance. Infect manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
Infect circles away from the clinch attempt
and Infect counters with an outside leg kick.

O Neal moves into range and clinches up with Infect.
Infect tries to pull guard but can't drag his opponent to the mat. O Neal just stands there and leans against the cage.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
O Neal tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
O Neal lands a nice uppercut.
O Neal tries to throw a body punch but Infect avoids it by throwing O Neal back against the cage.
O Neal lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage.
O Neal lands a shoulder strike.
Infect is trying to pull guard but O Neal has him pressed against the cage.
Infect blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Infect has dropped down and is looking to force the takedown but it's defended by O Neal after a bit of a struggle.
O Neal taking a break, stalling in the clinch.
Still in the clinch, O Neal scores with a nice short uppercut.
O Neal misses with a hook to the ribs.
Infect's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
Infect has hold of a leg and is looking for a trip takedown. O Neal avoids it nicely though and we remain in the clinch.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
O Neal misses with a short punch on the inside.
A shot in the inside from O Neal.
O Neal will no doubt start fighting again in a minute but for now he's just having a little rest, leaning Infect up against the cage.
Infect taking a breather.
O Neal stalling the fight.
O Neal lands with a light punch inside.
The crowd applaud the fighters efforts here as the round comes to an end.
O Neal taking a breather.
O Neal gets a warning from the ref for wasting time.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Shaquille O Neal dominated that second round.
That's time! Back to the action! This is the final round!

O Neal is looking to clinch but Infect is avoiding it.
Infect circles away from the clinch attempt.
The fight stays on the outside here - O Neal looks like he's thinking about clinching though.
Infect shoots for a double leg takedown but O Neal sprawls well. He's pushed Infect's face into the mat and manages to get back to his feet relatively easily.
Infect keeps the fight on the outside.
Infect throws a combination but it was largely blocked by O Neal.
O Neal fails with an attempt to clinch.
Infect is looking to clinch.
O Neal wants to clinch up but Infect keeps it at a distance.
O Neal takes a step back and watches a body kick go sailing past his mid section.
O Neal closes the distance looking to clinch
and Infect counters with a good low kick that O Neal was not able to check.
O Neal wants to clinch
and Infect counters with a leg kick.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Infect changes levels and looks for a double leg takedown. O Neal tries to avoid it but Infect manages to keep hold of a leg and drag O Neal to the ground. O Neal escapes though and pops straight back up to his feet.
Infect takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.
Infect shoots in looking for a takedown but O Neal manages to keep the fight standing, pushing Infect's face into the canvas for good measure before circling away.
Shaquille O Neal has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of FTWinfected Infect.

O Neal clinches.
Infect blocks an uppercut.
Infect tries to pull guard but O Neal won't allow it.
Infect blocks a punch to the side of the head.
Infect jumps guard but O Neal turns him against the cage and keeps the fight standing.
O Neal lands a shoulder strike that jolts his opponent's head backwards.
Infect tries for a takedown but O Neal manages to get underhooks.
O Neal misses with some punches.
O Neal lands with a short shot to the head.
Infect blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
O Neal misses with a short punch on the inside.
A body shot lands from O Neal.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
O Neal has Infect pushed against the cage.
Infect wants to break free but O Neal has control.
O Neal lands a nice shot to the body.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Infect blocks a couple of punches on the inside.
O Neal is clearly stalling here... Pick up the pace son.
O Neal presses Infect against the cage and delivers a mid-strength body shot.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
O Neal fails to land with a short punch on the inside.
Infect prevents a body shot from O Neal.
O Neal lands a hook that snaps the head of Infect backwards.
O Neal lands a body punch in the clinch.
Infect is trying to break the clinch but O Neal is controlling him.
O Neal taking a breather.
Infect is working for takedown but O Neal is calmly controlling the position for now.
A shot in the inside from O Neal.
O Neal lands a body shot in the clinch.
O Neal displaying some good clinch control by pressing Infect up against the cage.
O Neal seems to have come into the fight with the intention of avoiding any damage in the clinch, rather than actually showing any aggression.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
O Neal lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of Infect backwards.
O Neal tries a body shot but Infect blocks it.
O Neal tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
O Neal can't find room to land a body shot as Infect controls the action.
The crowd applaud the fighters efforts here as the round comes to an end.
Infect tries to pull guard but O Neal won't allow it.
O Neal stalling in the clinch.
FTWinfected Infect has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
O Neal misses with a hook to the ribs.

And that's the end of the fight!
Shaquille O Neal showed his dominance in that final round.
Well O Neal has outscored his opponent in every aspect of the fight today. Only a scarily incompetent judge or two will keep him from a well deserved win... Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Jeff Smith scores the fight for Shaquille O Neal!
Judge Colin Fray scores the fight for Shaquille O Neal!
Judge Josh West scores the fight for Shaquille O Neal!

Shaquille O Neal wins by unanimous decision!
A relieved looking Shaquille O Neal thanked the fans for their support and gave the usual line about them being amazing. They seemed to believe that he actually meant it.