PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a heavyweight MMA rules bout between Juris Dicktion (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Gigantor Ubereem (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Ubereem is bouncing up and down as he enters the arena, backed by -. Both fighters really staring each other down here, as Gigantor Ubereem enters the cage!

Dicktion
vs
Ubereem

180 cm
30
260 lbs
11 - 12 - 0

200 cm
35
276 lbs
19 - 20 - 0

BJJ Brown Belt
World class MT
Insanely flexible

Good wrestler
Lethal high kicks
Heavy handed

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 11 - 12 - 0, fighting out of Helsinki, Juris Dicktion!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 19 - 20 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Gigantor Ubereem!
The judges for this bout are Robert Twigg, Cecil Peabody and Daniel Franklin.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Dicktion throws a feint and then finishes with a kick to the body.
Dicktion throws a head kick that half lands.

It looks like Gigantor Ubereem has been cut.

Dicktion forces Ubereem back against the cage and clinches.
Dicktion throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Ubereem blocks it with crossed arms.
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but he's missed.
We've seen a great period of action over the last minute or so - credit to both fighters for going all out!
Ubereem trying to land knees to the body.
Ubereem lands a hook to the body. It's hard to tell if that hurt Dicktion or not.

Ubereem's corner calls for him to break the clinch, which he does.
Ubereem smiles there as he lands a nice right hand right on the button.

It looks like Juris Dicktion has been cut.
Dicktion lands a head kick. Ubereem smiles back at him and beckons him forward.
Dicktion buckles his opponent's knee momentarily with a nice leg kick.
Dicktion has been working on his boxing with his coaches at Tres Puntos FC in the buildup to the fight.

Ubereem gets tackled into the cage by Dicktion. Dicktion maintains the clinch.
Dicktion tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
Dicktion looking to throw knees to the head but Ubereem is blocking nicely.
Dicktion is trying to wear down his opponent with knees to the body.
Dicktion throws a knee to the head but misses.
Dicktion struggles to land a body shot inside as Ubereem controls his hands.
Ubereem is trying to stall.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks it.
Dicktion misses with a knee to the head.
Dicktion throws a knee to the head but misses.
Ubereem has had enough of the clinch but Dicktion keeps him there for the moment.
Dicktion working Ubereem over with knees to the body.
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but he's missed.
Ubereem can't find room to land a body shot as Dicktion controls the action.
Ubereem fails to pull guard.
Dicktion prevents a body shot from Ubereem.
Dicktion tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
Dicktion tries to land a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks with his arms.
Dicktion throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Ubereem blocks it with crossed arms.
Ubereem missing with knees to the body.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Ubereem managing to block the knees to the body from Dicktion.
Dicktion lands a knee to the head there! That was nasty!
Dicktion tries to land a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks with his arms.
Dicktion landing knees to the head.
Dicktion misses with a knee strike.
Ubereem stalling here - the referee won't stand for too much of that.
Dicktion throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Ubereem blocks it with crossed arms.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Ubereem's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
Stalling in the clinch from Ubereem.
Dicktion tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Dicktion using the Thai plumb to throw knees but Ubereem has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
Dicktion scores a nice knee to the body.
Dicktion can't find room to land a body shot as Ubereem controls the action.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Dicktion lands a knee to the head.
Dicktion lands a nice knee to the body.
Ubereem looks winded!
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks it.
Dicktion throws a knee to the head but misses.
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks it.
Dicktion tries to land knees in the clinch but Ubereem avoids the damage to the body.
Ubereem avoiding damage as Dicktion throws knees to the body.
Ubereem wants to break free. God knows he wants to breaaaak freeee.
Dicktion is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. Ubereem is defending well for now.
Ubereem blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.
Dicktion misses with a knee strike.
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks it.
Dicktion misses with a knee strike.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Ubereem blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.
Dicktion swings wildly with an uppercut but Ubereem uses good head movement to avoid it.
Dicktion doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Ubereem wants to get back to striking at distance but Dicktion won't allow it.
Dicktion scores with a knee to the head.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but he's missed.
Dicktion keeps the fight in the clinch, despite Ubereem's efforts to push away.
Dicktion tries to land knees in the clinch but Ubereem avoids the damage to the body.
Knees to the body from Dicktion.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Dicktion lands with a right to the head.
Dicktion can't find room to land a body shot as Ubereem controls the action.
Ubereem avoiding damage as Dicktion throws knees to the body.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Juris Dicktion dominated that round.
Both fighters have cut men working on them during the interval.
The minute break is over - no more time for sponges and pep talks - back to the action!

Ubereem moves into the clinch successfully.
Dicktion misses with a punch to the body.
Ubereem drops to a knee looking for a takedown but Dicktion gets the underhooks and prevents it.

The fighters are starting to perspire pretty heavily.
Ubereem breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.

Dicktion rushes Ubereem and presses him up against the cage.
Juris Dicktion has scored more points in the clinch so far.
Ubereem crunches a lovely knee into Dicktion's ribcage.
Dicktion managing to block the knees to the body from Ubereem.

Ubereem breaks the clinch and we return to the middle of the mat.

Ubereem tries to keep at a distance but Dicktion has taken the fight into the clinch.
Dicktion doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Dicktion connects with a knee to the head.
Dicktion tries to throw a body punch but Ubereem avoids it by throwing Dicktion back against the cage.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Dicktion utilising his Muay Thai to score with a knee to the body.
Ubereem is breathing heavily.
Dicktion landing knees to the body.
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Dicktion lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of Ubereem backwards.
Dicktion is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Ubereem can do to turn this around?
Dicktion doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Dicktion landing knees to the body.
Ubereem on the defensive, avoiding the knees to the body.
Dicktion tries to land a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks with his arms.
Dicktion is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. Ubereem is defending well for now.
Dicktion with the Thai clinch. He's looking to land a big knee but he's not managed it this time.
Ubereem on the defensive, avoiding the knees to the body.
Dicktion misses with a knee to the head.
Dicktion using the Thai plumb to throw knees but Ubereem has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
Dicktion misses with a punch on the inside.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Dicktion with an attempt at a knee that misses.
Dicktion misses with a knee to the head.
Dicktion with the Thai clinch. He's looking to land a big knee but he's not managed it this time.
Ubereem goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
With the fighters up against the cage, Ubereem throws an elbow but misses.
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but he's missed.
Ubereem takes a knee to the side of the body.
Dicktion is working Ubereem over against the cage.
Dicktion lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage.
Dicktion missing with knees to the body.
Dicktion tries to land a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks with his arms.
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks it.
Dicktion landing some nice looking knees to the body.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Dicktion is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. Ubereem is defending well for now.
Dicktion tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
Dicktion misses with a knee to the head.
Ubereem is leaning against Dicktion and scores with a nice uppercut to the body.
Ubereem jumps guard but Dicktion stands there with Ubereem around his waist. Ubereem gives up and drops back to his feet. We remain in the clinch.
Dicktion scores a nice knee to the body.
A right handed body shot lands from Dicktion.
Ubereem takes a knee right on the jaw!
Dicktion throws a knee to the head but misses.
Dicktion with the Thai clinch. He's looking to land a big knee but he's not managed it this time.
Ubereem blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
A quick uppercut on the inside from Dicktion.
Dicktion putting his Muay Thai to good use. He has Ubereem in a tight clinch and is doing some damage with knees to the body.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks it.
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but he's missed.
Ubereem jumps guard but his hands slip and he falls flat on his back. Well, he's made himself look a right mug there, as Dicktion walks away with a smile on his face. Ubereem gets slowly back to his feet and shakes his head.
Juris Dicktion has stuffed three takedown attempts in the round now. That's going to take a lot out of Gigantor Ubereem.

Dicktion clinches.
Ubereem tries to pull guard but Dicktion forces him back to his feet, against the cage.
Dicktion lands with a right to the head.
Dicktion scores with a hook to the body.
Kneeeeees! The crowd are calling for knees to the body. Dicktion obliges.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Dicktion throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Ubereem blocks it with crossed arms.
Dicktion lands a body punch.
Dicktion with an attempt at a knee that misses.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Juris Dicktion dominated that second round.
Both fighters have cut men working on them during the interval.
That's time! Back to the action! This is the final round!

Dicktion thumps Ubereem with a low kick.

Dicktion instigates a clinch.
Dicktion misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Dicktion tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
Dicktion throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Ubereem blocks it with crossed arms.
Dicktion throws a vicious knee straight up the middle but Ubereem blocks it with crossed arms.
Dicktion managing to block the knees to the body from Ubereem.
Ubereem wants a takedown.
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but he's missed.
Dicktion lands on the inside with an uppercut.
Dicktion misses with a knee strike.
Dicktion misses with a knee strike.
Both fighters are breathing heavily.
Ubereem managing to block the knees to the body from Dicktion.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Dicktion.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Dicktion lands a body punch in the clinch.
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks it.
Knees in the clinch landing for Dicktion.
Kneeeeees! The crowd are calling for knees to the body. Dicktion obliges.
Dicktion utilising his Muay Thai to score with a knee to the body.
Dicktion lands a nice knee to the body.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Dicktion lands a knee to the head there! That was nasty!
Dicktion lands a shot to the body.
Dicktion lands a knee to the head.
Ubereem on the defensive, avoiding the knees to the body.
Dicktion lands a knee to the head.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Dicktion throws a knee to the head but misses.
Ubereem misses with a shot to the kidneys.
Dicktion using the Thai plumb to throw knees but Ubereem has his back arched nicely, preventing the strike.
Dicktion doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Ubereem blocking some punches.
Dicktion lands a shot to the body.
Ubereem blocks an uppercut.
Ubereem tries a body shot but Dicktion blocks it.
Dicktion lands a right hand that snaps the head of Ubereem backwards.
Dicktion lands a nice knee to the body.
Dicktion tries to land a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks with his arms.
Dicktion scores with a shoulder strike.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
A short left from Dicktion.
Dicktion tries to land a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks with his arms.
Dicktion misses with a knee strike.
Dicktion is defending well against a takedown attempt.
Dicktion tries to land a knee to the head but misses.
Dicktion pushes Ubereem back against the cage and lands a hook to the side of the head.
Ubereem blocks a knee to the body. He'll have a nicely bruised forearm in the morning.
Dicktion misses the knee to the body. Nice hip positioning from Ubereem.
Dicktion tries a knee to the head but Ubereem blocks it.
Ubereem struggles to land a body shot inside as Dicktion controls his hands.

Ubereem pulls guard.
The referee looks like he's ready to step in and stand the fighters back up.
Dicktion trying to pass the guard. He's being very persistent here but Ubereem manages to land a sweep and now he's on top!

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Ubereem trying to control but Dicktion is working from the bottom.
Ubereem is in a good position here but he's just trying to control... And he's not even managing to do that successfully.
Dicktion working the defensive guard well to avoid strikes from Ubereem.
Ubereem working in close now, lands a nice elbow to the side of Dicktion's head.
Gigantor Ubereem has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!
Juris Dicktion is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
The crowd are going absolutely nuts as the round comes to an end - what a fantastic round of action!
Ubereem pushes down on Dicktion's leg and manages to get into half guard.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Dicktion gets back to full guard.

And that's the end of the fight!
Juris Dicktion showed his dominance in that final round.
Well I reckon that's a shut out for Dicktion, winning every round. Will the judges agree? They are the ones who matter, even if they are often depressingly incompetent. Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Robert Twigg scores the fight 30:27
Judge Cecil Peabody scores the fight 30:27
Judge Daniel Franklin scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Juris Dicktion!
In his post fight interview, Juris Dicktion started talking himself up. Luckily his charisma kept the crowd on side and gave him a good reception.