PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a super heavyweight kickboxing rules bout between Shitty Bill (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Dave Stimpson (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Over to our ring announcer for the fighter introductions!

Bill
vs
Stimpson

225 cm
31
300 lbs
8 - 3 - 0

194 cm
28
215 lbs
9 - 3 - 0

World class boxer
Insanely flexible

World class boxer
Good gas tank

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the super heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 8 - 3 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Shitty Bill!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 9 - 3 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Dave Stimpson!
The judges for this bout are Hugh Johnson, Bruno Hogan and Eliza Hachem.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Stimpson swings widly with a right hand
and Bill counters with a lovely straight right hand!

It looks like Dave Stimpson has been cut.
Some wild striking there from Stimpson.
Stimpson misses with a few strikes there.
Stimpson looks to land a body kick but Bill moved away.
Bill slips a jab and a cross from Stimpson.
A solid leg kick lands there for Bill.
Bill fakes low and throws an overhand right that catches Stimpson on the side of the head.
Stimpson misses with a double jab
and Bill counters with a stiff right hand.
Dave Stimpson seems to be the more aggressive standup fighter in this bout.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Bill slips a jab and a cross from Stimpson.
Some wild striking there from Stimpson.
A swing and a miss from Stimpson.

That's one minute gone in the round.
A low kick from Stimpson misses
and Bill connects with a straight left hand counter down the middle.
Bill showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Stimpson.
Stimpson swinging wildly here.
A head kick by Stimpson misses
and Bill cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.
Bill lands a vicious shot with the stealth of a sniper and the strength of a viper. Are vipers that strong? I can think of lots of things that are stronger than a viper - not many rhyme with sniper though.
Stimpson lands a jab to the nose.
Bill is using his height advantage well here, landing a good percentage of his punches.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Bill is on the wrong end of a nice combination from Stimpson.
Stimpson throws a leg kick
and Bill counters with a stiff right hand.
Stimpson throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Bill dodges the punch combination from Stimpson.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Stimpson thows a leg kick but Bill checks it
enabling Bill to counter with a crisp jab.
Stimpson staying out of range there.
Stimpson misses with a jab, cross combination.
Stimpson swinging wildly here.
Stimpson throws a leg kick but Bill checks it.
Bill throws a mid kick that lands with a slap.
A combination from Stimpson does no damage.
Stimpson missing with a left hand there. Bill was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
Bill is using his reach advantage well here, landing the more effective single shots from range.
Bill keeping his hands up high there, blocking the jab from Stimpson.
Stimpson tries to land with a swinging hook to the body but Bill was well out of range. Poor timing from Stimpson.
Stimpson misses with a body shot.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Stimpson throws a jab but it's blocked by Bill.
Stimpson throws a series of punches but Bill moves out of range.
Bill slips a jab and a cross from Stimpson.
Bill lands with a straight right. Stimpson didn't see that one coming.
Bill avoids the head kick by Stimpson.
Stimpson misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Bill blocks a low kick nicely.
Stimpson walks into a straight right hand from Bill.
Stimpson is really struggling to land any decent head shots against his taller opponent.
Bill takes a punch to the jaw and another one to the bread basket.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Stimpson misses with a jab, cross combination.
Bill is really head hunting here, hardly looking to strike to the body at all.
Stimpson throws a combination. Bill tries to block but a couple of punches get through.
Stimpson defending well as Bill loads up on a big left hand.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Sloppy strikes from Stimpson. Those never looked like landing.
Stimpson throws a series of punches but Bill moves out of range.
Jab, cross, leg kick. Nice combination by Stimpson!
Bill scores with a straight right hand, right through his opponent's guard.
Stimpson throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Stimpson misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Stimpson throws a nice looking combination but Bill bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
A punch lands to the side of Stimpson 's head but he takes it in his stride.

That has opened up Dave Stimpson's cut even more.
Stimpson looks to land a combination. Bill sees it coming but can only parry a couple of the shots.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Stimpson with a jab.
Stimpson misses with a wild combination.
Bill fakes a jab and then connects with a hook.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Shitty Bill dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Dave Stimpson's cut.
The minute break is over - no more time for sponges and pep talks - back to the action!

Bill throws a nice head kick!
Bill clobbers Stimpson with an overhand right that has the crowd gasping. That made a horrendous noise.
Stimpson misses with a jab, cross combination.
Stimpson swings wildly with a couple of big hooks
and Bill counters with a good right hand that lands right on the jaw.
Stimpson throws a nice looking combination but Bill bobs and weaves to avoid any damage.
Stimpson throws a head kick that misses and slips in the process. He scrambles back to his feet and the fighters circle.
Stimpson swinging wildly here.
Bill throws a hook to the side of Stimpson's head but Stimpson sees it coming and ducks under it beautifully.
Stimpson throws a right and a left that Bill avoids nicely.
Bill walks into a straight right hand from Stimpson.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Bill showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Stimpson.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Bill connects with a nice looking jab.
Stimpson tried to score with a low kick but Bill checks it.
Stimpson throws a body punch but Bill moves out of range.
Some wild striking there from Stimpson.
Stimpson moves out of range of the strikes.
Bill uses good footwork to get in and out, landing a nice hook.
Stimpson takes one on the chin but keeps coming.
Bill missing with a left hand there. Stimpson was out of range so wasted energy throwing that one.
Bill showing good head movement there, avoiding the strikes from Stimpson.
Stimpson throws a jab, cross combination which is slipped
and Bill counters with a lovely straight right hand!

That's two minutes gone in the round.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Well, he's not going to score with shots like that. A lazy body kick attempt from Stimpson.
Bill dodges the punch combination from Stimpson.
A big left from Bill misses.
Stimpson closes the distance looking to clinch
and Bill counters with a kick to the head that grazes his opponent. Stimpson is lucky that one didn't land flush.
Stimpson throws a wild combination but nothing lands.
Stimpson walks into a jab.
Bill avoids a lazy jab quite easily.
Stimpson swings away but doesn't land with a series of punches.

Stimpson moves into the clinch.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Bill is trying to break free.
Bill tries to break the clinch but Stimpson is controlling the position.
Stimpson is trying to break the clinch but Bill has him pressed against the ropes.

Stimpson manages to break the clinch.
Stimpson rushes forward with a series of wild hooks but Bill moves out of range and avoids them all easily.
A swing and a miss from Stimpson.
Stimpson misses with the body kick
and Bill counters with a low kick, right behind Stimpson 's knee.
Stimpson throws a right and a left that both miss.
Stimpson is breathing heavily.
Bill checks a leg kick.
Stimpson falls off balance throwing a combination
and Bill cracks him with a counter punch right on the button.

The cut above Dave Stimpson's eye is starting to cause him problems now.
Stimpson misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
A combination from Stimpson does no damage.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Bill blocks a low kick nicely.
Stimpson jabbing away but nothing is landing.
Stimpson misses with a right hand
and Bill counters with a leg kick that reverborates around the arena.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Stimpson misses with a jab and misses with a cross straight after too.
Stimpson throws a decent looking leg kick but it doesn't land clean.
Bill lands a lovely overhand right.
Stimpson throws a right hand that Bill ducks under and follows up with a left that Bill also avoids with ease.
Bill looking to take his opponent's legs away with the low kicks.
Dave Stimpson is looking to throw some combinations by the looks of things.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
A swing and a miss from Bill.
Stimpson misses with a series of wild punches.
Bill ducks under an overhand right and circles away with a smile on his face.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Shitty Bill dominated that second round.
The cut man is working on Dave Stimpson's cut.
The minute break is over - no more time for sponges and pep talks - back to the action! So, we enter the final round. Let's see if either fighter can bring us a finish, or whether we're going to the judges scorecards.

Bill tries to work over Stimpson's front leg with a kick but Stimpson checks it.
Bill slips a jab and a cross from Stimpson.
Bill misses with a low kick as Stimpson jumps back.
Stimpson misses with a low kick.
Stimpson has a pretty nasty looking mouse under his right eye.
Stimpson throws a left and a right that both miss
and Bill counters with a crisp hook to the side of the head.
Stimpson throws out a loose jab but Bill uses good head movement to avoid it.
Stimpson will need to tighten up his combinations if he doesn't want to gas himself out, swinging at thin air.
Nice shot lands for Bill.
Stimpson walks straight into an uppercut. Luckily it didn't land flush.
Stimpson throws a jab, cross combination which is slipped
and Bill counters nicely by changing levels and landing a hook to the body.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Bill cracks a nice hook into Stimpson's ribs.
Stimpson takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Stimpson tries to clinch but Bill is having none of it.
That kick from Stimpson tenderised Bill's leg. Bill is trying to keep his angry face on.
The fighters circling - Stimpson throws out the jab but it was never going to land.
Stimpson throws a combination but comes up with nothing but fresh air.
Bill throws out a token jab with nothing on it.
Stimpson takes a shot to the body in his stride.
Stimpson takes a thudding leg kick, right into the meat of the thigh.
Bill stooping low to avoid any incoming strikes and then lunges in with an uppercut come cross that lands flush.
Stimpson on the wrong end of an overhand right that came out of nowhere.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Stimpson looks to score with a combo but nothing lands.
Stimpson throws a jab, cross combination which is slipped
and as Stimpson looks to reset his feet, Bill counters with a string of precision punches, right on the button, sending Stimpson crashing to the canvas! Stimpson is in big trouble here! The referee has started the count but Stimpson is so wobbly that the ref has given up the count at 6 - he's called the bout off! Bill is your winner!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 2:57 of round 3, we have a winner by way of TKO (Punches). Shitty Bill!
Shitty Bill very nearly forgot to thank Alpha-Male Nutritional Supplements (q160) amongst all the excitement of his win but just as the interview came to a close, he screamed their name. Hopefully he'll get a few nice freebies in the mail as a thank you.