PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between Maxwell Keiser (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Phukyorselvf Uzannavabizch (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Keiser comes to the cage accompanied by AC/DC - Thunderstruck. Uzannavabizch has chosen Brandon Loveladdy's band WE ARE THE CHOSEN : BREAKING THE KARMIC CYCLE as his entrance music, which hasn't gone down very well with the crowd. Maxwell Keiser is staring across the cage at his opponent, tweaking his nipples... Tweaking his own nipples that is.

Keiser
vs
Uzannavabizch

182 cm
29
209 lbs
15 - 13 - 0

189 cm
35
208 lbs
30 - 14 - 1

Great wrestler
World class boxer
Cardio machine

Good wrestler
World class boxer
Good gas tank

Just Fight (Everything 7$)

AnonymouS
Just Fight (Everything 7$)

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the light heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 15 - 13 - 0, fighting out of Las Vegas, Maxwell Keiser!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 30 - 14 - 1, fighting out of Montreal, Phukyorselvf Uzannavabizch!
The judges for this bout are Gwen Towbar, Alan Glass and Cecil Peabody.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Keiser with a poor takedown
and Uzannavabizch counters with a three punch combination, finished off with a leg kick. Nice work.
Keiser on the receiving end of a decent leg kick there by Uzannavabizch. Uzannavabizch obviously looking to wear him down.
Keiser takes one to the side of the head.
Uzannavabizch throws a hook but Keiser blocks it.
Keiser misses with a jab, cross combination.
Uzannavabizch fakes with a right hand and throws a good leg kick, right into the thigh. That had to hurt Keiser.
Uzannavabizch drops Keiser with a straight left! Oh this is bad for Keiser! Uzannavabizch dives in and starts dropping bombs - the referee has no choice but to step in and save him!

Ladies and gentlemen, after 0:25 of round 1, we have a winner by way of TKO (Strikes). Phukyorselvf Uzannavabizch!
A relieved looking Phukyorselvf Uzannavabizch thanked the fans for their support and gave the usual line about them being amazing. They seemed to believe that he actually meant it.