PBP Commentary

Coming up we have a light heavyweight MMA rules bout between Orville Redenbacher (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class) and Jackson Thomas (ranked 0 p4p, 0 weight class). Redenbacher's entrance music is Danger Zone. A fine choice. Thomas is bouncing up and down as he enters the arena, backed by Patroit's Anthem. Orville Redenbacher is staring across the cage at his opponent, tweaking his nipples... Tweaking his own nipples that is.

Redenbacher
vs
Thomas

190 cm
37
220 lbs
39 - 15 - 1

189 cm
34
213 lbs
16 - 10 - 1

Good wrestling
World class boxer
Very quick

Good wrestler
World class MT
Granite chin

Ladies and gentlemen. This fight is 3 rounds, in the light heavyweight division.
Introducing the fighter to my left, fighting out of the red corner.
With a record of 39 - 15 - 1, fighting out of Amsterdam, Orville Redenbacher!
And introducing the fighter to my right, fighting out of the blue corner.
With a record of 16 - 10 - 1, fighting out of London, Jackson Thomas!
The judges for this bout are Robert Twigg, Gwen Towbar and Stewart Dunkirk.

The bell rings for round one and we are underway!
Thomas throws a leg kick that misses.
Redenbacher moves out of range as Thomas throws a body kick.
Thomas throws a head kick that misses.
Redenbacher throws a body kick but he was well out of range there.
Thomas thows a left - swing and a miss!
Thomas comes forward and lands a shot to the body, then darts back out of range.
Redenbacher avoids a low kick by using good footwork.
The sound of bone on bone echoes around the arena as Redenbacher checks a leg kick.
Jab by Redenbacher.
Redenbacher checks a leg kick.
Well, he's not going to score with shots like that. A lazy body kick attempt from Redenbacher.
Redenbacher scores with a sloppy punch to the body. Not much technique there but it did the business.
Thomas lands with a right hand.
Redenbacher lands a nice looking body kick.
Thomas ducks under an overhand right and circles away with a smile on his face.
Redenbacher dances in quickly and lands a nice inside leg kick on Thomas. That did some damage!
The crowd are loving this. Great action here.
Redenbacher fails in his attempt to clinch.
Redenbacher fails with an attempt to clinch.
A jab from Thomas finds it's way through Redenbacher's defenses.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Thomas throws a looping overhand right but Redenbacher ducks down to avoid it.
Redenbacher looks for the body kick but Thomas saw that one coming.
Thomas bobs and weaves well there to avoid the strikes.
Redenbacher tries to work over Thomas's front leg with a kick but Thomas checks it.
Redenbacher takes a shot to the body in his stride.
Redenbacher scores with a kick to the body.
Thomas throws a leg kick but Redenbacher sees it coming and moves out of range.
Thomas throws a looping overhand right but Redenbacher ducks down to avoid it.
Redenbacher misses with a double jab.
Thomas bobs and weaves and unloads with a good uppercut.
Redenbacher throws a body punch but Thomas moves out of range.
Thomas connects with a leg kick. Redenbacher looked like he was expecting something else and didn't defend it.
Redenbacher misses with an attempted mid kick.
Thomas looks to score with a jab to the body but Redenbacher is just out of range.
Thomas connects with a looping right hand.
Thomas scores with a hook.
This has been an exciting period of action!
Thomas walks forward, straight into a front kick from Redenbacher.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Redenbacher throws a quick inside leg kick.
Thomas scores with a slapping inside leg kick.
Redenbacher looking to throw a kick but he's pulled out of it.
Thomas throws a leg kick
and Redenbacher counters nicely by changing levels and landing a hook to the body.
Redenbacher lands with a good body shot.
Thomas looks winded!
Redenbacher throws a right hand that Thomas ducks under and follows up with a left that Thomas also avoids with ease.
Redenbacher thows a left - swing and a miss!
Thomas avoids a lazy jab quite easily.
Thomas thows a leg kick but Redenbacher checks it

and Redenbacher counters by moving into the clinch. Good anticipation by Redenbacher.
Thomas wants to push off and get back to the center of the mat but Redenbacher has him pressed against the cage.
Thomas prevents a body shot from Redenbacher.
A battle for position here, against the cage.
A short right from Redenbacher.
Thomas looking to slow down the pace here.
Redenbacher tries to throw a body punch but Thomas avoids it by throwing Redenbacher back against the cage.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Thomas lands a nice uppercut.
Thomas looking to stall.
Redenbacher misses with a punch to the body.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Thomas.
Thomas is trying to maintain a safe position but Redenbacher gets an underhook and turns Thomas into the cage.
Redenbacher misses with a body punch.
Thomas prevents a body shot from Redenbacher.
Thomas digs a right hand underneath Redenbacher's ribcage. Redenbacher let out a lung full of air as it connected.
Redenbacher lands a body punch in the clinch.
Redenbacher lands a shoulder strike that jolts his opponent's head backwards.
Thomas is trying to slow down the pace in the clinch, to catch his breath.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Redenbacher.
Redenbacher misses with a body punch.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Redenbacher struggles to land a body shot inside as Thomas controls his hands.

Thomas breaks the clinch and we're back to striking at distance.
Redenbacher tries to close the distance and clinch up against the cage but Thomas paws at him with a jab and circles away.
Thomas darts in and out, connecting with a jab.
Redenbacher thows a left - swing and a miss!
Thomas checks a low kick. Bone on bone - not my idea of a good time.
Redenbacher moves into range and lands a nice leg kick.
Thomas scores with a hook to the body. Redenbacher takes a step back and tries to catch his breath.
Redenbacher is looking to take this fight into the clinch.
Thomas avoids a kick to the body.
Redenbacher doesn't manage to clinch there - Thomas circles away.
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
Redenbacher misses with a body shot.
Thomas throws the kick towards the body but Redenbacher avoids it.
Redenbacher scores with a crisp jab that stopped Thomas in his tracks.
Thomas uses decent footwork to sidestep a right hand from Redenbacher.
Redenbacher throws a head kick but Thomas moves out of range.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Orville Redenbacher dominated that round.
That's time! Redenbacher's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight.

Thomas checks the leg kick.
Thomas has been working his punching technique in the buildup to the fight and it appears to be paying off.
Thomas throws a leg kick which misses Redenbacher's front leg but catches the back leg as Redenbacher tries to avoid it.
Redenbacher lands a leg kick and bounces back out of range.
Redenbacher throws a shot from downtown. Thomas moves away and avoids it.
Redenbacher misses with a double jab.
Redenbacher attempts a low kick but it misses it's target.
Thomas lands with a kick to the temple. Redenbacher shrugs as if to say "is that all you've got?"
Redenbacher checks a low kick from Thomas.
Thomas tries to score with an inside leg kick but telegraphs it and Redenbacher is able to avoid easily.
Redenbacher ducks down and throws a hook to the body.

Redenbacher forces Thomas back against the cage and clinches.
Redenbacher is really dominating this fight. Is there anything that Thomas can do to turn this around?
Redenbacher lands a nice shot to the body.

Redenbacher escapes the clinch and we're back to striking.
Thomas avoids the clinch attempt nicely.
Thomas pulls out of a head kick attempt.
Thomas misses with the body kick

and Redenbacher holds on and brings the fighters into a clinch.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Redenbacher tries a body shot but Thomas blocks it.

That's one minute gone in the round.
Redenbacher doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Redenbacher scores with a shoulder strike.
Thomas lands a left hand.
Redenbacher swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Thomas looking to stall.
Redenbacher misses with some punches.
Redenbacher lands a nice looking hook to the body, against the cage.
Thomas is breathing heavily.
Thomas's head jolts backwards as he takes an uppercut right on the button!
Redenbacher lands a shoulder strike that jolts his opponent's head backwards.
Redenbacher works for underhooks and lands a body shot in the process.
Redenbacher tries to throw a body punch but Thomas avoids it by throwing Redenbacher back against the cage.
A short right from Redenbacher on the inside.
Redenbacher works on Thomas's body with a couple of short punches.
Redenbacher lands with a left to the head.
Redenbacher struggles to land a body shot inside as Thomas controls his hands.

That's two minutes gone in the round.
A short right from Redenbacher on the inside.
Orville Redenbacher has scored more points in the clinch so far.
This is a great period of action - very entertaining stuff!
Thomas wants to strike at distance but he can't break free of the clinch.
Redenbacher misses with a punch on the inside.
Thomas is looking to score with knees to the body. Maybe he'll change it up and go body then head. Redenbacher is defending well for now.
Redenbacher lands a shoulder strike.
A battle for position here, against the cage.
Redenbacher tries to land a shot to the body but it's blocked.
Redenbacher scores with an uppercut up the middle.
A short left from Redenbacher.
Redenbacher misses with a punch to the body.
Thomas stalling the fight.
Redenbacher scores with a shoulder strike.
Redenbacher misses with a shot to the kidneys.
An uppercut to the body lands inside from Redenbacher.
A hook to the body from Redenbacher.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Redenbacher misses with a hook from the clinch.
Redenbacher lands punches inside but they're not really causing much damage.
Both fighters working to control the clinch.
Redenbacher swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Thomas throws a punch but it's blocked by Redenbacher.
A nice left hand lands by Redenbacher.
A short uppercut from Redenbacher.
Thomas is looking to control Redenbacher's arms but Redenbacher gets an underhook and turns him. Now Thomas has his back to the cage.
Redenbacher throws a head punch that misses.
Thomas is trying to maintain a safe position but Redenbacher gets an underhook and turns Thomas into the cage.
Redenbacher tries to throw a body punch but Thomas avoids it by throwing Redenbacher back against the cage.

Thomas breaks from the clinch.

Redenbacher gets in close and instigates a clinch.
Both fighters working to control the clinch.
Redenbacher doesn't land with the attempted body shot.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Redenbacher has Thomas pressed against the cage, preventing Thomas from circling away and getting back to striking at range.
Redenbacher throws a head punch that misses.
Redenbacher goes for a body shot but it's blocked.
Redenbacher lands a hook to the body. It's hard to tell if that hurt Thomas or not.
A head punch blocked on the inside by Thomas.
Redenbacher working some nice short punches in the clinch.
Redenbacher lands a shoulder strike.
The crowd cheering loudly, showing their appreciation for the quality fight we're seeing here.
Redenbacher working on landing some head shots here - that one got through nicely.
With the fighters clinched against the cage, Redenbacher creates a bit of distance for himself and scores with a nice uppercut.
Redenbacher has a couple of punches blocked by Thomas.
Redenbacher throws a blind hook that connects with the side of Thomass head.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Redenbacher.
Redenbacher struggles to land a body shot inside as Thomas controls his hands.
Redenbacher misses with a punch to the body.
Redenbacher misses with a hook from the clinch.
Thomas tries to stall but Redenbacher uses the opportunity to gain a better position.
And that’s the end of the round – the fighters go back to their corners.

Orville Redenbacher dominated that second round.
That's time! Redenbacher's corner gives him a slap on the ass as he gets ready to fight. And we move into the final round!

Redenbacher tries to clinch up against the cage, rushing in to close the distance. Thomas manages to break the clinch and circles back to the middle of the mat.
Thomas chopping away at his opponent's legs.
Thomas connects with a good right hand that stumbles Redenbacher. Redenbacher circles away out of range and recomposes himself.
A low kick from Thomas misses
and Redenbacher counters with an inside leg kick.
Thomas blocks a head kick by Redenbacher.
Redenbacher throws a one two combo.
Thomas throws a head kick but Redenbacher moves out of range.
Thomas takes a shot to the eye socket. That's gotta hurt.
Redenbacher lands a head shot.

Thomas is rocked!
Thomas avoids the head kick by Redenbacher.
Thomas drops his hands and takes a jab to the jaw for his troubles.
Thomas is still on wobbly legs! Can Redenbacher finish him?
Wooooo! Give it up for these two warriors! They are putting on a show!
A jab from Redenbacher misses.
Thomas seems to have recovered his senses.
Thomas takes a big intake of breath there - he's definitely tired.
Thomas throws a head kick that half lands.
Redenbacher throws a head kick that looked like it stung.
Thomas tries a head kick but it misses.

That's one minute gone in the round.

Redenbacher gets to the clinch - let's see what his plan is here.
Redenbacher misses with a hook from the clinch.
Thomas is trying to slow down the pace in the clinch, to catch his breath.
Redenbacher throws a head punch that misses.
Thomas working aggressively here.
Redenbacher swings away with an uppercut that misses.
Redenbacher lands with a short shot to the head.
Redenbacher misses with a hook to the ribs.
Both fighters working to control the clinch.
Redenbacher tries a shoulder strike but it doesn't do any damage.
Thomas can't break the clinch.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Redenbacher.
Thomas is trying to slow down the pace in the clinch, to catch his breath.
Thomas is persisting with his attempts to control the action in the clinch, rather than do any real damage.
Jackson Thomas has stepped it up - he knows he needs a finish here!

That's two minutes gone in the round.
Thomas tries a body shot but Redenbacher blocks it.
Thomas is trying to slow down the pace of the fight but Redenbacher is keeping busy.
Redenbacher scores with a shot to the side of Thomas's head.
Redenbacher doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Good anti-grappling being displayed by Redenbacher as Thomas tries to tie him up.
Redenbacher misses with a punch to the body.
An uppercut on the inside fails to land for Redenbacher.
Good body shot from Redenbacher.
Thomas holding his opponent close, against the cage.
Thomas struggles to land a body shot inside as Redenbacher controls his hands.
Redenbacher scores with an uppercut up the middle.

That's three minutes gone in the round.
Thomas blocks a body shot from Redenbacher.
Thomas wants to push off and get back to the center of the mat but Redenbacher has him pressed against the cage.
Redenbacher digs a right hand into Thomas's ribs. Those have got to be taking their toll on Thomas's gas tank.
Redenbacher tries to throw a body punch but Thomas avoids it by throwing Redenbacher back against the cage.
Redenbacher misses with a hook to the ribs.
Thomas doesn't land with the attempted body shot.
Redenbacher lands a nice shot to the body.
Redenbacher misses with a hook to the ribs.
Redenbacher swings wildly with an uppercut but Thomas uses good head movement to avoid it.
Redenbacher makes some space for himself and lands an uppercut.
Thomas misses with a body punch.
Thomas stalling in the clinch but Redenbacher improves position.
Redenbacher working on landing some head shots here - that one got through nicely.
Redenbacher misses with a body punch.
Orville Redenbacher is fighting for a decision here - he's started to take the cautious approach.
A short right from Redenbacher on the inside.

That's four minutes gone in the round.
Redenbacher softening up his opponent with strikes, against the cage.
Redenbacher has a couple of punches blocked by Thomas.
Thomas stalling here - the referee won't stand for too much of that.
Nice body punch from Redenbacher - that landed with a thud.
Redenbacher lands an uppercut.
Redenbacher misses with the head strike.
Thomas misses with a hook to the ribs.
Redenbacher tried to land a shot to the body but connects with Thomas's elbow.
Thomas taking a breather.
The fans in attendance giving it up for the two fighters, who have really let it all hang out in the last minute or so!
Thomas lands a short shot on the inside that snaps the head of Redenbacher backwards.
A nice left hand lands by Redenbacher.
Thomas blocks an uppercut.
Redenbacher doesn't land with the attempted body shot.

And that's the end of the fight!
Orville Redenbacher showed his dominance in that final round.
Well Redenbacher has outscored his opponent in every aspect of the fight today. Only a scarily incompetent judge or two will keep him from a well deserved win... Over to the ring announcer for the scorecards.

Ladies and gentlemen, after 3 rounds of action, we go to the scorecards for a decision.
Judge Robert Twigg scores the fight 30:27
Judge Gwen Towbar scores the fight 30:27
Judge Stewart Dunkirk scores the fight 30:27

In favor of your winner, by unanimous decision... Orville Redenbacher!
Orville Redenbacher decided to thank the fans in attendance for making a great atmosphere. It seemed to go down pretty well.
In defeat, Jackson Thomas stepped up to the mic, saying 'It's at times like this, one must reach deeply into his soul,challenge his heart, feel new courage, endure the fuck pain and say 'FUCK ISLAM AND MOHAMMED WAS A PEDOPHILE''.