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PBP Commentary |
Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Bert Starius (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Kim Jong Un (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Jong Un has chosen DPRKorean National Anthem as his entrance music. Kim Jong Un has the better chin. Will he look to stand and bang today?
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| 180 cm
20
230 lbs
1 - 1 - 0 |
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178 cm
28
239 lbs
6 - 9 - 0 |
BJJ Blue Belt
Excellent boxer
Very strong |
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BJJ Brown Belt
Counter fighter
Determined |
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Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of
1 - 1 - 0, fighting out of Amsterdam, Bert Starius!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of
6 - 9 - 0, fighting out of Amsterdam, Kim Jong Un!
The judges for this bout are Albert Achterberg, Paulsen Ambrosius and Aafke Stam.
The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Starius listening to his corner there, landing a nice uppercut.
Starius fakes low and throws an overhand right that catches Jong Un on the side of the head.
Jong Un displays some good footwork, moving neatly out of range as Starius throws out the jab.
Starius clobbers Jong Un with an overhand right that has the crowd gasping. That made a horrendous noise.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Starius stuffs a takedown. It's all about dictating where the fight takes place and Starius wants it to stay on the feet.
Starius moves into range and clinches up with Jong Un.
Starius lands a shoulder strike that jolts his opponent's head backwards.
Jong Un tries to pull guard but Starius won't allow it.
Jong Un takes a shot to the head.
Jong Un is trying to slow down the pace of the fight but Starius is keeping busy.
Starius lands with a short head shot on the inside.
Jong Un looking for a takedown.
Bert Starius has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Kim Jong Un.
A nice right hand lands inside from Starius.
Starius manages to get underhooks and slows down the pace for a moment.
Jong Un trying to control the position but instead, Starius has worked for underhooks and has pushed Jong Un into the cage.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Jong Un fails to pull guard.
Starius lands a nice shot to the body.
Starius lands with a left to the head.
A body shot lands from Starius.
Starius lands a nice shot to the body.
Jong Un looks winded!
Jong Un stalling in the clinch but Starius improves position.
Starius throws a hook to the body. More of an arm punch but it's all scoring with the judges.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Starius stays in close to his opponent and throws a right hand to the body.
Jong Un is trying to pull guard but Starius turns him against the cage and we stay in the clinch.
Starius content to slow the pace in the clinch.
Starius lands with a short head shot on the inside.
That's two minutes gone in the round.
Starius pushes Jong Un back against the cage and unloads with a body punch.
Starius has Jong Un pressed against the cage.
A short uppercut from Starius.
Starius lands a hook that snaps the head of Jong Un backwards.
Starius working some nice short punches in the clinch.
A shot in the inside from Starius.
The pace really dropping off here, momentarily.
Starius lands a right uppercut that snaps the head of Jong Un backwards.
Starius lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage.
Jong Un has had enough of the clinch but Starius keeps him there for the moment.
Starius lands a left hand.
That's three minutes gone in the round.
Starius lands a nice uppercut.
With the fighters clinched against the cage, Starius creates a bit of distance for himself and scores with a nice uppercut.
A short right from Starius.
Jong Un tries to score a body lock takedown but Starius shows good agility there to stay on his feet.
Jong Un fails to pull the fight into his guard.
Starius leaning his opponent against the cage.
Starius lands with a good tight uppercut to the head.
Starius lands with a quick shot inside that doesn't really do much damage.
Starius stalling in the clinch.
Jong Un is trying to pull guard but being pressed up against the cage enables Starius to keep the fight standing.
Jong Un pulls Starius into guard.
The ref warns both fighters not to hold the cage as they work up against the meshing.
The referee wants the fighters to be more active or he's going to reset them on the feet.
Starius is just sitting in guard, looking to avoid any submissions.
Jong Un is throwing his legs up, looking for submissions. Starius is aware though and is defending well.
That's four minutes gone in the round.
Starius is taking a break and basically stalling. The referee will not allow him to do that for long.
Jong Un had isolated an arm as going for a kimura. Starius defends it easily.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Jong Un throwing his legs up looking for a triangle.
Starius is intent on slowing down the pace of the fight, simply looking to control.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Starius trying to control the position from guard on top but Jong Un is wriggling around, looking for whatever he can.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.
Bert Starius dominated that round.
The cut man is working on Kim Jong Un's cut.
That's time! Starius's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight.
Starius moves into the clinch.
Jong Un jumps guard but Starius stands there with Jong Un around his waist. Jong Un gives up and drops back to his feet. We remain in the clinch.
A short right hand to the side of the head by Starius.
Jong Un tries to jump guard but he falls flat on his backside. Starius smiles and moves away.
The crowd cheers as Starius lands an impressive looking overhand right. Jong Un doesn't seem phased though.
Starius gets to the clinch - let's see what his plan is here.
Jong Un tries to jump guard but he falls flat on his backside. Starius smiles and moves away.
Bert Starius has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Kim Jong Un.
Jong Un closes the distance and clinches up with Starius, looking for a takedown. Jong Un pushes Starius against the cage but Starius circles to the side and manages to break the clinch.
Starius fails to land with the punch combination there - jab, cross, hook, miss, miss, miss.
That's one minute gone in the round.
Nice body punch from Starius.
A lazy left from Starius finds it's target.
Starius lands a big uppercut and Jong Un crumbles to the floor! The ref thinks about stopping the fight but Jong Un looks OK. Starius waves Jong Un back to his feet!
Jong Un is rocked!
That has opened up Kim Jong Un's cut even more.
Jong Un is breathing heavily.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Starius throws a pinpoint strike between Jong Un's hands that connects right on the jaw and sends Jong Un crashing to the floor! He's out before he even hits the mat and Starius scores a great knockout victory!
Ladies and gentlemen, after 1:19 of round 2, we have a winner by way of KO (Punch). Bert Starius!
In defeat, Kim Jong Un stepped up to the mic, saying 'We will strike America with great impunity, warning them by fax. Our weapons are the greatest in the world and our penises are huge. '.
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| S |
C
A |
G |
S |
C
B |
G |
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S |
C |
G |
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energy
A | B |
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hype
A | B |
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pop
A | B |
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mgr
A | B |
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FIGHT
RATING
100% |
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