PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight kickboxing rules bout between Jon Hess (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Bruce The Glow (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Hess kept the crowd waiting but all that was forgotten when his ring entrance music started. The incomparable musical genius that is Curl Of The Burl. Jon Hess has a significant reach advantage - let's see if he can make it count.

Hess
vs
The Glow

201 cm
21
280 lbs
9 - 1 - 0

190 cm
21
270 lbs
5 - 3 - 0

Lethal high kicks
Granite chin

Lethal high kicks
Good gas tank

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 5 rounds, for the super heavyweight championship of the world!
Introducing the champion to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 9 - 1 - 0, fighting out of Rio de Janeiro, Jon Hess!
And introducing the challenger to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 5 - 3 - 0, fighting out of Los Angeles, Bruce The Glow!
The judges for this bout are Don Winkell, and Jack Bonds.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Hess throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
The Glow blocks the body kick.
A cross from The Glow lands.
The Glow dances in quickly and lands a nice inside leg kick on Hess. That did some damage!
The Glow connects with a body shot that sends Hess's belly button to the back.
Hess misses with a wild combination.
Hess comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range.
The Glow avoids the body shot from Hess.
Hess swinging wildly here.
Hess fakes a jab and throws a low kick but The Glow checks it well.
Hess uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by The Glow.
The Glow throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Well, he's not going to score with shots like that. A lazy body kick attempt from The Glow.
Hess looks for the body kick but The Glow saw that one coming.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Hess lands with an uppercut that bounces The Glow off the ropes and back into range.
Hess thows a body shot but no joy.
Hess lands the left hand.
The Glow fakes a jab and scores with a low kick.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Hess tries to close the distance and clinch but The Glow swats him to one side with an open hand palm strike and circles away.
The Glow moves out of range of the strikes.
The Glow misses with a two punch combination.
The Glow avoids a lazy jab quite easily.
Hess moves out of range of the body kick.
Hess scores with a jab to the body.
A jab from Hess does it's job there.
Hess uses some good footwork to avoid the body shot by The Glow.
Hess uses good footwork to avoid the strikes from The Glow.
Hess shapes like he's going to throw a leg kick but settles back down.

Hess moves into range and clinches up with The Glow.
Hess is working The Glow over against the ropes.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Hess stalling in the clinch but The Glow improves position.

Hess breaks from the clinch.
Oooooooooooh, not good. A low kick from Hess lands where it shouldn't have, right in the... well, you know what he did? He kicked him in the penis. He's injured, injured bad. The referee sends both fighters to their corners and The Glow has 5 minutes to recover. He's OK now though... a thumbs up from The Glow and we're back underway with a touch of gloves.
Hess swings for the body but The Glow moves out of range.
The Glow checks a leg kick nicely.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The Glow walks into a straight right hand from Hess.
Hess attempts a low kick but it misses it's target.
The Glow misses the shot to the body.
The Glow avoids the body shot from Hess.
Hess throws a low kick but it's checked well by The Glow.
Hess avoids the body shot from The Glow.
Hess moves into range and lands a nice body kick.
Hess feints and then cracks The Glow's leading leg with a nice low kick. He's obviously looking to slow The Glow down.
The Glow looks winded!
The Glow misses with an attempted mid kick.
Hess misses with a kick to the body.
Hess lands a powerful looking uppercut that connected with his opponent's jaw.
Hess is using his height advantage well here, landing a good percentage of his punches.
The Glow's hands are dropping dangerously low here and Hess connects clean with a right hook that sends him down to one knee! The Glow scrambles back to his feet.
Hess looks for the body kick but The Glow saw that one coming.
The Glow falls off balance throwing a combination
and Hess cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
The Glow throws a wild body kick that Hess sees coming a mile off.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
The Glow misses with a kick to the body.
Hess connects with a body shot.
Hess scores with a leg kick.
Hess connects with a leg kick. He turned his hip over nicely there.
The Glow loads up on a big right hand but Hess slips the punch.
The Glow is looking to chop away at Hess's legs.
Hess fakes the leg kick and cracks The Glow in the body.
Hess fakes with a right hand and throws a good leg kick, right into the thigh. That had to hurt The Glow.
Fantastic stuff here - a very entertaining period of action, which has drawn cheers from the crowd.
Some bone on bone action there as The Glow checks a low kick. Luckily it wasn't a particularly hard one.
The Glow takes a jab right on the nose. That must have hurt but he shrugs his shoulders and looks to return the favor.
The Glow takes a hook to the side of the head. I wonder if that's got his ears ringing.
Hess with a body punch. A glancing blow.

Hess has managed to clinch.
Hess is working The Glow over against the ropes.
Hess displaying some good clinch control by pressing The Glow up against the ropes.
Hess digs a right hand underneath The Glow's ribcage. The Glow let out a lung full of air as it connected.

That's four minutes gone in the round.

Hess pushes off and circles away, back to the middle of the mat.
Hess scores with a kick to the midsection.
Hess connects with a leg kick. He turned his hip over nicely there.
Hess swings and misses with a hook to the body.
Hess throws a nice outside leg kick.
Boom, another hit is landed. "You're gunna get knocked out" taunts Hess, as that shot connected.
The Glow moves out of range as Hess throws a body kick.
Hess keeps his opponent at a distance with a nice jab.

Hess drops a shoulder and throws a biiiig uppercut that drops The Glow onto his butt! The Glow pops straight back to his feet to convince the referee that he's OK to continue.
Hess throws a nice outside leg kick.

Hess connects with a beautiful left hand that drops The Glow onto his butt! The Glow bounces straight back up though - he's OK. After the ref checks him out, we're back to the action.

The Glow is rocked!
Hess is really peppering his opponent's head with punches.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Both fighters circling a little - Hess finishes the exchange with a kick to the body.
Hess connects with a picture perfect right hand that knocks The Glow out cold! This one is over in a flash!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 4:55 of round 1, we have a winner by way of KO (Punch). Jon Hess!
Jon Hess retains his super heavyweight title!
A very excited looking Jon Hess made sure he remembered to thank all the fans both in the arena and on the internet. He said all the coolest people spend all day on MMA websites, which got a big reaction.